Obviously I'm team Taiwan.

很明顯地，我是臺灣隊。

And I'm repping team USA.

然後我代表美國隊。

Let me tell you something: America knows how to put some sugar in some snacks and make them taste good.

我告訴你，美國人很知道怎麼在零食點心裡加糖然後把它們變好吃。

Taiwanese snacks, it's better than any American snack.

臺灣零食比任何美國零食都好吃。

I believe it, honestly.

我相信，我真的相信。

Really, why?

真的嗎？為什麼？

- Well, first of all. - Why are we doing this video?

- 首先呢。 - 我們為什麼要拍這個影片？

I'm really excited to show you the stuff that I grew up with.

我超期待跟你分享我從小吃到大的東西。

I'm so excited.

我好興奮。

Rice Krispies Treats, they're so good.

米花糖超級好吃的。

As you open it you know that you may not feel your toes at the end of the day.

打開它的時候你就知到你最後可能會吃到腳麻掉。

It's worth it.

但一切都值得。

That is marshmallow and Rice Krispies.

這是棉花糖和爆米香。

These used to be much bigger by the way.

順帶一提，他們以前大很多。

I don't know if the FDA issued a warning.

我不知道是不是食藥署發佈了警告。

These suckers are called sachima.

這些傢伙叫做沙其馬。

Sachima.

沙其馬。

Sachima, I think the concept is the same.

我覺得沙其馬的概念是一樣的。

A snack that comes in a block form.

塊狀的零食。

It's deep fried noodles and then they bind it together with this delicious caramel glaze.

這是炸麵條，然後用美味的焦糖漿凝合在一起。

You got me at caramel.

你說到焦糖我就想吃了。

I used to have a ton of these as a kid.

我以前小時候吃超級多沙其馬。

Oh, whoa, they're huge!

哇！好大！

That one's giant. Look at this, see what I'm saying?

那個超大！你看！知道我在說什麼嗎？

Look at this, see what I'm saying? Look, this is half the size of this.

你看，它只有那個的一半大。

I think this is the only time the American portion is smaller than the international version.

我覺得這是唯一一次美國的份量比其他國家的份量小。

You eat a whole one of these?

你會吃掉整個沙其馬？

You can eat like five of these.

還可以吃掉五個。

Oh, I love the caramel!

噢，我超愛這個焦糖！

If you put powdered sugar on top of this, it would taste like a funnel cake.

如果在上面撒上糖粉，吃起來就會像漏斗蛋糕。

I could save this for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

我可以把著個留著當早餐、午餐和晚餐。

This is a journey.

這是個味蕾之旅。

It smells like vanilla ice cream.

聞起來像香草冰淇淋。

This is really good.

真的超好吃。

I don't remember so much marshmallow flavor.

我不記得它的棉花糖味這麼重。

It's not as sweet as I thought it was gonna be.

這沒像我想像的那麼甜。

This is getting a little bit too sweet for me.

這對我來說有點太甜了。

I'm going to just lay this here.

我要把它就放在這裡。

This is really good.

真的好好吃。

It's really sticky though, gets in the teeth.

但是有點黏，會卡牙縫。

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, it's super sticky.

對了，我忘記說沙其馬超黏牙的。

I would rather a dentist visit than on my death bed, so, this wins.

我寧願看牙醫也不要死在床上，所以沙其馬贏了。

Oh my gosh!

噢天啊！

They look so similar!

他們看起來好像！

We have the Koloko which is the pea crackers.

我們手上的是可樂果碗豆酥。

Made from peas; P-A - , P-E-A, peas, no...

豆子做的，P A，P E A，不是...

P-E-A - Not, no, not - P E A

噢，P E A，P E A。

They're just delicious.

超好吃。

This is one of my favorite snacks.

這是我最喜歡的零食之一。

Everybody knows that everybody has had it as a kid.

大家都知道每個人小時候一定都吃過。

Garlicky flavor, it's like an umami bomb in little chips.

大蒜的味道，就好像小碗豆酥裡的鮮味炸彈。

In USA, America we have Fritos flavored twists, honey barbecue.

我們美國有蜜香烤肉口味的 Fritos 捲酥。

I remember so vividly getting so excited to buy these.

我很清楚記得以前買這個都超興奮。

Growing up we used to do Frito pies, which we used to do chili and cheese.

從小到大我們會把這個加上辣椒和起司做成餡餅。

They're are so good, so delicious.

好好吃，好美味。

Sweet, tangy barbecue flavor with that twist and that crunch, you actually taste the flavors five hours after you eat them.

香甜撲鼻的烤肉口味和酥脆螺旋，吃完五小時之後還可以嘗到味道。

It smells good.

聞起來好香。

Look at the color difference.

看看它們的顏色差異。

I could actually eat this whole bag.

我真的可以吃掉一整袋。

This is very, very salty.

這真的非常非常鹹。

Ooh!

噢！

Mm.

嗯嗯。

This is a light, delicate, garlic flavor.

這個是淡淡、恰到好處的大蒜風味。

Comes in like moments later.

這過一陣子才會回味。

- It's really mellow. - It creeps on you.

- 味道不濃。 - 它的味道會悄悄爬上舌尖。

This one just punches you in the face.

這個味道整個就像直接賞你一拳。

I still love this.

我還是很愛吃。

Uppercuts you.

他直接給你一記上鉤拳。

It's really salty, but I can't stop eating it.

這真的很鹹，但我停不下來。

I don't know what America's done to me, but.

我不知道美國對我做了什麼，但就這樣了。

Yes pea crackers, who knew?!

好棒噢，碗豆酥，誰知道會這麼好吃？！

What if I'm Taiwanese now? Let me switch with you.

如果我現在是台灣人呢？來，我跟你交換。

What the hell, this is delicious.

什麼鬼，這也太美味。

I need a refresher.

我需要刷新一下。

I gotta give it, my country, man.

我必須說我的國家贏了。

I gotta give it to my country. I forgot how this bursts with flavor!

我的國家贏了，我都忘記這個有多香。

I think I would have to stick with that one.

我還是覺得那個比較好吃。

This is a lot more flavorful.

這個味道比較濃。

I think I have to agree.

我覺得我必須同意。

That's why I'm saving this so I can make me a chili pie later, okay.

這就是為什麼我要留著，這樣我等等就能做個餡餅，好嗎。

This beef jerky, this is like a childhood staple as well.

這個牛肉乾也是童年必需品。

Coming home from school, having your beef jerky.

從學校回到家，就是要吃牛肉乾。

The snack that you would take like camping.

這是露營什麼的會帶的零食。

So this is also beef jerky, also my childhood favorite.

這也是牛肉乾，也是我小時候最喜歡的。

Juicy and tender and it's like all kinds of amazing.

多汁又軟嫩，真的是各種美妙。

In Taiwan you would see stalls and they would literally be grilling the jerky.

在臺灣可以看到小攤子真的在靠肉乾。

- So you saw it up close and personal. - We saw it.

- 所以你真的有近距離親眼看過。 - 我們有看到。

You know how your meals getting made.

你們都知道自己的食物是怎麼來的。

Every time I go to Taiwan I honestly just want to bring a suitcase of pork jerky back, but US customs won't let me.

我每次去臺灣老實說都想帶一整個行李箱的豬肉乾回來，但美國海關不準。

Look at that packaging.

看看那個包裝。

I feel like gold is inside of this.

感覺好像裡面裝著黃金。

Look at this, just take it okay?

再看看個，拿走好嗎？

Just take the jerky.

把肉乾拿走。

Take the damn jerky and leave.

把該死的肉乾拿走然後出去。

Swap!

交換！

I'm gonna open my golden ticket!

我要來打開我的金獎券！

Smells like liquid smoke.

聞起來像煙燻液。

It's like smoke, pfft.

就像煙一樣，噗。

What the heck?

搞什麼？

This is a large piece of meat!

這塊肉超大！

You can feed your family for a week.

這可以餵飽你整家整整一星期。

This is one piece.

這樣是一片。

Ooh, that smells so good!

噢，聞起來超讚！

I feel like this was freshly made.

這感覺好像新鮮現做的。

I feel like they just sent it here like an hour ago.

感覺好像一小時前才被送來這裡。

The color's so different.

顏色好不一樣。

Okay, wow, that is not a color.

哇！好的，顏色不該是那樣。

What cow you know's out here walking around like this?

你知道有牛長那樣的嗎？

You can see it's like softer.

可見這個比較嫩。

This, it's like, it's not...it's not moving.

而這個根本沒在動。

This texture is a little artificial.

這個口感有點人工。

I still like these.

我還是蠻喜歡的。

That is what I think of when I think of beef, just a lot of salt, a lot of, a lot of smoky.

那就是我想到牛肉乾會想到的東西，很多鹽巴和很濃的煙燻味。

And a lot and a lot of salt.

真的很多很多鹽巴。

This actually tastes really good.

這吃起來其實真的很好吃。

Man, America, what we doing?

天啊美國，我們在幹嘛？

What are we doing?

我們在幹嘛？

I know it sounds like I'm not rocking with my country, but how can you blame me when you've got textured, tender jerky?!

我知道這聽起來很像我不愛國，但有這個口感鮮嫩的肉乾，但有這個口感鮮嫩的肉乾，怎麼能怪我？！

I will always go with our beef jerky.

我永遠都會選我們的肉乾。

It's the best.

它是最棒的。

No, don't disrespect my beef jerky!

不，不要不尊重我的肉乾！

I have pineapple cakes which are our specialty.

我手上的是鳳梨酥，我們的特產。

National treasure of Taiwan.

臺灣的國寶。

This is what we gift friends.

這是我們會送朋友的禮物。

It's essentially shortbread on the outside and pineapple/winter melon jam on the inside.

這基本上是奶酥餅包著鳳梨/冬瓜果醬。

So good!

超讚！

On the American side we have Fig Newtons!

美國這邊派出的是 Fig Newtons！

Oh my goodness, I grew up with these like every day in my household.

我的天啊！我從小到大每天在家都吃這個。

Fat free?

零脂肪？

Nuh uh, no, I never ate the fat-free ones.

不不不，我從來都不吃靈脂肪的。

It sounds very similar.

聽起來很像。

An outside kind of cakey layer with inside jam.

酥餅外皮然後包著果醬。

I love Fig Newtons.

我愛 Fig Newton。

Smells, good.

聞起來不錯。

Made with real fruits.

真的水果製成。

Cute packaging!

包裝好可愛！

It says good.

上面寫說棒棒棒棒棒。

Just in case you needed to know how good it was.

怕你需要知道它多讚。

Grab and go, oops sorry.

拿了就走，喔噢抱歉。

You haven't even tried it, you're already trying to throw it away!

你根本還沒試吃就要把它丟掉！

Oh, snap!

噢，酷！

Oh, the smell just comes out and it's just so rich with pineapple.

噢，味道直接冒出來，充滿濃濃的鳳梨味。

Ooh, they're almost the same size!

噢，他們幾乎一樣大！

They are almost the same size.

他們幾乎一樣大！

Nice.

很棒。

It smells very pineapple-y.

聞起來很鳳梨味。

Okay, Taiwan.

好的，臺灣。

What if I, I'm going to Taiwan this year.

如果說，我今年要去臺灣。

I really like the fig jam and the breading ratio.

我很喜歡無花果醬和麵包粉的比例。

The flavor is a little more sophisticated.

這個味道有點比較老成。

But I like it.

但我喜歡。

These are super similar.

他們超級像。

The cake is very buttery.

這酥餅的奶油味很濃。

- Refresher course. - Yeah, I need a refresher.

- 刷新時間。- 對，我需要刷新一下。

Fig, it tastes like home.

無花果嚐起來有家的味道。

No high fructose corn syrup, so she wins.

不含高果糖玉米糖漿，所以它贏了。

She wins.

Fig Newton 贏了。

Agree to disagree.

接受但不認同。

Is yours made with real fruit?

你的鳳梨酥是用真的水果做的嗎？

Real pineapple!

真的鳳梨！

Agree to disagree.

接受但不認同。

So pineapple cake wins?

所以鳳梨酥贏了嗎？

Yeah, I think pineapple cake wins in this case.

對，我覺得鳳梨酥贏了這回合。

Yay!

耶！

Sorry Mr. Newton.

Newton 先生抱歉了。

Sorry Mr. Newton!

Newton 先生抱歉了。

Sorry, not sorry.

抱歉，但其實不抱歉。

That's good!

很棒！

Goldfish weren't really my thing, Cheez-Its were.

我以前不太喜歡 Goldfish 餅乾，我喜歡 Cheez-It。

But you know what, as I've gotten older, I've actually kind of grown to like them.

但是隨著我年紀增長，我其實越來越喜歡了。

One time I ate a whole bag of these and then I vomited in the back of my mom's van when I was a kid, 'cause I love them so much!

我小時候有一次吃了一整袋後在我媽的廂型車後座嘔吐，因為我真的太愛吃 Goldfish 了。

And you still love them?

你現在還愛吃嗎？

I love them so much.

我超愛！

This says it's made with smiles.

這上面寫說是用笑容做成的。

Aw!

噢！

I have squid chips.

我手上的是魷魚脆片。

It says (speaking in foreign language)

它上面寫著真魷味。

It just mean very squid flavor.

意思就指是魷魚味很濃。

Which I know sounds bizarre.

我知道聽起來很怪。

I've had this a lot as a kid.

我小時候吃很多真魷味。

If you bring us to the supermarket, the grocery store, we'd be like, this is the one.

要是以前帶我們去超市，我們就會選定要吃這個。

Just seeing the packaging it's like very nostalgic.

看到這個包裝就讓我好懷念。

OMG, the flavor whiplashes you first and foremost.

天啊，味道馬上往臉上衝。

Oh my god, this is so cool!

我的天啊，好酷噢！

Look at how cute this is.

看看這多可愛。

Look at how adorable.

看看多可愛。

Like I'm gonna do a little ring action, okay, hello!

我要來戴戒指，哈囉！

I'm just really intrigued by the concept of a squid chip.

這個魷魚脆片的概念真的很有趣。

There she is!

看看它。

Right, well, it's just really subtle squid flavor.

對，微妙的魷魚味。

The squid is loving this.

這隻魷魚超愛真魷味。

The squid is like, I gotcha.

它說：「我罩你。」

Welcome to Taiwan.

歡迎來到臺灣。

The thing that made you vomit.

這就是讓你嘔吐的東西。

Stop!

別說了！

It's better to get quantity.

一次吃很多比較好吃。

I like the goldfish, who wouldn't like it?

大家都喜歡金魚，誰不喜歡呢？

It's cheesy.

起司味很濃。

I think I didn't like when I was little 'cause I like my cheddar to hit me in the face.

我記得我小時候不太喜歡，因為我喜歡濃到像是直接往我臉上揍的起司味。

Ooh.

噢。

The cheese is very subtle.

這個起司味淡淡的。

I could see myself snacking on this, just like...

我能想像我狂吃這個當零食，就像這樣。

This complements it so well.

這個讓它變超好吃。

Oh, the combination!

噢，兩個加起來！

I'm gonna give this a tie. Can I do that?

我決定這局平手，可以這麼做嗎？

Right there!

就這樣！

Right there!

就這樣！

We can't let a fish and a squid fight. They can't beef!

我們不能讓魚和魷魚打架，它們不能吵架！

They are one and the same!

它們都是一家人！

A snack is a snack, and I'm a snack fan.

零食就是零食，然後我喜歡吃零食。

I think we need to get our blood pressure checked now, man, 'cause I don't know how we're doing.

我覺得我們要去量血壓，因為我不知道我們在幹嘛。

We just had sodium, sugar, it was lit.

我們吃了超多鹽分糖分，酷爆了。

Yes.

對。

Ready for bed actually.

其實我準備好要上床睡覺了。

Yeah, same, I wanna take a nap now.

我也是，我現在小要小睡一下。

When are you coming to Taiwan?

你什麼時候要來臺灣？

I really wanna come to Taiwan, and I want Inga to take me and show me around.

我很想要去臺灣然後讓 Inga 帶我出去玩。

Let's do it!

來吧！