I keep acting like this is a new phenomenon.

我一直表現得好像這是個新現象。

I can't believe it's been almost a year.

我不敢相信已經快一年了。

I'm so used to talking to you in person.

我已經習慣了和你當面交談。

We always have a good time.

我們總是有一個很好的時間。

I don't even know where you are right now.

我甚至不知道你現在在哪裡。

Where are you?

你在哪裡？

I'm in the guest room of someone else,

我在別人的客房裡。

I was going to say someone else's house, which it is,

我想說的是別人家的房子，這是事實。

'cause it's an Airbnb.

因為它是一個Airbnb。

I'm in Montreal, as I, yeah I'm in Montreal.

我在蒙特利爾，因為我，是的，我在蒙特利爾。

Okay, it's so funny

好吧，太好笑了

'cause it looks like you're on the run from the law.

因為它看起來像你在逃避法律。

It's just, this all has the, I tracked down Jay Baruchel

這只是，這一切都有， 我跟蹤了傑伊-巴魯切爾。

who you all know is on the run.

你們都知道他在逃亡

I've tracked him down.

我已經找到他了

(laughing)

（笑）

It's 5:00 AM in the shelling has just started.

現在是凌晨5點，炮擊剛剛開始。

(laughing)

（笑）

Are you doing okay?

你還好嗎？

So you're staying in this Airbnb in Montreal.

所以，你住在這個Airbnb在蒙特利爾。

How are you adapting to all of this, is this,

你是如何適應這一切的，是這。

'cause I've noticed two things.

因為我注意到兩件事

There are people that just can't handle this quarantine,

有些人就是受不了這種檢疫。

this lockdown, this pandemic

這次封鎖，這次大流行

and there are other people

還有其他人

that are sort of oddly suited to it.

是一種奇特的適合它的。

Where are you?

你在哪裡？

What's most depressing, I think,

我想，最讓人鬱悶的是。

is that last year was the by far,

是，去年是由。

by far the most relaxed I've been in my adult life.

到目前為止，最放鬆的我已經在我的成年生活。

You know, it's funny, it is,

你知道，這很有趣，它是。

we're not supposed to admit that,

我們不應該承認這一點。

but there are some of us that are getting really good sleep.

但也有一些人得到了很好的睡眠。

Exactly.

就是這樣

I don't know about you, but I've spent,

我不知道你怎麼樣，但我已經花了。

I get great sleep

我睡得很香

and I've been just basically wearing leisurewear for

而我一直只是基本上穿著休閒裝，為

and it's gotten to the point now

鬧到現在這個地步

where I think I'm putting it in my will

我想我把它放在我的遺囑中

that when my time comes, I wanna be buried,

當我的時間到了，我想被埋葬。

I want in the casket, I want to be in like Lulu lemon.

我想在棺材裡，我想在像露露檸檬。

I hear that.

我聽到了

I just, yeah, it's a sad state of affairs.

我只是，是的，這是一個悲傷的事態。

No, it certainly is.

不，它當然是。

I'm in a post jean's world.

我在後牛仔褲的世界裡。

I can't conceive of ever wearing them

我無法想象自己會穿上它們。

if somebody wasn't paying me.

如果有人不付錢給我，

I'm doing this TV show now

我現在正在做這個電視節目

and now I have to squeeze into the damn things

現在我不得不擠進這該死的東西。

and I just like, yeah I didn't miss that at all.

我只是喜歡，是的，我沒有錯過，在所有。

Yeah, no, if I was to pan down,

是的，不，如果我是平移下來。

you would see it's squarely a party on the bottom.

你會看到這是正大光明的黨在底部。

That's no, never, never saying that sentence again.

這不，以後再也不說這句話了。

Exactly.

就是這樣

Don't ever and you shouldn't have said it the first time.

千萬不要和你不該說的第一次。

I'd edit it out, but who has the money for that?

我想把它編輯出來，但誰有錢做這個？

I think last time you were on the show in person

我想上次你親自上節目的時候...

you were with your fiance at the time

你當時和你的未婚夫在一起

and I know that you were planning

我知道你在計劃

to get married really soon

快要結婚了

and I think you got married

我想你已經結婚了

just as this thing locked everybody down, didn't you?

就像這東西把所有人都鎖住了一樣，不是嗎？

Yeah, we really got married.

是的，我們真的結婚了。

We got married and that was that.

我們結婚了，就是這樣。

I'll be honest, when all this started,

我說實話，當這一切開始的時候。

I really thought we'd kill each other

我真的以為我們會自相殘殺

and strangely that's not what happened

但奇怪的是，事情並非如此

and it ended up being kind of nice.

最後還是挺好的。

However, there was a point last summer

然而，去年夏天有一個點

when my wife answered a question kind of short or something.

當我老婆回答問題的時候，有點短促什麼的。

I was like, why are you so crabby?

我當時就想，你怎麼這麼暴躁？

And she was like, well listen, nothing personal,

她就說，好吧，聽著，不是針對你。

but it's been, it's been only you all year

但它一直，它一直只有你一年。

and was like, I am deeply sympathetic.

並且很喜歡，我深深的同情。

It's been 38 years for me.

對我來說，已經38年了。

So I get you to completely.

所以我讓你完全。

(laughing)

（笑）