Name: 我愛他吧......？6 個徵兆讓妳發現其實妳不愛他 (6 Signs You Were Never in Love)
Uploaded: 2019-03-16T21:01:20.000Z
Duration: 4 min 59 s

Many people seek love or to be in a relationships.

許多人都在尋求屬於自己的愛情或希望建立一段關係。

But that involves growth which can at times be painful, compromised and vulnerability.

但這必定也包含了成長的過程，你可能會面臨痛苦、妥協或受到傷害。

情態副詞

Love demands that we constantly improve, be more understanding and practice patience.

一段感情需要雙方持續地進步、變得更善解人意並培養耐心。

On the flip side, it also means knowing when things just aren't working out anymore and having the guts to leave.

另一方面我們也要知道，當這段感情已經無法繼續走下去時，我們就該鼓起勇氣結束它。

對自己的感情狀態感到困惑嗎？

以下我們會分享 6 個其實你不愛對方的徵兆。

One: you moved things fast with your partner.

第一點：你對這段感情的步調太過快速。

Infatuation thrives on speed while love takes time to develop.

「迷戀」通常是快速地發生，但「愛」則是慢慢培養出來的。

Relationship expert Susan Winter says "Infatuation lives in illusion. Love can survive reality".

戀愛專家蘇珊．溫特表示：「迷戀只能在自己的幻想中存在；愛才能夠禁得起現實生活的考驗。」

When you're quick to jump in a relationship with someone, you base it off your dreams more than whose really in front of you.

當你很快就決定跟某人在一起，很多時候你是為了談戀愛而戀愛，並非因為你覺得他是對的人。

Common examples include fantasizing about your future with them, lusting after them, and obsessing about them.

舉例來說你可能會幻想你跟他的未來、渴望佔有他或迷戀他。

All done only after a few weeks of knowing them.

而這些行為都是在你認識他沒多久就產生的。

第二點：你總期望對方沒有任何缺點。

And then you get angry or disappointed when they show you their true colors.

但當對方顯露本性時，你便會對此感到憤怒或失望。

But Winter states that infatuation needs perfection in order to survive.

但溫特表示，對方必須符合你的完美想像，迷戀的情感才得以存在。

When you expect your partner to be consistently well dressed, good with their words or impressive with their accomplishments, you're not giving them space to be honest with you.

當你期望你的另一伴永遠都要精心打扮、善於言詞、或擁有那些傲人的成就時，你便扼殺了他對你坦誠的空間。

When you love someone, you accept their imperfections, work through the bad and enjoy the good together.

當你愛上某人，你會接受他的缺點，願意跟他一起同甘共苦。

Three: you're not comfortable enough around them.

第三點：跟他相處時，你會感到不夠自在。

Okay, who hasn't felt self-conscious about saying the wrong thing or making a bad impression?

在說錯話或給別人留下不好的印象時，我們都會感到忸怩、侷促。

But when you truly fall in love with someone, that's when you can let loose and stop caring so much.

但當你真的愛上對方，你便不用顧慮這麼多，而可以在他的面前放鬆做自己。

Doctor Brené Brown, a research expert on vulnerability discovered that those who have a strong sense of love and belonging are more open to vulnerability.

專門研究人性脆弱的 Brené Brown 博士發現，那些較能夠坦然面對脆弱的人往往擁有很強的愛與歸屬感。

Whereas those who feel disconnected with their partners consistently build their walls up.

而那些在伴侶身上找不到愛與歸屬感的人，便會在心中築起保護自己的高牆。

When you don't share your emotions and struggles, nor secrets with someone, you haven't fully loved.

如果你不願意跟對方分享你的情緒、心裡的掙扎或秘密，你就是沒有全心全意地愛上他。

第四點：你變得跟對方有距離。

It's normal for passion to intensify initially, only to taper off into a steady relationship.

在感情剛開始時，你對另一方的愛本來就會越發強烈，而關係穩定後，這種激情便會漸漸淡去。

But two people in love will still want to be around each other frequently.

但相愛的兩人依舊會想多多陪伴在對方身邊。

If you find yourself wanting to get away from your partner more and more these days, cancelling dinner plans often because you'd rather go hang out with your friends or family or cat, then something's up.

如果你發現最近你越來越想逃離伴侶身邊，常常為了跟朋友、家人或貓相處而取消晚餐約會，那麼這段關係可能已經結束了。

Five: your mind is elsewhere, and soon your heart follows, too.

第五點：你的心思已經不在他身上了，而且不久之後，你的心也會跟著離開。

Stephen Betchen, author of "Magnetic Partners" states that "Partners who are in love tend to maintain a focus on their counterparts."

《相吸的我們》一書的作者史蒂芬．貝欽說道：「相愛的兩人往往會注意著彼此。」

When you notice the little things about them, or express concern when the two of you run into conflict, it shows that you care for them.

當你發現對方身上的小改變或在爭吵時提出自己擔心的點，這就是你在乎對方的證明。

But if you avoid those tough conversations or slip away from arguments, you also stop emphasizing their importance in your life.

但如果你總想迴避這類的對話或只想從爭吵中脫身，那也就代表對方對你來說已不再這麼重要。

第六點：你開始感到越來越焦慮。

Have you been experiencing digestive problems or have trouble sleeping?

你有消化不良或睡不好的問題嗎？

Psychologist Kate Balestrieri and Doctor Anne Sheeber both say that anxiety can show in these bodily dysfunctions.

心理學家 Kate Balestrieri 和 Anne Sheeber 博士都說道，焦慮會導致身體機能失調。

You might have something you need to get off your chest and dread how to break the news to your partner.

你可能需要宣洩情緒，但同時卻也害怕跟你的伴侶分享你的心情。

Remember, you can only run away from the truth for so long before it catches up to you.

別忘了，你也只能在這段關係完全破滅之前，逃避你們可能已經不愛彼此的事實。

Forcing love when it's absent will only hurt the two of you.

一段強求而來的愛情只會傷害彼此。

Both of you deserve to find love elsewhere if it cannot be found in your relationship.

如果你們的愛情裡已經沒有了愛，那你們雙方都值得去追尋更適合自己的戀情。

Where do you think you stand on your feelings?

To learn more about the signs you're falling in love, check out our video here.

想知道自己是不是墜入愛河了嗎？看看這部影片吧！

Hey guys! My name is Yumi, and I am one of the partners of Pysch2Go.

哈囉大家好！我是 Yumi，也是 Pysch2Go 團隊的其中一員。

Today, I am not only here to introduce myself, but to also introduce you guys to our amazing Pysch2Go magazines!

今天我不只要來介紹我自己，也要把這本超讚的 Pysch2Go 雜誌介紹給你們。

These magazines were all created by our amazing and talented magazine manager, Imogen.

這本雜誌是出自我們雜誌部的主管 Imogen 之手，她真的很讚又很有天分。

She put all her time and hard work just to create this for you guys, so everyone can have a little piece of Pysch2Go wherever you guys are.

為了各位，她花了許多時間及心力做出這本雜誌。所以不管你們走到哪裡，都可以輕鬆讀上一篇 Pysch2Go 出品的文章囉。

So, we're gonna do a little giveaway right now.

所以我們現在要來辦個小小的抽獎活動。

So, were gonna pick 3 winners! Um...there's no deadline to this at all, and all you gotta do is 3 little things, ok?

我們將會選出三位得主！這個活動沒有截止期限，大家要做的就是三件簡單的小事，好嗎？

Number 1 is to follow and subscribe to our Youtube channel if you haven't done so already.

首先，如果你還沒訂閱我們的 YouTube 頻道，請先訂閱以追蹤我們。

Number 2 is either take a picture of, you know...this picture right here, a screenshot...or any picture of Pysch2Go, and #Pysch2Go on your social media, Instagram, Facebook, Tumblr, whatever it is.

接著要拍張照，你可以拍照、截圖現在這個畫面，或拍下任何跟 Pysch2Go 有關的照片，分享到你的 Instagram、Facebook、Tumblr 都好。

And number 3, I'll gonna have a link down below, of a really short questionnaire for us to connect with you, or get to know you guys a little bit more ok?

最後，我會在下方貼上一個問卷的連結，希望可以藉此跟大家互動並更了解大家。

But that's about it! We want to thank you for all your support, through our amazing amazing psychology company, and we wouldn't be here without you guys.

就是這樣囉！心理學團隊要感謝大家一直以來的支持，沒有你們也就沒有今天的我們。

So thank you! And thanks for tuning in! Bye!

所以謝謝大家！謝謝你們的收看！掰掰！