Hi, James from www.engvid.com . I don't know why they just walked away.

嗨，詹姆斯從www.engvid.com 。我不知道為什麼他們就這麼走了。

That was so rude!

太無禮了！

Let's go to the board and talk to E. Stop boring people?

我們去董事會和E聊聊吧，別再讓人覺得無聊了?

Four signs it's time to end a conversation.

四個跡象表明，是時候結束對話了。

Wow.

哇哦

You know what?

你知道嗎？

When I think about it, he's got a point.

我想想，他說的也有道理。

This video is to help you to be aware of when you should let a conversation go.

這段視頻是為了幫助你意識到什麼時候你應該讓一個談話去。

Why is this important?

為什麼這很重要？

I've done many videos on how to continue a conversation, make conversations interesting,

我做過很多視頻，如何繼續對話，讓對話變得有趣。

how to start one, because we know that you need practice to get good at learning languages,

如何開始一個，因為我們知道，你需要練習才能學好語文。

or acquiring languages.

或習得語言。

Whether it be English, Spanish, Arabic, Russian.

無論是英語、西班牙語、阿拉伯語、俄語。

So, you need a lot of practice.

所以，你需要大量的練習。

But in order to get that practice, you want people to willingly talk to you.

但為了得到這種練習，你要讓人們心甘情願地和你說話。

And if you continue a conversation past the point that they want to talk to you, they

如果你繼續對話過去的點，他們想和你談談，他們。

will eventually start avoiding you when they see you, because you don't know when to end

最終會在看到你的時候開始躲避你，因為你不知道什麼時候結束。

it and they feel trapped.

它，他們感到被困。

You don't want to be the one person that people are like, "Oh god, here comes E and James.

你不想成為一個人，人們都喜歡，"哦，上帝，來了E和詹姆斯。

We gotta get out of here."

我們得離開這裡。"

Right?

對吧？

So, this specific lesson is how to spot when somebody wants to end a conversation with

所以，這節課的具體內容就是如何發現有人想用以下方式結束對話的時候

you.

你。

And why it's important?

為什麼它很重要？

Because if you can end that conversation before they get there, they will want to talk to

因為如果你能在他們到達之前結束談話，他們就會想和你談談。

you later.

你以後。

Now, how will we do this?

現在，我們要怎麼做呢？

Well, I'm going to introduce to you body language you should look for.

好了，小編給大家介紹一下你應該注意的肢體語言。

I will show you some phrases or words - key words they may use.

我將向你展示一些短語或單詞--他們可能使用的關鍵詞。

Some things about tone, okay?

關於語氣的一些事情，好嗎？

And conversation pacing.

和談話的節奏。

Once you have these things in your head, you'll be able to find that you'll know just before

一旦你把這些東西記在腦子裡，你就能發現，你會知道就在之前

a conversation's about to go - we call it sideways, or go in a bad direction.

談話要走了--我們稱它為 "橫著走"，或者說往壞的方向走。

You'll be able to end that conversation and have that person feeling comfortable enough

你就可以結束這場談話，讓他感覺到足夠的舒適。

to speak to you again.

再跟你說話。

Are you ready?

你準備好了嗎？

Let's go to the board.

我們去董事會吧。

So, I've got numbers for you, 1, 2, 3, 4, because the lesson is about the four signs

所以，我給你們準備了數字，1、2、3、4，因為這節課講的是四種符號的問題

it's time to end a conversation.

是時候結束對話了

I did tell you how we're going to do this, and one of the ways we're going to look at

我告訴過你我們要怎麼做，其中一個方法是，我們要看一看

is body language.

就是肢體語言。

Because when you see people using these signs, they're telling you it's time to end the conversation.

因為當你看到人們使用這些標誌時，他們在告訴你是時候結束對話了。

The first one is shoulder and foot position.

第一個是肩和腳的位置。

Now, you can't see my feet.

現在，你看不到我的腳了。

Maybe that's a good thing.

也許這是件好事。

I haven't cut them yet, no mani-pedis.

我還沒有剪，沒有馬尼-佩德斯。

But you'll notice the person's foot will go towards an exit.

但你會發現，這個人的腳會往出口走。

So, if you're talking to somebody and you just casually look down and one foot is pointing

所以，如果你在和別人說話的時候，你只是隨意地低頭看了一眼，一隻腳指著的是...

towards you and the other foot is pointing towards a door, probably they want to leave.

對著你，另一隻腳指著一扇門，可能他們想離開。

Now, that's not a bad thing.

現在，這不是一件壞事。

It might be just at that moment, they're thinking to themselves, "Oh, I've got go home and cook

可能就在那一刻，他們在想，"哦，我得回家做飯了

dinner", or "I've got to do...", and you notice what's happening with my body?

晚餐"，或者 "我得做......"，你注意到我的身體發生了什麼嗎？

It's shifting over.

它的轉移過來。

It doesn't mean I really need to get out, but my brain is starting to go there.

這並不意味著我真的需要出去，但我的大腦開始去那裡。

My body's moving there.

我的身體在那裡移動。

You'll see also that shoulders will move.

你也會看到，肩膀會動。

Their shoulder might start going, "Oh, that's really nice.

他們的肩膀可能會開始說："哦，那真是太好了。

You and the kids are going on vacation next week.

你和孩子們下週要去度假。

Cool, I'd like to hear more about..." going towards an exit.

酷，我想多聽聽...... "走向一個出口。

So, look at the rotation of their body or the position of their body.

所以，要看他們身體的旋轉或身體的位置。

If someone's really exited to talk to you, you'll notice that the foot might shift back

如果有人真的很想跟你說話，你會發現腳可能會往後移

towards you, indicating they want to continue the conversation.

朝著你，表示他們想繼續對話。

So, the first sign you should look for, which is the beginning of they want to end the conversation

所以，你應該尋找的第一個跡象，這是他們想要結束對話的開始。

is look at their foot.

是看他們的腳。

Is it pointing towards an exit?

是指著出口嗎？

Look at their shoulder, does it start to move towards the exit?

看看他們的肩膀，是否開始向出口移動？

Because it means the body's getting ready to run.

因為這意味著身體已經做好了奔跑的準備。

Well, not really run, but you know what I'm saying.

嗯，不是真的跑，但你知道我在說什麼。

First one.

第一個。

The second one, eyes.

第二個，眼睛。

After I've moved my body this way, you might start noticing that my eyes aren't on you

當我把身體移到這邊來之後 你可能會發現我的眼睛並不在你身上。

anymore.

不再。

They're down, if I'm holding at drink, at my drink.

他們下來了，如果我拿著飲料，在我的飲料。

They might be looking at other people, looking at the clock around you.

他們可能在看別人，看你身邊的時鐘。

This is when it's becoming - from unconscious - that is my body turning towards an exit

這時，它就變成了--從無意識的--那是我的身體轉向了一個出口

- to conscious, that I feel I've got to get going and I don't want to be rude.

- 到意識到，我覺得我得走了，我不想無禮。

So, these signs are - you're moving closer to somebody wants to end the conversation.

所以，這些跡象是--你正在接近有人想結束對話。

And now it's conscious.

而現在它的意識。

They're aware that maybe the conversation isn't exciting anymore, or stimulating.

他們意識到，也許談話已經不刺激了，或者說刺激了。

Making them interested, or that they have to leave and time is happening.

讓他們感興趣，或者說他們必須離開，時間正在發生。

Or, they're bored.

或者，他們很無聊。

You've been talking and they're like "Oh wow.

你一直在說，他們就像 "哦，哇"。

Hm hm hm hm hm hm."

哼哼哼哼"。

They're just trying to think of anything else.

他們只是在想別的事情。

And looking at objects is to try to keep our attention.

而看物體是為了儘量保持我們的注意力。

Because when people want to talk to you, they will keep close attention or keep their eyes

因為當人們想和你說話的時候，他們會保持密切的關注，或者說保持他們的目光

on you.

在你身上。

Alright?

好嗎？

So, second sign, watch their eyes.

所以，第二個信號，注意他們的眼睛。

There's a difference between moving their eyes and thinking about things and then looking

動動眼珠子，想一想，再看一看，有什麼不同？

over for a second or two over here and over there.

過來一兩秒鐘，這裡和那裡。

It's almost a very obvious sign, but sometimes we miss it because we're so excited about

這幾乎是一個非常明顯的跡象，但有時我們錯過了它，因為我們太興奮了。

getting to practice that we're not really paying attention to the other person.

得到練習，我們並沒有真正注意到對方。

Now, let's look at number three.

現在，讓我們看看第三條。

Number three - I've got musical notes here, but what I'm really talking about is tone.

第三條--我這裡有樂譜，但我真正要講的是音調。

When I'm really happy to see you, I'm going to go, "So, what have you been up to?"

當我看到你真的很高興的時候，我就會說："那麼，你最近在幹什麼？"

My voice goes up, and you go, "Well, I'm going to be going to the store and then I'm going

我的聲音上去了，你就說："好吧，我要去商店，然後我要去

to be doing..." as my tone goes up, it's about excitement in English.

to be doing...... "隨著我的語調升高，是關於英語的興奮。

It's excitement, I'm happy, alright?

是興奮，我很高興，好嗎？

So, if I go, "Well, what have you been doing?"

所以，如果我說："那你最近在做什麼？"

Well, what have you been doing?

那麼，你一直在做什麼？

So, is this your new boyfriend?

那麼，這是你的新男友嗎？

This is good.

這是很好的。

But when our tone goes down, as the arrow indicates, and you see these words, okay?

但是當我們的語氣往下走的時候，就像箭頭訓示的那樣，你看到這些字，好嗎？

You'll notice that the tone will go down.

你會發現，音調會下降。

I'll be talking to you and I'll go, "Well..."

我會跟你說話，我會說："嗯... ..."

I'm not "Well!", it's "Well..."

我不是 "嗯！"，是 "嗯..."

My voice dips down because I'm kind of coming to the end of the conversation, okay?

我的聲音低沉下來，因為我的談話快要結束了，好嗎？

Or, I'll go, "Anyway..." and there'll be a pause.

或者，我會說："總之...... "然後會有一個停頓。

Or, "So..."

或者，"那麼..."

Now, at this point, I've gone from changing my body position to say I want to leave.

現在，此時的我已經從改變身體姿勢到說要離開了。

Looking around to show I'm not as interested, to actually giving you an audio cue, that

環顧四周，以示我沒有那麼大的興趣，其實給你一個音頻提示，那就。

means a listening cue, that I'm out of conversation and I'm basically almost done.

意味著聽話的提示，我的談話已經結束了，我基本上快結束了。

I'm giving you the opportunity, actually, in this case, to say "Hey, I gotta go, I'll

我給你機會，實際上，在這種情況下，說："嘿，我得走了，我會的。

see you later."

回頭見。"

Or, "It was nice talking", but I'm giving you the opportunity so I'm not rude.

或者說 "聊得很好"，但我給你機會，所以我不失禮。

Really, we want to catch it here, because then you'll the cool person who ends the conversation

真的，我們想在這裡抓住它，因為這樣你就會成為一個很酷的人誰結束對話

first.

先是。

By the time you got here, they're saying hey, last chance.

等你到了這裡，他們會說，嘿，最後的機會。

Do you remember I talked about pacing?

你還記得我說過節奏的問題嗎？

Some of you were like, "What does he mean, pacing?"

你們中的一些人說："他是什麼意思，踱步？"

Well, pacing means the speed of something.

嗯，節奏是指某件事的速度。

If I pace this, I've got a quick pace.

如果我這樣踱步，我的步伐就會很快。

I'm being very fast.

我的速度非常快。

But I could also have a slow pace and walk slowly.

但我也可以有一個緩慢的步伐，慢慢走。

That's the speed of my walk.

這就是我走路的速度。

The same with talking.

說話也一樣。

When we use these words, the pace of the conversation will change to being upbeat and relatively

當我們使用這些話語時，談話的節奏就會轉變為歡快，相對而言，我們的談話就會變得更輕鬆。

fast to slower with pauses.

快到慢，有停頓。

So, the more the pause, the longer the pause, the pace is slowing down.

所以，越是停頓，停頓的時間越長，速度就越慢。

The worst case you want to be in is this one.

最壞的情況下，你想要的是這個。

One, two, three, four.

一、二、三、四

That's when someone says this, "Well..." they say nothing.

那就是當有人這樣說的時候，"嗯...... "他們什麼都不說。

Basically, the conversation is now dead.

基本上，現在已經談崩了。

Morte.

死亡。

You've gone on too long and they've basically ended it.

你說的太久了，他們基本上已經結束了。

So, they're forcing you to keep talking, but they're too nice to actually just walk away

所以，他們強迫你繼續說話，但他們太好心了，實際上只是走開了。

from you.

從你那裡。

But, once it gets that four second pause, we call it the awkward stage of conversation.

但是，一旦有了那四秒鐘的停頓，我們就稱之為談話的尷尬階段。

Awkward means not comfortable.

尷尬的意思是不舒服。

It's very difficult when someone stops speaking for four second and just looks at you or looks

當一個人停止說話四秒鐘，只是看著你或者看著你的時候，這是很困難的。

away for you to start the conversation or keep it going.

離讓你開始對話或繼續下去。

It's like - and you're trying to get that heart started again.

這就像--你想讓那顆心重新開始。

It's a dead duck.

這是一隻死鴨子。

Leave it alone.

別管它了。

And even by now, the advice I'm going to give you, even if you use it, you've left the person

甚至到了現在，我要給你的建議，即使你用了，你也離開了這個人

with a bad taste in their mouth, so when they speak to you they're like, "Ugh, not that

有一個壞的味道在他們的嘴裡，所以當他們跟你說話，他們就像，"唉，不是這樣的。

person again."

的人了。"

So, what can we do about it?

那麼，我們能做些什麼呢？

Because we started out why is this important, which is you want to have as many people communicate

因為我們一開始為什麼這個很重要，就是你要有儘可能多的人交流。

with you as possible.

與你儘可能的。

And I've told you how you can figure out that they want to end the conversation in four

我已經告訴過你，你怎麼能弄清楚他們想在四種情況下結束對話。

steps, and we really want to get to this stage.

步，我們真的希望到這個階段。

And really, what I'm asking you to do is pay attention to the people you're speaking to.

而實際上，我要求你做的是注意你說話的對象。

Which is what you should be doing when you're learning language, to get the proper pronunciation,

這也是你在學習語言的時候應該做的，要掌握正確的發音。

learn vocabulary, and syntax.

學習詞彙，和文法。

So, we really want to be here.

所以，我們真的想在這裡。

But if we're not here, I've told you the other places you can kind of catch that they want

但如果我們不在這裡，我已經告訴了你其他的地方，你可以抓住他們想要的那種。

to end it.

來結束它。

So, here's what I'm going to tell you to do, okay?

所以，我現在要告訴你怎麼做，好嗎？

Once you see something like this happening, if you can catch it here, great.

一旦你看到這樣的事情發生，如果你能在這裡抓住它，很好。

At the very worst, if you get it here, here's what you do first.

在最壞的情況下，如果你在這裡得到它，這裡是你首先要做的。

You say, "Hey, it was nice talking to you.

你說："嘿，很高興和你哈拉。

It was nice seeing you or meeting you."

很高興見到你或認識你。"

Why did I say "It was nice" not "It is nice"?

為什麼我說 "很好 "而不是 "很好"？

By saying "it was nice", I'm saying I know this conversation was done, but it was a nice

我說 "很好"，是說我知道這個對話已經完成了，但這是一個很好的。

conversation and it's done.

談話就完成了。

So, you're freeing the other person, because it's like you finally got it.

所以，你在釋放對方，因為這就像你終於得到了它。

Oh ok, I get it.

哦，好吧，我明白了。

You don't want to talk, so it was nice talking to you.

你不想說話，所以很高興和你說話。

It was nice meeting you.

很高興認識你

This conversation is now done.

這次談話到此結束。

Now, that's the first part.

現在，這是第一部分。

But the second part is almost the most important part.

但第二部分幾乎是最重要的部分。

I'm sorry, I forgot, you can also use this, "Well, I've got to run."

對不起，我忘了，你也可以用這個，"好吧，我得走了。"

That kind of takes it - the power back in your position, that they've ended the conversation

那是一種把它 - 權力回到你的位置， 他們已經結束了對話。

but you're saying "and I'm ending it".

但你卻說 "我要結束它"。

It's not a competition, by the way, but you're going, "Well, I've got to run".

對了，這不是比賽，而是你要去 "嗯，我得跑"。

You're kind of releasing them again.

你又把他們放出來了。

You're saying okay, it's not you, it's me.

你說好，不是你，是我。

So, I've got to run so this conversation's over so you can relax.

所以，我得走了，所以這次談話結束，你可以放鬆。

So, in the future, you know I will take the responsibility for ending the conversation.

所以，以後，你知道我會負責結束談話。

But the second part, and that's why I wrote it in red, is once you've either said, "It

但第二部分，這就是為什麼我用紅色寫出來的原因，就是一旦你或者說 "它"。

was nice talking to you, seeing you, or meeting you."

很高興和你說話，看到你，或者遇見你。"

Or, you said, "Well, I've got to run", you have to do this.

或者，你說，"好吧，我得跑了"，你得這樣做。

"Well, it was nice talking to you.

"嗯，很高興和你哈拉。

See you later."

回頭見。"

And leave.

然後離開。

Exit.

退出。

Don't turn around and go, "But next week!" or "What about?"

不要轉身就說："可是下週！"或者 "怎麼辦？"

Nope, nobody wants to know about you.

不，沒有人想知道你的事。

Nobody cares anymore.

沒有人關心了。

You have to leave.

你必須離開。

You started to end the conversation, now finish it.

你開始結束談話，現在結束它。

So, you can say, "Well, I've got to run", and exit.

所以，你可以說 "好吧，我得走了"，然後退出。

It's not as bad as you think, because they've already started ending it for you anyway.

也沒有你想的那麼糟，反正他們已經開始給你做結局了。

You're just freeing them to go, "Oh", without "Oh my God, I hope I never see this person

你只是釋放他們去，"哦"，而不是 "哦，我的上帝，我希望我永遠不會看到這個人"。

again."

再次。"

Now, I've explained this to you and the importance of it.

現在，我已經向你解釋了這一點和它的重要性。

And it's a simple enough lesson that you can get it on its own.

而且這節課很簡單，你可以自己去學。

But what happens if it's you that's got to leave?

但如果是你要離開，會發生什麼？

How can you end a conversation in a nice way that that other person doesn't feel that you're

你怎麼能以一種很好的方式結束對話，讓對方不覺得你是在

being rude or - yeah, mean?

粗魯或 - 是的，意思是？

Come back and I'll give you some hints on that.

回來我給你一些提示。

Ready?

準備好了嗎？

Okay.

好吧，我知道了

So, through the magic of cinematography, we're back.

所以，通過電影攝影的魔力，我們回來了。

And that's basically camera on me, cinematography, movie magic.