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  • (audience applauding)

  • Yeah, all right, yeah, all right, yeah.

  • I feel the enthusiasm right of the top, yeah.

  • We are, yeah, New York, New York, New York.

  • (audience applauding) That's, that's where we at.

  • New York, yeah, New York.

  • Yeah, everywhere, yeah.

  • You got to keep your hands in your pocket

  • in New Yorks, yes, ya'll are busier around here, man.

  • A lotta, lotta walkin', lotta walkin',

  • and I like it 'cause y'all got a lot of good crosswalks,

  • the countdown crosswalks, yeah,

  • I like those things right there.

  • Let me know how long I got

  • to get across the street, yeah.

  • 'Cause I wasn't raised on the countdowns.

  • I just had the man and the hand,

  • and ah, yeah. audience laughs)

  • 'Cause you don't know, you don't know when

  • the man or the hand gonna come up,

  • you just out there taking a chance

  • with the man and the hand. (audience laughs)

  • Like man, that hand came up fast as hell right there.

  • Let me, let me get on out the street

  • But here, you see the countdown, let ya know.

  • Like I look up sometime and like man,

  • I got 34 more seconds!

  • (audience laughs) You know, I can,

  • I can walk back and forthin 34 seconds, man.

  • Say "Why you still in the street?"

  • 'Cause I got time! (laughter)

  • That's why I'm still in the street.

  • But yeah, man, but that's a beautiful and diversity, man.

  • That's what we gotta have, but diversity,

  • I like it 'casue it's diverse, yeah.

  • Don't let the noise get to us.

  • Don't, don't, yeah, don't, don't, don't, don't,

  • don't build no wall.

  • Build a bridge to somebody, yeah.

  • (audience cheers loudly) Yeah, let somebody...

  • Yeah, let's, let's bring the people in, man.

  • 'Cause I know we under new management as a yeah,

  • we under new management.

  • It's like your favorite restaurant, and you went to,

  • ike man, them people don't own this store no more?

  • So ah. (wheeze)

  • Yeah, so that's what we did in a way,

  • "You know like this, this don't taste like it used

  • (audience laughs) "to when other people had it."

  • That's all it is, is a different flavor.

  • THat's all it is, 'cause you know,

  • there's different seasoning, that's all

  • that's going on with the whole Trump movement,

  • it's just different seasoning.

  • I knew he was going wrong, 'cause it's all about seasoning,

  • what you put in your food and ah, like in the cabinet.

  • I was watching the cabinet selection.

  • He started off wrong with the seasoning,

  • (laughter) 'cause...

  • Yeah, 'cause I come to your house and look at your cabinet,

  • that let me know, you know, how you gonna,

  • what kinda flavor you're putting in your greens.

  • I need to know.

  • And I was watching the selection, I was like man,

  • that's a, that's a lotta salt right there.

  • (uproarious laughter) That's a lotta salt.

  • Yeah, that's a lot of,

  • (energetic applausr) lot of, lot of salt.

  • I said, you can't, you can't make any good greens

  • with all that salt right there,

  • we gonna have high blood pressure right there.

  • (audience laughs)

  • And people say, "Oh, what about Ben Carson,

  • "that's a different seasoning."

  • I say naw, that's accent right there, that's just accent.

  • That's not black pepper, that's substitute salt.

  • (audience laughs and applauds)

  • (wheezes) (ovation)

  • Take your time, take your time, take your time.

  • So yeah, man, I just, you know I say go,

  • you know, go be around other people.

  • Go to different places sometime where you may not go.

  • Don't just stay in your neighborhood.

  • Go see what other people are doing.

  • Like I go to the city sometime, and I just pop up in places.

  • Like I like to go through the mall sometimes

  • just to see what people are doing at the mall.

  • What they, you know, selling at their little kioskses,

  • and that's a new word right there, Kiosk.

  • (audience giggles) You know, nobody was raised

  • on the word kiosk, that just

  • came out of nowhere right there.

  • Yeah, 'cause I didn't call them kiosks,

  • I used to call them little stands,

  • what's what I thought they was.

  • People say, "Where you get that from?"

  • "That little stand over there,

  • (laughter) that's where I bought that"

  • Yeah, I've never said "at the kiosk over there", but ah.

  • I'm a big fan of the food court at the mall,

  • 'cause I like samples.

  • I love a, yeah, a sample.

  • If you got something on a toothpick,

  • I need to know what the hell going on, on that toothpick.

  • I love the Asian people, I love the Asians,

  • 'cause y'all always have a sample an it's, and it's yeah,

  • it's always a shiny piece of meat,

  • (laughter) it's always just...

  • Just so shiny!

  • Man, I said, man.

  • And they, "Sample, sample?"

  • Yes, I would like a piece of that shiny meat, who don't.

  • I can't turn down no shiny meat.

  • And I understand what a sample is.

  • That's just, you know, that's just a suggestive sale.

  • They're saying "if you like this shiny meat,

  • there's more shiny meat to purchase.

  • (laughter) And sometime I get

  • the taste in my mouth, I say,

  • "Man, I think I want some more shiny meat."

  • And they're so nice, I go over

  • and order it from the counter, and she says,

  • "Sir, would you like rice to chow mein in the,"

  • I always go with the rice 'cause I still

  • really don't know what chow mein is.

  • (laughter)

  • Yeah, I don't know who the chow or the mein, I don't know.

  • I wasn't raised on that kind of spaghetti.

  • (laughter)

  • Yeah, I said, don't put them peas in there,

  • I don't want them peas.

  • Yeah, I don't really eat baby carrots in my spaghetti.

  • But ah, yeah, but beautiful, beautiful people,

  • and they're look, so you just gotta get

  • to know people every once in a while.

  • And they, I get the rice and they're so nice with the rice.

  • Yeah, the lady just kept giving me rice.

  • Just giving me rice.

  • And I said "Ma'am, I just want some rice for today."

  • (laughter)

  • Yeah, I said, "I don't have that much shiny meat

  • for all this rice right here."

  • So that's, yeah, I had a lotta,

  • I had like a 60 pound bag of rice!

  • I said, "I gotta find

  • a little small village to drop this rice on."

  • I been right, man, man,

  • I appreciate the love and enthusiasm here.

  • (ovation)

  • Much love, man, thank you very much, thank you!

(audience applauding)

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A2 初級 美國腔

羅德曼將美國比作新管理層下的餐廳CONAN on TBS (Rod Man Compares America To A Restaurant Under New Management CONAN on TBS)

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    陳冠廷 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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