Uh...Well, depends on the starting salary.

呃......那得看起薪是多少了。

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

哈，哈，哈，哈，哈，哈，哈，哈，哈，哈，哈。

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

哈，哈，哈，哈，哈，哈，哈，哈。

You're funny. Have a seat.

你真有趣請坐

Okay, shall we?

好吧，我們開始吧？

Alright, I just buttered her up.

好了，我剛給她塗了黃油

Logic, confidence, you know what to do, right?

邏輯、自信，你知道該怎麼做，對嗎？

Yes, sir, I have all the answers right here.

是的，先生，我這裡有所有的答案。

The probability of achieving a successful interview with confidence is about 98 percent.

自信面試成功的概率約為 98%。

Yeah, yeah, yeah, we've been working together on this all week.

是啊，是啊，是啊，我們整個星期都在一起工作。

Don't worry, we got this.

別擔心，我們能行。

Alright, sounds like a plan.

好吧，聽起來像是個計劃。

Aroused? What the hell are you doing here?

興奮嗎？你在這裡幹什麼？

Oh, I thought I was called in for something.

哦，我還以為我被叫去做什麼事了。

No, we don't need you here right now.

不，我們現在不需要你。

Oh, I see why.

哦，我知道為什麼了。

No, no, get the hell out of here.

不，不，快離開這裡。

We need complete focus on this mission.

我們需要全神貫注於這項任務。

Okay, okay, damn.

好吧，好吧，該死的。

Okay, where were we?

好吧，我們說到哪兒了？

Wait, where did this confidence go?

等等，這種自信去哪兒了？

I believe he went to the bathroom.

我相信他去了洗手間。

Damn, I love you.

該死，我愛你

We don't have time for breaks right now.

我們現在沒時間休息。

So, tell me about yourself.

那麼，跟我說說你自己吧。

Oh, okay, um, well, uh, I, uh, oh, oh, no, it's starting.

哦，好吧，呃，我，呃，哦，哦，不，開始了。

Logic, quit, do something.

邏輯，退出，做點什麼。

Um, uh, well, I have worked at my last company for over four years.

我在上一家公司工作了四年多。

I am proficient in Microsoft Word, Excel, and PowerPoint.

我精通 Microsoft Word、Excel 和 PowerPoint。

I am 30 years old, black, recently divorced.

我今年 30 歲，黑人，剛剛離婚。

What are you doing?

你在幹什麼？

You sound so robotic.

你聽起來太機械了。

This isn't a tech job.

這不是一份技術工作。

You know I can't process my thoughts properly without emotional support.

你知道，沒有情感上的支持，我無法正確處理自己的想法。

I know, I know, we're just understaffed right now.

我知道，我知道，我們現在人手不足。

I can help.

我可以幫忙。

Why are you still here?

你怎麼還在這裡？

Okay, stay.

好吧，留下來。

Why don't you just stop standing there and help me?

你為什麼不站在那兒幫幫我呢？

Fine.

很好

Um, how do you find yourself problem solving?

嗯，你覺得自己是如何解決問題的？

Oh, boy, I am a problem solving master.

哦，天哪，我真是個解決問題的高手。

I love problem solving.

我喜歡解決問題。

Ever since I was born, I problem solve.

從我出生開始，我就一直在解決問題。

Whenever I see a problem, I solve it.

只要我發現問題，我就會去解決。

I'm like you, you got a problem, I'll solve it.

我和你一樣，你有問題，我來解決。

That's what I'm talking about.

我說的就是這個意思。

I think you're giving her the magnifying glass.

我覺得你在拿放大鏡給她看。

Oh, Raph, if you do not leave, we're going to do a magnifying glass on you twice a week.

哦，拉斐爾，如果你不走，我們每週都要用放大鏡觀察你兩次。

I've got to find this damn confidence.

我得找回這該死的自信。

Anxiety, I need you to cover for me.

焦慮，我需要你幫我打掩護。

Well, wait, wait, no, no, no, no, why me?

等等，等等，不，不，不，不，不，為什麼是我？

Because you're the only one on the clock for some reason.

因為出於某種原因，只有你一個人在計時。

I need to take a soul off today.

我今天需要放個假。

I'll be back, and whatever you do, don't let arouse distract you.

我會回來的，不管你做什麼，別讓喚醒分散你的注意力。

What do you think your strengths and weaknesses are when it comes to the workplace?

您認為自己在職場中的優勢和劣勢是什麼？

Okay, okay, well, I, um, okay, let's just keep this rudimentary.

好吧，好吧，好吧，我，嗯，好吧，讓我們保持這個簡陋的。

Just follow this prompt word for word, and I think we can at least achieve a satisfactory result.

只要一字不差地按照這個提示去做，我想我們至少能取得一個令人滿意的結果。

Um, so how do you want me to interpret this?

你想讓我怎麼解釋？

What do you mean?

什麼意思？

Do you want this in order, up and down, left and right, just do it however you usually do it.

你想按順序、上下、左右這樣做嗎？

So, so you just want me to do it how I usually do it?

所以，你只是想讓我按照我通常的方式來做？

Yes, just do you, it's that simple.

是的，做你自己，就這麼簡單。

Okay, but because last time you yelled at me, and we got into this huge argument.

好吧，但因為上次你對我大吼大叫 我們吵得不可開交

You just stop over thinking.

你只需停止過度思考。

I just want to make sure I'm doing this right.

我只是想確保我這樣做是對的。

Can you just hurry up?

你能快點嗎？

He's looking like an idiot right now.

他現在看起來就像個白痴。

Okay, okay, okay, damn, stop yelling at me.

好了，好了，好了，該死的，別對我大喊大叫了。

Um, I, I could be too good at Excel, I, I guess, or wait, wait, no, that, that's strength.

嗯，我，我可能太擅長 Excel 了，我，我想，或者等等，等等，不，那是力量。

Um, I, hold on, what, what are you doing?

等等，你在幹什麼？

He's just babbling.

他只是在胡言亂語。

See, this is why we can never work together.

瞧，這就是我們永遠無法合作的原因。

You are making this more complicated than it needs to be.

你把事情搞得太複雜了。

I'm just doing this as you ask.

我只是按照你的要求來做。

Every time we work together, you're sniffing me.

每次我們一起工作，你都在聞我。

I'm sorry, I'm trying to keep things simple for you.

對不起，我只是想把事情簡單化。

One plus one equals two.

一加一等於二。

You're not even one of us, you're not an emotion.

你甚至不是我們中的一員，你不是一種情感。

Um.

嗯。

Are you okay?

你還好嗎？

Do you need some water or something?

你需要喝點水什麼的嗎？

No, no, no, I'm good, I'm good, I'm, um.

不，不，不，我很好，我很好，我，嗯。

No one likes you, no one likes you.

沒人喜歡你，沒人喜歡你。

You should be in the operating department.

你應該在手術部。

I'm still getting, why do we have to work together?

我還在想，為什麼我們要一起工作？

I'm back, I couldn't find him.

我回來了，我找不到他。

What did I miss?

我錯過了什麼？

So, I do want to let you know, we've had a lot of people apply for this position.

所以，我想讓你們知道，有很多人申請這個職位。

I've spoken to almost 45 applicants today alone.

僅今天一天，我就和將近 45 位申請者談過話。

I'm, I'm sorry, y'all.

我，我很抱歉，你們都。

Yeah, I'm sorry too.

是啊，我也很抱歉。

Let's just take this L and move on.

讓我們接受這個教訓，繼續前進吧。

I'm really not supposed to do this at this level of the interview process, but.

我真的不應該在面試過程中這樣做，但是。

When can you start?

什麼時候可以開始？

Sorry, I wouldn't have.

對不起，我沒有。

Get out of here!

離開這裡

Get the hell out of here, Confidence!

快滾吧，信心號

If you see a rival, tell them to get over here, we're celebrating!

如果你看到對手，告訴他們過來，我們正在慶祝！

I can start right away.

我可以馬上開始。

You've got the job.

你已經得到了這份工作。

What's your starting salary?

你的起薪是多少？

Why am I around?

我為什麼會在這裡？

I want to give a shout out to everyone who wanted a part two to my last video.

我想向想要我上一個視頻的第二部分的所有人致敬。

That video hit over a million views.

該視頻點擊量超過一百萬。

That's my first long form video that hit a million views.

這是我第一個點擊率達到一百萬的長視頻。

So, thank you guys so much for that.

所以，非常感謝你們。

Like always, if you have any other ideas, please comment below.

和往常一樣，如果您有任何其他想法，請在下面發表評論。

And if I like it and it sparks interest, then I'm going to see what I can do.

如果我喜歡它，它能激發我的興趣，那我就會去看看我能做些什麼。

And I'll give you guys a shout out if I make it.

如果我成功了，我會給你們點個讚的。

Alright guys, take it easy.

好了，夥計們，別緊張。

Love y'all, bye.

愛你們，再見。

Bye bye.

再見

You're funny.

你真有趣

We need a funny guy around the office.

我們辦公室需要一個有趣的人。

We need a little humor around the old office.

我們的老辦公室需要一點幽默感。

You're hired.

你被錄用了