You know that every time you let things pile up, you suddenly shut down and have the urge to go to sleep instead of working on what you have to do.

你知道每次把事情堆積起來時，你會突然不想動，然後有去睡覺的衝動，而不是去做該完成的事。

You realize that maybe your anxiety is taking control over huge chunks of your life, but have you ever wondered if your anxiety is ruining your relationship?

你意識到也許你的焦慮正在控制你生活很大一部分，但你有沒有想過你的焦慮正在破壞你的關係？

Generalized anxiety disorder, or GAD, is characterized by an excessive worry about a number of different things.

廣泛性焦慮症（GAD）的特點是對許多不同的事過度擔心。

This constant worrying can make you develop anxiety motivated behaviors that might get in the way of your job, your family, your friends and even your romantic relationships.

這種經常性的擔心使你產生由焦慮導致的行為，可能會妨礙你的工作、家庭、朋友甚至是你的另一半。

So how do you know if your anxiety is ruining your relationships?

那麼，怎麼知道焦慮是否破壞了你的關係呢？

Here are some signs.

有一些跡象。

First of: Avoiding

首先是逃避。

If you are avoiding the person in any way, your anxiety might be in the way of your relationship.

如果你以任何方式逃避對方，你的焦慮可能會阻礙你們間的關係。

When it comes to avoidance, anxiety can manifest as not opening up to your partner, avoiding serious or deep topics, not communicating or even not getting into relationships at all.

當涉及到逃避時，焦慮的表現有：不向你另一半敞開心胸、避免嚴肅或複雜的話題，不溝通，甚至根本不投入關係。

According to an article on "Verywell mind" what people with anxiety are trying to avoid his negative feelings, feeling more anxiety and getting hurt.

根據一篇在 Verywell mind 的文章，有焦慮症的人為了逃避自己的負面情緒而感到更多的焦慮甚至是受到傷害。

Someone who is avoidance of close relationships may seem cold, lacking empathy and emotionally unavailable.

一個逃避親密關係的人可能看起來很冷漠、缺乏同理心、在情感上無法得到滿足。

They may also come off as passive aggressive in an attempt to avoid people.

他們也可能藉由被動攻擊來試圖逃避。

People suffering from anxiety can also turn to avoidance in order to spare their partner from their problems.

患有焦慮症的人也會藉由逃避不讓另一半被自己的問題影響。

Thinking that they'll burden their partner if they share anything.

認為如果他們分享一些事的話會給他們的伴侶帶來負擔。

Anxious people may dismiss their own troubles, which also means their partner can't nurture and support them as well as they could.

焦慮的人也可能會把自己的麻煩忽略，這代表著他們的另一伴幫助和支持不到他們。

On the flip side is dependence.

反之，則是依賴性。

The other side of avoidance is called dependency.

逃避的另一面是依賴。

In this case the person suffering from anxiety has an excessive dependency on their partner for support and assurance.

這種情況下，為了獲得支持和把握，患有焦慮症的人會過度依賴他們的伴侶。

They also have a deep and constant desire for closeness, whether that be physical, emotional or mental. .

他們對親密關係還很常有很深的渴望，無論是身體、情感還是精神上。

"Verywell mind" states that along with being overly dependent, people with anxiety may find themselves prone to overthinking,

Verywell mind 指出，伴隨著過度依賴，焦慮患者可能會發現自己容易想太多，

planning for all worst case scenarios, being indecisive, fearing for rejection, leaking out constant communication and getting anxious if a partner or friend does not respond quickly.

為所有最壞的情況做計劃、優柔寡斷、害怕被拒絕，常會想要溝通但另一半如果沒有很快回覆會變得很焦慮。

The anxiety can quickly turn into anger and can cause the person to act out in ways that threaten to break up the relationship.

而這樣的焦慮會迅速化為憤怒，並讓患者採取威脅分手的作法。

Other behaviors of people who suffer from anxiety can include being controlling, being distracted and having trouble focusing coming across as overly critical and being a perfectionist.

患有焦慮症的人也可能有控制慾強、注意力分散和難以集中，過度責備和完美主義的行為。

Most of these behaviors are triggered by constant questions and ruminating that people with anxiety tend to do.

這些行為大多是由不斷懷疑和反覆思考引發的。

Some things they may be thinking about could be: What if they don't love me as much as I love them?

他們可能想的是：如果他們不像我愛他們那樣愛我怎麼辦？

What if they're lying to me?

如果他們騙我怎麼辦？

What if they're hiding something from me?

如果他們對我有所隱瞞怎麼辦？

What if they're cheating on me, what if they like someone else more?

如果他們對我不忠，如果他們更喜歡別人怎麼辦？

What if my anxiety ruins our relationship?

如果我的焦慮毀了我們的關係怎麼辦？

What if we break up?

如果我們分手了怎麼辦？

What if they don't text me back?

如果他們不回我訊息怎麼辦？

What if I'm always the first one to reach out?

如果我總是做主動的那方怎麼辦？

What if they ghost me?

如果不接電話、不回訊息，什麼都不接怎麼辦？

These thoughts go round and round in their minds, creating negative worst case scenarios.

這些想法在他們的腦海中轉來轉去，創造出最壞的情況。

They may come to believe these scenarios, which might lead them to make some negative decisions or act in explosive ways.

他們可能會相信這些情景，導致他們做出一些負面的決定或大爆炸。

So how to help?

那麼該如何幫助呢？

If you are a friend or a partner of someone suffering from anxiety, remind them that you're there for them and that whatever it is that they're going through, you can help handle it.

如果你是焦慮患者的朋友或伴侶，提醒他們，你在他們身邊，無論他們正在經歷什麼你都可以幫忙。

Encourage them to seek therapy, whether individual or couples, and maybe you seek therapy for yourself that you can learn more about how anxiety works and better help yourself and your partner.

鼓勵他們接受治療，無論是個人或夫妻情侶，如果你為自己尋求治療，你可以瞭解更多關於焦慮的來龍去脈，更好來幫助自己和伴侶。

If you are the one suffering from anxiety, get help by going to a therapist, try to slowly open yourself up to your partner and lean more on them.

如果你是那個焦慮患者，可以透過治療師來獲得幫助，試著慢慢向你的伴侶敞開自己，並依靠他們多一些。

If you're one who tends to avoid, if you're a person who tends to be overly dependent, look into yourself and realize that you're more than capable to work on some things on your own.

如果你是一個容易逃避，如果你是一個會過度依賴，請審視自己，意識到你有能力自己解決一些事情。

You don't need to depend on others all of the time.

你不需要一直依賴別人。

So did you identify with this video?

那麼，你同意這個影片嗎？

Let us know in the comments what you think.

請在評論中告訴我們你的想法。