But lately, it seems like more and more of them are turning toxic.

但最近，似乎越來越多的人開始變得有毒。

Or has it been like this for a long time but we're only realizing it now?

還是說這種情況由來已久，只是我們現在才意識到？

First off, let's define what we mean by toxic.

首先，讓我們定義一下 「有毒」的含義。

A toxic relationship is one where there's a lot of negativity, manipulation and unhealthy behavior going on.

有毒的關係是指存在大量負面情緒、操縱和不健康行為的關係。

It's like a dark cloud hanging over your head, making you feel drained and unhappy.

這就像一片烏雲籠罩在你的頭頂，讓你感到疲憊和不快。

So, why are there so many relationships like this these days?

那麼，為什麼現在有這麼多這樣的關係呢？

Let's break down a few common reasons.

讓我們來分析一下幾個常見的原因。

The wrong blueprint.

錯誤的藍圖。

Think about your own upbringing for a moment.

想想你自己的成長經歷。

What kind of environment did you grow up in?

你在什麼樣的環境中長大？

What kind of relationship did your parents have?

你的父母是什麼關係？

How did your family treat you?

你的家人是如何對待你的？

Our childhood experiences have a profound impact on how we view relationships as adults, whether or not we realize it.

無論我們是否意識到，童年的經歷都會對我們成年後如何看待人際關係產生深遠的影響。

You see, our family members are like the architects of our emotional blueprint.

你看，我們的家人就像是我們情感藍圖的設計師。

We learn from their example what love, respect and communication should look like.

我們從他們身上學到了愛、尊重和溝通的樣子。

So, if you grew up with any unhealthy dynamics in your family, say for example, frequent shouting and yelling or a lack of emotional support, you might unintentionally replicate those behaviors in your own relationships.

所以，如果你的家庭中存在任何不健康的成長動力，比如經常大喊大叫或缺乏情感支持，你可能會無意中在自己的人際關係中複製這些行為。

All About Attachment.

關於依戀。

Ever heard of attachment theory?

聽說過依戀理論嗎？

It's the idea that our early experiences with caregivers shape our attachment styles, which in turn affect how we relate to others later in life.

這種觀點認為，我們與照顧者的早期經歷塑造了我們的依戀方式，而這種依戀方式又會影響我們日後與他人的關係。

If you have a secure attachment, you're more likely to feel comfortable with intimacy and trust in relationships.

如果你有安全的依戀關係，你就更有可能在親密關係和信任關係中感到自在。

But if you have an anxious attachment, you're prone to constantly seeking reassurance from your partners.

但如果你有焦慮型依戀，你就容易不斷尋求伴侶的安慰。

You might find yourself feeling clingy or needy because you have a strong fear of abandonment or rejection, something you likely experienced from your parents.

你可能會發現自己感覺很粘人或有需要，因為你對被拋棄或被拒絕有強烈的恐懼感，這很可能是你從父母那裡經歷過的。

Then there's avoidant attachment.

然後是迴避型依戀。

It's when you find it hard to rely on others or open up emotionally in relationships.

當你發現自己在人際關係中很難依賴他人或敞開情感時，就是這種情況。

You might push people away to protect yourself from getting hurt and think it's always better to leave before you're left.

你可能會把別人推開，以保護自己不受傷害，並認為在被拋棄之前離開總是比較好的。

A common reason for this is if your parents were emotionally distant or ignored your needs growing up.

造成這種情況的一個常見原因是，你的父母在情感上與你疏遠，或者在你的成長過程中忽視了你的需求。

Communication breakdown.

溝通中斷。

Whenever there was a problem, how did your family deal with it?

每當出現問題時，你的家人是如何處理的？

Did you feel comfortable enough to open up to your family about your true feelings and struggles?

向家人敞開心扉，傾訴自己的真實感受和掙扎，你是否感到足夠自在？

Or were you ashamed for crying or told to just sweep it all under the rug?

或者，你是否因為哭泣而感到羞恥，或者被告知要把一切都掩蓋起來？

Did you grow up feeling like you had to lie or keep secrets from your own parents?

在你的成長過程中，你是否覺得必須對自己的父母撒謊或保守祕密？

Effective communication is key to healthy relationships, but many of us didn't learn those skills growing up, leaving us unsure how to express our needs and feelings in a constructive way.

有效的溝通是健康人際關係的關鍵，但我們中的許多人在成長過程中並沒有學到這些技能，是以不知道如何以建設性的方式表達自己的需求和感受。

Without clear communication, misunderstandings and resentment can fester, turning a relationship toxic.

沒有清晰的溝通，誤解和怨恨就會發酵，使關係變得有毒。

A lack of accountability.

缺乏責任感。

In a toxic household, there's often a lack of accountability.

在一個有毒的家庭中，往往缺乏責任感。

Instead of working together to solve problems, family members resort to pointing fingers and deflecting blame.

家庭成員不是齊心協力解決問題，而是相互指責、推卸責任。

It's a frustrating cycle that leaves everyone feeling misunderstood and unheard.

這是一個令人沮喪的循環，讓每個人都感到被誤解、被忽視。

Maybe you've experienced this firsthand, watching your parents engage in endless cycles of blame-shifting and playing the victim, where no one takes responsibility for their actions.

也許你曾親身經歷過這種情況，看著父母無休止地推卸責任，扮演受害者，沒有人為自己的行為負責。

Growing up in this environment can normalize these bad habits.

在這樣的環境中長大，會讓這些壞習慣正常化。

And while forgiveness is important, it shouldn't come at the expense of allowing toxic behavior to continue.

寬恕固然重要，但不應以允許有毒行為繼續存在為代價。

Familiarity breeds comfort.

熟能生巧。

It's human nature to fear change and uncertainty, even if we know it's best for us.

害怕變化和不確定性是人類的天性，即使我們知道這樣做對我們最好。

If you've had negative past experiences, like rejection, abandonment or emotional neglect, it may cause you to gravitate towards relationships that feel safe but ultimately perpetuate the same toxic patterns.

如果你過去有過消極的經歷，比如被拒絕、被遺棄或情感上被忽視，這可能會讓你傾向於那些感覺安全但最終會延續同樣有毒模式的關係。

It's like staying on a sinking ship.

這就像待在一艘正在下沉的船上。

You're trying to convince yourself everything's fine, but deep down, you know it's time to go.

你試圖說服自己一切都好，但在內心深處，你知道是時候離開了。

If any of this resonates with you, know that you're not alone.

如果你對這些內容有任何共鳴，請知道你並不孤單。

Many of us have been impacted by our past experiences, and it's okay to acknowledge that.

我們許多人都受到過往經歷的影響，承認這一點並沒有什麼關係。

But it's also important to recognize that we have the power to change the narrative.

但同樣重要的是要認識到，我們有能力改變這種說法。

Remember, you deserve love and respect in your relationships.

請記住，在人際關係中，你應該得到愛和尊重。

With self-awareness, healing and a willingness to grow, you can break free from the cycle of toxicity and create the fulfilling connections you deserve.

有了自我意識、治療和成長的意願，你就能擺脫毒性的循環，創造出你應得的美滿聯繫。

So, do you have any insights of your own about why so many relationships today seem to be toxic?

那麼，對於為什麼如今如此多的人際關係似乎都是有毒的，你有什麼自己的見解嗎？

We'd love to hear from you in the comments down below.

歡迎你在下方留言。

And if you're interested in diving deeper into this topic, check out our other videos on"6 Signs Your Trauma Is Making You Lonely" and "Do You Love Them Or Just Attached?"

如果你有興趣深入探討這個話題，請觀看我們的其他影片，瞭解「創傷讓你變得孤獨的六個跡象」以及「你是愛他們還是只是依戀他們？」

Don't forget to hit that like button, share this video, and subscribe to our channel for more insightful mental health content.

別忘了按讚，分享這部影片，並訂閱我們的頻道，獲取更多有深度的心理健康內容。

Thanks for watching!

感謝觀看！