Name: 我是自閉症患者--這就是我決定停止掩飾的原因 | BBC Ideas (I’m autistic – here’s why I decided to stop masking | BBC Ideas)
Uploaded: 2025-07-20T18:27:42.000Z
Duration: 4 min 56 s

程度副詞

Thank you, I slightly overestimated how tall I am there.

謝謝，我稍微高估了自己的身高。

To my mum, I knew from a very young age that I was different.

對媽媽來說，我從小就知道自己與眾不同。

The way I'd sort my toys, that I'd insist on different plates for different foods and birthday parties made me anxious.

我給玩具分類的方式，我堅持用不同的盤子裝不同的食物，以及生日派對都讓我焦慮不安。

And by the time I was four years old, I became so sure that if I didn't hide my differences, people wouldn't like me.

到我四歲時，我變得非常確信，如果我不隱藏自己的與眾不同，別人就不會喜歡我。

So I became a version of myself I thought those around me would accept.

於是，我變成了一個我認為周圍人會接受的自己。

I became a mimic, copying other people, imitating normal behaviour and suppressing anything weird.

我成了一個模仿者，模仿別人，模仿正常的行為，壓抑任何怪異的東西。

For most people, these rules come naturally, automatically.

對大多數人來說，這些規則是自然而然、自動形成的。

Their faces match their voices, match their feelings.

他們的表情與他們的聲音相吻合，與他們的感情相吻合。

But I had to think about every little thing.

In the end, I put so much effort into this mask of normality that nobody could even tell that I had one.

最後，我費盡心機戴上了正常人的面具，甚至沒人能看出我戴了面具。

When you're autistic, masking, camouflaging is a survival strategy.

當你患有自閉症時，掩飾、偽裝是一種生存策略。

It's to avoid judgement or avoid bullying.

這是為了避免評判或避免欺凌。

It's a way to fit into the non-autistic world.

這是融入非自閉症世界的一種方式。

I have masked with everybody in my life, including you, Mum.

我和我生命中的每個人都戴過面具，包括你，媽媽。

It's exhausting pretending to be normal all the time.

一直假裝正常，真讓人精疲力竭。

I'm beginning to think it might be time to embrace my authentic self to show you the things you don't normally see.

我開始覺得，也許是時候擁抱真實的自己，向你們展示你們通常看不到的東西了。

I'm worried that if I'm quiet and still, or my face doesn't match my feelings, then you'll think that I'm being rude.

我擔心，如果我一言不發、一動不動，或者我的表情與我的感受不符，那麼你會認為我很粗魯。

I'm worried that if you see me rocking back and forth or flapping my hands, then you'll think that I'm not okay.

我擔心如果你看到我前後搖晃或拍打雙手，你會認為我不好。

And I'm worried that if you see me silent, unable to speak, you'll think that I need fixing.

我擔心如果你看到我沉默不語，不能說話，你會認為我需要治療。

It might not come easily for me straight away, but I'm ready to be myself.

對我來說，這可能並不容易，但我已經準備好做我自己了。

我永遠愛你，你的女兒，芙蓉。

I want to scoop up the five-year-old you.

And if we could turn the clock back and I knew what I know today, it would be, maybe I would have been able to give you some reassurance about it's okay.

如果時光可以倒流，我知道今天我所知道的一切，也許我就能給你一些安慰，告訴你一切都會好起來的。

All through my childhood and my teenage life and my adult life, you've been so accepting, I'm going to cry, of everything that I am.

在我的童年、少年和成年生活中，你對我的一切都那麼包容，我都要哭了。

No, but I, please, you know, you don't have to mask in front of me anymore.

不，但我，求你了，你知道，你不必再在我面前戴面具了。

這就是我想為你們錄製這段視頻的原因。

我希望這部電影能告訴你這一點。

If you enjoyed that, be sure to check out these videos next.

如果您喜歡，請務必查看接下來的視頻。

And if you haven't already hit the subscribe button and click the bell to get a notification each time we upload a new video.

如果您還沒有訂閱，請點擊 "訂閱 "按鈕，然後點擊鈴鐺，我們每次上傳新視頻時都會通知您。