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  • Good afternoon, it's February seventh, 2012.

    下午好,今天是2012年2月7日。

  • This was from my daughter, Hannah.

    這是我女兒漢娜送的。

  • And more importantly, for all her friends on Facebook

    更重要的是,對於她在Facebook上的所有朋友來說

  • who thought that her little rebellious post was cute,

    誰覺得她的小叛逆帖很可愛。

  • and for all you parents out there that think your kids

    和所有你的父母在那裡認為你的孩子

  • don't post bad things on Facebook, well, I want to read

    不要在臉書上發壞事,好吧,我想看看

  • you one I took off my daughter's Facebook wall, that

    你一個我從我女兒的臉書牆上拿下來的,那是

  • she thought she was being smart by blocking her parents

    她自以為聰明地屏蔽了她的父母。

  • from being able to see it.

    從能夠看到它。

  • Hannah, you were grounded for about three months

    漢娜,你被禁足了大約三個月。

  • for doing something very similar to this, and I would have thought

    因為做的事情與此非常相似,我認為

  • with a father that worked in IT for a living,

    與父親在IT行業工作為生。

  • you'd have better sense than to do it again.

    你最好不要再這麼做了。

  • But I just spent about six hours yesterday

    但我昨天花了六個小時

  • fixing your computer for you, upgrading it for you,

    替你修電腦,替你升級。

  • spent about a hundred thirty dollars on software.

    在軟件上花了大約一百三十元。

  • And today, I run across a post on your Facebook page

    今天,我在你的Facebook頁面上看到了一篇文章。

  • that you didn't think I'd be able to see.

    你以為我看不出來嗎?

  • So since you want to hide it from everyone,

    所以既然你想瞞著大家。

  • I'm going to share it with everybody.

    我要和大家分享。

  • This is called, "To My Parents", by the way.

    對了,這叫,《致我的父母》。

  • To my parents: I'm not your damn slave.

    敬我父母我不是你該死的奴隸。

  • It's not my responsibility to clean up your shit.

    清理你的糞便不是我的責任。

  • We have a cleaning lady for a reason.

    我們有一個清潔女工是有原因的。

  • Her name is Linda, not Hannah.

    她的名字是琳達,不是漢娜。

  • If you want coffee, get off your ass and

    如果你想喝咖啡,就趕緊滾蛋吧

  • make it yourself.

    自己做。

  • If you want a garden, shovel the fertilizer yourself.

    如果你想要一個花園,就自己鏟肥。

  • Don't sit back on your ass and watch me do it.

    不要坐視不理,看我動手。

  • If you walk in the house and get mud all over

    如果你走在屋子裡,弄得滿身泥濘

  • the floor that I just cleaned, be my guest, but clean

    我剛剛打掃過的地板,請自便,但要打掃乾淨。

  • it up after you're done getting shit everywhere.

    在你把屎弄得到處都是後,它。

  • I'm tired of picking up after you.

    我已經厭倦了跟在你後面撿東西。

  • You tell me at least once a day that I need

    你每天至少告訴我一次,我需要。

  • to get a job.

    來找工作。

  • I love this part.

    我喜歡這部分。

  • You could just pay me for all the shit I do around the house.

    你可以付給我所有我在家裡做的事情。

  • Seriously? Are you kidding me?

    真的嗎?你在開玩笑嗎?

  • I'll get to that in a minute.

    我馬上就會說到的。

  • Every day when I get home from school, I have to

    每天放學回家後,我都要...

  • do dishes, clean the countertops, all the floors,

    洗碗,清潔檯面,所有的地面。

  • make all the beds, do the laundry, and get the trash.

    把所有的床鋪整理好,洗好衣服,把垃圾倒掉。

  • I'm not even going to mention all the work I do around your clinic.

    我甚至不打算提我在你診所周圍做的所有工作。

  • And if I don't do all that everyday, I get grounded.

    如果我每天不做這些事,我就會被禁足。

  • You know how hard it is to keep up with chores and schoolwork?

    你知道要跟上家務和功課有多難嗎?

  • It's freaking crazy.

    這真是太瘋狂了。

  • I go to bed at ten every night because

    我每天晚上十點睡覺,因為

  • I'm too tired to stay up any longer doing anything else.

    我太累了,不能再熬夜做別的事了。

  • I have to get up at five in the morning to get ready

    我早上五點就得起床準備了

  • for school.

    為學校。

  • On the weekends I have to sleep with my door locked

    週末的時候,我得鎖著門睡覺。

  • so my little brother won't come get me up at six.

    這樣我的弟弟就不會在六點來接我起床了。

  • That part's true.

    那部分是真的。

  • "This is all true." That's what she's saying.

    "這都是真的。"她就是這麼說的。

  • And I'm tired of this bullshit.

    我已經厭倦了這些廢話。

  • Next time I have to pour a cup of coffee

    下一次我得倒一杯咖啡了

  • I'm gonna flip shit.

    我要去翻個底朝天

  • I have no idea how I have a life.

    我不知道自己是怎麼生活的。

  • I'm gonna hate to see the day when you get too old

    我不想看到你太老的那一天。

  • to wipe your ass and you call me asking for help.

    擦你的屁股,你打電話給我 求助。

  • I won't be there.

    我不會去的

  • Signed, your pissed kid, Hannah.

    簽名,你生氣的孩子,漢娜。

  • I'm going to address a couple of these.

    我要解決其中的幾個問題。

  • We have a lady that cleans the house for us

    我們有一位女士,她為我們打掃房間。

  • as a favor to trade off some services.

    作為交換一些服務的好處。

  • She is not, and you will never again refer to her

    她不是,你也不會再提到她了

  • as a cleaning lady.

    作為一個清潔女工。

  • That lady works harder in one day than you ever have

    那位女士一天的工作比你更辛苦。

  • in your life.

    在你的生活中。

  • Pay you? For the chores you--seriously? Pay you for chores?!

    給你錢?為你做的家務活... 真的嗎?給你錢做家務?

  • That you're supposed to do around the house?

    你應該在家裡做的事?

  • You come home from school, you have a list of chores

    你放學回家,你有一個家務事的清單。

  • that are on the wall because you can't remember them

    因為你不記得它們了

  • if you don't.

    如果你不這樣做。

  • They are: sweep the living room and kitchen floor,

    它們是:清掃客廳和廚房地面。

  • which total will take you about three minutes.

    這總共需要你三分鐘左右。

  • If the countertops are dirty, wipe them down, which takes

    如果檯面髒了,就把檯面擦乾淨,這就需要

  • about a minute.

    大約一分鐘。

  • If the dishwasher's full, and been run, empty it, and put the dishes away.

    如果洗碗機滿了,並且已經運行了,就把它清空,然後把盤子收起來。

  • If it's not, just be sure all the glasses and stuff are

    如果不是,只要確定所有的眼鏡和東西都是。

  • in the dishwasher.

    在洗碗機中。

  • If you have any laundry of your own, do it.

    如果你有什麼自己的衣物,就去做吧。

  • And if your bed is unmade, do it.

    如果你的床沒有鋪好,就去做。

  • You don't have to do my laundry.

    你不必幫我洗衣服。

  • You don't have to make my bed.

    你不必給我鋪床。

  • You don't have to make the guest bed.

    你不一定要把客人的床鋪好。

  • You have to make your own bed.

    你得自己鋪床。

  • Once a month or so, I guess, you probably have to make

    一個月左右的時間,我想,你可能要讓

  • the guest bed.

    客人的床。

  • Pay you, for chores? Are you out of your mind?

    給你錢,做家務?你瘋了嗎?

  • You're fifteen, going on sixteen years old!

    你才15歲,馬上就要16歲了!你知道嗎?

  • You want things for your laptop?

    你想為你的筆記本買東西?

  • You want a new battery, you want a new cord,

    你想換電池,就得換新線。

  • you want a new camera, you want a new phone,

    你想要一個新的相機,你想要一個新的手機。

  • you want a new iPod, but you won't

    你想要一個新的iPod,但你不會。

  • get off your lazy ass to get--to even look for a job!

    讓你的懶惰的屁股得到 - 甚至找工作!

  • The only job that you've applied to is the one

    你唯一應聘過的工作就是那個

  • I made you apply to, because I got the application for you.

    我讓你去申請,因為我幫你申請到了。

  • [crumples paper]

    [皺紙]

  • And you've been too lazy to even carry that back.

    而你卻連這東西都懶得背。

  • When I was your age, I'd moved out of the house,

    當我在你這個年紀的時候,我已經搬出了家。

  • lived on my own, went to college, while in high school,

    自己住,上了大學,在高中時。

  • worked two jobs, was a volunteer fireman, and still

    打過兩份工,當過義務消防員,現在還是

  • went to school.

    上學了。

  • Your responsibilities include waking up on time

    你的職責包括準時起床

  • and getting on the bus.

    並上了公車。

  • That's the end of your responsibilities each day.

    你每天的責任就到此為止了。

  • You don't have that hard of a life.

    你的生活沒有那麼艱難。

  • But you're about to.

    但你即將。

  • I warned you months ago about what would happen

    我幾個月前就警告過你會發生什麼事

  • if you did something like this on Facebook again.

    如果你再在Facebook上做這樣的事情。

  • The last time you were grounded, and quite frankly,

    上一次你被禁足,而且很坦率地說。

  • I forget now, but it was for something fairly childish and stupid,

    我現在忘了,但那是為了一些相當幼稚和愚蠢的事情。

  • we took away the computer, that kind of thing, no cellphone,

    我們拿走了電腦,那種東西,沒有手機。

  • no Facebook, and I told you, if it ever happened again,

    沒有Facebook,我告訴你, 如果它再次發生,

  • that it'd be a lot worse.

    這將是一個更糟糕的。

  • And I was really close that day to putting a bullet

    而我那天真的很接近把一粒子彈

  • through your laptop.

    通過你的筆記本電腦。

  • Now, this time, I just spent all day yesterday, blew half my day,

    現在,這個時候,我昨天才花了一整天的時間,吹了半天。

  • upgrading your laptop, putting new software on it, spent about

    升級你的筆記本,裝上新的軟件,花了大約1個月的時間。

  • a hundred thirty bucks in software to get everything

    一百三十塊錢的軟件,以獲得一切

  • the way that you want to have it for school.

    你想要的方式有它的學校。

  • You don't have to worry about buying a new laptop battery,

    您不必為購買新的筆記本電池而煩惱。

  • you don't have to worry about buying a new power cord,

    您不必擔心購買新的電源線。

  • you don't have to worry about buying a new camera.

    你不必擔心購買新相機。

  • Because you won't be using any of them, until probably college.

    因為你在可能上大學之前,都不會用到它們。

  • I don't know how to say how disappointed I am in you,

    我不知道該怎麼說我對你有多失望。

  • and how disrespectful you were to every single adult

    你對每一個成年人都是多麼的不尊重。

  • in your life, but kid, you got it easy.

    在你的生活中,但孩子,你得到了它容易。

  • Way easy. It's about to get harder.

    很容易。這是要變得更難。

  • It's about to get a whole lot harder.

    這將會變得更加困難。

  • Today.

    今天的。

  • Because you're not going to see this, and for all I know,

    因為你不會看到這個,而且據我所知。

  • you might not ever see it. But as soon as I'm done,

    你可能永遠不會看到它。但一旦我完成了,

  • I'm going to post this on your Facebook wall, so all those kids

    我要把這個貼在你的臉書上,讓所有的孩子都知道

  • that thought it was cool for how rebellious you were,

    認為這是很酷的,因為你是多麼的叛逆。

  • can see what happens.

    可以看到會發生什麼。

  • And all the parents may get an idea to put a bullet up

    所有的父母可能會有一個想法,把子彈打上去。

  • their own kid's ass.

    他們自己孩子的屁股。

  • Because all this--I mean, there was more curse words

    因為這些... 我的意思是,有更多的咒語。

  • in that one post--just ridiculous!

    在那一個帖子 - 只是荒謬的!

  • Not happening. Disrespectful to me, your mother,

    不可能不尊重我,你的母親。

  • your stepmother, your family, your friends, and yourself.

    你的繼母、你的家人、你的朋友和你自己。

  • So, I'm going to put a stop to it.

    所以,我要制止它。

  • And I'm going to put a stop to it right now.

    我現在就去制止它。

  • That right there is your laptop.

    那就是你的筆記本電腦。

  • You see it's out here on the ground.

    你看這是在外面的地面上。

  • This right here is my .45.

    這是我的點45

  • [gunshot]

    [槍聲]

  • That was the first round.

    那是第一輪。

  • [gunshot]

    [槍聲]

  • These are exploding hollow-point rounds from--

    這些是爆炸的空心彈,從... ...

  • and you have to pay me back for these, too, because

    你也要把這些錢還給我,因為。

  • these about a dollar apiece.

    這些大約一美元一個。

  • [four gunshots]

    [四聲槍響]

  • One two three four five six. Oh yeah, and after

    一二三四五六哦,對了,之後

  • that comment you made about your mom, your mom

    你對你媽媽的評論,你的媽媽。

  • told me to be sure I put one in there for her, so...

    叫我一定要放一個給她,所以... ...

  • [gunshot] That one's for her.

    [槍聲]這一個是為她。

  • And if I got one left [gunshot], I got two left! [gunshot]

    如果我得到了一個左[槍擊], 我得到了兩個左![槍聲]

  • Now I'm out.

    現在我出來了。

  • So, just for the record, whenever you're not grounded,

    所以,聲明一下,只要你不接地氣。

  • whatever year that happens to be, you can a have a new

    不管是哪一年,你都可以有一個新的。

  • laptop when you buy a new laptop.

    筆記本電腦,當你購買一臺新的筆記本電腦。

  • And when you pay me back for the hundred thirty dollars

    等你把那一百三十塊錢還給我的時候

  • I spent on yours yesterday.

    我昨天花在你的身上了。

  • Hope you've enjoyed your little fiasco on Facebook.

    希望你喜歡你在Facebook上的小慘劇。

  • Hope it was worth all this.

    希望這一切是值得的。

  • Have a good day, y'all.

    祝你們今天過得愉快

Good afternoon, it's February seventh, 2012.

下午好,今天是2012年2月7日。

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A2 初級 中文 美國腔 筆記本 漢娜 槍聲 家務 電腦 臉書

Youtube 2012前十大影片-臉書教養兒女:致問題青少年 (Facebook Parenting: For the troubled teen)

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    Zenn 發佈於 2013 年 03 月 05 日
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