And I'm here to talk to my mom about coming out.

今天要來跟我媽聊聊我的出櫃。

I only came out to her because I had to and I have not talked to her about that moment since.

我當時會跟她出櫃是迫不得已的，從那時起我都還沒跟她聊過這件事。

Let's call her.

來打給她吧！

Hi! Oh my god, look at your hair!

嗨！天啊，妳的頭髮！

I knew you would say that.

就知道妳會注意到。

Can you tilt your laptop a little bit towards your face?

可以把鏡頭對準妳的臉一點嗎？

So let's talk about my coming out.

來談談我出櫃的事情吧！

What were you thinking when I came out?

當我出櫃時，當時妳在想什麼？

I wasn't really sure because you had been in a fight with one of your friends and it was causing you a lot of grief.

我有點不太確定，因為妳一直在跟朋友吵架，當時妳非常傷心。

But then what was your reaction when the fight was because I was in love with her?

那當妳發現我們會吵架是因為我們在交往時呢？

All I kept saying in my head was "oh, now that makes sense".

我當時就在腦海裡不斷重複：「現在一切都說得通了。」

Do you, ever have an inkling before that I was gay?

妳當時有沒有看到什麼跡象覺得我是同志？

I was totally clueless.

完全沒有。

Oh, okay.

噢，好吧！

There was that time when you were in high school that I walked in on you and another girl, I can't remember who it was and you guys were sitting in the dark in the living room.

妳高中時，有次我看到妳跟一個女孩一起坐在陰暗的客廳裡。

And I just remember thinking "what the hell are they doing? That's weird".

我記得我當時想說：「她們在幹嘛？很怪欸。」

I'm trying to think if that was that time I was on a date... do you remember of who it was?

我在試著回想當時我是不是在約會...妳記得是誰嗎？

No, I don't think so.

不，我想我不記得了。

That might have been an innocent thing then.

那可能只是一場誤會。

What about the fact that I was very obsessed with a lot of actresses and the Spice Girls and that kind of thing?

那當時我對許多女明星跟辣妹合唱團之類的超級著迷的這件事呢？

Oh, girls growing up look up to women who, you know, they admire and that they want to be like.

噢，女孩們總是會崇拜那些她們想成為的女性。

Did you ever have a moment of relief that I was gay because then I wouldn't get accidentally pregnant?

因為我是同志，也就不會意外懷孕了，妳有因此感到寬心嗎？

No, I never thought of that at all.

不，我從沒這樣想過。

Surprise!

大驚喜！

Have you gotten more or less comfortable over time with gay people or my sexuality in general?

隨著時間經過，妳對同志或我的性向有變成更加或更難接受嗎？

You're talking to the wrong parent.

妳問錯人了。

Remember, I was in the restaurant industry so I was around gay people all the time.

記住，我當時可是在餐飲業工作，所以我身邊總是圍繞著同志。

- That's true. - And they were my favorite people.

- 這倒是真的。 - 而且他們是我最愛的人們。

Did we get closer after I came out?

我出櫃後我們又變得更親密嗎？

I think just in that area we got closer, like, you were more openly asking me about love interests.

我想在感情方面我們更親近了，像是妳變得比較會問我喜歡哪類型的人。

Yes, I wasn't really comfortable asking about any love interest when you're in high school because you didn't seem to be interested in anybody.

對，我當時不太好意思問妳喜歡哪類型的人，因為妳高中時感覺對什麼人都不感興趣。

Except for - - - do you remember - - -?

除了 XXX，妳記得 XXX 嗎？

I do remember - - -. He's gay.

我記得 XXX，他也是同志。

- Get outta here. - Yeah, he's gay now.

- 別鬧了。 - 真的，他是同志。

Do you have any thoughts on how out and proud I am now?

對於我現在完全出櫃與自豪，妳有什麼想法？

I was thinking about this today.

我今天就在想這件事。

I would of course like to see you dating someone.

我當然想看妳找到另一半。

Same.

我也是。

Did you ever have that moment that parents have a concern that it, like, it might be harder for me because I was coming out as gay?

妳有像其他父母一樣擔心說，我身為出櫃女同志生活會比較困難嗎？

At first I didn't think that at all.

一開始我完全沒想到這件事。

I was just happy that you knew that so that you could be happy the rest of your life, and not just tortured the rest of your life.

我只有對妳可能可以幸褔而不是折磨地過下輩子感到開心。

Because things weren't working out for you with men, so yeah, I did.

但因為妳跟男人行不通，所以對，我擔心過。

Well, I was worried you'd get into a situation where you might get beat up or you might, you know, I just wasn't sure.

我擔心過妳可能會被現實擊倒...或...我不確定。

It was upsetting to me, your friends who came out to their parents, and then their parents just kind of disowned them.

妳一些朋友和父母出櫃，然後就被斷絕關係，這讓我感到很傷心。

I could never understand that.

我完全無法了解。

As a parent, I just want you to be happy.

身為一名父母，我只想要妳快樂。

Do you have any advice for parents who might be dealing with their child coming out?

妳有什麼建議要給那些孩子向他們出櫃的父母們嗎？

I can't see that mindset.

我不懂他們的心態。

I just I don't understand that mindset in any way, shape, or form that people would have a problem with it.

我真的不懂為什麼人對於這件事會有問題。

And I think all parents want this is for their kids to be happy.

而且我覺得所有的父母都想要他們的小孩開心。

And if that's the way your child is gonna be happy then you just need to accept that, even if you don't agree with it.

即使不接受，但這是讓孩子開心的方法，你還是得接受。

- Right. - You just need to accept that.

- 對。 - 你就是要接受這個事實。

I am very blessed that, uh, you are very accepting, and very cool with it.

對於妳那麼接受、開明，我感到很幸運。

Did you think I wouldn't be?

我覺得我不會嗎？

I thought that I would be seen as a disappointment in the family.

我以為我會被當成家族之恥。

Okay, you really need to look around.

那妳真的該看看周遭。

You know a lot of people have horror stories about coming out, and thankfully, I had a very supportive bubble in within my family, within my friends.

有許多關於出櫃的可怕故事，幸運地，我有一個由家庭、朋友組成的保護圈。

Because my mom is awesome and I was not seen as a disappointment, so yay!

我媽很讚，而且我沒有被視為家族之恥，所以，耶！