每日口說挑戰【MarieTV】當背叛無法忘懷時，該如何寬恕對方? (How To Forgive When You Can't Forget)

What’s up, VoiceTubers? Leila here. I wanna take you back for a moment. Remember when you were a kid and you’d get into a fight with a friend or sibling? And then your teacher or parent would tell you, “Say you’re sorry.” “Sorry.” “Good. Now go back and play.” And that would be the end of it. Sure, that might be a pretty common childhood memory. But what about this one: do you remember ever being told how to forgive? I don’t. That’s what today’s video is about. Check it out if you haven’t already. It turns out forgiveness is a two-step process, and forgiving the person who wronged you is actually step two.

In the meantime, let’s get to the Sentence of the Day.


Sentence:
Forgiving someone doesn't mean that you instantly or ever trust someone again. Forgiveness and trust are separate issues.
原諒他人並不代表你馬上就要再度或永遠信任他人。寬恕和信任兩者是各自獨立的問題。


Pronunciation tips:

“and” + “trust” = /antrust/
“or ever”
You can raise your intonation here to emphasize the fact that you’re giving another choice.
Separate (sounds more like /se-pret/)

Vocabulary:

forgiveness (n.) KK: /fəˈɡɪvnɪs/ IPA: /fɚˈɡɪv.nəs/
the act of forgiving or the willingness to forgive
原諒；寬恕
He shows up at the end, begging for forgiveness, holding a stereo over his head playing their favorite song.
最後他舉著一台播放器，放著他們最愛的歌，請求原諒。


trust (n.) KK: /trʌst/ IPA: /trʌst/
the belief that you can trust someone or something
信任，信賴
Sean had little trust in the guy, but he gave him a job anyway as one last favor to a friend.
Sean 對這個男子的信任非常低，但他還是為了幫朋友最後一個忙，給了他一份工作。


instantly (adv.) KK: /ˈɪnst(ə)ntli/ IPA: /ˈɪn.stənt.li/
immediately
立即，馬上
Rachel fell asleep instantly when her head hit the pillow.
當 Rachel 頭一沾到枕頭就立刻睡著了。




I loved this point from the video--the idea that forgiveness and trust are not the same thing--because I used to think that they were. I used to think that forgiving someone meant swallowing a lot of pain, that I had to give that person a second, third or even fourth chance, only to get hurt again. It kinda felt like forgiving someone else meant that I had to keep beating myself up, but that on the outside I had to make it look like everything was alright. I was so relieved to learn that’s NOT what forgiveness is supposed to look or feel like.

Okay, well, not at first. When I first started learning about forgiveness, I thought it sounded totally crazy. “Forgiveness is a gift to myself?! What is this mumbo jumbo?” It took some time for me to realize that before I could even start to think about forgiving the other person, I had to forgive myself for not being perfect, for getting hurt in the first place. And y’wanna hear something really weird? This is totally one of those things that you can get better at with practice. The more I practice forgiving myself, the easier it gets for me to forgive others. Sort of. Hey! I’m a work in progress. Aren’t we all? What are you ready to forgive yourself for? Come on--what have you been beating yourself up over lately? What weight have you been carrying around that you are finally ready to put down? Let me know in the comments. And as always, hit that record button when you’re ready with your sentence. Catch ya next time.

#一段關係裡不是對方需要我們的原諒；是我們需要放過自己。

Forgiving someone doesn't mean that you instantly or ever trust someone again. Forgiveness and trust are separate issues.

Forgiving someone doesn't mean that you instantly or ever trust someone again. Forgiveness and trust are separate issues.
原諒他人並不代表你馬上就要再度或永遠信任他人。寬恕和信任是兩個各自獨立的議題。

Forgiving someone doesn't mean that you instantly or ever trust someone again. Forgiveness and trust are separate issues.

What’s up, VoiceTubers? Leila here. I wanna take you back for a moment. Remember when you were a kid and you’d get into a fight with a friend or sibling(手足)? And then your teacher or parent would tell you, “Say you’re sorry.” “Sorry.” “Good. Now go back and play.” And that would be the end of it. Sure, that might be a pretty common childhood(孩童時期) memory. But what about this one: do you remember ever being told how to forgive? I don’t. That’s what today’s video is about. Check it out if you haven’t already. It turns out forgiveness is a two-step(兩個步驟的) process(過程), and forgiving the person who wronged(不公正地對待,冤枉v.) you is actually step two.

◆ wrong /rɑːŋ/ v. 不公正地對待；冤枉 to treat someone in an unfair or unacceptable way:
She felt deeply wronged by his accusations(/ˌæk.jəˈzeɪ.ʃən/指控n.). 他的指控使她覺得深受冤枉。

In the meantime, let’s get to the Sentence of the Day.
Forgiving someone doesn't mean that you instantly(/ˈɪn.stənt.li/立即adv.) or ever(永遠adv.) trust(相信v.) someone again. Forgiveness(原諒n.) and trust(信任n.) are separate(/ˈsep.ɚ.ət/不同的) issues(/ˈɪʃ.uː/議題).
原諒別人並不代表你馬上就要永遠或是再度相信他。寬恕和信任是兩個不同的議題。

1 forgiveness (n.) /fɚˈɡɪv.nəs/ 原諒；寬恕 the act of forgiving or the willingness to forgive:
He shows up(出現) at the end, begging(請求v.) for forgiveness, holding a stereo(/ˈster.i.oʊ/播放器) over his head playing their favorite song.

2 trust (n.) /trʌst/ 信任，信賴 the belief that you can trust someone or something:
Sean had little(極少的) trust in the guy, but he gave him a job anyway as one last favor(幫助,恩惠n.) to a friend.

3 instantly (adv.) /ˈɪn.stənt.li/ 立即，馬上 = immediately
Rachel fell asleep(睡著) instantly when her head hit the pillow(枕頭).

I loved this point from the video--the idea that forgiveness and trust are not the same thing--because I used to(過去曾經) think that they were. I used to think that forgiving someone meant(/ment/mean的過去式) swallowing(吞下v.) a lot of pain, that I had to give that person a second, third or even fourth chance(/tʃæns/機會), only to get hurt(受傷的adj.) again. It kinda felt like forgiving someone else meant that I had to keep *beating myself up(怪罪自己,苛求自己), but that on the outside(外觀) I had to make it look like everything was alright. I was so relieved(寬慰的,解脫的) to learn that’s NOT what forgiveness is supposed(應當的) to look or feel like. Okay, well, not at first. When I first started learning about forgiveness, I thought it sounded totally crazy. “Forgiveness is a gift to myself?! What is this mumbo jumbo(/ˌmʌm.boʊ ˈdʒʌm.boʊ/鬼話n.)?” It took some time for me to realize that before I could even start to think about forgiving the other person, I had to forgive myself for not being perfect(完美的), for getting hurt in the first place. And y’wanna hear something really weird(奇怪的)? This is totally one of those things that you can get better at with practice(練習n.). The more I practice forgiving myself, the easier it gets for me to forgive others. Sort of(在某種程度上). Hey! I’m a work(成果n.) in progress(/ˈprɑː.ɡres/進步n.). Aren’t we all? What are you ready to forgive yourself for? Come on--what have you been beating yourself up over lately(最近adv.)? What weight(負擔,重量n.) have you been carrying around that you are finally ready to put down?

◆ beat yourself up :（過分）怪罪自己，苛求自己 to blame or criticize yourself, usually in a way that is unfair or unnecessary:
If you fail, don't beat yourself up; just try again. 如果你失敗了，不要過分怪罪自己，大不了再試試。

◆ mumbo jumbo /ˌmʌm.boʊ ˈdʒʌm.boʊ/ n. 晦澀難懂的話；無意義的活動；繁文縟節 words or activities that seem complicated or mysterious but have no real meaning:
You don't believe in horoscopes(/ˈhɔːr.ə.skoʊp/占星術) and all that mumbo jumbo, do you? 你不相信占星術和那套鬼話，是吧？

到了一個年紀以後就變得很希望過去犯的錯都有機會被寬恕ಥ_ಥ
Forgiving someone doesn’t mean that you instantly or ever trust someone again.
Forgiveness and trust are separate issues.

Forgiving someone doesn’t mean that you instantly or ever trust someone again. Forgiveness and trust are separate issues.

Day 56

Forgiving someone doesn't mean that you instantly or ever trust someone again. Forgiveness and trust are separate issues.
原諒他人並不代表你馬上就要再度或永遠信任他人。寬恕和信任兩者是各自獨立的問題。