Name: 封城之後，如何重建和人們的緊密關係？ (How to rebuild relationships after lockdown | BBC Ideas)
Uploaded: 2021-08-28T21:01:20.000Z
Duration: 5 min 20 s

基礎數量詞

When the coronavirus pandemic forced much of the world into lockdown, it highlighted what social creatures we humans are.

當冠狀病毒大流行迫使世界大部分地區進入封鎖狀態，它凸顯了我們人類是怎樣的一種社會生物。

過去簡單式

More than half of UK adults surveyed agreed that a reduction in social contact during lockdown made life harder.

超過一半的受訪英國成年人同意，在封鎖期間減少社會接觸使生活更加艱難。

to 不定詞

Social neuroscientist John Cacioppo argued that: "loneliness is an evolutionary signal telling us something is not right with your social environment, and that you need to do something about it, fast".

社會神經科學家 John Cacioppo 認為：「孤獨是一種進化的信號，告訴我們你的社會環境有些不對勁。 而且你需要快速地做些什麼來改變它。」

Having really good relationships in your life is fundamental to your personal well-being.

在生活中擁有真正良好的關係是個人幸福的基礎。

And being able to reach out to people who really care about you is so important.

並且能夠接觸到真正關心你的人是如此重要。

So why does maintaining friendships and relationships sometimes feel so hard?

那麼，為什麼維持友誼和關係有時覺得很辛苦？

We can all strengthen the relationships we have in our lives as well as creating quality new ones.

我們都可以加強我們生活中的關係以及創造高質量的新產品。

Here are some tips to help you connect better with those around you.

這裡有一些提示，可以幫助你更好地與你周圍的人聯繫。

It's all very well being interesting, but it's equally important to be interested in what other people have got to say to you.

這一切都很有趣，但同樣重要的是要對其他人所說的話感興趣。

So really listening helps people to feel more valued.

是以，真正的傾聽有助於讓人們感到更有價值。

Active listening is a skill, one we can all practice and get better at.

積極傾聽是一種技能，一個我們都可以練習並變得更擅長的方法。

When you're in a conversation, non-verbal signs such as eye contact, mirroring and nodding all help create a positive environment.

當你在談話中，諸如眼神接觸、模仿和點頭等的非語言記號都有助於創造出一個正向的環境。

Asking questions for clarification and paraphrasing and reflecting back what is said also shows that you're really trying to understand what someone is saying.

提出問題要求澄清並轉述和反思對方所講的內容，也表明你真的在努力理解別人說的話。

Being an active listener means that you recognize the conversation is more about the other person than about you.

成為一個積極的傾聽者意味著你能認識到對話更多的是關於對方，而不是關於你。

Sometimes you can feel lonely even though there are people around you.

有時你會感到孤獨，儘管你周圍有人。

Making sure that the time you spend with other people is of good quality can help combat those feelings.

確保你與其他人相處的時間是高質量的，這可以幫助抵抗孤獨感。

Switch off the television, play some games, cook together, communicate, really talk to each other, and spend that time together.

關掉電視、玩一些遊戲、一起做飯、溝通、真正與對方交談，並一起度過那段時光。

Whether we feel happy and connected with our loved ones may depend on the activities we do together.

我們是否感到幸福並與所愛的人緊密連結，可能取決於我們一起做的活動。

One study found that our happiness and feelings of closeness are more to do with different types of activities we do with friends and family members as opposed to the relationships themselves.

一項研究發現，我們的幸福感和親近感與朋友和家人所做的不同類型的活動更加相關，而非關係本身。

One distraction that often gets in the way is your mobile phone.

一個經常令人分心的東西就是你的手機。

Very often we can be in conversation with people and we're not absolutely present.

經常我們可以在與人交談時心不在焉。

So putting the mobile technology away is a really good way to create that connection.

所以把移動技術收起來是建立這種聯繫的一個非常好的方法。

Another skill that can help is talking openly.

另一個可以有所幫助的技巧是公開地談論。

Author Susan Scott wrote: "Never be afraid of the conversations you're having. Be afraid of the conversations you're not having".

作者蘇珊・斯科特寫道：「永遠不要害怕你正在進行的對話。該恐懼的是你沒有進行的對話。」

If there's things that you feel frustrated about and you need to get off your chest, it's a really good idea to talk about them rather than let them fester.

如果有什麼事情讓你感到沮喪而你需要發洩一下，談論這些問題會是個好主意，而不是讓它們發酵。

Often we might not want to talk because we are afraid we might upset the other person or damage our relationship with them, and sometimes we just don't know how to raise an issue skillfully.

很多時候，我們可能不想說話因為我們害怕會讓對方不高興，或損害與他們的關係。 而有時我們只是不知道如何巧妙地提出問題。

So firstly, ask yourself: "What's really bothering me?"

是以，首先要問自己。「真正困擾我的是什麼？」

You can bring it up in an open and respectful way with phrases like: "I have a concern" or "This is how I feel when..."

你可以以一種開放和尊重的方式，用「我有一個擔憂」或「當......，我會有這樣的感覺」這兩種句型提出來。

Listen to the other person's thoughts and genuinely try to understand where they are coming from.

傾聽對方的想法並真誠地嘗試理解他們的想法。

Asking: "I am curious to understand why...",  or "Why do you say this?" can really help with that.

詢問「我很想了解為什麼...」或「你為什麼這麼說？」真的可以有所幫助。

And don't forget to tell people how much you care about them, how important they are to you, and how much you value them.

不要忘記告訴人們你是多麼關心他們，他們對你有多重要，你有多重視他們。

It's also important to bear in mind that you are never going to change anybody, but the only person that you can really change is yourself.

牢記以下幾點也很重要，你永遠無法改變任何人，但你唯一能真正改變的人是你自己。

So sometimes, rather than focusing on all the things that irritate you about somebody, it's important to focus on their strengths.

所以有時候，與其把注意力放在某人讓你生氣的事情上，更重要的是要關注他們的長處。

Another thing that can help you really connect with others is kindness.

另一件可以幫助你真正與他人聯繫的事情是是善良。

Studies have found that being kind to others is linked to increased feelings of happiness, well-being, and life satisfaction.

研究發現，善待他人與幸福感、福祉以及生活滿意度的增加有關。

It doesn't need to be grand gestures, sometimes it can be the little things that really make a difference.

它不需要是宏大的姿態，有時小事也能帶來真正的改變。

Acknowledging somebody, giving them eye contact, smiling, opening a door, perhaps picking up some litter or making an environment more comfortable for somebody, or a compliment, can really help to make a person's day glow.

認可某人、眼神接觸、微笑、打開一扇門，也許撿起一些垃圾，或使一個環境對某人來說更舒適，或一句讚美，真的可以使人的一天煥發光彩。

There are many reasons why kindness might have this positive effect.

有很多原因可以解釋為什麼善良會產生這種積極的影響。

It can boost our mood, and acts of kindness can help us feel more capable.

它可以提升我們的心情，善意的行為可以幫助我們感到更有能力。

There is also some evidence that it can help us buffer the negative effects of stress.

也有一些證據它可以幫助我們緩衝壓力的負面影響。

Kindness is thought to be one of the key ways that people create, maintain, and strengthen their social connections.

善良被認為是人們創造、保持和加強社會聯繫的關鍵方式之一。

We're living in a world where we're more connected than we've ever been.

我們生活在一個比以往任何時刻都更加緊密相連的世界中。

But really positive connections aren't just about people who like you on the Internet, it's about people who are going to be with you for the good times and for the bad times.

但真正積極的聯繫並不僅僅是和在網路上喜歡你的人有關，而是和那些在你開心或低潮時，都在你旁邊支持你的人有關。

Making great connections in your life is a little bit like building sturdy bridges, because they can help to transport you safely through challenging times in your life.

在生活中建立緊密的聯繫是有點像建造堅實的橋樑，因為他們可以幫你安全度過你生活中的重重挑戰。