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  • Good news from the airline industry,

  • where one successful company is thanking its employees

  • in the only way that counts, with cash.

  • We're learning more about a mega bonus

  • that employees at Delta Airlines are getting.

  • The company was so profitable last year,

  • it's giving back $1.6 billion.

  • The bonus equals about two months' extra pay

  • for each employee.

  • One reason the company had such a good year is

  • it does not fly the Boeing 737 Max,

  • which has been grounded for months.

  • That's right. Delta crushed it this year,

  • mostly because they have planes that can land.

  • Yeah. Which is apparently something customers prefer.

  • And it's ironic. It's really ironic,

  • because, last year, people were shitting on Delta

  • for not having the newest planes. Right?

  • Then new planes started crashing,

  • and so now Delta's in the lead. Yeah.

  • You know what this is? This is how your friend

  • with a flip phone feels whenever someone with an iPhone

  • gets hacked. Yeah. They're just like,

  • "That's right. Who's got the lame-ass phone now?

  • "Yeah, if you want to hack my nudes,

  • "you got to come to my house, you iCloud-having mother(bleep).

  • "Now, if you excuse me, I have to make a call,

  • because I can't text. Hello?"

  • So, good for Delta, sharing their profits with employees.

  • Of course, not to be outdone,

  • Spirit Airlines has announced

  • that they're going to let their employees keep any gum

  • they find under the armrests.

  • Spirit Airlines.

  • Our planes don't have trash cans.

  • They are trash cans.

  • (gasping, laughter)

  • (cheering and applause)

  • Moving on.

  • Moving on to the world of sports.

  • Have you ever watched your team losing

  • and wished that you could jump in to help?

  • Well, that's exactly what this North Carolina dad did.

  • A North Carolina man was arrested

  • after getting too involved

  • in his son's high school wrestling match.

  • At one point, the wrestler in the gray uniform

  • picks up the wrestler in the black uniform,

  • slams him to the ground.

  • The referee ruled the move was illegal and blew the whistle.

  • But, moments later, a man runs out

  • -and knocks the wrestler to the ground. -(gasping)

  • -It was the other boy's dad. -Ugh.

  • The man was arrested, charged with assault

  • and disorderly conduct.

  • Goddamn!

  • What was that father thinking?

  • You can't just run in from the sidelines

  • and beat up a teenager.

  • Your son has to tag you in first.

  • Come on!

  • Rules of wrestling!

  • And if you think that's bad,

  • you should've seen him at his daughter's ballet recital.

  • That shit is insane.

  • And, look, I get the dad's anger.

  • But you realize this thing could have gotten out of hand, right?

  • 'Cause no one thinks about this,

  • but what if the other wrestler's dad saw it happen

  • and then he jumped in, right?

  • And then what if the first dad's dad

  • jumped in to help him,

  • then the other guy's grandfather jumped in,

  • then a coffin just lands on all of them?

  • Got to think of these things.

  • But this is why I never bring my mom to the Emmys.

  • Parents are really competitive. Yeah.

  • If I brought my mom to the Emmys

  • and then she sees me lose to John Oliver,

  • she'll rush the podium and tackle him to the ground.

  • Yeah. Poor John will be on the ground screaming,

  • "Holy shit, I've just been tackled by a woman

  • "from South Africa.

  • "And, by the way, that's not South Africa.

  • That's South Africa."

  • All right, and, finally, speaking of surprise tackles,

  • Hillary Clinton is back in the news,

  • and this time she's coming for Bernie.

  • This morning, we are hearing for the first time

  • explosive comments from Hillary Clinton

  • about her 2016 Democratic challenger Bernie Sanders.

  • In an interview with The Hollywood Reporter,

  • Clinton will not commit to backing Sanders

  • if he is the Democratic nominee in 2020.

  • She also doubles down on comments that she made

  • in an upcoming documentary in which she said,

  • "Nobody likes him on the Hill."

  • HARLOW: This is Hillary Clinton speaking.

  • "He was in Congress for years. He had one senator support him.

  • "Nobody likes him, nobody wants to work with him,

  • "he got nothing done. He was a career politician.

  • "It's all just baloney and I feel so bad

  • that people got sucked into it."

  • The reporter asks, "Does that assessment still hold?"

  • And she says, "Yes, it does."

  • And then she goes on, "If he gets the nomination,

  • will you endorse and campaign for him?"

  • And she says, "I'm not going to go there yet."

  • (murmuring, groaning)

  • Hillary, what are you doing?

  • The election is just about to begin,

  • and now you're coming out throwing punches?

  • This is not the time to reopen old wounds.

  • You can just say, "As Democrats,

  • we always support our nominee"

  • and then go home and punch that bag you have

  • with Bernie's face on it.

  • 'Cause, like, what does that even mean?

  • Let's be honest. What does that mean?

  • Hillary won't support Bernie?

  • So if he's the nominee, who else

  • is she gonna campaign for, Trump?

  • Actually, I'd love to see that. I won't lie. I mean...

  • No, that would be amazing, if Trump was just up there, like,

  • "Ladies and gentlemen,

  • "please welcome my friend

  • Crooked Hillary!"

  • Like, Hillary comes out.

  • "Hello, everybody!

  • "Lock me up! Lock me up!

  • Lock me up!"

  • But, look, man, as much as I don't agree

  • with Hillary's timing, I don't think

  • she's completely wrong about Bernie not being well-liked

  • in Washington, because Bernie himself has said this.

  • Right? He said he doesn't do pleasantries.

  • He's not trying to be nice with people.

  • He doesn't schmooze and rub elbows.

  • He's just there to do what he's there to do.

  • And, honestly, that's what I like about Bernie.

  • His personality is kind of like

  • the beginning of a Snickers commercial. You know?

  • Just like, "Bernie, you're not yourself when you're hungry.

  • Have this." He's like, "Bullshit.

  • "I don't like chocolate, and I don't like you.

  • Get that shit out of my face!"

Good news from the airline industry,

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希拉里-克林頓對伯尼的攻擊,三角洲的工人獎金,以及爸爸的摔跤技巧|《每日秀》。 (Hillary Clinton’s Attack on Bernie, Delta’s Worker Bonus, & Dad’s Wrestling Tackle | The Daily Show)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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