Placeholder Image

字幕列表 影片播放

  • I entered my dorm room, took a seat at my desk, and thought about father's absence.

  • He conveniently left me a few weeks ago, just before I went to college.

  • And now I needed to figure things out for myself.

  • I pulled a pen and notebook out of my bag, and I wrote a question at the top of the first

  • page: how do I know if I'm on the right track?

  • I knew it was normal to feel lost in college, but I couldn't afford to be lost for long.

  • School started in a week, and I had chosen creative writing as my undergrad—a choice

  • father never would have approved of.

  • If I stayed lost for too long, I'd be thirty-thousand dollars in debt, with no job opportunities

  • to look forward to.

  • I stared at the question on the page.

  • For as long as I remembered, writing always helped me gain a sense of direction.

  • I started every essay with a question, because father told me the answers I find are only

  • as good as the questions I ask.

  • If an answer is the treasure, a question is the tool you use to find it,” he said

  • to me.

  • Use cheap tools, and you'll find cheap treasures.”

  • I believed father, because if I formulated a question well enough, sometimes the answer

  • just came to me on its own.

  • I was staring at the blank page, when I heard noises coming from behind my closet door.

  • At first, I ignored it and tried to write.

  • Father told me that Destiny calls to us, sweetly at first, like a mother calling her kids inside.

  • But if we ignored her for too long, she would get angry, and eventually, she would drag

  • us into her home, kicking and screaming.

  • He told me it was best to visit Destiny before she called.

  • It's just polite,” he said.

  • But in that moment, father's advice slipped my mind, and I wanted to finish my essay,

  • and besides, the noise was very faint, almost relaxing.

  • But it got louder and louder, and eventually, I could no longer ignore it.

  • I walked over to the closet door and placed my ear against it.

  • I heard seagulls squawking and waves gently crashing.

  • I worried there was a leak on the other side, because I had just moved in.

  • I opened the door slowly at first, so if any water spilled out, I could shut it again.

  • But when nothing spilled out, I decided to get it over with quickly.

  • Like ripping off a bandaid, I thrusted the door open.

  • The closet was dark, and the noise had stopped.

  • I stepped inside and analyzed the shelves closely, but I couldn't find the source

  • of the noise.

  • Maybe it had come from another room?

  • As I turned to leave the closet, I saw a blue light peaking out from under a cloth, on a

  • shelf near the door.

  • I walked over to the light, and as I approached, I heard the sound of waves gently crashing.

  • I grabbed the object, removed the cloth, and found a crystal ball underneath.

  • The ball emitted a gentle, blue light.

  • When I looked at it closely, I saw a beach inside.

  • The waves rocked back and forth, the seagulls took flight, and the sun descended into the

  • ocean.

  • But the image suddenly vanished, and smoke started to swirl inside the orb.

  • It shined more intensely and became warm to the touch, and honestly, I worried that it

  • would explode.

  • I placed it back on the shelf and hurried outside of the closet.

  • I waited for the sound of an explosion, but instead, I heard nothing.

  • What was going on?

  • I needed to know.

  • I crept back to the orb and looked closely.

  • I saw a newspaper with a list of bestselling books, and my name was on it!

  • The image faded into smoke.

  • Had the orb shown me the truth?

  • It must have!

  • How else could it have known I was a writer?

  • I had formulated the question, and the answer really came to me.

  • And father was proven wrong!

  • There's no money in writing,” he said.

  • Choose a real career, like law.”

  • But the crystal ball confirmed that I was on the right track, and he was wrong.

  • I walked out of the closet, placed the ball on my desk, and called up my friends.

  • After finding out I was going to be rich and successful, I wanted to celebrate!

  • I spent the next few days partying, and little did I know, that ruined everything.

  • A few days later, after several long nights of drinking, I woke up and saw the ball glowing

  • on my desk.

  • I leapt out of bed, ran over to the orb, and held it close to my face, smiling from ear

  • to ear.

  • My heart raced as the smoke inside the ball swirled.

  • When the image finally appeared, I felt sick to the pit of my stomach.

  • Instead of writing bestsellers, I saw myself on the streets, begging for change.

  • I waited for the crystal ball to show me another image, but it went dark, and I knew it had

  • nothing more to say.

  • I put it back down on my desk.

  • All the time I had spent partying must have changed my future.

  • I had fallen off the right track.

  • Father told me life was a game of sacrifices.

  • You can sacrifice the future for the present, or you can sacrifice the present for the future,”

  • he said to me.

  • But you have to pick one.”

  • Father was right.

  • He was always right.

  • My head hurt from all the drinking.

  • I had sacrificed my future for a few good nights.

  • But if I could do that, that meant I could do the opposite: sacrifice my present for

  • a better future.

  • I just needed self-discipline.

  • So I walked over to my door and locked it.

  • I took a seat at my desk, pulled out my phone, and saw a text from Samantha.

  • She asked if I wanted to hang out today.

  • I told her I was very busy for the next few days.

  • I shut off my phone and placed it face-down on the desk.

  • I pulled a notebook and pen out of the desk and began writing.

  • Hour after hour passed, and I wrote word after word after word.

  • I refused to get up unless I had to use the bathroom.

  • Sixteen hours passed, and I finally put the pen down.

  • I had written five-thousand words in total.

  • I walked over to my bed and collapsed.

  • I felt lonely and exhausted.

  • But father told me that a good sacrifice is painful.

  • It's like going to the gym,” he said.

  • “A little bit of pain makes you stronger.”

  • But what about a lot of pain, I thought.

  • I decided I was being a baby.

  • If you run from pain, you'll never be everything you could be,” father said to

  • me.

  • He was right, and the crystal ball even agreed with him.

  • When I woke up the next morning, I immediately started writing.

  • After a few hours, my hand cramped, so I took a small break to play with the orb.

  • I held it in my hands, analyzing it.

  • The crystal ball remained dark, and I worried that the light might never return.

  • In moments of crisis, when I needed to remain disciplined, only one thing ever helped me:

  • faith.

  • Father always gave me faith.

  • When I was younger, I wanted to play the piano, just like him.

  • I watched him play every evening, and he played so beautifully.

  • He gave me faith in the result, faith that the piano was worth learning.

  • He gave me faith in the goalin the future.

  • But he taught me how to play too.

  • In the evenings, when he practiced, he called me over to play with him.

  • He showed me the meanings of the different keys, and taught me a few songs.

  • He gave me faith in the process.

  • He gave me faith in the habit.

  • “A goal is a destination,” he said, “and habits are the road.

  • If you have faith in the destination, and faith in the road that will get you there,

  • you can drive forever,” he said to me.

  • I placed the orb back down on the desk and watched it.

  • It had given me faith in the destination.

  • I just needed it to validate that I was on the right road.

  • I started writing again, and I didn't put the pen down until 1AM.

  • By the end of the day, I had written five-thousand more words.

  • When I woke up the next day, I saw the orb shining again.

  • I threw the blanket off of me and ran towards it.

  • I felt like I had seen water for the first time after days of dehydration.

  • I picked up the crystal ball and watched the smoke swirl around inside.

  • My heart raced faster and faster as the smoke cleared up.

  • I saw myself at a bar, all alone, crying.

  • Why was I crying?

  • The image faded and another emerged.

  • Divorce papers.

  • I forgot about Sam.

  • The crystal ball went dark.

  • I put it down on the desk and proceeded to turn on my phone.

  • I had five missed calls, fifteen text messages, and a voicemailall from her.

  • I gave her a call.

  • Hey—”

  • Oh my god Tony, you're alive!

  • I tried calling you so many times.

  • I was worried.”

  • “I know, I know—I'm sorry.”

  • Is everything okay?

  • You've been acting differently since—”

  • Since what?”

  • Never mind.”

  • Since my father died?

  • I told you, I've gotten over it.”

  • No Tony.

  • You haven't even visited your father's grave since the funeral.”

  • “I've been busy working on this novel, and with school, and trying to make a future

  • for us.”

  • You're burying yourself in your work.

  • This isn't healthy.

  • “I know.

  • I just can't deal with that right now.

  • Can I see you?”

  • Okay fine, but we'll have to talk about it eventually.”

  • "I'll be over soon.”

  • “I'll be waiting,” she said and hung up.

  • I spent the rest of the evening at her house.

  • The next day, I sat at my desk and took a deep breath.

  • I needed to rethink how I spent my time.

  • I looked at the clock on my wall.

  • Father told me time was a gift.

  • You're given a limited number of hours each day,” he said.

  • How you invest those hours determines your future.”

  • The orb showed me what a bad investor I was.

  • I had broken the cardinal sin: never put your eggs in one basket.

  • I invested all my time into work, and that wasn't going to lead me to the future I

  • wanted.

  • I needed to invest in love too, and like any change, that required a sacrifice.

  • I spent the first half of my day writing.

  • I wrote as many words as I could muster until 6PM.

  • Then I put the pen down and spent my evening with Sam.

  • I didn't even have time to cook.

  • Every night I sat in my office, eating pizza or fast-food.

  • When I got into bed that night, I felt better.

  • I felt less alone and less exhausted.

  • I decided that this would be my new schedule.

  • A week later, I sat at my desk and looked at the calendar on my wall.

  • I had finished the first week of school.

  • To keep up my schedule, I slept less.

  • I went to class in the mornings, wrote in the evenings, then spent some time with Sam

  • after.

  • For the first time, I lacked the energy to write.

  • Words no longer flowed out of me like they used to.

  • My brain felt foggy.

  • I looked at the orb.

  • It was still dark.

  • I needed to know if I was on the right track.

  • Would I land the book deal and marry Sam?

  • I needed to keep going until the orb validated the path I was on.

  • I walked into my kitchen, made a coffee, and brought it back to my desk.

  • It was my first coffee in years, but I needed it to get over this dip in energy.

  • I sat down at my desk and continued writing.

  • Afterwards, I spent time with Sam.

  • Then I came home and ate a pizza.

  • I climbed into bed at 2AM that night, my brain foggy and my stomach rounder than a week ago.

  • Two months passed, and I gained over thirty pounds.

  • I sat at my desk, and finally, after my third coffee that day, the orb lit up.

  • I leapt up from my desk and reached for the ball, my palm dripping with sweat.

  • I lifted it up towards my face and watched it closely.

  • The smoke swirled around before revealing the first image: me, at the doctors.

  • I looked really overweight, and the doctor pointed towards my chest.

  • Another image appeared: my tombstone.

  • Based on the dates, I died at the age of thirty-five.

  • The orb went dark.

  • My heart sank, and I put the orb down on my desk.

  • What would be the point of doing all this hard work if I was going to pass away at such

  • a young age?

  • I realized discipline and love were not enough.

  • I needed good health to achieve the future I wanted.

  • I decided to stop working for the day and went to sleep.

  • When I woke up the next day, I went straight to my desk.

  • But this time, I stopped working after a few hours and went to the gym instead.

  • After the gym, I came back to the apartment and continued writing for a few more hours.

  • Then I prepared a healthy dinner and spent time with Sam.

  • That was my new routine.

  • And honestly, at the end of each day, I felt good.

  • I felt the best I had in years.

  • After a week of this routine, when I woke up one morning, I saw the crystal ball light

  • up again.

  • I got out of bed and ran over to it.

  • Would the ball finally show me what I wanted to see?

  • I reached for it, my palms dripping with sweat.

  • I picked it up and watched it closely, pacing around the room.

  • The smoke swirled around inside.

  • I brought my head closer as the smoke started to clear, and just as an image began to emerge,

  • I stubbed my toe against the desk and dropped the crystal ball onto the floor.

  • It shattered into a thousand pieces.

  • I spent days trying to piece the crystal ball back together, but nothing worked.

  • A few weeks later, I stood at my father's grave with Sam.

  • I told her everything: how I found the crystal ball, how it showed me success, the divorce,

  • my death, and how it affected my decisions.

  • I told her how it gave me faith, certainty, and how I felt lost without it.

  • I expected her to think I was crazy.

  • But she put her arm around me and said, “I get it.

  • I had a crystal ball too.”

  • I looked at her, confused.

  • You did?”

  • Yeah, Lucy.”

  • Lucy was her older sister.

  • She passed away from leukaemia a few years ago.

  • Oh, I'm sorry.”

  • Don't be.

  • I felt lost when she went away too.”

  • How did you manage?”

  • Well, when you spent all day working, you felt terrible, right?

  • You said you felt lonely and exhausted.”

  • Yeah.”

  • And then you saw the divorce right?”

  • Right.”

  • And when you started eating unhealthy and drinking coffee, you said you felt tired and

  • foggy, right?”

  • Right.”

  • And then you saw your death?”

  • Yeah.”

  • Well, why do you need that crystal ball?

  • Your own body told you that you were off the right track before the ball did.”

  • “I guess.”

  • So why don't you keep following your feelings?

  • Listen to your body, and take it one day at a timethat's what I do.

  • I try to make each day complete in itself.”

  • How do you do that?”

  • It's like an art.

  • I add and subtract habits from my day, and I try to make it something I can be happy

  • with.

  • I try designing a day that I'd be happy living over again.

  • I don't know exactly where it will take me, but I think it will take me where I'm

  • meant to go.

  • And sure, sometimes I have bad days, or what worked for me before doesn't work anymore,

  • but that's life.

  • I just try and come back to designing the day.

  • I ask myself, am I happy with the structure of my day right now?

  • Can I keep repeating this?”

  • I gave Sam

  • a hug.

  • “I think I'll try that.”

I entered my dorm room, took a seat at my desk, and thought about father's absence.

字幕與單字

單字即點即查 點擊單字可以查詢單字解釋

B1 中級

水晶球--一個關於習慣和目標的故事。 (THE CRYSTAL BALL - a story about habits and goals)

  • 2 1
    Summer 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
影片單字