Name: 川普開戰伊朗！柯林頓證實愛潑斯坦內幕！波伯特解析通貨膨脹！ (Trump Goes to War with Iran, Bill Clinton Testifies About Epstein & Boebert Explains Inflation)
Uploaded: 2026-03-03T21:40:40.000Z
Duration: 15 min 14 s

Jimmy，我是這個節目的主持人。

Thank you for joining us here in our studio.

You know, when we left you last week on Thursday night, we were not at war.

你知道，上星期四晚上我們離開的時候，我們還沒有開戰。

And yeah, he used to say the one thing that surprised me about Donald Trump in a good way is that he hadn't gotten us into any wars.

而且，他以前說過，唐納·川普有一點讓我驚喜的地方是，他沒有讓我們捲入任何戰爭。

Now there's nothing good about him in retrospect.

現在回想起來，他沒有任何好的地方。

We should have seen this coming two weeks ago when he convened the first meeting of, of his new Board of Peace.

兩週前，當他召開他的新和平委員會第一次會議時，我們就應該預料到這一點。

He met with the Board of Peace, eight days later, we're at war.

他會見了和平委員會，八天後，我們就開戰了。

Turns out they probably should have just given him that Nobel Prize.

結果他們大概早該給他諾貝爾獎了。

我是說，還記得《星際大戰》嗎？

R2D2 is playing Chester Chewbacca, and C3PO suggests he let the Wookiee win.

R2D2 正在扮演 Chester Chewbacca，而 C3PO 建議他讓伍基人贏。

Guillermo, I know you and the Ayatollah were very close, right?

Guillermo，我知道你和阿亞托拉關係很好，對吧？

Every morning Guillermo would call him, he'd say, hola, Ayatollah.

Guillermo 每天早上都會打電話給他，他會說，你好，阿亞托拉。

我相信你會找到新的阿亞托拉。

I feel like they could have killed him by slamming a door really hard.

我覺得他們可以把他用力關門殺死。

It's early Saturday morning, just after midnight, the Pentagon launched what they are calling Operation Epic Fury, which is different from its original title, which was Operation Epstino Distracto.

現在是週六凌晨，剛過午夜，五角大廈發動了他們稱之為「史詩級憤怒行動」，這和他們最初的標題「史詩級分散注意力行動」不同。

They did it in concert with Israeli forces.

他們是與以色列軍隊協同行動的。

It required intense secrecy, which is why Donald Trump watched it unfold from his membership only beach resort in Florida.

這需要極度的保密，所以唐納·川普在佛羅裡達他唯一會員才能進入的海灘度假村觀看了事態的發展。

From the very spot on which just two months ago, Vanilla Ice performed on stage with a Ninja Turtle.

就在兩個月前，Vanilla Ice 還在這裡的舞臺上和忍者龜一起表演。

The President monitored the attack from his super secure bunker at Mar A Lag.

總統在他的超級安全掩體 Mar A Lag 監控了這次攻擊。

Don't worry, I'm sure these fabric curtains are totally soundproof.

別擔心，我確定這些布簾完全隔音。

Trump probably just came in from the golf course.

川普大概是剛從高爾夫球場回來。

He's sitting there, he's sweating like a yam and a hat.

他坐在那裡，滿頭大汗，像個地瓜戴了頂帽子。

And for whatever reason, they released a photo with a map in the background that revealed all the Iranian American target locations, which surprises me.

而且不知道為什麼，他們發布了一張照片，背景裡有一張地圖，揭露了所有伊朗裔美國人的目標地點，這讓我很驚訝。

He launched a top secret military strike from the same kind of enclosure they used to sell hummus at A farmers market.

他從一個以前在農夫市集賣鷹嘴豆泥的那種地方，發動了一場絕密軍事打擊。

You know, people stay at Mar a Lago, they have guests on site who rent rooms for.

你知道，人們住在 Mar-a-Lago，他們有客人會租房間。

Don't go in the cabana next to the pool house.

別進那個泳池小屋旁邊的涼亭。

They're having World War Three in there tonight.

他們今晚要在裡面打第三次世界大戰了。

Trump claims the operation in Iran could last four to five weeks or longer, and

川普聲稱，在伊朗的行動可能會持續四到五週或更久，

Of course, our supremist leader launched this attack without getting approval from Congress, which is something regular presidents do all the time.

當然，我們至高無上的領導人發動這次攻擊，沒有經過國會準許，這可是尋常總統都會做的事。

Six Americans were killed in the counterattacks, which is terrible and tragic, and

六名美國人在反擊中喪生，這真是太糟糕、太悲慘了，

I hope that we show their families how grateful we are for this sacrifice that they made.

我希望我們能讓他們的家人知道，我們對他們所做的犧牲有多感激。

of course, our president would have gone over there to fight himself were it not for those pesky bone spurs that still haven't healed up.

當然，我們的總統如果不是因為那些惱人的骨刺還沒癒合，早就親自過去那裡戰鬥了。

And look, I think we could all probably agree that the world's a better place without the ayatollah, but

而且你看，我想我們大概都能同意，沒有了阿亞圖拉，世界會是個更好的地方，但是

no one seems to understand why it was so urgent and that we attack immediately.

沒人明白為什麼這麼緊急，而且我們要立刻攻擊。

Even Ted Cruz said he saw no indication that Iran was close to getting nuclear weapons.

就連泰德·克魯茲都說，他沒有看到任何跡象表明伊朗即將獲得核武器。

And wasn't Donald Trump supposed to be the president of peace?

而且唐納·川普不是 supposed to be 追求和平的總統嗎？

I will Prevent World War 3 as only I can.

我將以我獨有的方式阻止第三次世界大戰。

我們不會發生第三次世界大戰。

I will have the disastrous war between Russia and Ukraine settled.

我將會解決俄羅斯和烏克蘭之間的災難性戰爭。

I will get it settled before I even become president.

在我成為總統之前，我會將它解決。

I'll get that thing settled before I take the office.

在我上任之前，我會把那件事解決。

我一天之內就會解決那場戰爭。

我會在24小時內解決那場戰爭。

My proudest legacy will be that of a peacemaker and unifier.

我最引以為傲的傳承，將會是作為一位和平締造者和團結者。

That's what I want to be, a peacemaker and a unifier.

這就是我想要的，成為一位和平締造者和團結者。

TRUMP has been now, after the bombing, calling for the Iranian people to rise up to topple the regime, which is the opposite of what he said he would do usually.

在轟炸之後，TRUMP 一直呼籲伊朗人民起義推翻政權，這跟他平常說的完全相反。

You know, he usually only calls for the overthrow of a government when he loses an election, but

你知道，他通常只有在輸掉選舉時才會呼籲推翻政府，但是

Immediately after the attack, the president offered this message of hope and liberation to.

攻擊發生後，總統立刻向伊朗人民傳達了希望與解放的訊息。

那是他在星期五在Whataburger的樣子。

That's what he should be invading fast food restaurants.

這才是他應該進攻速食餐廳的樣子。

Trump is suddenly all about toppling regimes, which is interesting cuz I remember a time when the idea that a president would start a war because he couldn't make a deal was seen by some as a negative.

川普突然之間全都想推翻政權，這很有趣，因為我記得有段時間，總統因為談不成生意就發動戰爭的想法，有些人認為是負面的。

Our president will start a war with Iran because he has absolutely no ability to negotiate.

我們的總統會因為他完全沒有談判能力而和伊朗開戰。

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川普開戰伊朗！柯林頓證實愛潑斯坦內幕！波伯特解析通貨膨脹！ (Trump Goes to War with Iran, Bill Clinton Testifies About Epstein & Boebert Explains Inflation)

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