Name: 超俏皮！貓咪想對人類說的真心話 A Cat's Guide To Taking Care Of Your Human
Uploaded: 2022-02-25T21:01:10.000Z
Duration: 2 min

轉承詞

Despite being huge and having the ability to open canned goods, humans are frail in both body and mind and we must care for them.

雖然人類如此高大，而且還會開罐頭，但他們的身心靈都很脆弱，所以我們必須好好照顧他們。

Perhaps from ennui, or malaise, humans often stare at random, inanimate objects for hours at a time.

可能是因為無聊或是心神不寧，人類經常每次都花好幾個小時凝視著任意且無生命的物品。

Your duty is to break this spell, to remind them that there is life out there to live.

你的任務就是打破這個魔咒，提醒他們生活不只是如此。

Perhaps the worst offender of these objects is the "light box".

最大的敵人可能就是那些「會發光的盒子」了。

You must remind them that boxes don't need light.

你一定要提醒他們，盒子根本就不需要光。

You just need the light of your imagination.

And now I'm a rocket ship and the box is the astronaut.

現在我變成了火箭，而盒子變成了太空人。

They insist on using water bowls that are too narrow for their heads, which means they cannot drink in the civilized fashion with your face and your tongue.

人類堅持使用塞不進頭的瘦長水杯，這樣一來，他們就不能用臉和舌頭，文明的方式喝水了。

Speaking of tongues, humans don't seem to use theirs for anything.

說到舌頭，人類好像不太會使用舌頭做事。

You must lick them every morning and remind them that a tongue is a terrible thing to waste.

你必須每天早上舔醒他們，提醒他們，不使用舌頭是巨大的損失。

我不知道他們要如何保持個人衛生。

Besides that cute little tuft on their heads, humans are, for the most part, sadly hairless.

人類除了頭上那一小撮頭髮，大部分的身體都沒有毛。

During the day, they cover themselves with little body blankets.

在白天，他們只能用單薄的衣服包住自己。

You must donate your fur to these articles whenever possible.

所以，你一定要隨時準備貢獻你的毛髮。

Each night, you must curl up on their faces or they will freeze to death.

你必須每晚都蜷臥在他們臉上，否則他們會凍死。

For all of this, we only ask the occasional help of opening cans and a clean place to do our "kitty business".

對於所做的一切，我們只要求他們偶爾幫忙開罐頭，以及一個乾淨的地方來解決我們的「要事」。

就算這樣，他們還是有很多需要幫助的地方。

They're constantly bringing in these giant bags they can barely carry.

他們會時不時地拎來一些他們提不動的大袋子（貓砂）。

Remind them there is an alternative: All the strength. Half the weight.

提醒他們另有一項選擇：好用，重量只有一半。