Yeah, I saw one get interviewed on 60 Minutes, the top journalistic program in the United States.

我看到一個機器人在美國頂尖的新聞雜誌節目《六十分鐘》受訪。

And he's just sitting there, getting interviewed, not nervous at all, just rattling off all the f**king answers.

他就坐在那裡受訪，完全不緊張，吧啦吧啦地回答所有他 X 的問題。

You know, not smoking, not f**king, you know, leaking oil, whatever you would do as a nervous robot, right?

不抽煙、不漏油，隨便一些機器人緊張時才會做的事，對吧？

And the reporter's asking him questions, in the end he goes, "So tell us", he's like, "What are your goals?"

記者在問他問題，最後他問了：「告訴我們吧，你的目標是什麼？」

And I am alone in a hotel room, and I literally lean towards the TV, I'm like, did these f**king things have goals?

然後我獨自坐在飯店房間，整個人往電視靠過去，心裡想著「這些他 X 的東西有目標？！」

And the f**king robot just answers, he just goes, "Well, what are your goals?", and the robot goes, "To become smarter than human beings."

那他 X 的機器人直接回答，主持人問：「所以你的目標是什麼？」，機器人說：「我要比人類更聰明。」

Yeah, and the reporter just blows by it, he's like, "Okay, and, 'what's your favorite color?'"

記者也不鳥機器人說了什麼，又問：「喔，那你最喜歡的顏色是什麼？」

Meanwhile, I'm standing on my bed yelling at the TV, like, "Dude, unplug that f**king thing!"

在那同時，我站在床上對電視大吼：「老兄，把那他 X 的玩意的插頭拔掉！」

"Take the batteries out!"

「把電池拔出來！」

"Pull the wires out, do something!"

「把他的電線拉出來，快點做些什麼！」

How many sci-fi movies do you have to see before you realize where this is going?

要看過多少科幻電影，你才能明白這會導向哪裡？

So anyways, every smart person, every super-smart person in the world, is saying these f**king things are gonna kill us.

無論如何，世界上每個超級聰明的人，都在說這些他 X 的東西會殺了我們。

Even your boy here, the guy who, he recently died.

其中有個聰明的男生，最近死了。

What was his name?

他叫什麼啊？

He was always sitting down.

他總是坐著。

Hawkins, Stephen Hawkins (Hawking), yeah!

啊，霍金啦，史蒂芬霍金！

Too good to f**king stand up and make his point, just sitting down all f**king smarmy.

他根本懶得站起來說他的論點，就坐在那裡他 X 的「黏著」。

Oh, I care so much, I poured ice on myself!

喔！我很在乎噢，我有玩冰桶挑戰！

And I showed off my abs at the same time, for the 'gram!

為了節目，我還順便秀出我的腹肌喔！

Nah, I'm just f**king with you.

沒有啦，我只是在開玩笑。

I am so glad that guy's f**king dead, though.

我只是很慶幸那傢伙掛了。

Look at you guys, your heart—how much longer do you want him to suffer?

看看你們，你們還想要他受苦多久？

You don't believe in an afterlife?

你們不相信來生嗎？

Maybe he's up there now, his f**king legs work, he's getting an angelic bl**job, how much longer do you want him to f**king sit there so you can feel better about yourself?

也許他現在在天堂，他腳能動了，有天使幫他吹喇巴，不然你們還希望他坐在那裡、讓你們自我感覺良好多久？

Well, at least I'm not all f**king twisted up, saying smart shit, right?

至少我沒有心態扭曲，說些聰明的屁話，對吧？

I couldn't f**king stand that guy.

我完全不能忍受霍金。

He was so f**king negative, he never had anything positive to say!

他超級負面，從來沒說過正面的話！

Hey Steve, what have you got for us today?

嘿史蒂芬，你有啥想告訴我們的嗎？

"In 2035 there'll be no more apples."

「在 2035 年，世上不會再有蘋果了。」

Thank you, Steve, thanks a lot!

噢，謝謝史蒂芬，超級感謝你！

Wasn't thinking about that, now I am.

原本沒在想這件事，現在我開始想了。

Hey, so what's the solution?

嘿，所以解決辦法是什麼？

"It's too late, we needed to try 40 years ago."

「太晚了，我們四十年前就該嘗試了。」

Thanks a lot buddy, I'm gonna go cry with my child now!

兄弟，真是謝了，我現在直接跟我小孩抱在一起哭好了！

Dude I could hang out with that guy for about three minutes before I took the brake off his chair and just zoomed him into the other room.

我大概只能跟那傢伙共處三分鐘，之後就會直接把他輪椅的煞車鬆掉，把他送進另個房間。

Hey Steve, come back here when you got something dumb and positive to say!

嘿史蒂芬，有又笨又正面的話說時再回來吧！