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  • BUT FIRST, WE HAVE TO TALK ABOUT THAT FINAL PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE.

    但首先,我們得談談最後的總統辯論。

  • DID YOU GUYS WATCH LAST NIGHT?

    你們昨晚看了嗎?

  • REGGIE, DID YOU SEE IT?

    雷吉,你看到了嗎?

  • >> Reggie: I DID.

    >> 雷吉:有。

  • >> James: YEAH?

    >> 詹姆斯。YEAH?

  • WHAT DID YOU THINK?

    你覺得呢?

  • >> Reggie: IT WAS ALARMINGLY MELLOW.

    >> 雷吉:EN是驚心動魄的。

  • >> James: IT WAS.

    >> 詹姆斯。是的。

  • YOU KNOW WHAT I THOUGHT IT WAS LIKE?

    你知道我覺得它像什麼嗎?

  • IT REMEANED ME OF A TIME THAT WE WERE GOING, I THINK ABOUT 13,

    這讓我想起了我們去的時候,我想是13歲吧。

  • AND WE WERE GOING TO MY AUNTIE MARILYN'S AND I HAD BEEN QUITE

    我們要去我的姑媽瑪麗蓮家,我已經很。

  • BADLY BEHAVED THE LAST TIME WE WERE THERE, RIGHT, AND I CAN

    上次我們在那裡的時候表現得很糟糕,對吧,我可以

  • REMEMBER SO VIVIDLY, AND I ONLY REMEMBER IT WATCHING THE DEBATE

    我記得很清楚,我只記得在看辯論的時候。

  • MY MOM GOING, NOW, NO MORE OF WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME.

    我媽媽要走了,現在,沒有更多的什麼發生了最後一次。

  • DO YOU UNDERSTAND?

    你明白了嗎?

  • YOU'RE ON YOUR BEST BEHAVIOR.

    你是在你最好的行為。

  • ANY MESSING AROUND, ANY CHATBACK, ARGUING, FIGHTING,

    任何亂七八糟的事情,任何哈拉,爭吵,打架。

  • THAT'S IT, WE'LL JUST GO.

    就是這樣,我們就走吧。

  • DO YOU UNDERSTAND?

    你明白了嗎?

  • I SAID, YES.

    我說,是的。

  • AND THE WHOLE TIME I WAS THERE, I WAS, THANK YOU, AUNTIE,

    而我在那裡的時候,我是,謝謝你,阿姨。

  • MARILYN.

    瑪麗蓮:

  • AUNTIE MARILYN, IS THERE ANY CHANCE I COULD HAVE A CUP OF

    瑪麗蓮阿姨,我能不能喝杯咖啡?

  • TEA?

    TEA?

  • THANK YOU, AUNTIE MARILYN, I REALTY APPRECIATE IT.

    謝謝你,瑪麗蓮阿姨,我真的很感激。

  • THAT'S WHAT THE TWO OF THEM LOOKED LIKE ON THE STAGE.

    這就是他們兩個在舞臺上的樣子。

  • THEY'D BOTH BEEN TOLD OFF.

    他們都被告知了。

  • >> Reggie: YEAH.

    >> 雷吉:YEAH。

  • >> James: I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHO THAT DEBATE WAS FOR.

    >> 詹姆斯。我真的不知道那場辯論是為了誰。

  • MORE THAN 47 MILLION AMERICAN VOTERS HAVE ALREADY VOTED.

    超過4700萬美國選民已經進行了投票。

  • WHO HASN'TMADE THEIR MIND UP?

    誰還沒有下定決心?

  • I THINK PEOPLE ACTUALLY VOTED EARLY JUST SO THEY DIDN'T HAVE

    我想人們實際上提前投票只是為了不需要

  • TO WATCH THAT FINAL DEBATE.

    看那最後的辯論。

  • WATCHING THE AT THE BAIT?

    在看《魚餌》?

  • NO, I'VE SENT MINE IN.

    不,我已經送進去了。

  • I'LL BE WATCHING THE GIANTS-EAGLES GAME.

    我會看巨人隊和老鷹隊的比賽。

  • HAVE A GOOD ONE.

    有一個好的。

  • IT WAS FOR THE ONE REMAINING UNDECIDED VOTER.

    是為了剩下的一個未決定的投票者。

  • I CAN TELL YOU HIS NAME IS CRAIG, HE LIVES IN DENVER, AND

    我可以告訴你,他的名字叫克萊格,他住在丹佛,而且。

  • FUNNY FACT ABOUT CRAIG, HE IS AN (BLEEP).

    克雷格的趣事,他是一個(嗶)。

  • ( LAUGHTER ) LET'S TALK ABOUT THE DEBATE.

    讓我們來談談這場辯論。

  • IT STARTED OUT PRETTY CIVIL WITH BOTH TRUMP AND BIDEN STAYING ON

    一開始很文雅,特朗普和比登都留在了這裡

  • TOPIC.

    主題:

  • THE FIRST SUBJECT WAS THE CORONAVIRUS EPIDEMIC WHICH LED

    第一個主題是導致冠狀病毒疫情的原因。

  • TO THIS EXCHANGE -- >> WE'RE ABOUT TO GO INTO DARK

    交易所 -- >> 我們要進入黑暗狀態了

  • WINTER, A DARK WINTER, AND EHE HAS NO CLEAR PLAN AND THERE'S NO

    冬天,一個黑暗的冬天,和他沒有明確的計劃,也沒有。

  • PROSPECT THAT THERE'S GOING TO BE A VACCINE AVAILABLE FOR THE

    有可能會有一種疫苗可用於治療癌症。

  • MAJORITY OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE BEFORE THE MIDDLE OF NEXT YEAR.

    明年年中之前,大多數美國人民。

  • >> PRESIDENT TRUMP, YOUR REACTION, HE SAYS YOU HAVE NO

    >> 特朗普總統,你的反應,他說你沒有。

  • PLAN.

    計劃:

  • >> I DON'T THINK WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A DARK WINTER AT ALL.

    >> 我不認為我們會有一個黑暗的冬天。

  • >> James: THESE GUYS ARE SO EMO.

    >> 詹姆斯。這些傢伙是如此EMO。

  • DARK WINTER SOUNDS LIKE AN "AVENGERS" MOVIE OR A SEQUEL TO

    黑暗的冬天聽起來像 "AVENGERS "的電影或續集

  • "THE HUNGER GAMES" THAT WILL NEVER BE IN THEATERS BECAUSE TO

    "飢餓遊戲",永遠不會在電影院,因為到

  • HAVE THE DARK WINTER.

    有黑暗的冬天。

  • ( LAUGHTER ) IT'S ACTUALLY GOING TO BE A

    (笑)它實際上將是一個。

  • FAIRLY WELL LIT WINTER BECAUSE WE'RE ALL GOING TO BE STUCK

    公平地照亮冬天,因為我們都會被困住。

  • INSIDE.

    內幕:

  • FOR ANY YOUNGER VIEWERS, WHEN I SAY WELL LIT, I DON'T MEAN THE

    對於任何年輕的觀眾,當我說WELL LIT,我並不是指的是那個。

  • WAY YOU MEAN LIT.

    你的意思是LIT。

  • ( LAUGHTER ) YOU KNOW, TIM KNOWS.

    (笑)你知道,TIM知道。

  • ( LAUGHTER ) TIM'S THE POINT REFERENCE

    (笑) TIM'S THE POINT REFERENCE (笑)

  • WHENEVER I WANT TO GO, TIM, ONE OF THE YOUNG HIP AND GROOVY

    無論我想去哪裡,TIM,一個年輕的HIP和GROOVY。

  • GANG GOING FOR.

    岡去為:

  • AND HE'LL COME BACK GOING, OH, HE'S, LIKE, FLOSSING IN THE

    他會回來的,哦,他是,喜歡, FLOSSING中的

  • CORNER AND -- ( LAUGHTER )

    CORNER和 - (笑)

  • AT ONE POINT, PRESIDENT TRUMP WENT ON THE ATTACK AND ACCUSED

    有一次,特朗普總統發起攻擊,並指責

  • BIDEN OF HIDING FROM COVID IN HIS BASEMENT.

    比登在他的地下室裡躲避科維德。

  • >> WE'RE LEARNING TO LIVE WIT.

    >> 我們正在學習如何生活。

  • WE CAN'T LOCK OURSELVES UP IN THE BASEMENT LIKE JOE DOES.

    我們不能像喬那樣把自己鎖在地下室裡。

  • HE'S OBVIOUSLY MADE A LOT OF MONEY SOMEPLACE, BUT HE HAS THIS

    他顯然是賺了很多錢的地方,但他有這個。

  • THING ABOUT LIVING IN A BASEMENT.

    關於住在地下室的事情。

  • PEOPLE CAN'T DO THAT.

    人們不能這樣做。

  • BY THE WAY, I, AS THE PRESIDENT, COULD DON'T THAT.

    順便說一下,我作為主席,可以不這樣做。

  • I'D LOVE TO PUT MYSELF IN THE BASEMENT OR IN A BEAUTIFUL ROOM

    我想把自己放在地下室或美麗的房間裡。

  • IN THE WHITE HOUSE AND GO AWAY FOR A YEAR AND A HALF UNTILT IT

    在白宮裡,離開一年半,直到它。

  • DISAPPEARS.

    消失。

  • >> James: YEAH, WE WOULD LOVE IT, TOO!

    >> 詹姆斯。是的,我們也會喜歡它!

  • IMAGINE TRUMP DISAPPEARING LIKE THAT.

    想象一下特朗普就這樣消失了。

  • AFTER HE SAID THAT, EVEN MELANIA LOOKED UP FROM HER MAGAZINE.

    他說完後,連梅蘭妮亞都從雜誌上抬起頭來。

  • ( LAUGHTER ) TRUMP SAID HE'D LOVE TO HIDE IN

    特朗普說,他很想躲在

  • THE BASEMENT FOR A YEAR.

    一年的地下室。

  • BUT I GUESS HE'LL HAVE TO MAKE DUE WITH HIDING ON A GOLF COURSE

    但我想他必須要躲在高爾夫球場上才行。

  • FOR BASICALLY THREE YEARS.

    基本上三年。

  • ( LAUGHTER ) NOW, THE NIGHT STARTED OFF A

    現在,晚上開始了一個

  • LITTLE SLOW, BUT THEN JOE BIDEN REALIZED EXACTLY WHO HE IS.

    有點慢,但後來喬-比登意識到了他的真實身份。

  • >> HE'S A VERY CONFUSED GUY.

    >> 他是一個非常困惑的傢伙。

  • HE THINKS HE'S RUNNING AGAINST SOMEBODY ELSE.

    他以為自己是在和別人競爭。

  • HE'S RUNNING AGAINST JOE BIDEN.

    他正在競選喬-比登的對手。

  • I BEAT ALL THOSE OTHER PEOPLE BECAUSE I DISAGREED WITH THEM.

    我打了所有其他的人,因為我和他們意見不一致。

  • JOE BIDEN HE'S RUNNING AGAINST.

    喬-比登,他正在競選反對。

  • >> James: JOE BIDEN.

    >> 詹姆斯:JOE BIDEN.

  • BIG BABY B.

    BIG BABY B.

  • THE BIG MAN.

    大人物:

  • THE SULTAN OF SLEEP.

    睡眠的蘇丹。

  • COME ON, MY GUY!

    來吧,我的傢伙!

  • EITHER JOE BIDEN FOUND HIS FIGHTING SPIRIT OR HE FORGET

    無論是喬-比登找到了他的戰鬥精神,還是他忘記了。

  • THAT HE'S JOE BIDEN, BUT EITHER WAY, I'M PUMPED!

    他是喬-比登,但無論哪種方式,我很興奮!

  • AT ONE POINT, THOUGH, TRUMP WENT AFTER BIDEN'S SON, HUNTER, AND

    有一次,特朗普去找比登的兒子,獵手,和。

  • IMPLIED THAT BIDEN HIMSELF WAS INVOLVED IN SOMETHING UNETHICAL.

    暗示比登本人参與了一些不合法的事情。

  • >> TO EVEN HAVE A STATEMENT THAT WE HAVE TO GIVE 10% TO THE BIG

    >>甚至有一個聲明,我們必須給大公司10%的資金。

  • MAN.

    男人:

  • YOU'RE THE BIG MAN, I THINK.

    你是大人物,我想。

  • I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE YOU'RE NOT.

    我不知道,也許你不是。

  • BUT YOU'RE THE BIG MAN, I THINK.

    但我覺得你是個大人物。

  • >> James: THIS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE.

    >> 詹姆斯。這沒有意義。

  • ANYTIME ANYONE -- THE ONLY TIME ANYONE USES THE PHRASE BIG MAN

    任何時候任何人 -- -- 唯一有人使用PHRASE BIG MAN的時候。

  • IS IF THEY FORGET SOMEONE'S NAME.

    是如果他們忘記了某人的名字。

  • YEAH, HOW YOU DOING, BIG MAN, BIG FELLA, TIM, REGGIE, BIG

    是啊,你怎麼樣,大個子,大個子,大個子,TIM,雷吉,大個子。

  • ( BLEEP ) PLAYER.

    (嗶嗶聲)玩家:

  • ( LAUGHTER ) I DON'T THINK JOE BIDEN IS THE

    我不認為喬-比登是那個...

  • BIG MAN.

    BIG MAN.

  • NO ONE LOOKS AT JOE BIDEN AND CALLS HIM THE BIG MAN.

    沒有人看喬-比登並稱他為大人物。

  • IF I WAS GOING TO CALL HIM THAT, I WOULD CALL HIM, LIKE, SLICK,

    如果我要這麼叫他,我會叫他,就像,滑頭。

  • NIGHT TIGER, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

    夜老虎,你知道我的意思嗎?

  • ( LAUGHTER ) >> Reggie: THAT'S GOOD.

    (笑) >> 雷吉:很好。

  • >> James: TRUMP TRIED TO PORTRAY HIMSELF AS BEING TOUGH

    >> 詹姆斯特朗普試圖把自己塑造成一個強硬的人。

  • ON RUSSIA SAYING THE UKRAINE ASKED FOR WEAPONS TO DEFEND

    關於俄羅斯稱烏克蘭要求提供武器來保衛國家的問題:

  • ITSELF FROM RUSSIA BUT OBAMA AND BIDEN GAVE THEM SOMETHING ELSE

    但奧巴馬和比登給了他們一些其他的東西。

  • INSTEAD.

    而不是。

  • >> I SOLD WHILE HE WAS SELLING PILLOWS AND SHEETS, I TOLD TANK

    >> 我賣的時候,他是賣枕頭和床單,我告訴TANK。

  • BUSTERS TO UKRAINE.

    BUSTERS TO UKRAINE.

  • THERE HAS BEEN NOBODY TOUGHER ON RUSSIA THAN DONALD TRUMP.

    沒有人比唐納德-特朗普對俄羅斯更強硬。

  • >> James: AND IF YOU'RE INTERESTED ON PILLOWS AND SHEETS

    >> 詹姆斯。如果你對枕頭和床單有興趣的話

  • IT'S AVAILABLE AT HIS NEW OUTLET STORE BED, BIDEN AND BEYOND.

    它可以在他的新OUTLET商店BED,BIDEN和BEYOND。

  • ( LAUGHTER ) ONE OF THE BIG JAW DROPPING

    其中一個大下巴掉下來的時候

  • MOMENTS TO HAVE THE NIGHT IS WHEN TRUMP SAID THIS.

    有夜的時刻是特朗普說這話的時候。

  • >> NOBODY HAS DONE MORE FOR THE BLACK COMMUNITY THAN DONALD

    >> 沒有人比唐納德為黑人社區做得更多。

  • TRUMP, AND IF YOU LOOK, WITH THE EXCEPTION OF ABRAHAM LINCOLN,

    特朗普,如果你看,除了亞伯拉罕-林肯之外。

  • POSSIBLE EXCEPTION, BUT THE EXCEPTION OF ABRAHAM LINCOLN --

    可能的例外,但亞伯拉罕-林肯的例外 -- --

  • >> James: WOW.

    >> 詹姆斯。WOW。

  • THE HUMILITY.

    幽默感:

  • IT'S A TOSSUP, ABRAHAM LINCOLN ENDED SLAVERY, DONALD TRUMP --

    這是一個兩敗俱傷的局面, 亞伯拉罕-林肯結束了奴隸制, 唐納德-特朗普... ...

  • MET KANYE THAT ONE TIME.

    遇到KANYE那一次。

  • ( LAUGHTER ) YOU KNOW, TRUMP SAYS NOBODY HAS

    你知道,特朗普說,沒有人有。

  • DONE MORE FOR THE BLACK COMMUNITY, AND YOU CAN SEE THIS

    為黑人社區做了更多的事情,你可以看到這一點。

  • BY HOW MUCH THE BLACK COMMUNITY COMES OUT TO SUPPORT TRUMP AT

    看黑人社區在會議上有多少人出來支持特朗普。

  • HIS RALLIES.

    他的集會。

  • ( LAUGHTER ) BUT TRUMP DIDN'T START THIS.

    但特朗普並沒有開始這個。

  • A LITTLE WHILE LATER HE HAD THIS TO SAY.

    稍後,他有這樣的說法。

  • >> I AM THE LEAST RACIST PERSON.

    >> 我是最沒有種族歧視的人。

  • I CAN'T EVEN SEE THE AUDIENCE BECAUSE IT'S SO DARK, BUT I

    我甚至看不到觀眾,因為它是如此的黑暗,但我。

  • DON'T CARE WHO'S IN THE AUDIENCE, I'M THE LEAST RACIST

    我不在乎誰在觀眾席上,我是最沒有種族歧視的人。

  • PERSON IN THAT ROOM.

    在那個房間的人。

  • >> James: THAT ROOM MUFFIN PRETTY DARK BECAUSE HE COULD

    >> 詹姆斯:那個房間裡的穆芬非常黑暗,因為他可以。

  • UPPT SEE THE AFRICAN-AMERICAN MODERATOR TEN FEET IN FRONT OF

    上方看到非洲-美洲改良者在前面十英尺的地方。

  • HIM.

    他:

  • THE LEAST RACIST PERSON IN THE ROOM.

    房間裡最沒有種族歧視的人:

  • THAT WOULD ONLY BE TRUE IF HE WAS IN A SINGLE-STALL BATHROOM.

    如果他是在單人浴室裡,那才是真的。

  • DONALD TRUMP, JR. WAS AT THE DEBATE MEANING DO DONALD TRUMP

    唐納德-特朗普,JR.是在辯論的意思做唐納德-特朗普。

  • ISN'T EVEN THE LEAST RACIST PERSON IN THAT ROOM.

    甚至不是在那間屋子裡最沒有種族歧視的人。

  • THAT'S WHAT PEOPLE WHO ARE RACIST DO, THEY COMPARE HOW NOT

    這就是那些有種族歧視的人所做的,他們比較如何不。

  • RACIST THEY ARE.

    他們是種族主義者。

  • THEN THEY GOT INTO THE ISSUE OF CLIMATE CHANGE, AND TRUMP

    然後,他們進入了氣候變化的問題,和特朗普。

  • PAINTED A PICTURE OF...

    畫了一幅畫... ...

  • SOME BIZARRE ARCHITECTURE.

    一些奇異的建築。

  • TAKE A LOOK.

    看看吧

  • >> WHEN HE SAYS BUILDINGS, I WANT TO TAKE THE BUILDINGS DOWN

    >> 當他說建築物時,我想把建築物拆掉■。

  • BECAUSE I WANT TO MAKE BIGGER WINDOWS INTO SMALLER WINDOWS.

    因為我想把更大的WINDOWS變成更小的WINDOWS。

  • IF YOU HAD NO WINDOW, IT WOULD BE A FUNNY THING.

    如果你沒有窗戶,那會是一件很有趣的事情。

  • >> JAMES: I GOT TO HAND IT TO TRUMP.

    >> 我得把它交給川普。

  • THAT'S A FUNNY IMAGE.

    這是一個有趣的影像。

  • BIG BUILDING, LITTLE WINDOWS-- THAT'S JUST CLASSIC COMEDY.

    大建築,小窗戶,這只是經典的喜劇。

  • BUT THERE'S A VERY SIMPLE REASON WHY TRUMP IS AFRAID OF TINY

    但有一個非常簡單的理由,為什麼特朗普害怕小... ...

  • WINDOWS.

    WINDOWS。

  • THE MOST COMMON PLACE YOU FIND THEM IS IN A PRISON.

    最常見的地方,你發現他們是在監獄裡。