Sorry, I was just busy respecting women.

抱歉 我剛剛正在忙著尊重女人

My name is "nice guy PewDiePie", and I've collected millions of followers, just like yourself who are

我的名子叫"好人pewdiepie"而我已經收集了成千上萬的好人粉絲 而在螢幕的各位

just that - nice guys. We spend most of our days respecting whamen and putting them first. Just that, nice guys.

也是一名 "好人粉絲"

Just that, nice guys.

我們會花一整天的時間來尊重女人 禮讓女人

We spend most of our days respecting women and putting them first

並想著" 我們怎麼樣才能進步 怎樣才能繼續壓抑著我們心中的惡魔"

Thinking, "How can we be better? How can we be less horrible demons, creatures of the night?"

加入我吧 !

Join me!

至於我們現在 要 .. 做的是

As we will now.. G0-gO-G-g00

看看一些網路的大好人們

Go through some of the nicest guys on the internet

就像你和我一樣

Just like me, and just like you.

但如果你還不是一個好人的話

Or at least if you're not yet...

你也可以慢慢學習

u could become a nice guy

讓我們一起來看 "好人們"的reddit板

Let's check out the "nice guy" subreddit....

然後一起為地球上的大好人們歡呼

And celebrate..some of the nicest people on the planet

" 好人"

Nice Guys

工作人員: 請問您有什麼事情嗎 ?

"Operator: what is your emergency?"

女人: 救命阿 有男生闖進我家裡了

"Please help, some men broke into my home."

工作人員:可不是所有男生都會闖進你家 我就不會..

"Not all men are like that. I wouldn't do that."

XDDD

*laugh*

身為一個"好人" 我可是永遠不會闖入別的女生的家

As a fellow nice guy myself, I would never break into another wahmen's home

但是 如果裡面也有一個男的話 我會考慮看看喔 ( 想幹嘛 ?

If there was a man in there perhaps, I would consider it...

但我一定會確保那位女性感到無比的安全

...but I would make sure the woman was feeling safe.

因為我可是"大好人pewdiepie"

Cuz I'm a nice guy Pewdiepie,

如果你也跟我一樣是個"好人" 你也一定會懂的

and if you were a nice guy as well, you would understand.

我討厭被當工具人

"I hate the friend zone

你幫一個女生泡牛奶 然後他還不跟你啪啪

You make a girl chocolate milk, and she won't have some fun

真的太誇張了 我牛奶泡假的嗎?

sex with you.

XDD

"Unbelievable, what's the point?"

我幫這個婊子

*laugh*

泡牛奶 ! 我已經很努力了 !!!

I made this bitch

我還幫你泡巧克力口味的!!! 為什麼你就是不喜歡我 QQ

Chocolate! I gave you my everything

我可是一個大好人阿 Q.Q

I'm making chocolate milk!!! Why don't you love me?

為什麼阿 Lisa 為什麼 拜託你跟我說說話

I'M SUCH A NICE GUY!!!

為什麼那些女人總是喜歡上渣男 ..

[Tommy-san] "Why Lisa, why Lisa? Please TALK to me, PLEASE!"

如果她們知道 ..

Why do all these women pick all these douche bags?

我是一個多棒的好男人

If they only knew...

婊子們一定會像河水般滔滔不絕的擁上來阿

What a nice guy I am!

Lisa: ...你嚇到我了

Bitches would be all over me!

今天我在Melbourne看到的塗鴉

[Lisa] You're scaring me.

"好人"們如何把女生搞上床

"Graffiti I saw in Melbourne today."

"我對那個女生好的次數"集點卡 BY@Lushsux

"How nice guys think sex works."

不要鬧了 ... 好歹用信用卡吧 ..

"Times are respected women." This is @Lushsux

還集點卡哩 ..

Come on at least credit

我們看起來真像情侶 哈哈哈哈 一對好"朋友"

Credit the man properly!

喔不... 大家幫這個男的默哀三秒鐘 ...

"We look so much like a couple here. Ha ha ha, ha ha. A couple of BESTIES!"

那真的很痛阿 各位 ...

Oh nooo. Everyone, a moment of silence for this man

每個人都可以看到那個婊子她媽直接發那個男的卡阿 ..

That's gonna, that's gonna fuckin sting. You know everyone's

我: 我想要成為一個芬蘭的市民

gonna see that be like god damn that bitch got cucked the fuck out, man.

櫃臺:好的

"Me:

我:我猜吧 ..

I'd like to become a citizen of Finland."

櫃臺:你去排最後

"Oh, nice!"

我:為什麼

"Uh, I guess."

櫃臺:好人永遠不是第一個的 (譯者不會翻 QQ

"Back of line."

做的好阿 !

"Why?"

嘿 嘿 聽聽這個: 你是芬蘭人嗎 ? 不 我是瑞典人

"Nice guys FINNISH last."

*尷尬拍手*

*clapping* Good job

啊 !

Hey, hey, how about this one, "Hey are you Finnish? No, I am Swedish!!

我很驕傲的身為一名處男

*clapping*

因為我不像你們這種

Ahh!

遍地撥種的渣男!!

"Yes, I am proud virgin."

我可是相當尊敬女人阿!

"Because unlike you,"

XDDD

"sexually activated SAVAGES,"

痾 ...

"I actually respect women!"

我永遠不會 ... 永遠不會

Ugh.

把我的小兄弟放到你身邊的!

I would never ever

真可惜你不是一個女生 因為如果你的嘴唇可是有許多淺力阿

Put ANY genitals anywhere near you!

男:哀 我真希望有女生可以不要在乎我的外表

It's a shame with those dick sucking lips, too. You had a lot of potential

只喜歡我的個人特質

"Sigh, I wish some girl could see past my looks and"

女:我愛你Robert 男: 好喔 可是你好醜

"Just like me for who I am."

*笑*

"I love you Robert." "Yes, but you're ugly"

這就像是 "好人"們總是在追自己不可能追到的女神 我覺得那個才是重點阿 我是說 .. 不 !

*laugh*

他們會變成好人只是因為他們心中沒有壞壞的思想 好嗎 ?

It's always like... nice guys is always just guys going for girls out of their league. I think that's the issue I mean NO!

他們可不是那種壞壞渣男阿 (這句不太確定

They are nice guys because in their heart they have good intention, okay?

嘴爆你啦 !!

They're not some sexually charged

馬利歐 真感謝你把我救出來 讓我親你一下

SAVAGES.

我可是通過了八個充滿怪物的世界啊 親愛的公主 ... 你給我脫掉你的內..

"Mario you saved me, to thank you here is a kiss!"

在我玩最新一代的馬力歐的時候 我真的有說出這一句話 因為你為公主做牛做馬你最好

"I crossed eight worlds full of monsters my princess. Take off your pan-"

不要只給我一個吻喔

I actually said this when I played the latest Super Mario cuz you do so much shit to save her right? I'm like, she better

...我好像失言了

Bish better put out

哈 !

Probably shouldn't add that in.

這倒底是在畫三小啦 ! XDDD

Ha...!

我不是你那種無趣的工具人 因為 我可以讓你滿足一整夜

What are they supposed to mean?!

是厚 ..

My god. "I'm not your average nice guy, cuz I can give you orgasm

我對女人從不說謊 ... lol

You'll never forget!"

所以你只對男生說謊囉 ? (譯者不懂QQ

"Doubt it."

OH !

"I don't lie to women... lol."

我不相信

"So you only lie to men?"

那種老派的約會觀念

OH!

先約會在結婚 然後如果我看了你的個人檔案 我有可能會嫁給別人喔

"I don't believe in

很好阿 這真是一個天大的巧合 在他被打槍後就馬上像變了一個人一樣 真棒啊

antiquated concept of dating,

這招每次都有用

Relationship and married." "After seeing your profile, I have changed my mind~."

你好 我叫stan 很高興認識你

Good thing - yeah, what a great coincidence! He changed his mind right after he got rejected. That's good!

你是如此的有吸引力 而我也深深愛著你的可愛臉龐

They worked out great for everyone!

二十分鐘後

"Hello. I'm Stan, nice to meet you.

給我閉嘴!你個婊子 我可以把你打到你媽都認不出你來

You're so attractive to me, and I love your cute face."

你竟然讓我等二十分鐘 ?!! 啊啊啊

20 minutes later...

我也許是個工具人

"STUCK UP BITCH. I COULD BEAT THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF YOU-

我本來是一個好好人叫做Stan 但是如果你讓我等二十分鐘

You made me wait twenty minutes? Arrgh!!

我就會發怒在你身上 你個臭ㄅㄧㄠ子

I may be a nice guy...

女生常常都說自己遇不到好男人 可是他們都忘了我

I may be a nice guy named Stan, but if you make me wait twenty minutes,

這就像是 你說你餓了 可是地板上有一根熱狗

Then my fury will be unleashed upon on you, you stuck up B WORD.

那篇推文真讚

"It's stupid when girls say they can't find a guy yet, they ignore me."

"為什麼會有人吸毒來尋求快樂 我為女生服務就嗨翻了" 我也是阿

"It's like saying you're hungry when there's a hot dog on the ground."

當一個可以被信任的"好人" 可是世界上最令人

*laugh*

興奮的事情了呢

That's a good tweet.

"我有一個男朋友了 我對你不感興趣 抱歉

"Why would anyone drink or do drugs I get high off respecting women." Me too and anyone

你就像其他女生一樣..

That's a nice guy can relate. It's one of the most joyous

...一樣的醜陋

adventures you can go on. It's very rewarding.

沒必要沒禮貌啊

"I have a boyfriend that's nice, but I'm not interested, sorry."

我沒禮貌 ? 你才沒禮貌 你全家都沒禮貌

"You are as every girl...

我怎麼沒禮貌了

...ugly."

每個女生都馬一樣

"No need to be rude."

為什麼呢 ?

"Why me? You are rude. No me."

你們都騙人 心機重 還有不給我...

"How am I rude?"

夠了 .. 你在公三小

"Every girls are the same."

這種好人..一個機會 ...."

"How come?"

我同情這個男的 你一定要給這個"工具人"的一個機會阿 他值得這個機會阿

"You all lie, cheat, not give me.."

"啊我就有男朋友了

"Okay, what the fuck?"

我希望他有小三 ... 你應得的 你這個醜女

"A good guy... a chance."

希望你去死 ... " XDDD

I feel for this man. You gotta give the good man a chance! A good guy deserves his chance!

好啦 已讀 希望你去死

"I already have a boyfriend."

我覺得每位男性都應該使用#Notme 來表示大多數的男性都是好人 永遠不會攻擊與欺凌女性

"I hope he cheat on you. You deser-be that. You ugly."

我們深深愛著他們 跟榮耀他們

"Hope you die" *laugh*

是阿 #Notme

Okay, now. Goodbye. Hope you die.

真的有人想到用 #Notme 這種主意 .... 我是好人喔..

"I think men should post 'Not Me' to show that most of us are good men who would never assault or abuse women..."

嘿 安娜

"Yet, we love and honor them!"

今天有英文回家功課嗎?

Yes. #NotMe

沒有

Someone actually thought this. Oh my god. #NotMe. Not me. I'm a nice guy

真是謝謝你!

"Hey Anna"

不客氣 朋友

"Was there English homework?"

痾 .. 你在幹嘛 ?

"Nope."

準備大學的報告

"Thank you so much!"

很好阿 我在看閃電俠 你還在嗎?

"No problem, dude"

在 我剛剛在寫功課 抱歉

"So what's up?"

我們可以談談嗎 ?

"Filling out college applications."

好阿

"Cool, I'm watching the flash... you there?"

你真的要談談嗎 ?

"Yeah, sorry. I was focused on my work."

OK啊

"Can we talk about something?"

讓我們聊聊電影 你最喜歡那一部電影 ?

"Okay dude."

男:你喜歡恐怖片嗎 ?

"Do you even want to talk?"

女:喜歡阿

"I can talk."

男:那你最喜歡那一部 ?

"Let's talk about movies. What's your favorite movie?"

我想看看 .... 我覺得是星際異攻隊

[Man on phone] Do you like scary movies?

我不知道诶 我覺得你好像在逗我

[Woman] Uh huh.

三小 ?

[Man on phone] What's your favorite scary movie?

大家都知道我喜歡超級英雄

"Let me think... I like Guardians of the Galaxy"

..很多人也喜歡阿

"If I didn't know better. I think you were trying to impress me."

OK 那就代表我們兩個有相同興趣囉 所以我們兩個其實還蠻速配的

"What?"

你森77嗎 ?

"Everyone knows I love superheroes."

沒有 我沒事幹嘛對你生氣

"Lots of people like them."

痾 我以為你沒回我 是因為你在生氣 我猜的啦 抱歉

"Well, it's cool that we have this in common. We actually are pretty similar if you think about it."

真的沒事啦 我現在真的在忙啦

"Are you mad at me?"

痾 那等你沒那麼忙的時候..

"No, why would I be mad at you?"

你願意跟我約會嗎 我會帶你去很好的餐廳跟一起看電影

"Oh, well you didn't respond, so I just assumed. I'm sorry"

痾 我不太確定

"Nah, it's all good. I'm just swamped right now."

我男朋友看到會不會生氣

"Well when you aren't busy...

你語氣也不用那麼差吧

...would you like to go on a date with me? I'll treat you to a nice dinner take you to a movie."

女:你到底要幹嘛啦 !!!!

"Not sure how much

男:看一下你心中在想什麼啊

the boyfriend would like that."

你一直都在敷衍我 ! * 瑞典好人大叫中 *

"Well, you don't have to be so rude about it."

我的天阿 ...

*laughs*

我受不了了 我的老天鵝啊 當個好好人真難受 這個引火線有點太短了

[Woman] What do you want?!

我今天已經禮讓女人三次了 讓我上他

[Man] To see what your insides look like.

屁啦 明明愛情就不是那樣運作的

"You've been short with me this entire conversation!! *yells in swedish nice guy*"

明明就是 !

Oh my god...!

明明就是 !

I can't Jesus Christ. It's tough being a nice guy. We got a - we got a short fuse.

Irma是個很可愛的名子 我在想...

"I rspected wahmen three times today. Lemme smash."

她會看到我的約會邀請 然後跟我一起出去

"That's not how it works."

...那不是颱風的名子嗎 ?

YES IT IS!

我男朋友 ... 真是個渾蛋

YES IT IS!!

我的女士阿 您值得更好的 我永遠都會尊敬女士您的

Oh!

WOW 你真是個"好人"啊

"Irma is a cute name. Maybe if I stay..

老實說 有一點太好了

"..She'll see my dedication to her and and will go out with me."

不 !!!!!!!!!!!

"The hurricane?"

她媽的 我的友善

"My boyfriend, what a jerk."

真是種詛咒

"M'lady surely deserves better! I would always treat you with utmost respect!"

我就是永遠不會被愛

"Wow, you are the nicest man I've ever met."

只因為我太.. " 好"了

"In fact, TOO NICE!"

你有什麼煩心事嗎?

"NOOOOOOOO!"

對男生非常的害羞..以及不舒服 ....

*laughs*

我要怎麼拯救這個女士

Damn me and my niceness!

一起看吧

ARGH! CURSE ME!

我同意 男人有很渣的那種 但 ...

I am just not allowed to love...

注意 !

For I am just too nice.

一定要表明 我不是渣男

"What were you bullied for?"

在外面也有一些男生是非常有禮貌的紳士 就像我

"For being shy and uncomfortable around boys."

在外面 ..

ATATATATA

的某處 ...

tatataaa!

如果你真的是一個紳士的話 那你應該不要跟別人一直說你是一個紳士

How can I make this about me?

你就當好你的紳士就好了

Let's see!

就像我一樣!!!!

"I agree. Us men can be literal assholes, but-"

如果你是個"好人"的話 請按個讚 其實不管你是誰 你都是一個好人

But!

這裡是你們的主持人 "好人pewdiepie" 而現在我要去尊敬女性了

Gotta add in that - I'm not an asshole

每天都要做的阿

"There are some lovely and generous gentlemen like ME...

兄弟幫撤退™

...out there...

男:你喜歡恐怖片嗎 ?

...Somewhere!"

男:喜歡阿

If you're an actual nice person, you shouldn't have to try so hard to let everyone else know that you're a nice person,

女:那你最喜歡哪一部恐怖片

You should just be a nice person.

*體悟心靈祥和的音樂*

Just like MEEEE!

Leave a like if you're a nice guy. No matter who you are, if you're a nice guy

This has been your host, nice guy Pewdiepie. Now, excuse me while I keep on respecting wahmen.

Everyday, bro.

Squad Fam Out™

[Man on phone] You like scary movies?

[Woman] Uh huh.

[Man on phone] What's your favorite scary movie?

*peaceful music*