selfishness
US / ˈsɛlfɪʃnɪs/
・UK /'selfɪʃnəs/
A2 初級
n. (u.)不可數名詞 自私
Cam's selfishness caused Carol to believe he was mean
影片字幕
#AskGaryVee 第72集：Casey Neistat 分享申請大學祕訣與如何專注目標！ (#AskGaryVee Episode 72: Casey Neistat on Applying to College & How to Focus on Goals)
- I get so much happiness out of doing things for people who would be categorized as the way you just broke it down because I have a weird gear inside of me that has zero expectation for the return on someone's selfishness.
我從為那些人做事中獲得了巨大的快樂，那些人就像你剛才說的那樣被歸類，因為我內心有個奇怪的機制，對別人自私的付出毫無期待。
- on someone's selfishness.
為什麼我們要花很長時間才能瞭解自己有多糟糕？ (Why It Can Take Us So Long to Understand How Unwell We Are)
- Notice any new human in a terrible circumstance, let's say in a home with a violent or alcoholic parent or an abusive or depressed one, and it won't, as one might imagine it could, be able to focus clearly on what's gone wrong or mourn its condition. It will simply, as we've ascertained it must, keep going. In order to do this, it will call upon a range of innate survival techniques. It may start to think surprisingly well of its parents, declaring them justified in their beatings, selfishness or humiliations. It might assiduously blame itself rather than sparing any pity for its own deprivations. Let's remember that a sense of self-compassion can be a very dangerous thing indeed when one is five years old and no one would listen even if one yelled. Or else it will ward off despair through activity, it will overachieve at school or break windows or become obsessed with drugs or sport or politics – anything not to have to listen to the buzz inside. The benighted child can't look back, it can't glance down, it must simply stare ahead at the main goal – survival.
注意到任何一個處於可怕環境中的新人類，比方說，在一個父母暴力、酗酒、虐待或抑鬱的家庭中，它不會像人們想象的那樣，能夠清楚地關注出了什麼問題或哀悼自己的狀況。它只會像我們已經確定的那樣，繼續生活下去。為了做到這一點，它將調用一系列與生俱來的生存技巧。它可能會開始對父母有驚人的好感，認為他們的毆打、自私或羞辱是理所應當的。它可能會不遺餘力地責怪自己，而不是對自己的匱乏表示同情。讓我們記住，當一個人只有五歲，即使大喊大叫也沒人聽的時候，自我同情的意識確實是一件非常危險的事情。否則，他就會通過活動來抵禦絕望，他就
- It may start to think surprisingly well of its parents, declaring them justified in their beatings, selfishness, or humiliations.
你總是不願面對的紅色警訊！🚩 (The Red Flags You Keep Ignoring)
- That certain people constantly reveal to us some of their deep-seated inclinations towards unkindness, treachery, vanity, and selfishness.
這意味著什麼？
- That certain people constantly reveal to us some of their deep-seated inclinations towards unkindness, treachery, vanity and selfishness.
某些人不斷向我們揭示他們內心深處的一些傾向，如不友善、背叛、虛榮和自私。
所有的惡意都是如何被傳承下來的？！ (How All Meanness Is Inherited)
- The ugliness that washes up on our doorsteps today will be a legacy of ill-treatment, violence, selfishness, hard-heartedness, cynicism, and
我們在日常生活中，在商店裡、董事會會議室、臥室和線上論壇裡看到的惡劣，總是基於一種心理經濟學的法則，以令人震驚的勤勉，一代傳一代。
- The ugliness that washes up on our doorsteps today will be a legacy of ill treatment, violence, selfishness, hard heartedness, cynicism and indifference that came somewhere off stage.
今天我們門口出現的醜陋，將是來自幕後某處的虐待、暴力、自私、冷酷無情、憤世嫉俗和冷漠的遺產。
受傷的人如何尋求更進一步的懲罰？ (How Wounded People Seek Out further Punishment)
- It's just that for us, home was a place of grief and persecution. It's easy enough to see why children put up with poor treatment. They're born radically powerless. They can't run away. They are utterly at the mercy of others. They can't even think especially straight. What they must do, above all else, is adapt. Which in practice means learning to put up with poor treatment. They have to develop an advanced skill at not noticing quite how awful things are, an expertise at being unfazed by cruelty and neglect. Children in deprived circumstances tend to be geniuses at looking away, disassociating and making light of things. Of course, it might not be perfect that their father screams at them constantly, but there are some interesting shows on television and there's a really fascinating bit of the garden to explore in the morning. You can climb up the big tree and imagine it's a little house. And of course, ideally their mother wouldn't be so mocking and disloyal. But that's just the way things are, neither more or less sad than the fact it's often raining and there's a lot of homework to do. In any case, the bad treatment almost certainly has to do with something that they, the child, have done wrong. Badly treated children tend to take a compulsively generous view of those who injure them. Obviously, they aren't nasty on purpose. That would make no sense. Clearly, their ostensible brutality has sound explanations. It must be because they, the child, is in the wrong. That's why they're being neglected. That's why they've been declared fools. That's why they're being bullied. It's a great deal easier to believe that the parent is tough, yet fundamentally right, rather than gratuitously callous and unjustifiably hostile. In other words, what a bad childhood trains us to do, above all else, is to indulge meanness. The muscle that normally functions to repel attacks has had to be starved and has atrophied. In order to survive, we had to lose the ability to work out what was good and bad for us, lest we discover that we spent 18 years in the company of fiends. What this means for our futures is that we will be extremely poor at discerning when the partners we let into our lives cross the border into selfishness and malevolence. We'll continue under a narcoleptic command not to notice that we're being robbed and deceived. We'll be as blind to the blows now as we were then. For a long time, it simply won't occur to us to wonder why we've ended up paying for everything for the partner, or why they're unreliable in their promises, or constantly prioritise their friends over us, or are angrily defensive whenever we raise a complaint. We will simply, as we had to early on, fall into line and invent elaborate explanations for their behaviour. They're good, but they're tired. They're durable, but under pressure at work. They're fierce, but compensating for their childhood traumas, for which we have a lot of sympathy. Anything other than the more straightforward conclusion, we've fallen in with unconcerned egoists. We shouldn't compound our disloyalty towards ourselves by feeling, on top of everything else, ashamed for our tolerance. It isn't weakness, it's a survival strategy from childhood that served a very sensible purpose then but is liable to be ruining our lives now. To wake ourselves up, we need to consider our choices as if someone else had made them. We might wonder what we would advise a friend to do if they were in our situation. And through such a lens, we might start to perceive that the treatment we're facing isn't, as we've long thought, a sign of our partner's depth or complexity, but in the end, something much more humble, evidence that we need to get away. But this will be only a momentary liberation until we can understand the more fundamental issue, that the muscle most people use to eject poison has withered because of a distinctive history. We need to reverse the direction of our psychological fate. Our early suffering should not condemn us to yet more pain. It is what gives us an especially powerful claim on original sources of kindness, tenderness and calm.
只是對我們來說，家是一個充滿悲傷和迫害的地方。很容易理解為什麼孩子們要忍受惡劣的待遇。他們生來就毫無力量他們無法逃避。他們完全任由他人擺佈。他們甚至連思考的能力都沒有他們必須做的，最重要的，就是適應。在實踐中，這意味著要學會忍受惡劣的待遇。他們必須發展出一種高級技能，即不去注意事情有多糟糕，擅長對殘忍和忽視不為所動。生活在貧困環境中的孩子往往是睜一隻眼閉一隻眼、脫離現實和輕描淡寫的天才。當然，他們的父親經常對他們大吼大叫，這可能並不完美，但電視上有一些有趣的節目，而且早上可以去花園裡探索一個非常迷人的地方
- What this means for our futures is that we will be extremely poor at discerning when the partners we let into our lives cross the border into selfishness and malevolence.
Colbert 的取消聖誕節：最後的聖誕頌歌！ (Colbert's Canceled Christmas: The Last Noel)
- Such selfishness!
是時候過來坐在爸爸腿上，告訴我今年聖誕節我會收到什麼了。
- Such selfishness.
真是自私。