This is old-school.

這好「古早味」

When this first came out,

這個剛出來的時候

-I watched it, like 150 times in a row. -Who didn't?

- 我連續看了大概150次 - 誰沒有？

You hit me with the classics.

你給我看這些經典的

I've never seen that one before.

我從來沒看過這個

Something bad is going to happen.

有壞事要發生了

It's a completely different experience knowing the pay-off first.

先知道後果是完全不同的感覺

(gasp) Oh!

（倒抽一口氣）噢！

What the--no!

什麼...不！

Well, she almost did, like, a flip too, so...that's pretty impressive.

她差點就成功了，那個後空翻，所以...滿厲害的

You know, I hate those kind of videos

你知道，我很討厭這種影片

that you never really get to see if they're okay.

因為你永遠都不知道他們到底有沒有怎樣

Some people think it's funny when children hurt themselves.

有些人認為小朋友自己弄受傷時很好笑

Like you, for example.

舉例來說，就像你這樣

(girl) Go!

(女孩）去吧！

(girl) Bwah!

(女孩）噗哇！

-(Anthony snickers) -My favorite video in the world.

-（安東尼在竊笑） - 這世界上我最愛的影片

(girl) Go!

（女孩）去吧！

(girl) Bwah!

（女孩）噗哇！

Oh...baby!

噢...寶貝！

(girl) Go!

(女孩）去吧！

(girl) Bwah!

（女孩）噗哇！

(laughs)

(笑）

You just face planted. (laughs)

你的臉直接撞到地板（笑）

Remember, you said that you wanted people to react to that.

還記得你說你想看大家對這個影片的反應嗎

-Yes! -Yeah.

- 太棒了！ - 對啊

Yes!

噢耶！

Panda! Oh my gosh, panda!

貓熊！我的天哪，貓熊！

I love pandas. Oh, and it's the little baby--(gasp).

我超愛貓熊 噢，還有一隻小寶...（驚嚇）

Oh, it's so cute!

噢！這太可愛了！

It's, like, one of the most classic videos on the internet.

這是網路上最經典的影片之一

I've never seen these!

我從來沒看過這個！

That is adorable.

這好可愛

-What was that? -(Finebros) Have you not seen that before?

- 這是什麼？ -（Finebros）你看過這個嗎？

I've never seen that.

從來沒有

I've watched "Sneezing Panda" probably, in my life, more than 100 times.

我人生中大概看過「噴嚏貓熊」不下100次吧

-I haven't seen this one. -I've seen this one.

- 我沒看過這個欸 - 我看過了

Oh! Jesus.

噢！老天

(laughs) Why would she do that?

（笑）她為什麼要這樣？

(laughs) Well, that escalated!

（笑）這個升級了！

(gasp)

（倒抽一口氣）

She's just not even in pain. She's just in awe.

她甚至沒有覺得痛，她只是很驚恐

She's like..."That just happened?"

她整個...「剛剛發生了什麼事？」

Um, is this going to take long?

呃，這會很久嗎

Oh, I love this video!

噢，我超愛這部影片的！

Oh! I've seen this one!

噢！我看過這個！

-No way. -(woman) Oh my [bleep].

- 不會吧 -（女生）我的老天

(laughs)

（笑）

-Oh, she's going to--NO! -(girl) Holy [bleep]

- 噢，她要...不！ -（女孩）這什麼糞事！

Ew! Oh my--wait. Is that real?

噁！老天...等等，這是真的嗎？

I mean, you can tell that's effects.

我是說，這很明顯是做出來的

-(girl) Holy [bleep] -I like how she says, "Oh [bleep]."

-（女孩）這什麼糞事！ - 我喜歡她說「這什麼糞事！」

It's like, yes, that is.

對啊，就是糞

She gave birth. Water birth.

她生小孩了，水中分娩

It's healthy. It's what Katie Holmes did.

這很健康，凱蒂·赫爾姆斯就是這樣

These are some of my, like, favorite videos I think I've ever seen.

這有些是我看過最喜歡的影片

That's the definition of YouTube.

這就是YouTube

-(Finebros) What did all these videos have in common?

-（Finebros）這些影片有什麼共同點？

They're all old!

他們都很老舊！

They were short and funny.

他們都簡短又好笑

Short, quick clips that are the definition of YouTube in '05, '06.

詮釋了05、06年的YouTube的簡短、快速影片

They all made me hard. (chuckles)

他們都讓我硬了（輕笑）

-(Finebros) And why do videos that are so short sometimes go the most viral?

-（Finebros）那為什麼這麼短的影片有時候卻最被傳閱？

People have short attention spans.

大家的注意力都很短暫

Because people have no attention spans.

因為大家都沒辦法長期注意力集中

So they see the video and they see the time is, like, two seconds...

所以當他們看到影片只有兩秒之類的

and they're like, "Oh. Okay. I can work that in."

就會「噢，OK，點來看看吧」

If they see a video that's two minutes, it's like, "Ugh. It's too much work."

如果他們看到一部影片有兩分鐘，就會「呃、要花太多時間了」

Just [bleep] in the tub and get out.

他們只想速戰速決

Who has time to sit and watch, like, a super long video?

誰會時間坐下來看一部超級長的影片啊？

I like things to be quick, you know?

我喜歡快速的東西，你懂嗎？

-Well, not everything. -(Finebros laughs)

- 呃，不是所有東西啦 -（Finebros笑）

I like--I like things to be quick.

反正就是，我喜歡快速的東西

I think it's probably just the easiest to share.

我想大概是因為它很好分享吧

You don't have to be involved at all.

你不需要融入其中

You replay it over and over and that's why it generates so many views.

你可以一再地重播，這就是為什麼它有那麼高的點閱率

I think there's brain chemistry.

我想這跟大腦有關

I think that there's a release of hormones that happens

我想當你看到有人受傷、或是什麼東西特別可愛時

when you see someone get injured, or something exceptionally cute.

大腦中會分泌一些賀爾蒙

There's something endearing about it in that some really great things...

一個那麼短暫、簡單的東西

can come from something so short and so simple that we all can laugh,

卻可以帶來那麼美好的事物、讓我們大笑一番

enjoy and watch it over and over and over again.

然後一再的回味，這是一件很棒的事

(Finebros) So let's talk about them. That animal that did that dramatic turn.

（Finebros）我們來談談剛剛的影片，那個戲劇性轉身的動物

(Finebros) What kind of animal is that?

（Finebros）那是什麼動物？

Uh...oh...[bleep] me.

呃...噢...天哪

-A hamster? -(buzzer goes off)

- 倉鼠？ -（答錯音效）

-Is it a chipmunk? -(buzzer goes off)

- 那是隻花栗鼠嗎？ -（答錯音效）

-A squirrel? -(buzzer goes off)

- 松鼠？ -（答錯音效）

-Gopher. -(buzzer goes off)

- 地鼠 -（答錯音效）

-Groundhog? -(buzzer goes off twice)

- 土撥鼠？ -（答錯音效兩次）

-Hamster. (laughs) -(buzzer goes off three times)

- 倉鼠（笑） -（答錯音效三次）

Well, I know they call it "The Dramatic Chipmunk",

我知道這影片叫做「戲劇性的花栗鼠」

-...but it was really a prairie dog? -(bell dings)

- ...但是牠真的是隻草原土撥鼠嗎？ -（答對音效）

-A panda. -What? No. Prairie dog.

- 貓熊 - 什麼？不是，是草原土撥鼠

Oh, I thought you were talking about the panda doing a dramatic turn at the--

噢，我以為你在說那個戲劇性看著他小孩的貓熊

(Finebros laughs) No!

（Finebros）不是！

I thought it was a panda!

我以為那是貓熊！

-(Finebros) Can you recreate it for us? -Okay.

-（Finebros）你可以模仿給我們看嗎？ - 好啊

(dramatic music plays)

（戲劇性的音樂）

Dun dun! (laughs)

登登！（笑）

-Are you hard? -(Finebros and Shane laugh)

- 你硬了嗎？ -（Finebros跟Shane笑）

-(Finebros) And the breakdancer? -Well, he was breakdancing...

-（Finebros）那個breaking舞者呢？ - 呃，他在跳breaking...

..and just kicked some little kid in the face.

...然後就朝一個小孩的臉踢了一腳

A little girl got punted...

一個小女孩被像球一樣踢了

which is what happens when you get into a breakdance fight.

這就是你捲入breaking舞pk的下場

That's what happens.

就是這樣

It lets you know how much power and force goes into a breakdance move.

這讓你知道breaking舞的動作有多有力

She kind of deserves it for interrupting the arts.

她有點活該，誰叫她干擾他們的藝術

I kind of knew that was going to happen because...

我有點猜到這會發生，因為...

..you know, all those dancing clips-- either a kid gets hit or something is broken.

...你知道的，這種跳舞影片都...不是有小孩被打到、就是有東西被弄壞

(Finebros) And what happened in the one where the girl fell down?

（Finebros）那跌倒的那個女孩發生了什麼事？

That was horrible.

那個很慘

She face-planted. It was just straight up-- dog, taking it for a walk.

她的臉撞地板，就是直接的...狗狗，帶牠去遛一遛

Well, guess what? Dog took her for a walk, if you know what I mean!

結果猜猜怎麼樣？是那隻狗帶她去遛一遛，如果你懂我的意思！

It's one of my favorite videos because... (laughs)...

這是我最喜歡的影片之一，因為...（笑）

no matter how many times they hit the replay button, like,

不管重播了多少次

I just get so much satisfaction out of it.

我就是可以從中獲得很大的滿足

There's so many questions too. You're like, "Did she get hurt?"

有很多針對這個的問題，像是「她有受傷嗎？」

"Were her parents there? Who was filming?"

「她的父母在哪？是誰在拍影片？」

-What was she throwing? -(Anthony laughs)

- 她在丟什麼？ -（Anthony笑）

(Finebros) Why do we all laugh at this girl?

（Finebros）為什麼我們都要笑這個女孩？

Because it's shocking!

因為很意外啊！

I think it's partly because she is the instrument of her own demise.

我想有一部分是因為這個悲劇是她自己造成的

It's a [inaudible] Froden (becomes tongue tied). A German word, right?

這是個Froden...（舌頭打結）這是個德文單字，對吧？

[DeFranco tries to say "schadenfreude"]

[DeFranco試著念schadenfreude（幸災樂禍）]

I think it's the noise.

我想是聲音的關係

"Go!" and then--blegh!

「去吧！」然後...噗呃！

-Blah! -B--no, it's not "bah!" It's "Bweeeeh!"

- 噗啦！ -噗...不，不是「吧！」是「噗欸欸！」

-Oh, sorry. -Yeah.

- 噢，抱歉 - 是啊

It's a little bit--yeah, it's important.

這有點...對，很重要

(Finebros) What happened with those pandas?

(Finebros）那些貓熊怎麼了？

The pandas! I love pandas.

那個貓熊！我超愛貓熊！

Jump scare sneeze. They're scary.

嚇到跳起來的噴嚏，牠們好可怕

The little one sneezed and the big one moved.

那隻小的打噴嚏，然後大隻的動了一下

And it got 100 million views.

然後點閱數就破億了

That's, like, the classic one that I feel like has been parodied the most...

這跟其他影片比起來是由史以來

out of any video ever.

最常被搞笑模仿的經典影片

It's cute, but on, like, several levels.

這很可愛，可是是從一些不同層面上來說

First, there's a baby panda sneezing.

首先，有隻貓熊寶寶打噴嚏了

Second, mom apparently has never heard a baby panda sneeze,

接著，那個媽媽顯然沒聽過貓熊寶寶打噴嚏

just like we haven't!

就像我們也沒聽過一樣

(Finebros) And what about the woman that punched the other woman in the face?

（Finebros）那一個女人被另一個女人揍臉的影片呢？

I think that other woman was being a bitch.

我覺得那個女人是個婊子

And I think that old lady had to show her "the business."

而另一個女人只是在給他一點教訓

I don't even think that girl knew why she got punched.

我覺得那個女的根本不知道為什麼自己被揍

It seemed like it just came out of nowhere.

就是沒來由的一拳

I think the funniest part is the fact that you don't know why she punched her.

我覺得最好笑的是那個根本不知道為什麼被揍的表情

-Yeah. -I keep replaying it, like, trying

- 對啊 - 我一直重播

to read it in their face.

試圖解讀他們的表情

Most of your life, right, it's just, "Blah blah blah. Blah blah blah."

你人生中大部分時候就是「Blah blah blah. Blah blah blah」

"Oh, oh." And then, like, normal society holds people back...

「噢、噢」然後社會就會將你們拉回來

but then when you get hit in the face for the first time, you're like,

可是當你真的被揍一拳時，你才會想

"So that's what that feels like! [bleep]"

「所以後果就是這樣！夭壽！」

(Finebros) And the Jacuzzi. What happened there?

（Finebros）那個熱水池，發生了什麼事？

She pooped herself.

她拉屎了

The girl had the Hershey squirts.

那個女孩噴出巧克力

The poor girl's ruined forever. Like, at that point, you just move.

那個女孩這輩子都毀了，在那個時間點，你就是離開、接受

Except, now the internet exists and it doesn't matter where she goes.

現在網路這麼發達，不管她躲到哪裡都沒差了

I think that one's fake.

我覺得那個是假的

It's fake. I've pooped in a lot of Jacuzzis.

假的，我自己在很多熱水池都拉過屎

And it doesn't ooze out like that...like a cartoon.

它不會像那樣...像卡通那樣滲出

I don't know who, or why, they would have done that,

五不知道是誰、或為何他們要這麼做

but I think it's fake.

但是我覺得是假的

I've never pooped in a pool so I wouldn't know.

我從來沒在熱水池拉屎過，所以我不知道

I might want to try that.

我也許會想試試看

Just to see, just to check the legitimacy of the video. (laughs)

就為了看看這部影片的真實性（笑）

(Finebros) What would you have done if you were in the Jacuzzi?

（Finebros）如果你也在那個熱水池裡，你會怎麼做？

Well, I would have probably been the one pooping myself so...

呃，我應該會是拉屎的那一個，所以...

that would have been me.

我就會跟那個人一樣

Get the [bleep] out.

天殺的跑出去

You run or you vomit.

你不是跑就是吐

I would be running and then I'd be, like, scrubbing myself down

我會跑走，而且會用抗菌肥皂

with anti-bacterial soap.

把全身刷一遍

I would have done a scuba. You know? YOLO, right?

我會淺水下去，你知道，人生只有一回，是吧？

I might dunk one of my friends in the water...

我大概會在他們起身逃走之前

just before jumping out.

把其中一個朋友壓進水裡

People who are watching out there: if you're having cramps, get out of the hot tub.

正在看這個的各位聽好：如果你肚子痛，就快點離開熱水池

Do not be ashamed of your digestive needs.

不要為了生理需求而感到丟臉

(Finebros) People end up remixing their own versions of viral videos...

（Finebros）大家最後開始把一些病毒影片集合成一部自己的版本

..even some from the ones we've showed you.

包括我們剛剛給你們看的

Why is that something that people do?

為什麼大家要這麼做？

Because people are not creative and they're like,

因為大家都很沒創意，就覺得

"Oh. I'll just rip off this other thing."

「噢，我就把這些偷走弄成其他東西」

They want to ride on the coattails, man.

他們想要搭順風車

You know, they want to take something that has gotten popular...

你知道，他們想要拿那些變得很熱門的東西

..and they're going, "I can make it better!"

然後想「我可以把它變得更好！」

I think it's just inserting yourself into something that's already awesome.

我想就是把自己變成原本就已經很酷的東西的一份子

Everything, in general, in terms of entertainment, isn't original.

一般來說，提到娛樂，沒有任何東西是原創的

I think everything's a copy of something somewhere...

我覺得所有東西都是從某處抄襲而來的...

..because we had to learn it somewhere, you know?

...因為我們需要先從別處學到這個，你懂嗎？

So...um...in terms of remixing, I think it's just another art.

所以..呃...就集結影片來說，我覺得就只是另一種藝術表現

People love to create.

大家都愛創作

The internet just fosters that remix culture,

網路就是在鼓勵集合這種東西

which is one of the coolest things about the internet.

而這也是網路最酷的地方

(Finebros) So what is the perfect short viral video?

（Finebros）所以什麼是完美的極短病毒影片？

Well, if I had one, I would have made it already.

呃，如果我知道，我早就自己拍一部了

I'm not good at this! I don't do the viral video thing,

我對這個很不在行！我不會拍病毒影片

I just watch them and enjoy them.

我只會看，然後享受它

If I had an idea for a perfect ten second video, I wouldn't tell you!

如果我有一個超棒的10秒鐘影片的點子，才不會告訴你！

Myself, with Ray and Jenna and Smosh, all in a Jacuzzi,

我、Ray、Jenna跟Smosh，全都在熱水池裡

and we all just let loose.

然後我們全都放鬆括約肌

Watch...uh...what is it? The five of us poo!

看著...呃...多少？我們五個人拉屎！

I'm pretty sure that would go a little viral.

我滿確定這會變得有一點點熱門

I mean, I'd share it because I'm in it!

我是說，我會因為自己在裡面而到處分享！

Thanks for watching another episode of YouTubers React.

謝謝收看這集YouTubers React

We'll be back soon, so make sure that you subscribe to all the channels.

我們很快就會回來，所以確認你有訂閱這些頻道

I love your faces and I'll see you next time.

我愛你的臉，我們下次見

Bye!

掰！

Bye!

掰！