Name: 【TED】索拉雅奇梅利: 女人憤怒的力量 (The power of women's anger | Soraya Chemaly)
Uploaded: 2019-02-28T16:38:12.000Z
Duration: 11 min 44 s

譯者: Lilian Chiu 審譯者: 易帆 余

and it took me many years to be able to say just those words.

為了說出這幾個字 花了我好多年的時間。

sometimes my body thrums, I'm so enraged.

我的身體有時會顫抖，我會很憤怒。

But no matter how justified my anger has been,

但無論我的怒火有多正當的理由，

I've always been led to understand that my anger is an exaggeration,

我一直被教育，我的怒火是一種誇大、

認為這怒火會讓我顯得無禮且不討喜。

Mainly as a girl, I learned, as a girl, that anger is an emotion

主要是身為女孩，我了解到身為女孩，憤怒是一種情緒，

When I was 15, I came home from school one day,

我十五歲時，有一天我放學回家，

and she was standing on a long veranda outside of our kitchen,

Imagine how dumbfounded I was when she started to throw them like Frisbees...

想像當她把盤子當飛盤般扔向我時，我有多目瞪口呆……

When every single plate had shattered into thousands of pieces

she walked back in and she said to me, cheerfully, "How was your day?"

她走回屋內，開心地對我說： 「你今天過得如何？」

Now you can see how a child would look at an incident like this

各位應該可以理解孩子在面對這樣的事件之後，

and think that anger is silent, isolating, destructive, even frightening.

會以為憤怒是沉默的、孤立的、 摧毀性的，甚至是可怕的。

Especially though when the person who's angry is a girl or a woman.

特別是當憤怒的人是一位女孩或女人的時候。

Anger is a human emotion, neither good nor bad.

憤怒是一種人類情緒，沒有好壞。

It warns us of indignity, threat, insult and harm.

憤怒是一種情緒， 屈辱、威脅、侮辱和傷害發出警告。

And yet, in culture after culture, anger is reserved as the moral property

然而，在各個文化的認知當中，

憤怒這品格特質 被保留給男孩和男人。

an angry black man is viewed as a criminal,

但憤怒的白人卻被認為有公德心。

Regardless of where we are, however, the emotion is gendered.

然而，不論在哪個地方，這種情緒都有性別差異。

And so we teach children to disdain anger in girls and women,

所以，我們會去教導孩子鄙視女孩和女人的憤怒，

and we grow up to be adults that penalize it.

What if we didn't sever anger from femininity?

如果我們不把憤怒和女性氣質分開來談，會怎樣？

Because severing anger from femininity means we sever girls and women

from the emotion that best protects us from injustice.

What if instead we thought about developing emotional competence

最能保護她們的情緒也被切斷了。

The fact is we still remarkably socialize children

直接培養男孩和女孩 處理情緒的能力呢？

事實上，我們的社會還是會用二分法

Boys are held to absurd, rigid norms of masculinity --

或非常對立的方式 將男女生分別看待。也就是，男孩要遵守荒唐又死板的男子氣概標準—

told to renounce the feminine emotionality of sadness or fear

告訴他們不能夠有女性特有的悲傷或害怕的特質，

and to embrace aggression and anger as markers of real manhood.

且直接面對侵略和憤怒才是真男人的表現。

On the other hand, girls learn to be deferential,

另一方面，女孩則要學會三從四德，

and anger is incompatible with deference.

In the same way that we learned to cross our legs and tame our hair,

同樣地，我們女生得學會兩腿併好，把頭髮梳順，

we learned to bite our tongues and swallow our pride.

我們得學會忍著不說出自己的感覺，把自尊往肚裡吞。

What happens too often is that for all of us,

indignity becomes imminent in our notions of femininity.

女性觀念使得侮辱變得迫在眉睫。

There's a long personal and political tale to that bifurcation.

此個人觀感與政治都不正確的二分法是長久以來存在的謊言。

In anger, we go from being spoiled princesses and hormonal teens,

一旦發怒就會被扣上這些帽子：犯公主病、荷爾蒙作怪的青少年，

to high maintenance women and shrill, ugly nags.

或難以伺候、愛尖叫 又醜又嘮叨的女人。

We have flavors, though; pick your flavor.

Are you a spicy hot Latina when you're mad?

當你生氣時，你是火辣的拉丁美洲女郎嗎？

Or a sad Asian girl? An angry black woman? Or a crazy white one?

還是悲傷的亞洲女孩？憤怒的黑人女性？抓狂的白種女人？

But in fact, the effect is that when we say what's important to us,

但，事實上，效應就是當我們說出對我們重要的事，

people are more likely to get angry at us for being angry.

大家比較有可能會對我們的憤怒而感到生氣。

Whether we're at home or in school or at work or in a political arena,

不論我們在家、在學校、在工作，或在政治舞台，

anger confirms masculinity, and it confounds femininity.

憤怒是男子氣概的表現，這會混淆我們對女性特質的定義。

所以，男人展現憤怒會被獎賞，

and women are penalized for doing the same.

This puts us at an enormous disadvantage,

particularly when we have to defend ourselves and our own interests.

特別是當我們得要保護自己或守護自身利益時。

If we're faced with a threatening street harasser, predatory employer,

如果我們面臨有威脅性的街頭騷擾者、掠奪型的僱主、

our brains are screaming, "Are you kidding me?"

實際上我們的大腦是在尖叫：「你在耍我嗎？」

但我們的嘴巴卻只能說：「我很抱歉，怎麼了？」

And it's conflicting because the anger gets all tangled up

with the anxiety and the fear and the risk and retaliation.

恐懼、風險、報復都糾纏在一起。

If you ask women what they fear the most in response to their anger,

如果問女人，她們最怕別人在她們憤怒時做出什麼樣的反應，

If you have multiple marginalized  identities, it's not just mockery.

如果你有多種被邊緣化的身份，受到的就不僅僅是嘲弄。

If you defend yourself, if you put a stake in the ground,

如果你勇敢站出來為自己發聲，

Now we reproduce these patterns not in big, bold and blunt ways,

如今，我們不會大辣辣地讓這些事一再發生，

但卻不知不覺地，每天在我們的日常生活中一直出現。

When my daughter was in preschool, every single morning

前陣子，我女兒去上幼稚園，每天早上，

she built an elaborate castle -- ribbons and blocks --

她都會建造一座精緻的城堡—絲帶和積木—

and every single morning the same boy knocked it down gleefully.

每天早上，同一個男孩都會興高采烈地把它撞倒。

His parents were there, but they never intervened before the fact.

他的父母也在場，卻不會在事發前干預。

They were happy to provide platitudes afterwards:

他們總是在事後 很開心的說些陳腔濫調：

"It's so tempting, he just couldn't help himself."

「這太誘人了，他無法控制自己。」

I did what many girls and women learn to do.

我所做的事，是許多女孩和女人學會做的事。

and I taught my daughter to do the same thing.

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【TED】索拉雅奇梅利: 女人憤怒的力量 (The power of women's anger | Soraya Chemaly)

anxiety

recognize

enormous

deserve