中級 美國腔 107 分類 收藏
開始影片後,點擊或框選字幕可以立即查詢單字
字庫載入中…
回報字幕錯誤
Let's kick it off with a story everyone is talking about.
Game of Thrones.
Last night was the big series finale,
and I'm not gonna spoil anything--
(clears throat) Iron Man dies-- but let's just say,
some people are taking the ending hard.
TV REPORTER: It has been eight long,
and at times, very frustrating, seasons
for Game of Thrones fans, and now that the end has come,
you might need someone to talk to.
Yeah, Bark.com is offering therapy sessions for viewers
whether you need someone to complain to
about these plot holes some people have been talking about,
have trouble with the ending, or just need help
in the absence of your favorite show,
the site promises to find a professional for you.
Yes, that's right, a website is offering therapy,
therapy sessions for people upset
about the ending of Game of Thrones.
And let me just say, people, uh, if you need therapy
because a TV show ended, your life is too good, okay?
I'm just gonna tell you straight,
you don't need a therapist, you need some credit card debt,
and an STD, okay.
Take your mind right off that series finale.
(cheering and applause)
And I hope...
I also hope those therapy sessions are private, right,
because you're gonna look like a dick if you're in
a group therapy session and the person before you will be like,
"I got addicted to drugs after my wife left."
And you go like, "Okay, put a pin in that.
"I didn't like Jon Snow's story arc, okay?
I didn't like it."
In other news, it's the season finale of college,
and one graduation ceremony had a surprise ending
that most people actually enjoyed.
Billionaire Robert Smith surprised graduating seniors
at Morehouse college by telling them his family would wipe out
all their student debt.
That's an estimated $40 million for nearly 400 students.
And my family is making a grant
to eliminate their student loans.
(crowd cheering)
Wow!
He's gonna pay off 400 kids' student debt.
$40 million. That is really amazing.
Although, I will say, I do feel bad for that one kid
who worked his way through school
so that he wouldn't have loans.
Yeah, because you know he was at that ceremony like,
"You guys wasted all your time partying,
"but some of us scrubbed toilets for years to be debt-free.
And now, I'm gonna be-- Wait. What?"
(laughter)
Seriously, it sucks for that guy.
It's like going to a group dinner,
all your friends are ordering caviar,
you think you're paying for yourself, so you're like,
"I'm just gonna have the breadsticks," and at the end,
someone's like, "The dinner was on me."
And you're like... (cracking sound)
(laughter)
And also, and also, can we admit
that although this was fantastic,
this billionaire has ruined commencement speeches forever?
Yeah, because good luck being next year's speaker.
It'll be like, "And, finally, I want to say,
always follow your dreams."
"And...?"
"And believe in yourself."
"And...?"
"Well, that's it."
"Boo."
(laughter)
This also probably pisses off other billionaires,
when, you think about it, because now the expectation
is that they will pay tuition at any college they go to.
You're gonna look bad if you don't.
Yeah, I bet other billionaires
are gonna end up speaking at cheaper colleges, you know.
Bill Gates will be like, "It's such an honor to be addressing
"the Hackensack Online Beauty Academy.
"Here's your 150, here's your 150 bucks.
Here's your 150 bucks."
All right, moving on to some tech news.
Now that Uber is a public company,
it's under more pressure to make profits,
which is probably why it just launched a brand-new feature.
If your Uber driver is a bit too chatty for your liking,
you can now use a mute feature in Uber Black service.
Now, the features in the app are called "quiet preferred,"
but if you're feeling social,
you can also select "happy to chat."
Yes, from now on if you get into an Uber,
you can select "happy to chat" or "quiet mode" on the app.
Although, I'll be honest, knowing Uber drivers,
I don't think it's actually gonna make a difference, right?
You're gonna get in the car
and then the driver's gonna be like,
"So I see you chose 'quiet mode,' yeah?
"That's a good option, yeah.
"So many drivers, they talk, talk, talk, talk.
"Never leave you alone.
"Yeah, I wish everything in life had quiet mode,
"like my children and my wife.
"Oh, yeah. No. I mean, yeah.
So is this your first time using 'quiet mode,' yeah?"
(laughter)
But don't forget, don't forget, you only get "quiet mode"
if you take Uber Black, which is the luxury service.
Yeah, luckily, though, Uber has also unveiled
some new features for UberX, like there,
they've got a new mode called "Don't stab me."
Yeah, so that's a... that's a nice feature.
And finally, some news coming out of my home country,
South Africa.
We move on now to a bizarre encounter
with a fan for Arnold Schwarzenegger.
The action star and former governor
has decided not to press charges against the man
who drop-kicked him in the back at an event in South Africa.
NEWSWOMAN: This weekend,
71-year-old Arnold Schwarzenegger proving
it's still a bad idea to mess with the Governator.
One man at the Arnold Classic Africa Sports Festival
in South Africa learned that the hard way
after landing a flying kick into Schwarzenegger's back.
In this video, you see despite the attacker
taking a running start,
Arnold barely moved, unfazed.
(laughter)
What the (bleep)?
(laughter)
I know this was funny for some people,
but I'm not gonna lie. As a South African,
I was super pissed off.
First of all, thanks to that guy,
now we're the country
that drop-kicked the Terminator, okay?
And what's even worse is that Arnold barely even moved,
so now we look like we can't even kick right.
Makes the whole country look bad.
You know that people were texting me
after this shit happened?
People were like, "Hey, Trevor, did you see this kick?
Is that a normal thing in South Africa?"
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, guys. No, it's tradition.
That's what we do in South Africa.
We just drop-kick all the celebrities that show up.
Yeah. Yeah, you remember when Bill Clinton
came to South Africa, Nelson Mandela met him
with a dropkick. He was like, "Welcome to South Africa.
Welcome."
提示:點選文章或是影片下面的字幕單字,可以直接快速翻譯喔!

載入中…

每日秀1 (Therapy for Game of Thrones Fans)

107 分類 收藏
Tony Li 發佈於 2019 年 9 月 9 日
看更多推薦影片
  1. 1. 單字查詢

    在字幕上選取單字即可即時查詢單字喔!

  2. 2. 單句重複播放

    可重複聽取一句單句,加強聽力!

  3. 3. 使用快速鍵

    使用影片快速鍵,讓學習更有效率!

  4. 4. 關閉語言字幕

    進階版練習可關閉字幕純聽英文哦!

  5. 5. 內嵌播放器

    可以將英文字幕學習播放器內嵌到部落格等地方喔

  6. 6. 展開播放器

    可隱藏右方全文及字典欄位,觀看影片更舒適!

  1. 英文聽力測驗

    挑戰字幕英文聽力測驗!

  1. 點擊展開筆記本讓你看的更舒服

  1. UrbanDictionary 俚語字典整合查詢。一般字典查詢不到你滿意的解譯,不妨使用「俚語字典」,或許會讓你有滿意的答案喔