prize, float their start-up company, are promoted a decade ahead of their peers or dominate

剛創業就一飛沖天、大幅度領先同期對手、

the music charts or bestseller lists. Over-achievers torment us rather a lot.

稱霸音樂排行榜與暢銷榜，「過度成功者」總是讓我們自嘆不如

But we should, more rightly, combine our envy with a little compassion. It is likely that

但除了嫉妒，我們也應該放入一點同情心

these gifted souls are paying an oddly elevated price for their extraordinary successes, so

因為很可能這些靈魂正為他們的卓越付出很高的代價

much so that - once their full psychological profiles are in view - we should start to

以至於當我們看到了他們的心理概況，

feel a bit sorry for the trajectory of their lives.

可能會開始為他們的生活軌跡感到有點抱歉

What distinguishes over-achievers from the simply highly talented or driven is what powers

過度成功者及一般高才能、高自我要求者的差別是驅使他們工作的原因

them in their work. They labour principally or primarily not because they uniquely enjoy

過度成功者有紀律、使盡全力的工作並不是因為特別享受工作

what they do or have more urgent material demands than the rest of us, but because they

或是有比我們有更多的客戶要求，而是因為

are subject to unusually intense internal, psychological pressures. Behind their relentless

他們臣服於異於常人緊繃的內心及心理壓力，讓他們日以繼夜工作的是

activity lies an emotional rather than professional burden. It may look as if they simply want

精神負擔而不是工作負擔。也許表面上他們只是想多賣幾本書、

to sell more books, accumulate more shares or have their name in lights. But these over-achievers

取得更多股份或是讓自己聲名大噪，但真相是

are all the while trying to secure something far more tricky, unusual and unmentioned:

過度成功者其實一直嘗試去守護那些更難處理、超乎常理及不曾被提起的秘密

they are trying - through their work - to correct an aspect of a troubled emotional

他們透過工作來導正充滿問題的過去

past. They are trying to impress a father who felt withholding and severe around them

也許是為了感動一位在 30 年前冷淡嚴厲的父親

three decades before. They're hoping their triumphs will compensate a parent they loved

過度成功者希望這些卓越成就可以彌補深愛的雙親

for the loss of a sibling in childhood. They are hoping to assuage a feeling of catastrophe

因為他們曾失去了一個孩子，希望可以減輕因為自己的誕生

they experienced in the deprived chaotic home of their birth.

而使家庭支離破碎的悲痛

In other words, over-achievers are trying to solve a range of psychological problems

也可以說，過度成功者正在嘗試經由各種苦難

through material or worldly means. This is why their efforts must, in a deep sense, always

去解決一連串心理層面的難關，這也是為什麼不論已經付出多少努力

be doomed to failure - even when it appears to most of the world as if they are succeeding

在他們的眼中總是不夠，即使在大部份人的眼中

beyond measure.

他們的成績早已超乎想像

Because success is the moment when over-achievers are likely to notice the doomed nature of

過度成功者在成功前都要先承受自己的野心所帶來的巨大壓力

their ambition, it is a particularly troubling and dangerous eventuality. Depression may

這是特別危險及難以處理的部分

set in just after the company is sold; the star will fall into a crisis just after they

他們可能在公司被賣出時罹患憂鬱症，明日之星在紅遍全球的同時

finally gain worldwide recognition. At exactly the point when their work is acclaimed or

也隨時可能殞落，在他們打出了自己的知名度的同時，

finds its audience, over-achievers are at risk of severe breakdown. So long as they

過度成就者也把自己推到了崩潰的邊緣，只要再多前進一步

are merely running, they can forget to notice that their goal is misaligned with their true

他們就會很容易掉入深淵，忘記這一切已經偏離了初衷

inner ambition. They must wait for success to reveal the fateful nature of their life's quest.

他們必須等待成功來帶出自己對人生的渴望

The cure for over-achievement involves pausing to address the psychological wounds that made

能夠拯救過度傑出者的解藥，包括暫時不再為了心理創傷

hard work feel like the only defence against intolerable trauma. It means returning to

而使全力工作成為對抗痛苦創傷的最後一道防線。這代表著重新

the situations that made achievement feel life sustaining. It means a confrontation

找回當初自己達到那份成就的感動

with moments of loss, disconnection, lack of love, sadness and humiliation.

這代表著要再次面對過去的失去、空虛感、孤寂感、悲傷與羞恥感

The recovering over-achiever should allow themselves to feel compassion for their earlier

復原中的過度成功者應該為過去的自己產生憐憫感

self, acknowledging how much they wish could have gone differently and grasping how their

承認自己多麽希望當時自己能夠做出不同的抉擇，瞭解一直以來

parent so-call successful personality has been shaped as a response to grave wounds

追求父母們口中的「成功人格特質」，已成為自己心中傷口的無聲回應

The cure for over-achievement lies in mourning and analysis in an atmosphere of love.

過度成功者的解藥，就是在充滿愛的環境下釋放情緒，及仔細思考一切

The over-achiever may eventually come to believe that they deserve a place on the earth whether

然後他們也許會開始相信，不論有沒有工作，這世界永遠會為自己留一個位置

they work or not. They aren't there just to perform. The greater need is to connect

他們的存在不單單只為了滿足他人。我們需要更多人與人之間的連結

and to understand.

及互相理解

We live in a world very interested in huge achievements and very uninclined to notice

我們生存的世界重視高成就，卻非常不願意去注意

the trauma behind them. We are equally not encouraged to note the way in which contentment

這些高成就背後的傷痛，我們也不鼓勵輕易對現有成就感到感足

with modest achievement can be a sign that things have gone very well for someone emotionally.

卻沒發現到，適當的成就其實就可以帶給人們心靈上很大的滿足

It is evidence of health to have no particular wish to be famous and not to mind too much

不刻意追求名聲、不過份介意財富都是是健康的象徵

if one doesn't have a fortune; to be able to have a so-called ordinary life, to take

我們應該都有權利去過所謂平凡的生活

pleasure in holidays and to place friendship and love at the center of things. We should,

一個可以享受假日，去交朋友，去真實的享受一切的生活

on occasion, dare to feel rather sorry for over-achievers - even if that can mean starting

偶爾，我們應該為過度成功者感到抱歉，即使這可能也意味著一個

to feel sorry for ourselves.

為我們自己感到抱歉的開始

We hope you enjoyed this film. If you want to learn more about Self-Knowledge, follow the link on your screen now.

我們希望你享受這部影片，如果想學習更多關於自我認識的議題，請點選螢幕上的連結