Placeholder Image

字幕列表 影片播放

已審核 字幕已審核
  • Have a seat.

    請坐。

  • I know that noise is all because it's day nine of 12 Days of Giveaways.

    你們會那麼躁動,一定是因為今天是 12 天長假的第 9 天。

  • I know that.

    我知道的。

  • We'll get to your gifts a little later.

    禮物等等再給你們。

  • First, I want to talk about something that'll help you get through the stress of the holidays... liquor.

    首先,我想來談談,可以幫助你們度過假日高壓的東西...酒精。

  • I'm kidding.

    開玩笑的。

  • I'm talking about reality TV.

    我是在講實境節目。

  • I think that they're starting to run out of ideas for shows.

    我覺得他們節目的點子應該枯竭了吧?

  • There are so many shows that get green-lit.

    有那麼多節目被放行。

  • People like, yep, put that on.

    而人們就是,好啊都放給我們看。

  • I saw one, this is called Wrap Battle, and it's a competitive world of wrapping presents.

    我看過一個節目,叫 Wrap Battle,講述一個人人都在包禮物,競爭激烈的世界。

  • And it gets about as dramatic as you'd think that it would, which is not at all, but boy, they try to make it dramatic.

    它試著要讓節目很有張力,但結果一點也不,但,他們盡力了。

  • Who turned off my hot glue gun?

    誰把我的熱熔膠槍關了?

  • Who did that?

    到底是誰?

  • Uh-oh, sabotage.

    噢喔,有人做壞事喔!

  • Seriously, somebody turned off my hot glue gun.

    真的,有人把我的熱熔膠槍關掉。

  • I want to know who did it.

    我想知道誰做的。

  • I'm not joking.

    我沒在開玩笑。

  • I'm going to find out who did it.

    我會找出誰是兇手。

  • OK.

    好喔。

  • If anybody in this room is going to turn off my hot glue gun, I think it would be Olga.

    這房間裡最有可能關掉我熱熔膠槍的人,我想一定是 Olga。

  • I need to, I just want to tell you that it's not me.

    我只想說不是我關的。

  • I did not like the way you looked at me.

    我不喜歡妳看我的方式。

  • I did not sabotage no one.

    我才沒有破壞任何人的作品。

  • I'm too busy for that.

    我自己已經夠忙了。

  • Your reputation precedes you, and that is not on me.

    妳自己有壞名聲,這不能怪我。

  • Hey, stop it.

    嘿,別吵了。

  • Sure, blame the Russians.

    當然,怪俄羅斯人就對了。

  • Yeah, really, blame her.

    真的,怪她啊!

  • Tune in next week to find out who gets a paper cut.

    繼續收看,下週揭曉誰會被紙劃傷。

  • It's really--

    這真是...

  • Here's how I know when there are too many reality shows.

    下面這個,讓我明白實境節目真的太多了。

  • They've just stopped trying to be real.

    多到他們放棄要「實」境了。

  • This is called South Beach Tow and the acting on this "reality" show is unbelievable.

    這齣「實」境節目叫做 South Beach Tow,而裡頭的人真的演很大。

  • I know what I got to do, ma'am.

    我知道我該做什麼。

  • I'm here to repossess your car.

    我是來拖走你的車的。

  • Hey, Dave!

    嘿,Dave!

  • Lift....

    舉起...

  • Which one is lift?

    哪個按鈕是舉起?

  • You is not going nowhere.

    妳哪兒都不能去。

  • You better get out of my way, and I'm not playing.

    最好給我閃開,我沒在開玩笑的。

  • I'ma back up and I'll do it.

    我真的會倒車!

  • You ain't backing up.

    妳才不敢倒車!

  • Which one is lift?

    到底哪個是舉起?

  • You ain't going nowhere.

    妳哪兒都不能去!

  • Oh!

    噢!

  • Bernice!

    Bernice!

  • Oh, my God!

    天啊!

  • Bernice!

    Bernice!

  • Oh, my God!

    天啊!

  • God damn, I told her I was gonna back up.

    靠,我就說我會倒車!

  • What did you do to Bernice?

    妳對 Bernice 做了什麼?

  • It was an accident.

    這是意外!

  • We gotta go.

    我們該走了。

  • We gotta go.

    我們該走了。

  • Bernice!

    Bernice!

  • Oh, my God.

    天啊!

  • Where are you going?

    妳們要去哪?

  • Get back here!

    給我回來!

  • You killed my friend!

    妳殺了我朋友!

  • I've never driven a tow truck before, but I can't let them get away.

    我從沒有開過拖車,但我不能讓她們逃走。

  • I've got you blocked in.

    我把你們擋在裡面了。

  • Call an ambulance right away.

    叫救護車,現在!

  • I'm going to check on my friend.

    我要去看看我朋友。

  • Bernice!

    Bernice!

  • I thought you were dead.

    我還以為妳死了。

  • I really could watch that 7,000 times.

    這個我看 7,000 次也不會膩。

  • So they're doing something right, because it made me want to watch it.

    所以他們一定做對了什麼,因為它讓我想要繼續看。

  • This next one is a British show called Naked Attraction.

    下一個是英劇,叫做 Naked Attraction。

  • Single people choose a date based on seeing someone from the head down naked.

    單身者挑選約會對象,看不到臉,但他們頭部以下全裸。

  • It's in Britain.

    這在英國。

  • It's completely uncensored, so you see everybody's crumpets.

    完全無碼,所以你可以看到他們的那邊。

  • And--

    而且...

  • We have got six colored pods.

    這裡有六個有顏色的艙。

  • Inside each and every one of them is a gorgeous young man, your Hollywood pinup, that is completely and utterly naked.

    每個艙裡面,都有一名年輕帥氣的男子,帥到你會黏在牆上欣賞的那種,而且他們完全裸體。

  • Natural, muscley arms.

    自然、有肌肉的手臂。

  • A man's arms is-- it goes a long way, it really does.

    男生的手很重要,真的。

  • I know you're slightly obsessed with Titanic.

    我知道妳很喜歡《鐵達尼號》。

  • Yeah.

    沒錯。

  • So we are going to recreate the scene in Titanic where Kate Winslet is like that and Leo has got his arms around her.

    所以,我們要來重現《鐵達尼號》的場景,也就是 Kate Winslet 做這個動作,而 Leo 用手環抱她的那幕。

  • So, anyone who could be your Jack?

    好的,誰可以當妳的 Jack?

  • Maybe be we should try it with orange.

    或許在橘色艙的那個。

  • OK, I'm going to move you this way.

    好的,我要把妳移到這裡。

  • Great.

    好。

  • Back into the pod.

    背部進到艙裡。

  • This is hilarious.

    這好好笑。

  • Arms out like you're flying.

    手臂伸出來,就像妳在飛翔。

  • In you go, orange.

    小橘,換你出場。

  • Jack, I'm flying.

    Jack,我在飛欸!

  • Michelle, how did that feel?

    Michelle,感覺如何?

  • I did get a little touch of his hands.

    我有感受到他手的觸感。

  • Nice, firm, manly hands, so that was nice.

    厚實、雄性的手,不錯。

  • Serious question-- are straight people OK?

    認真問一下,直男直女還好嗎?

  • I'm concerned.

    我為你們擔心。

  • Finally, there's a show somebody told me about called Extreme Love.

    最後,有人告訴我一部節目叫做 Extreme Love。

  • It's about unexpected relationships.

    它關於意外的戀愛關係。

  • And I know I always say, if I have to see it then you have to see it, too, but I'm not sure you're going to want to see it.

    我知道,我總是說,如果我得看,你們也得看,但我不確定你們想不想看。

  • So you can vote, OK?

    所以你們可以投票,好嗎?

  • You have to know a couple of things ahead of time.

    先讓你們知道一些事。

  • It's about a 31-year-old man dating a 91-year-old woman.

    是個 31 歲的男子跟 91 歲的女人約會。

  • Who wants to see it?

    誰想看?

  • OK.

    好。

  • All right.

    好吧!

  • There's open-mouth kissing.

    還有濕吻。

  • Still interested?

    還有興趣?

  • OK.

    好吧!

  • It ends in a hotel room.

    結尾在飯店房間結束。

  • Last chance.

    最後的機會喔!

  • OK.

    好吧!

  • You're all sick.

    你們都有病。

  • Here it is.

    給你們看吧!

  • I enjoy sex, NASCAR and crochet, and a drink, occasionally.

    我喜歡性愛、賽車跟編織,偶而喝點小酒。

  • My older son is 71, and the youngest will be 50 in September.

    我最大的兒子 71 歲,而最小的九月就 50 歲了。

  • The fact that Margie's kids are old enough to be Kyle's parents didn't put him off.

    Margie 的孩子已經老到可以當 Kyle 的父母,但這沒有讓他停下。

  • In fact, he was in hot pursuit of Marge from the moment they met.

    事實上,他從見到 Marge 的那一刻,就開始熱烈追求她。

  • And when he finally got her in bed, Kyle was in for a steamy night.

    當他們真的上床,Kyle 度過了一夜春宵。

  • When I did the first time, I told a girlfriend where I was going to be.

    當我跟他第一次上床,我告訴了一個女性朋友。

  • And then I called her when we were at the motel and said, guess who's tied up, and it's not me.

    然後在摩鐵的時候,我又打給她,說「猜猜誰被綁起來了,那人可不是我。」

  • And he's laying on the bed hollering, help!

    他就在床上大喊著救命。

  • Help!

    救命!

  • I am so, so sorry.

    我很抱歉。

  • You have no one to blame but the people who raised their hands.

    你們只能怪那些剛剛舉手的人。

Have a seat.

請坐。

字幕與單字
已審核 字幕已審核

影片操作 你可以在這邊進行「影片」的調整,以及「字幕」的顯示

B1 中級 中文 美國腔 TheEllenShow 實境 舉起 鐵達尼號 叫做 關掉

【艾倫秀】超狂「實境」節目! (You Won’t Believe These Really Real TV Shows)

  • 5835 194
    Mackenzie 發佈於 2020 年 01 月 26 日
影片單字