Name: 川普開戰伊朗引爆驚天油價危機！竟還在超詭異造勢大會上宣佈勝利？深入解析 (Trump’s Iran War Sparks Massive Oil Crisis as He Declares Victory at Bizarre Rally: A Closer Look)
Uploaded: 2026-03-15T21:41:09.000Z
Duration: 11 min 38 s

Republicans say the Iran war is both a short excursion and a longer war, and

共和黨員說，伊朗戰爭既是短暫的交鋒，也是長期的戰爭，

程度副詞

it's pretty much complete, and it's also just beginning.

而且幾乎已經結束，同時也才剛開始。

And high oil prices are a sacrifice we have to make.

而高油價是我們必須付出的代價。

And also high oil prices are actually a good thing, and we already won.

而且高油價其實是好事，我們已經贏了。

But we might have to stay for four days or five weeks or six months to open the Strait of Hormuz for oil tankers, because if it stays closed, oil prices that are coming down will go up and we'll lose the war we've already won.

但我們可能得待上四天、五週或六個月來為油輪打通荷姆茲海峽，因為如果它關閉，正在下降的油價就會上漲，我們就會輸掉已經贏得的戰爭。

For more on this, it's time for a closer look.

更多相關資訊，是時候深入探討了。

A majority of Americans say the Trump administration has not clearly explained the goal of war with Iran.

大多數美國人認為川普政府沒有清楚說明與伊朗開戰的目標。

But that's frustrating to me because it just proves you haven't been listening.

但這讓我很沮喪，因為這證明你們根本沒在聽。

The Trump administration has been clear from the beginning that the goal of the war is stopping Iran from obtaining a nuclear weapon.

川普政府從一開始就很清楚，戰爭的目標是阻止伊朗取得核武。

Or it's about regime change, or it's about freedom for the Iranian people.

或者，這是為了政權更迭，或是為了伊朗人民的自由。

Or it's about destroying their ballistic missile factories.

或者，這是為了摧毀他們的彈道飛彈工廠。

Or it's because Iran posed an imminent threat.

或者，這是因為伊朗構成迫在眉睫的威脅。

或者，這是因為以色列逼我們這麼做。

Or it's because this whole time, Lindsey Graham has been a trickster God sent here to sow chaos by convincing Trump to go to war.

或者，這是因為這段時間以來，林賽·葛蘭姆一直扮演著惡作劇之神的角色，他讓川普相信要開戰，藉此散播混亂。

I've been a Loki this whole time, And my meemaw's a frost giant.

我一直都是洛基，而我奶奶是霜巨人。

He's just a waiter walking around the party offering hors d'.

他就像個服務生在派對上端著點心到處走。

It tastes the same, but the sleeves make it look disconcerting.

味道一樣，但袖子讓它看起來有點令人不安。

Everyone's been harping on the man, asking him boring questions like, how long is this war going to take?

大家都在煩他，問他無聊的問題，像是這場戰爭要打多久？

He's giving you a bunch of different options.

He told Axios this war could end in two to three days with a deal.

他告訴 Axios，這場戰爭可以在兩三天內達成協議結束。

Then he told the New York Times, four to five weeks of fighting.

然後他又告訴紐約時報，可能會打個四到五週。

Politico now reports the State Department is thinking at least 100 days, maybe even through September.

Politico 現在報導說，國務院認為至少要一百天，甚至可能拖到九月。

So it could last two to three days, or it could last four to five weeks, or it could last until September.

所以，可能兩三天就結束，也可能打四五週，或者一直打到九月。

You sound like my doctor after I ate a bottle of knockoff Viagra.

你聽起來就像我吃了瓶假威而鋼之後，我醫生的樣子。

Could be a couple of hours, it could be a year.

But on the bright side, you Won't have to put down your groceries to open the door.

不過好消息是，你開門的時候不用放下你的購物袋。

So the President is letting you choose your own adventure when it comes to how long this war will take.

所以總統讓你自行決定這場戰爭要打多久。

But if you really want to be a stick in the mud and demand an answer, here you go.

但如果你真的想當個掃興鬼，非要個答案，那給你。

Just moments ago, President Donald Trump told CBS this, quote, I think the war is very complete.

就在剛才，川普總統告訴CBS說，引述，「我認為這場戰爭已經非常完整了。」

Pretty much don't use very, and then pretty much right after it because they contradict each other.

「Pretty much」這個詞，盡量不要跟「very」一起用，因為它們意思會互相矛盾。

If your friend wanted to set you up on a date and you said, is he hot?

如果你的朋友想幫你介紹對象，你問她「他帥不帥？」

然後她回答「非常帥」，你會很興奮。

And if she says pretty much, you're gonna have some follow ups.

但如果她說「差不多」，你就會想追問。

But there you have it for you whiny crybabies demanding answers.

好了，給那些愛抱怨、吵著要答案的你們。

The President said it, the war is very complete, which I assume means we'll be wrapping this baby up any day now.

總統說了，這場戰爭「非常完整」，我猜這表示我們很快就會結束這場戰事了。

What I want your viewers to understand is this is only just the beginning.

我想讓觀眾瞭解的是，這才只是個開始。

I will admit it's not great that the guy who runs the Pentagon sounds like the Joker after he gets arrested.

我得承認，五角大廈的首長聽起來像被捕後的小丑，這點不太好。

All right, so there's a little confusion, a little crosstalk, some mixed messages.

好了，所以有點小混亂，有點雞同鴨講，訊息有點混亂。

I'm sure the commander in chief can clear this up.

我相信三軍統帥能釐清這件事。

President, you've said the war is, quote, very complete, but

您說這場戰爭「非常完整」，但

your defense secretary says this is just the beginning.

您的國防部長卻說這才只是個開始。

So, what, suddenly you're into Eastern philosophy?

所以，怎麼了，你突然對東方哲學感興趣了？

We exist in a space between nothing and everything.

我們存在於虛無與萬物之間的空間。

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a meeting with Walton Goggins.

現在，請原諒我，我要去見 Walton Goggins 了。

All right, so the war is both beginning and ending.

好的，所以這場戰爭既是開始也是結束。

But don't worry, the President is a genius marketer and he has a new word to describe the war that will put any questions about the timeline and the seriousness of the missions to rest.

但別擔心，總統是個行銷天才，他有個新詞來形容這場戰爭，任何關於時間表和任務嚴肅性的疑問都會煙消雲散。

We had to take a little trip to get rid of some evil, very evil people.

我們得去一趟，把一些邪惡、非常邪惡的人除掉。

Well, we're looking to keep the oil prices down.

嗯，我們希望油價能維持在低點。

We went artificially up because of this excursion into a very positive thing.

因為這次遠足，我們人為地推升了，變成一件非常正面的事。

I mean, this was an excursion that a lot of people wouldn't have done.

我覺得，這是一次很多人都不會去做的遠足。

I mean, I think I know what happened here.

我想，我大概知道這裡發生了什麼事。

Trump was calling it a war, which is very unpopular, so someone on his team told him to call it an incursion.

川普稱之為戰爭，這很不受歡迎，所以他團隊裡有人建議他稱之為「incursion」。

But his brain is oatmeal, so he heard excursion, and no one corrected him.

但他的腦袋像燕麥粥一樣，所以他聽成了「excursion」，而且沒人糾正他。

Did you see it on a brochure at the rental car place?

你是在租車櫃檯的旅遊手冊上看到的嗎？

Between snorkeling and cave tours, A war is not an excursion.

浮潛和洞穴導覽之間，戰爭不是遠足。

An excursion is apple picking, which we all know is worse than a war.

遠足就像採蘋果，而我們都知道那比戰爭還糟。

An excursion when you go whale watching in the Bahamas or when you take a boat trip to Epstein's island, which he didn't do.

遠足就像去巴哈馬看鯨魚，或是搭船去艾普斯坦的島，但他沒有去。

In the over 5,000 Epstein files that referenced Donald Trump, not one of them said he went to the island.

在超過五千份提到唐納·川普的艾普斯坦檔案中，沒有一份說他去過那個島。

All he did was fly on Epstein's plane eight times and called him a terrific guy and sent him a lewd birthday card.

他只是搭了八次艾普斯坦的飛機，稱他為很棒的人，還送他一張淫穢的生日卡。

And Epstein called him his closest friend for 10 years, and they partied together at Mar a Lago.

艾普斯坦還稱他為十年來最親密的朋友，他們在海湖莊園一起開派對。

Can you show the footage approved by the doj?

你可以播放司法部準許的畫面嗎？

Point is, the President says it's just an excursion.

重點是，總統說這只是一次遠足。

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川普開戰伊朗引爆驚天油價危機！竟還在超詭異造勢大會上宣佈勝利？深入解析 (Trump’s Iran War Sparks Massive Oil Crisis as He Declares Victory at Bizarre Rally: A Closer Look)

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