Name: 川普：ICE殺人事件製造壞名聲 | 美國的祕密武器 | 愛潑斯坦的瑪芬食譜 (Trump: ICE Killings Create Bad Publicity | America's Secret Weapon | Epstein's Muffin Recipe)
Uploaded: 2026-02-08T17:20:49.000Z
Duration: 11 min 46 s

Welcome, welcome, one and all, to the Late Show.

I'm your host, Stephen Colbert, Ladies and gentlemen.

我是你們的主持人，Stephen Colbert，各位觀眾。

Down in D.C. this morning, they held the annual National Prayer Breakfast.

今天早上在 D.C.，他們舉辦了年度全國祈禱早餐會。

It's been going on for a long time, since we were kids.

這已經辦很久了，從我們小時候就有了。

All the politicians show up and it seems fine.

所有的政治人物都會出現，看起來都還好。

But frankly, I've always been uncomfortable with it because as American, I believe in the separation of church and breakfast.

但老實說，我一直對這件事感到有點不自在，因為身為美國人，我相信政教分離，而不是政教早餐分離。

教會，然後是甜甜圈和難喝的咖啡。

Now, Trump, of course, President Trump was down there this morning.

現在，川普，當然了，川普總統今天早上也在那裡。

Did some special material just for the prayer munchers.

為那些祈禱的吃貨們準備了一些特別的內容。

I think I've been here just about every time.

I don't have the courage to turn it down.

Last time I came, I got in at 4 in the morning.

上次我來的時候，我凌晨四點才到。

They said, sir, you're going to be speaking at 7.

他們說，先生，您要在七點演講。

Thank you for your attention to this platter.

Before he got on stage, Trump was introduced by his spiritual advisor and haunted Bloomingdale's mannequin Paula White Kane.

在川普上臺前，介紹他的是他的心靈導師，也是在梅西百貨鬧鬼的假人寶拉·懷特·凱恩。

I think I can say this not as senior advisor, but

我想我能這麼說，不是以資深顧問的身分，而是

as his friend, the goat, the greatest of all time.

以他朋友的身分，這位史上最偉大的傳奇人物。

現在，我不是一位受戒牧師，但

as a Christian, I thought the greatest of all time was the guy named Jesus.

身為基督徒，我認為史上最偉大的是耶穌。

Still, I mean, you have to admit, still holds the record for saves.

不過，我必須承認，他仍然保有最多救援紀錄。

But I will agree that Trump is the goat because I believe he would eat a bicycle tire if he put it on a bun.

但我同意川普是史上最偉大，因為我相信如果他把腳踏車輪胎夾在麵包裡，他會吃下去。

And just because we're talking about Paula White Cane, I am legally obligated to show you this clip of her preaching in tongues.

而且既然我們在談論寶拉·懷特·凱恩，我依法必須給你們看一段她說靈語的影片。

Can we play a little bit more of that footage?

我們可以再多看一點那段影片嗎？

And then while Trump was all in on the prayer breakfast, he was less enthusiastic about other prayer meals.

然後當川普全心投入祈禱早餐時，他對其他祈禱餐會就沒那麼熱衷了。

Mike Johnson's a very religious person, and he does not hide it.

麥克·強森是個非常虔誠的人，他從不避諱。

He'll say to me sometimes at lunch, sir, may we pray?

他有時午餐時會對我說，長官，我們可以禱告嗎？

When people see you eat, a lot of people just start praying.

當大家看到你吃飯時，很多人就會開始禱告。

So Trump sat down with Tom Yamas on NBC for the traditional pre.

所以川普在 NBC 接受 Tom Yamas 的傳統賽前訪問。

Speaking of Minneapolis, what did you learn?

說到明尼亞波利斯，你學到什麼？

I learned that maybe we can use a little bit of a softer touch.

我學到的是，也許我們可以稍微溫和一點。

You think it's like that quote from Godzilla?

你覺得就像哥吉拉那句名言嗎？

Then Yamas asked about the tragic deaths of Renee Goode and Alex Preddy.

然後 Yamas 問起 Renee Goode 和 Alex Preddy 的悲慘死訊。

嗯，至少你們是異口同聲地噓。

Even among the people who, like you, remember how much money General Mills lost when Sonny Cuckoo went criminally insane for Cocoa Puffs?

即使是那些跟你一樣，還記得通用磨坊（General Mills）因為桑尼咕咕（Sonny Cuckoo）為了可可脆片（Cocoa Puffs）而精神失常損失了多少錢的人，

They still haven't found Snap, Crackle or Pops bodies.

他們還是沒找到 Snap、Crackle 或 Pop 的屍體。

Don't really know what that joke means, but I enjoyed it.

其實不太懂那個笑話是什麼意思，但我喜歡。

No idea what that joke means, but I enjoyed it.

Despite the footage we just showed you, Trump bragged about the cognitive and defended his brain.

雖然我們剛才給你看了一些畫面，川普卻誇口自己的認知能力，還為自己的腦袋辯護。

I take physicals just to give the report out.

我做身體檢查只是為了發布報告。

Yeah, I take cognitive physicals, so I do a cognitive mind test.

對，我會做認知體檢，所以我會做一個認知心智測驗。

No other president has agreed to do them.

I do them because I have no problem with it.

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川普：ICE殺人事件製造壞名聲 | 美國的祕密武器 | 愛潑斯坦的瑪芬食譜 (Trump: ICE Killings Create Bad Publicity | America's Secret Weapon | Epstein's Muffin Recipe)

weird

cognitive

ultimate

apparently