Yeah, it almost looks as good as mom's

對啊，看起來快跟媽媽煮的一樣好吃

Stephanie! Carol worked extremely hard on this

Stephanie! Carol 花很多心思在這上面

Oh, this is? I just threw together a simple recipe

喔，這只是—我只是隨便弄一弄

This is almost perfect. If only Kyle could've made it home for Christmas this year

差一點點就完美了。如果 Kyle 今年有辦法回家過聖誕節有多好

Merry Christmas, Dad

聖誕快樂，老爸

Kyle! What a Christmas miracle!

Kyle! 這真是個聖誕奇蹟！

Anything for you, Dad

我願意為你做任何事，爸

Can we go a different route or something?

我們可不可以走別條路？

Why are you even going down this street? The street is terrible this time of day!

你為什麼要走這條路？這條每到這時候就很塞

Can you double time it? Can we just get a little faster, man?

可不可以收我兩倍的錢？開快一點嘛，老兄

I'm kind of late for a flight right now

我現在快趕不上飛機了

Literally fifteen minutes! I'm stressing out!

十五分鐘！我現在非常焦慮！

Have you ever tried to check through security during the holidays?

你有沒有嘗試在聖誕假期期間做登機安檢？

It's just freaking nuts! Can you turn up the AC?

簡直瘋了！可不可以把冷氣調冷一點？

Okay, remember, we can't bring up the Asian thing

好，記住，我們不能提到他是亞洲人這件事

What Asian thing? Can't I say Asian in my own home?

什麼亞洲人？難道我不能在我家說「亞洲人」嗎？

So James, I had some Thai food the other day. It was to "Thai" for!

James，我前幾天吃泰國菜。真是太美味了！（to Thai for 是 to die for 的諧音）

My dad, he's not a racist but he might tell like a bad joke or two

我爸爸不會種族歧視，但他可能會講一兩個爛笑話

Wait, what?

等等，什麼？

Don't worry about it. Just ignore him...Dad! Daddy!

不用擔心。就不要理他...爸！爸爸！

I'm Chinese, but I do love Thai food

我是中國人，但我的確蠻愛泰國菜的

And we like Chinese food too

我們也愛中國菜

Oh yes, yes. Maybe you could cook some for us

喔對，對。也許你可以煮一點給我們吃

Okay Carol, we're done

夠了，Carol

Don't they all cook?

他們不都會做菜嗎？

I'm sure Chinese people cook

我確定中國人會做菜

I don't know much about him. I just met him also so...

我對他瞭解不多。我也是剛剛才認識他

All righty then. We normally do Christmas presents after dinner, but I just can't help myself

好囉！我們通常都在飯後開聖誕禮物，但我實在是忍不住

Woah, the new gPhone 67S! Dad!

哇，最新的 gPhone 67S 耶！老爸！

Oh my gosh! Thank you so much, daddy!

天啊！真謝謝你，爸爸！

How did you get this? They're sold out everywhere!

你怎麼買到的？這到處都缺貨耶！

A magician never reveals his secrets

一個好魔術師不會傻到揭露魔術手法

My son first!

我兒子優先！

Well, anything for my kids

為了我的孩子，我什麼都願意

Ho ho ho!

It's Santa everybody. It's not your brother, the big disappointment, Greg.

嘿大家，是聖誕老公公！是你那令人失望的弟弟，Greg

Johnny, look, I know this has been a hard year for you with the divorce and everything

Johnny，你聽我說，我知道你今年過得不太好，因為離婚還有什麼的

But I think for Christmas, we're just gonna do our family.

但我認為今年聖誕節，我們家會自己過

I hope you understand.

希望你能諒解

Oh yeah. Merry Christmas. Nobody loves Johnny.

喔好。聖誕快樂。沒人愛 Johnny

But everyone loves Santa!

但大家都愛聖誕老公公！

I'm just saying we should give Trump a chance!

我只是說我們應該給川普一個機會

Okay, I think it's time to take our family Christmas picture

好，我認為是時候拍聖誕節家庭合照了

Great idea!

好主意！

The family's all here

我們家人全都到齊了

James, get in the picture

James，來一起拍

No, no. I don't think James should be in the picture

不，不。我認為 James 不該跟我們一起拍

Daddy, that's not fair!

爸爸，這不公平！

It is fair! This is a family picture. James is not family

公平啊！這是家庭合照。James 又不是家人

Oh my God, that's so rude!

天啊，有夠失禮！

Well, I'm not family yet, but I was hoping to change that tonight

我還不能算是家人，但我想在今晚改變這件事

Oh God!

天啊

Steph, will you marry me?

Steph，你願意嫁給我嗎？

Absolutely not!

當然不願意！

Daddy! What do you think you're doing?

爸爸！你在幹嘛？

You hardly know him!

妳幾乎不認識他！

You barely knew Carol when you married her!

你娶 Carol 的時候也幾乎不認識她啊！