This is an issue that I face on an almost daily basis, and this week I've had to deal with it even more because we're in New York.

這是個我幾乎每天都會面對的問題，而這星期因為我們來到紐約，我甚至碰到更多次。

People frequently confuse me with someone else, with another person who-- a person who isn't me.

人們很常把我和另外一個不是我的人搞混。

And so as a public service to me, and to the other person, I got in touch with him, and we made a video together that hopefully will clear this little headache up once and for all.

為了替我們兩個行行好，我和他聯絡並一起拍了一個影片，希望能徹底澄清這個惱人的問題。

Hi, I'm Jimmy Kimmel.

嗨，我是吉米金默。

And I'm Jimmy Fallon.

然後我是吉米法隆。

And some people think I'm Jimmy Kimmel.

有些人以為我是吉米金默。

And some people think I'm Jimmy Fallon.

有些人以為我是吉米法隆。

And it's causing a lot of problems for us at the airport.

在機場時這造成我們很多困擾。

So we decided to make a quick video to explain who's who and what's what.

所以我們決定要來拍個短片解釋誰是誰還有什麼是什麼。

And we understand why people get us confused.

我們知道為什麼人們會搞混我們兩個。

The names.

因為名字。

Mhm.

嗯哼。

We both wear suits.

我們都穿西裝。

We both have shows.

我們都主持脫口秀。

We both have dark hair.

我們都有深色頭髮。

We're both white guys, which is not as exciting as it used to be.

我們都是白種人，這不像以前一樣刺激。

Definitely not.

肯定不像。

But the truth is we're very different Jimmy's in a lot of ways.

但其實很多方面看來我們是兩個非常不一樣的吉米。

For instance, I was born in Brooklyn, New York.

舉例來說，我出生於紐約布魯克林。

Oh, I was born in Brooklyn, too.

噢，我也在布魯克林出生。

OK, so not a great example by me.

好的，我舉的這個例子不太好。

But we're different.

但我們很不一樣。

Like, what did Jimmy Fallon have for breakfast today?

像是，吉米法隆天早上吃什麼？

I had oatmeal with baby carrots on top.

我吃燕麥加小紅蘿蔔。

That's what I had.

我也吃那個。

But that's a pretty common breakfast.

不過那是個蠻常見的早餐食物。

Tell me.

我知道。

OK, count of three, name your five favorite breakfast cereals.

好，數到三說出五個你最喜歡的早餐穀片。

- Ready? - Sure.

- 準備好了嗎？ -當然。

Go.

開始。

Fruit Loops, Lucky Charms, Frosted Flakes, Count Chocula, Trix.

Fruit Loops、Lucky Charms、Frosted Flakes、Count Chocula、Trix。

What the--

什麼鬼...

- Well, they're very popular breakfast cereals, so that doesn't really-- - Yeah.

- 嗯，那些都是很受歡迎的早餐穀片，所以那不太... - 對啊。

Weird question.

好奇怪的問題。

Like-- like, pizza is everyone's favorite for lunch.

就跟大家都最喜歡午餐吃披薩一樣。

Well, it certainly is mine.

我確實最喜歡午餐吃披薩。

Mine, too.

我也是。

I love pizza.

我超愛披薩。

I'm wearing pizza underpants right now.

我現在就穿著披薩內褲。

Look at this.

看一下。

Look here.

你看。

No way.

不可能。

Nipples.

奶頭。

- Did you just say nipples? - Mhm.

- 你剛剛說奶頭嗎？ - 嗯哼。

Why would you say that?

你為什麼那樣說？

I don't know.

我不知道欸。

I say it all the time.

我一直那樣說。

Me, too.

我也是。

Nipples.

奶頭。

Have you had a DNA test?

你有做過 DNA 測試嗎？

Because I just did a 23andMe.

因為我剛做了 23andMe 基因測試。

Yeah, I have, actually.

有，我其實有做過。

Oh.

噢。

Turns out I'm 100% that b*tch.

結果我百分之百是個 X 子。

Wow.

哇！

Uh-- high five on that.

呃，擊個掌。

Sorry.

抱歉。

I'm bad at high fiving.

我很不會擊掌。

I'm bad at high fiving, too.

我也很不會擊掌。

I mean, yesterday I had tried to high five somebody and poked a lady in the eye.

我是說，我昨天試著要跟一個女生擊掌結果戳到她眼睛。

Wait a minute.

等一下。

Was she about this tall?

她差不多這麼高嗎？

Russian lady?

俄羅斯女生？

Yes.

對。

I poked her other eye.

我戳到她另外一隻眼睛。

Oh, my lord.

噢，天啊。

Oh, hold on.

噢，等等。

I know how we're different.

我知道我們哪裡不一樣了。

Do you believe the earth is flat?

你相信地球是平的嗎？

I know it's flat.

我知道是平的。

I walk on it.

我走在上面。

Holy shift stick on a 1982 Pontiac Grand Am.

天殺的 1982 龐帝克 Grand Am 上的排檔桿。

That was your first car, too?

那也是你的第一台車？

When I was a baby, I absorbed my twin brother in the womb.

我還是小嬰兒的時候，在子宮裡吸收了我的雙胞胎兄弟。

So did I.

我也是。

His name was Larry.

他的名字是小勞。

Ah, mine was Lawrence.

啊幸好，我兄弟叫勞倫斯。

So--

所以...

Oh, my god.

噢，我的天啊！

Who are you?

你是誰啊？

I don't know.

我不知道。

Do you have any tattoos?

你有刺青嗎？

One.

一個。

We both have a tattoo of Tattoo?

我們都有電視劇角色 Tattoo 的刺青？

Nipples.

奶頭。

You know, I think I'm starting to understand why this is so hard for everybody.

你知道嗎，我覺得我開始了解為什麼大家很難分辨我們了。

We're like the same person.

我們就像同一個人。

I mean, unless you like--

除非你喜歡...

Matt Damon?

麥特戴蒙？

Oh, no, he is the biggest loser in the world.

噢不，他是世界上最爛的輸家。

Can I see you in the bathroom for a second?

我們可以去廁所碰面一下嗎？

Yeah.

好啊。

I want to show you something.

我想給你看一個東西。

You have a small penis, too?

你那裡也很小嗎？

Yeah.

對。

A message from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

耶穌基督後期聖徒教會關心您。

I still can't tell us apart.

我還是分辨不出我們兩個。

Well, thanks to Jimmy Fallon, or me, or whichever one of us that was.

感謝吉米法隆，或那是我，或我們之中任一個人。