HEE! HEE!

♪ ♪ ♪

Yup. That's me.

Katy, Rihanna and Nicki.

The pop queens with no more Gaga,

She joined the jazz band,

After she lost all that weight of course.

Okay, I'm gettin' a head of myself,

We all know how the story ends,

But let me start at the beginning.

Are you ready?

♪ OHH... ♪

♪ CELEBRITIES ARE REALLY CRUEL... ♪

♪ WHAT IF THEY WERE INSIDE A SCHOOL?... ♪

♪ WOULDN'T THAT BE SO COOL?... ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH... ♪

♪ IF YOU WANT TO HANG WITH THE POP QUEENS THEN... ♪

♪ JUST FORGET IT, YEAH... ♪

♪ THEY'RE TOO POPULAR ♪

♪ TOO HIGH ON THE CHARTS ♪

♪ AND TOO, REMEMBER THEM ♪

♪ SLAYING YOUR FACE ♪

♪ ON THE RED CARPET, YEAH... ♪

I'm Taylor Swift, and I just moved here from Tennessee.

I recorded the country album which did okay but,

I want to explore my artistry.

We moved to Hollywood, California so I can attend Super Star High!

This is my mom, Dolly Parton. She got double Zs...

Truthfully, I could use some of those in my ass...

Baby, _____________________________________________________.

And remember what I've always told you, act fake and innocent.

It'll get you to the top.

Alright mom.

You don't wanna sit there. He farts a lot..

They don't want...

*farts*

The farts...

This is where I met Kesha and Paris Hilton.

My new besties~

And the only people who honest to me.

I never did live in a world who people didn't like me.

*annoying unrecognized nagging*

Damn __________, your skin is pale AF homes

How you doin'?

Uhh...

You're not doing it too good, honey.

You look like an ugly ass G.Rag...

*laughs*

I have a lot of friends on Tennessee, but so far none on Hollywood.

Yoo!... Iz diz lunj lek or wat mah ji?

Yoo WTF do you said?

TAYLOR!

Hey! Quick question..

Hm?

Would you like for someone to saucy your taco?

What?

Would you like to Netflix and chill?

Justin, she's just not into you.

So why don't you take care of your lesbian looking haircut and work on hitting puberty?

Ugh, what a bitch...

Hey wait... Sit down.

This is where Gaga and friends invited me to..

Have lunch with us for the rest of the years!

You should just know that we don't usually do this..

But since we have a rap queen, reggae queen, pop princess and pop queen,

we need a country girl.

No thanks. Actually..

Great. So its official.

Everyday, we wear pink.

I love your bracelet, where did you get it?

I don't know.

Here, hit this blunt.

What is that?

OMG, your jacket is so flick!

What is flick?

Its like slang, from the ghetto.

Okay, can only wear ___________, Marc Jacobs, Fendi and Versace.

No Gucci. Only M.A.C cosmetics because they sponsor to wear around the school.

And you have to post at least 3 _________________________ on Instagram.

*sigh*

OMG look how cute I _____.

Mommy, you always have that dopey look on your face.

OMG, you have to do it and tell us all the dumb stuff Gaga said.

OMG yes queen.

And we can publish all the ____ in the school PMZ paper.

On the shifts, I DON'T KNOW!

Why do you hater?

Gaga accused me of ripping off her style in middle school.

Well, you do kinda look like her with that makeup, glitter, crazy costumes.

Ouh yeah..?

F**k

Yeah can you ask Nicki what eyeshadow she uses is?