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  • So she pulls out like a 20 or something like that out of her pocket.

  • Oh no.

  • Rolls that boy up, pops open the bag, leans the chair back, right, and just, (snort), in my car!

  • So it's two AM, the drunk hour, when the magic phrase last call drives the inebriated into the streets.

  • I pick up this couple, it was obviously a date, the girl had like flowers, the guy was completely drunk.

  • We get to the location, she says, okay, we gotta get him out so you can take me home.

  • He said, "I'm not leaving you! I'm nah nah nah nah."

  • She says okay I will take him out to the curb, then I'll get back into the car.

  • And does that, before she could close the door, he jumps into the back seat.

  • "No! I'm no leaving you nah!"

  • So she gets out trying to coax him out, and I said, sir, you really have to leave the car.

  • And then he changed.

  • What are you talking about?

  • He gets out, and he gets into the divers side, and he starts throwing punches.

  • Raining blows on my head, rapid fire.

  • Are you serious?

  • I am completely serious.

  • I'm sitting there holding up my arms, trying to deflect it.

  • And I get ahold of his wrists, then he's giving me the death stare trying to throw punches.

  • He gets out, goes around, opens up the drivers side door, to try and get a better shot at me, and I end up just driving off.

  • Were the doors open?

  • Yeah the doors open.

  • What the hell!

  • I drive down a couple blocks and then I start writing to the app, saying this guy made me feel unsafe.

  • He caught up to where I was and starts beating on the drivers side window.

  • What?

  • I try to drive away, he's trying to get in, he's trying to, he's like trying to confront a car.

  • Wha wha what are you gonna do?

  • I drive past him.

  • Drive down a lot longer, maybe a mile or so.

  • I finish up driving, and then I notice he left his phone in the car.

  • I did not go back, I kept that thing.

  • I took it to the Hub where they have the real people there.

  • Went to them I filled out the form.

  • Here's this guys phone, this is this ride, you guys can deal with returning it to him.

  • I don't wanna see this guy again.

  • And I don't know what they did, they said they maybe temporarily banned him.

  • But they said as far as anything further, we'll take the appropriate action.

  • So I don't know what happened.

  • It was maybe about 2:30 at night, 3:00, when the bars were all out.

  • And I'm trying to find this guy when all of a sudden I hear like a whistle, so he sits in the back.

  • He's cool, like he's this British rocker.

  • You know we're talking, we're putting on some really good music and we're just jamming out, and I can kinda smell that he like smokes, which is kinda like my pick up line, like oh do you wanna have a cigarette, and he goes yeah.

  • So we decide to have a cigarette, but he said let me sit in the front, and I said yeah totally.

  • The mood is great, and then all of a sudden he starts rubbing on my leg, and I was like whoa.

  • Like the thing is I was into it too, so I started rubbing on his leg, and...

  • And so we just stopped the car.

  • And the thing is, you know, we start kissing, and it gets hot and heavy, he whips out his junk.

  • And so, yeah, I was playing with his junk, whatever.

  • And he's British, so you know what that means, he's uncircumcised, no I know, I know.

  • So the thing is that...

  • While the clock was on?

  • Well, of course I'm gonna charge for that shit.

  • We get hot and heavy, and the thing is that he wanted to fuck me, he says like I want to fuck you.

  • And I was thinking like, wow, I usually I mean, after like the first 30 minutes, usually it's like an hour in the night.

  • I'm not that easy, and we don't have protection.

  • I'm, this guys nuts, so I was like well this is a little bit much.

  • Maybe we go back to my place.

  • And he's all no no we can't go back to your place.

  • And I said, I don't think it's gonna happen.

  • We didn't finish from there or anything.

  • I dropped him off and like when I see him,

  • he's still jerking off.

  • Like, he really wanted it because he was that drunk.

  • - How many stars did he give you?

  • - Five stars of course.

  • - It was rush hour, so it was like five, six o'clock.

  • I get a request from this girl off the UCLA campus.

  • And so I pull up, and I see this girl walking towards me,

  • and she looked like she just got outta bed.

  • So she walks over and she looks like she's just tired.

  • She comes up to the window and she's like,

  • hi are you Eddie?

  • And I'm like yeah, she goes hi,

  • and she gets in the front seat,

  • which already I'm like, oh my god.

  • So she gets in the front seat,

  • she goes, we're going to the corner

  • of Franklin and Whitley in Hollywood.

  • And I go alright.

  • She goes, how long will that take?

  • And I was like well, it's rush hour now,

  • so I don't know, 45 minutes to an hour.

  • She goes (sigh) he owes me jesus.

  • And I was like, are you okay?

  • She goes that's fine.

  • We're driving, we start talking about

  • boyfriends and girlfriends, dating, all of a sudden

  • she comes on the topic of drugs.

  • And she goes, have you ever done drugs before,

  • and I said well no I haven't.

  • So then she goes, oh well just so you know,

  • we're gonna pick up drugs.

  • - Oh god.

  • - And I go oh.

  • (laughs) I go oh.

  • So we're going to pick up drugs.

  • We're driving along, we get to Hollywood,

  • Franklin and Whitley, we're at the corner.

  • This guy she's texting has not responded yet.

  • We're just sitting there on Whitley, just kinda like,

  • so what's, what are we, what's next?

  • So what do we do next.

  • Finally the guy responds.

  • Blue Nissan, northwest corner,

  • I'm like alright that sounds shady.

  • So she goes, okay wait here.

  • And I wait there, and she goes back out.

  • I waited for probably like 10 minutes.

  • So she gets back in the car, take me back home.

  • Driving along, and she pulls out two like dime bags

  • from her bra, and she goes okay do you have any paper?

  • And I was like no all I have is like a wrapper.

  • And she goes okay alright fine,

  • so she pulls out like a 20 or something like that

  • out of her pocket, rolls that boy up,

  • pops open the bag, leans the chair back, right,

  • and just (snort) in my car!

  • And I was like, like what?

  • I was like yo!

  • So she hits and she goes, ah, okay.

  • (laughs)

  • Now I can go to work.

  • I was like what do you do for a living?

  • (laughs)

  • I was like what you can get high before you leave?

  • (laughs) Oh my god dude.

  • So I drive her back, drop her off,

  • she leaves the car, and that was it.

  • - People are crazy, California's crazy, expect it.

  • Hope for the best expect the worst.

  • Guard your loins people.

  • (upbeat music)

So she pulls out like a 20 or something like that out of her pocket.

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A2 初級 美國腔

乘車共享司機講述他們最瘋狂的故事 (Ride Share Drivers Tell Their Craziest Stories)

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    Emily 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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