Name: 達文西DNA、雪車慘案、百顆失竊頭顱、日本最尊貴的貓！ (Meanwhile... da Vinci DNA | Bungled Bobsled | 100 Stolen Skulls | Japan's Most Distinguished Cat)
Uploaded: 2026-01-13T17:30:42.000Z
Duration: 5 min 39 s

Give it up for Louis Cato and the band, everybody.

各位，為 Louis Cato 和樂團鼓掌！

這是為了 Bob 點燃的山上小火苗。

And the Grateful Dead, who we're lucky enough to have on the show.

還有 Grateful Dead，我們很幸運他們能來到節目。

You know, tonight in just a few moments, I will be giving the Colbert questionnaire to Mr.

你知道，今晚幾分鐘後，我就要讓 Kimmel 先生來填寫 Colbert questionnaire。

We'll be, actually, I'll be administering it.

And then we'll be joined by Virginia governor elect Abigail Spanberger talking about Virginia, talking about international affairs.

然後我們會和即將就任的維吉尼亞州州長 Abigail Spanberger 一起聊維吉尼亞，聊國際事務。

I hope you do, then you know, I spend most of my time over there in the news workshop, carefully stringing the most topical glass story beads and semi precious stones onto premium nylon threading before adding brass components and hand embellished with leather backing to create the elegant and playful Dipo Gornani Gloriosa luxe hairband.

我希望你有看，那你應該知道，我大部分時間都在新聞工作室，小心地將最熱門的玻璃故事珠子和半寶石串在高級尼龍線上，然後加上黃銅零件，並手工裝飾皮革背襯，以打造出優雅又俏皮的 Dipo Gornani Gloriosa luxe hairband。

I mean just sometime after stealing cocaine from a racehorse, I hide inside a tree stump where I wrap a boot lace around a chunk of discarded coaxial cable and then use it to coil my hair into a top knot using the gutter scrunchie of news.

我是說，在從賽馬身上偷走古柯鹼之後，我會躲在樹樁裡，用鞋帶纏繞一塊廢棄的同軸電纜，然後用它來綁頭髮，做出新聞裡那種隨便的髮髻。

這對一個飽受困擾的國家來說是個好消息。

Meanwhile, in genome news, scientists have retrieved DNA that could belong to Leonardo da Vinci.

同時，在 genome news 中，科學家們找回了可能屬於 Leonardo da Vinci 的 DNA。

That makes for a weirdly non committal announcement, ladies and gentlemen.

各位，這聽起來像個不太確定的宣佈。

We have recovered DNA that could be from Leonardo da Vinci.

我們找回了可能來自 Leonardo da Vinci 的 DNA。

Also could be from his cousin Keith Da Vinci or.

也可能是他表哥 Keith Da Vinci 的，或是

Meanwhile, the U.S. bobsled team was competing at the World cup in St.

同時，U.S. bobsled team 週日在 St. Moritz 瑞士參加 World cup 比賽，其中一次的滑行表現不太理想。

Moritz, Switzerland on Sunday and one of their runs didn't go so great.

幸好沒人受傷，所以我們來開心地看這段精彩畫面。

No one was hurt, which is why we're going to enjoy the bonus fun of watching it.

關於這個故事，我有一個獨特的視角，因為早在 2009 年，我就和 US Olympic Bobsled Team 一起訓練過。

Now, I have a unique perspective on this story because back in 2009 I trained with the US Olympic Bobsled Team.

You can pick me out because three of these guys look like Olympic athletes and one looks like your mom's friend Joanne Yvonne.

你可以認出我，因為這三個人看起來像奧運選手，而有一個像你媽媽的朋友 Joanne Yvonne。

放我，放他們看我是怎麼做的。

That was 16 years ago and my testicles have almost redescended.

那已經是 16 年前的事了，我的睪丸幾乎都快掉下來了。

Meanwhile, over 100 human skulls were found at the home of a Pennsylvania man accused of desecrating cemeteries.

同時，賓夕法尼亞州一名男子被控褻瀆墓地，在他的住家發現了超過 100 個頭骨。

Oh, there's been a rash of graves, missing skulls, and

喔，最近發生好多墳墓被挖、頭骨失竊的事件，

someone happens to have 100 skulls in their house.

然後剛好有人家裡有 100 個頭骨。

所以你就直接假設是他偷的嗎？

America used to have a justice system you could believe in.

以前的美國還有一個你能夠相信的司法體系。

Does this look like the face of a man who could have stolen 100 skulls?

這看起來像是一個會偷 100 個頭骨的男人的臉嗎？

Meanwhile, continuing a quirky tradition where they give animals honorary titles, a Japanese railway station just named its new station master a calico cat named Yontama.

同時，延續一項特別的傳統，他們會給動物榮譽頭銜，日本一個火車站最近任命了一隻名叫 Yontama 的三花貓為牠們的新站長。

Not to be outdone, New York's Penn station continues to be led by a rat who was me tooed.

為了不落人後，紐約的 Penn station 則繼續由一隻被指控「me too」的老鼠領導。

Meanwhile, 50 sheep broke away from the flock and stormed a German supermarket.

同時，有 50 隻羊脫離羊群，衝進一家德國超市。

A cashier tried to stop them, but fell asleep watching them come in.

一名收銀員試圖阻止牠們，結果在看牠們進來時睡著了。

According to study, we emit a visible light that vanishes when we die.

研究顯示，我們死後會發出可見的光，但光也會隨之消失。

It also vanishes when someone says, I'm going to send you my self published novel.

當有人說「我要寄我的自費出版小說給你」時，這光也會消失。

We'll be right back with Jimmy Kimmel and the Colbert questionnaire.

廣告回來後，我們要請到 Jimmy Kimmel 和 Colbert questionnaire。

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達文西DNA、雪車慘案、百顆失竊頭顱、日本最尊貴的貓！ (Meanwhile... da Vinci DNA | Bungled Bobsled | 100 Stolen Skulls | Japan's Most Distinguished Cat)

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