and I asked myself the simple question, "Why?"

我問了自己一個簡單的問題：「為什麼？」

I had worked for years to be where I was,

我努力了好幾年才取得現在的成就，

a young social activist, who co-created two successful non-profit organizations,

一個年輕的社會運動者，兩個成功的非營利組織的共同創業者，

a good student, and an even better friend,

一個好學生，一個對朋友很好的人，

and a girl who never lacked positivity nor energy.

一個從不缺乏正能量和活力的女孩。

I asked myself why I had ignored what was going on in my head for so long,

我問自己，我為什麼長期以來忽視腦中的想法，

simply to maintain this reputation.

只為了維持良好的名聲。

I had already accomplished so much in my life,

在我已經實現許多人生目標時，

when strange things began happening to me.

奇怪的事情開始發生在我身上。

When even though I was incredibly academically motivated in the past,

儘管我過去在學業上很積極

I couldn't seem to do homework,

我卻不想寫作業、

and I removed myself from friends, and I didn't answer my phone for a week,

開始遠離我的朋友、一周都不接電話、

and I refused to go to school,

拒絕去上學，

and getting out of my bed in the morning seemed impossible.

早上根本無法離開被窩。

Now, looking back,

現在，回首過去，

I realize that I had to redefine what success was.

我明白我得重新定義何謂成功。

Because if everything I'd done in my life, leading up to that point,

因為如果直到當時為止我做的每件事情，

deemed me successful, why was I siting in the hospital?

都被視為是成功的，為什麼我會在醫院？

I realize that my ability to find this new normal,

我意識到我找到新常態的能力、

my ability to adapt to this new-found empathy,

我適應剛發現的同理心的能力

that's what makes me successful.

正是讓我成功的原因。

Being got diagnosed with clinical depression

被診斷出臨床憂鬱症

is what it took for me to realize what success was.

讓我明白成功的意義。

Though I could go on, I'm not here to simply tell you all about my story.

雖然我可以繼續說下去，但我今天在這裡不只是要分享我的故事。

I am here to tell you why I think this is happening not only to me

我是為了告訴你們為什麼我認為憂鬱症不只發生在我身上，

but to a dangerous number of teenagers in this country.

也發生在我們國家許多青少年身上。

A statistic that is increasing every year

統計數據逐年增加，

and why each one of you needs to advocate for programs and schools for teens that are suffering from depression and anxiety.

這就是為什麼在座每個人都需要為患有憂鬱症與焦慮症的青年提供援助計畫和學校。

Depression in our society is not obvious

憂鬱症在我們的社會中無法輕易被察覺，

when walking down the street or the hallway,

如果你只是走在街道上或走廊上，

but simply open your laptops, your smartphones, your tablets,

但只要使用你的筆電、智慧型手機、平板

and do maybe one Google search, and you'll be blown away.

在 Google 上搜尋，你一定會感到很震驚。

After my one Google search,

我用 Google 搜尋後，

I found that after a study conducted in this spring,

我發現一個今年春天做的研究，

1.6 million Tumblr blogs were examined,

160 萬個 Tumblr 部落格被審查，

and of those, 200,000 contained pictures, videos, and text posts of teenagers hurting themselves due to depression.

其中，有 20 萬個部落格出現罹患憂鬱症的青少年自殘的照片、影片和貼文。

Is it because we now have the technology to express an ever-present feeling

是因為我們現在有了科技能夠表達永遠存在的感覺

or is it something greater?

還是有更嚴重的問題？

Is it just a coincidence

以下的情況是巧合嗎？

that school systems and standardized tests are getting harder

學校體系和標準化測驗變得更困難了、

and college acceptance rates are going down,

大學錄取率逐漸下降、

and the pressures to be stereotypical men or women are everywhere?

成為刻板印象中的男性或女性的壓力無所不在？

Is it possible that we, that this society,

有沒有可能我們、這個社會，

is the thing responsible for the increasing of disease that is more than capable of killing?

需為這個比殺人還嚴重的疾病成因負起責任？

And we don't talk about it much

我們不夠重視這個疾病，

because it's often deemed a phase or hormones, or being overemotional.

因為它常被視為過渡期、賀爾蒙作祟或太情緒化。

Oftentimes, conversations regarding mental illnesses, such as depression,

通常憂鬱症等精神疾病的話題

result in words being thrown around that are nearly irrelevant.

被與幾乎無關的字眼畫上等號。

Depression is not the emotion sadness.

憂鬱症不是悲傷的情緒。

Depression is a state of being below neutrality.

憂鬱症是一種異常狀態。

Sadness is an emotion that comes and goes just as happiness does.

悲傷和快樂都是時有時無的情緒。

My biggest pet peeve is when someone comes up to you and says something along the lines of:

最讓我受不了的事情就是聽到有人說出這種話：

"I'm sorry, I was just depressed earlier, I'm so depressed right now."

「很抱歉，我剛剛只是有點憂鬱，我現在好憂鬱。」

Depression does not just come and go, it's there.

憂鬱症不是時有時無的情緒，而是一直存在的狀態。

And it is the third largest cause of death among teenagers in this country.

它是造成這個國家青少年死亡的第三大主因。

4,400 kids commit suicide a year,

每年有 4400 名兒童自殺，

and for everyone of those, at least 100 attempt.

而且每個都嘗試了100次。

So now, I am standing here asking you all

所以，現在，我站在這裡問各位

the same simple question I asked myself when I was in the hospital: "Why?"

我在醫院時問自己的問題：「為什麼？」

But this time it's: "Why we are not doing more to prevent this?"

但我想改問：「為什麼我們不採取更多預防措施？」

My school has a Bridge program for kids

我的學校有一項Bridge計畫，

that are transitioning in from an extended absence.

為長期缺課的孩子提供幫助。

Many of us have suffered from severe depression and severe anxiety,

很多人都曾罹患重度憂鬱症和焦慮症，

and many of us say that the program has saved our lives

很多人都認為這個計畫救了我們的命，

because it puts our mental health first.

因為它將我們的精神健康擺在第一位。

How can we be expected to be successful in life

我們怎麼能夠期待擁有成功的人生、

and go to a good college, and have a good career,

上一所好大學或找一份好工作，

if the pressure is too overwhelming, and we don't even finish high school?

如果壓力大到我們連高中都讀不完？

"Bridge" talks to our parents, our teachers,

「Bridge」會和我們的父母、師長談話，

anyone we need to know what is going on in order to help us cope.

任何我們需要的人，以了解狀況並協助我們解決問題。

The Bridge team consists of an academic coordinator

Bridge 團隊包括一位教務協調員，

who has the weirdest taste in music,

他的音樂品味非常奇特，

like this guy is either listening to Bob Marley or like, tribal music,

他不是在聽 Bob Marley 就是在聽部落音樂，

there is really none in between.

沒有介於兩者之間的音樂。

We have a mental health specialist who is obsessed with mini butterfingers.

有一位熱愛迷你允指奶油巧克力的心理健康專家。

An intern who is insanely good at bananagrams,

有一位超級擅長香蕉拼字遊戲的實習生，

and another intern who, though is very smart and goes to Harvard,

還有一位實習生，雖然聰明到考上哈佛，

has yet to advance pass two songs in the guitar this year.

但今年為止只能用吉他彈兩首歌。

But, even so, these four people have become a both necessary and life changing asset

但即使如此，這四個人已經成為扭轉他人人生的必要資產，

in mine and other Bridge students' lives.

對我和其他參與Bridge計劃的學生皆是如此。

I'm here today to ask you all a quick favor, a quick favor to advocate to schools,

我今天來這裡是想請你們幫個小忙，請你們向學校提出建議，

advocate to your school boards for these programs.

向你們學校的董事會提倡這些計畫。

Because when I was in the mental hospital,

因為我在精神病院的期間，

I met a girl, we can call her Jane,

認識了一個女孩，叫她 Jane 好了，

and Jane had been there for weeks,

Jane 已經在那裡待了好幾週，

and I had never met someone who understood what I was going through,

我從沒遇見像她這麼理解我的經歷的人，

and now I thought that she felt the exact pain, had the exact fear as me,

現在我知道她感受到同樣的痛苦和恐懼，

she had been there for weeks,

她在那裡待了好幾週，

it was her third hospitalization and her school had no support for her.

那是她第三次住院，而她的學校沒有提供她任何援助。

I told her about Bridge and she was blown away

我跟她說明了 Bridge 計畫，她很驚訝，

that something like that existed.

竟然有這種計畫。

We shouldn't have to wait for these statistics to get higher,

我們不應該坐等這些統計數據升高、

and the number of teens to skyrocket,

罹患疾病的青少年數據飆升，

because if we have the power to raise 100 million dollars in a month for ALS,

因為如果我們能夠在一個月內募集一億美元的漸凍人援助金，

we have the power to advocate to schools for programs.

我們就有能夠向學校提倡這個計畫。

I'm in the process of creating another non-profit organization,

我正在籌備創立另一個非營利組織，

of which provides schools with the funding necessary to create these programs for teens.

它能提供學校制定這些青少年計畫的必要資金。

So please be on the lookout for that.

所以請各位留意這件事。

But in the meantime,

但與此同時，

if you don't have depression or you don't know anyone who does,

如果你沒有憂鬱症，或是你不認識有憂鬱症的人，

advocate for the 10% to 15% of our society that are suffering from this disease.

請替我們社會中 10%-15% 罹患憂鬱症的人聲援。

We are so blessed to live in a country where our voices,

我們很幸運能夠生活在這個能為自己發聲的國家，

our voices are meant to be heard, and they actually mean something.

我們的聲音肯定會被聽到，而它們確實具有意義。

So, if just some of you, who listen to me talk today,

所以，如果今天來聽我演講的一些聽眾

advocate to your school boards, and you beg, plead, demand that programs are set up,

能遊說、請求、要求貴校的董事會制定相關計畫，

and maybe you start a petition, and it's for school funded support,

又或者發起請願，請求學校資助，

whatever you do, just do something, the impact would be life changing.

無論你做什麼，只要付諸行動，就能產生改變他人人生的影響力。

Together, we can fight this disease that is controlling so many of us.

只要齊心協力，我們就能戰勝這個控制著許多人的疾病。

And if you're out there, and you're dealing with depression,

如果你正在與憂鬱症對抗，

turn the energy that you have towards hatred for this awful thing into energy for change.

把你對這個可怕疾病的憎恨轉化為改變的能量。

Because together we can fight back, and we can't let it win,

因為只要我們團結就能擊敗它，我們不能被他擊敗，

we can't let depression win anymore.

我們不能再讓憂鬱症打敗我們。

It's time to fight back.

是時候反擊了。

Thank you.

謝謝大家。