Name: 沒朋友是種病徵？— 喬登·彼得森 (A Lack of Friends Is a Symptom of… - Jordan Peterson)
Uploaded: 2025-12-27T04:28:39.000Z
Duration: 7 min 10 s

One of the things that I've realized is that people that are self reflective, that rely on cerebral horsepower, that pay attention, that think in a detailed way, the more nuanced that you're thinking is, the fewer people are going to be like you, which makes you feel more alone.

我發現，那些善於反思、依靠腦力、專注思考、想法越細緻的人，會發現跟你一樣的人越少，這會讓你感覺更孤單。

How do you think people can overcome this?

你覺得大家要怎麼克服這個情況呢？

情態副詞

Well, I would say that hasn't been my experience exactly because as I started to make my thoughts more public, they seem to appeal to more and more people.

嗯，我會說這跟我自己的經驗不太一樣，因為當我開始公開我的想法後，越來越多人似乎都喜歡。

And so I don't know if that's a threshold phenomena, because maybe it is.

所以我不知道這是不是一種閾值現象，也許是吧。

You know, as you start to become specialized as a scientist, in some sense, your vision narrows and narrows, although it gets more high resolution at the level that you're operating, but

你知道，當你開始成為一個專業的科學家時，某種程度上，你的視野會越來越窄，雖然在你操作的層級上解析度會更高，但

you kind of pass through a needle, let's say, out the other side, where the thing you're studying starts to become everything again.

你就像穿過針眼一樣，假設是這樣，然後來到另一邊，你研究的東西又開始變成一切了。

And so maybe that's, maybe that's that developmental progression.

所以也許這就是，也許這就是那個發展進程。

Yeah, specialization and then generalization again.

對，專業化，然後又回到概括化。

Yeah, I think that you might be right there.

The deeper into the breach thing, the show that I went to go and see you do in Manchester in 2017 or 18, someone asked a question about the depth of my consciousness, causes me to suffer.

越深入那個破壞性事物，就像我在 2017 或 18 年在曼徹斯特看的那場表演，有人問到關於我的意識深度，這讓我感到痛苦。

And you said you take more of the thing that poisons you until you turn it into a tonic that girdles the world around you.

你說你會更深入地去了解那些讓你痛苦的事物，直到你將它們轉化成環繞著你的補品。

And I think that this is something you see here as well, that when you start to think differently, when you start to consider the way that you're living your life in a more detailed, higher resolution, more unique, more nuanced way, you will probably receive pushback.

我認為這在這裡也看得到，當你開始用更細緻、更高解析度、更獨特、更細膩的方式思考，去思考你的生活方式時，你可能會遇到反對聲浪。

Especially, you know, speaking from personal experience, in a normal working class towns, people born, live, die in these places.

尤其，從個人經驗來說，在一般的工人階級城鎮，人們出生、成長、然後在那裡死去。

There isn't a huge culture of, especially in the uk, Tall Poppy syndrome is a huge problem.

尤其在英國，並沒有那種鼓勵的文化，矮化症是一個大問題。

The biggest difference that I've noticed actually between American people and English people is that American children are told that they can be anything that they want to be.

我注意到美國人和英國人最大的不同是，美國小孩被告知他們可以成為任何他們想成為的人。

They're told that they have blue sky vision, they can achieve whatever they want.

他們被告知他們有藍天視野，他們可以達成任何他們想要的。

When us Brits, stuffy, stiffer polit Brits see Americans on tv, it sounds like everyone's had media training because everybody's just so enthused about whatever it is, even if it's a 18 car pileup and then the equivalent in the UK is that deviating from the norm is very, very, very quickly mocked.

我們英國人，那些拘謹、更加僵化的英國人，在電視上看到美國人時，聽起來就像每個人都受過媒體訓練，因為每個人都對他們正在做的事充滿熱情，即使是連環車禍，而在英國，偏離常規的行為會非常、非常、非常快地被嘲笑。

Now, the Japanese have that saying, too, except it's the nail that sticks up above all.

現在，日本人也有類似的說法，只是變成「出頭的釘子」。

The rest is the first one to be struck down by the hammer.

There's some truth in that, but some and all are very different words.

這其中有些道理，但「一些」和「所有」是截然不同的詞。

When you roll the clock forward, what you end up with is American children that then become adults who look around at the world and say, well, hang on, this wasn't what I was promised.

當你把時間往前推，結果就是美國小孩長大成人後，環顧世界並說：「等等，這不是我被承諾的。」

I was told that I could be anything that I wanted to be.

我被告知我可以成為任何我想成為的人。

I was told that I could have anything that I wanted to have.

我被告知我可以擁有任何我想擁有的東西。

There's a difference between you can earn everything that is earnable, and you deserve everything there is.

「你能賺到所有可賺到的東西」和「你應得所有存在的一切」之間是有差別的。

所以這個訊息就會變成你說的話。

It can become misinterpreted in a narcissistic manner.

它可能會被誤解成一種自戀的態度。

And I think that has happened to some degree, especially as people have had fewer and fewer children.

我認為這在某種程度上確實發生了，特別是隨著人們生越來越少的小孩。

You know, Jonathan Haidt and Luke Yanauf talk about the coddling of the American mind, and

你知道，Jonathan Haidt 和 Luke Yanauf 談到了「美國心靈的過度呵護」，

they think about that in large part as a consequence of an ideological transformation.

他們認為這很大程度上是意識形態轉變的結果。

And some of that's true, but it's also useful to look at more fundamental phenomena.

其中有些道理沒錯，但檢視更根本的現象也很有用。

People have children when they're a lot older.

They have way more resources when they have children.

他們生孩子時擁有的資源也多很多。

On average, you know, if you're one kid of eight, you're pretty much battling it out for attention for a very finite amount of parental attention with a lot of intense competition.

平均來說，如果你是八個小孩中的一個，你得為了父母有限的關注而跟很多兄弟姊妹激烈競爭。

And the probability that you're going to come out of that entitled and narcissistic is pretty damn low because your siblings will definitely punish you for that.

你不太可能是以變得自以為是或自戀，因為你的兄弟姊妹肯定會讓你吃盡苦頭。

But if you're the only child, especially of older parents, who are also more conservative because of their age and also less willing to take chances with you because there's only one of you, and

但如果你是獨生子女，尤其是父母年紀較大，他們因為年齡而比較保守，而且因為只有你一個，他們也不太敢冒險，

then you have a lot of resources at your disposal.

這樣你就有非常多的資源可用。

That's a whole different developmental milieu, and we have no idea what the consequences of that are.

這是一個完全不同的發展環境，而我們對其後果毫無頭緒。

But the idea that children in that circumstance are more likely to be overprotected and dependent and structured, it's like, well, yeah, undoubtedly, you know, that would even be an overabundance of parental virtue in some sense, Right?

但認為在這種情況下的孩子更有可能被過度保護、依賴和被安排好一切，這聽起來，嗯，沒錯，無疑是這樣，這在某種程度上甚至可以說是過多的父母美德，對吧？

Well, we just did nothing but pay attention to our child.

嗯，我們就是無時無刻都在關注我們的孩子。

It's so strange because I'm an only child, right?

我是獨生女，所以感覺很奇怪，對吧？

What maybe my friends might say differently, but

或許我的朋友會有不同的說法，但

a lot of the commonly held presumptions around only children, I just.

關於獨生子女的許多普遍假設，我就是。

And I Have a couple of friends who are as well.

And I don't know whether it's where we're from that the northeast of the UK is very spit and sawdust.

我不知道是不是因為我們來自英國東北部，那裡非常樸實。

It's, you know, grab your bootstraps and your boots and start pulling.

你知道，就是自己努力奮鬥，然後開始行動。

What, what is it through your clinical practice might not be a primarily working class phenomena, you know, the coddled mind phenomena.

在你的臨床實踐中，這是不是主要不是一個工人階級的現象，你知道的，這種被嬌縱的心智現象。

That could easily be a middle class and upper phenomena.

Was there a common trend or from your reading, have you found that only children tend to be one way or another?

你有沒有發現，從你的閱讀中，獨生子女傾向於這樣或那樣，有沒有一個普遍的趨勢？

So you just get huge variance in them as well?

At the level of individual psychological data, there might be a literature, I'm not aware of it, that for me, that was more a response to Haidt's book on the coddled mind.

在個人心理數據的層面上，或許有相關的文獻，但我不知道，對我來說，那更多是對海特的《被嬌縱的心智》這本書的回應。

這是一個巨大的人口結構轉變。

It's a huge transformation in the way we raise children.

這是在我們養育孩子方式上的巨大轉變。

We're 10 years older when we have our children now.

我們現在生孩子的時候，年紀都大了十歲。

You know, when you're 18, you have a kid, you're still a kid.

你知道，十八歲生小孩，你還是個小孩。

And there's some wildness that's perhaps not so good about that.

而那種狂野，或許不是那麼好。

But there's also perhaps a higher proclivity to go off and live your own life.

但或許也有比較高的傾向，可以出去過自己的人生。

And then, you know, how much children, how much should your children be left on their own?

然後，你知道，孩子們，你的孩子應該有多少時間是自己待著？

答案是，盡可能讓他們自己待著。

Well, you find out with each child, but it's certainly possible to not deprive your child enough.

嗯，這點你得看著每個孩子來決定，但絕對有可能會剝奪孩子們足夠的獨處時間。

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