It throws off your judgement and soon you're overwhelmed with just wanting to be with that person again.

這會影響到你的判斷能力，讓你在不久之後只會一直想跟他在一起。

While people often say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, it instead allows feelings of being miserable and empty to grow instead.

雖然人們都說久別情更深，但實際上反而會讓人感到沮喪、空虛。

Before deciding to get back together with your ex, watch this video for reasons about why you shouldn't.

當你決定吃回頭草之前，先來看看這部影片，讓你知道為什麼不該這麼做。

After you've been separated from someone, there's a tendency to romanticize the past, meaning that you focus only on the good things that happened and ignore all the bad.

當你和某人分手後，你會傾向美化過去，意思是你只會專注在過去的美好而忽略所有的壞事。

By blocking out all the reasons why you two didn't work out, you're recreating a false image of that person.

當你排除了為什麼分手的原因，你其實也為那個人刻畫了一個不切實際的想像。

You're remembering somebody who didn't really exist.

你其實是在緬懷一個不存在的人。

When you remember only the good, you no longer miss your ex and instead miss the idea of them.

當你只記得美好的事物，你其實不是思念你的前男女朋友，而是對他們的想像。

For example say you just broke up with "Person A."

比方說，如果你剛和 A 分手。

You start to miss them and think of all the good times you had together, ignoring all the times you and "Person A" fought or argued.

你會開始想念他，懷念過去一起經歷過的美好，同時忽略和 A 吵架的時候。

You focus so much on all the good things about person A that you've created a whole new person: "Person B".

你過度專注於 A 的優點，以致於創造出了一個新的角色：B。

You don't really miss Person A because you miss Person B, who sadly is only an idea.

你想念的不是 A 而是 B，但很遺憾的，這個人並不存在。

Instead of blocking out the bad things that happened, focus on them so you can learn.

與其隔絕過去發生的種種壞事，應該專注在這些事上，這樣你才會有所成長。

Learn what personality traits you want to look for, and what traits you want to stay away from.

了解潛在對象該有哪些性格，而哪些性格則是你想避免的。

Let yourself grow and move on.

讓自己成長，然後對過去選擇放手。

Breaking up is a drastic change and no one likes change.

分手是一項很大的改變，而沒有人喜歡改變。

It's natural to crave familiarity, so we often go back to whatever we just lost whether it was healthy or not.

對熟悉感的嚮往是自然的，所以我們常常想回到過去，無論這在心理上健康與否。

You aren't used to being alone or dealing with the loud thoughts in your head.

你不習慣獨處，或自己一個人處理心中的話語。

You're used to having Person A to talk to, so not having them around is frustrating and leaves you with a sense of emptiness.

你習慣有 A 可以談心，所以當他不在身邊會讓你感到心煩意亂和空虛。

It was comforting having Person A around to talk to. Why would you want to keep them away?

可以和 A 一起聊天很棒。為什麼要避開他呢？

However, while familiarity is comforting, you must remember that familiarity isn't always the healthiest choice.

然而，雖然熟悉感讓人心安，你必須記得你所熟悉的事物不見得就是對你而言最好的。

Sometimes, you need to step out of your comfort zone to be happy.

有時候你必須踏出舒適圈才會快樂。

Coupled with familiarity, after a breakup you end up yearning for closeness.

和熟悉感連帶的是，分手後你渴望親密感。

Being close with someone is a special feeling, one that often leaves you feeling empty once gone.

和某人親近是很特別的感覺，那一旦消失後通常會讓你感到空虛。

You miss knowing the other person inside and out, and them knowing you as well.

你很懷念能完全了解對方，而對方也同樣了解你。

However, remember that being close to someone isn't restricted to that specific person, and being close in general doesn't necessarily create happiness.

然而你要記得，你不只是能夠親近這個特定的人，而和某人親近也不見得會帶來喜悅。

Instead of focusing on the crave for companionship, focus on yourself, and how you can be happy being on your own.

與其專注在你如何希望有人陪伴，你應該專注於自己，以及如何獨自感到快樂。

You both have changed since you first started going out.

你們不再是剛在一起的時候的那個樣子了。

Your experiences together have shaped who you've become, and you are no longer the same people you once were.

你們共同的你們共同的經驗塑造了你們今天的樣子，而你們也不再和過去相同了。

As you grew as people, you also grew apart.

當你們一起成長，你們也漸行漸遠。

You could no longer change together, so you had to make the ultimate change and break up.

你們無法再一起改變了，所以必須做出最大的改變，也就是分手。

Change is never fun and it can be tempting to avoid it altogether, but stopping yourself from growing is not the solution.

改變是痛苦的，而想避免這種痛苦確實誘人，但終止自己成長並不是一個好的辦法。

You should continue to help yourself grow. In that process you will find people who can grow alongside you.

你必須持續幫助自己成長。在這個過程中你會找到可以一起和你成長的人。

After pouring all your love, energy, and hard work into a person, it can feel like they owe you love.

對某人投入了感情和精力後，你會覺得對方對你有所虧欠。

But beating a dead horse won't do you any good.

但做徒勞無功的事對你也沒有好處。

You can never force somebody to love you, no matter how much you try.

無論你多麼努力，都沒辦法強迫別人愛你。

Human nature has us naturally rebel against force, as we don't like being told to do things.

人的本性會自然地反抗外在的壓力，因為我們不喜歡被指揮應該做什麼。

This especially applies to love in relationships. Forcing someone to love you doesn't make them love you.

在感情中尤其是如此。強迫別人愛你不會讓他們愛上你。

In the end, they may resent you, creating a larger gap between you than there was before.

最後他們可能會怨恨你，反而更加深了你們之間的隔閡。

Don't try to force love and you'll end up being happier.

當你不強求感情時，便能更加快樂。

Compatibility is key in a relationship, and when it's gone, there is little hope for success.

契合度是感情成功的關鍵，而當這個條件消失後，感情成功的機會就變得微乎其微。

When revealing yourself in a new relationship, this is when compatibility is tested and often fails.

當你在一段新的感情開始露出真面目時，你們的契合度就會受到考驗，而通常不會過關。

As you learn more about each other, your true colors shine and you discover whether it's meant to last or not.

隨著你們更加了解對方後，兩人會漸漸流露出本性，然後你便能發現你們的關係究竟能否長久。

After a breakup, as more time progresses, it'll be easier to look back and see how you two were incompatible and are much better being separated.

分手之後，隨著時間的經過，就會更容易看出為什麼你們不適合在一起，而為何分手是更好的選擇。

It can be hard to see it in a heat of the moment.

在熱戀中是很難看清這些的。

But remember that it'll pass, and you'll be happier being on your own.

但記得這些痛苦都會結束，你單獨一人也會更快樂。

While it may seem hard to see, someone else will come along and be a much better match for you.

雖然你現在很難想像，但將來會有更適合的人出現在你的生命中。

You will have learned from your mistakes from your ex so you know what to look for in your new partner, and you will be able to spot warning signs before they get out of hand.

你會從你的前男女朋友知道哪裡出了錯，如此一來你會知道你希望下一個對象要如何，你也能夠在事情一發不可收拾前發現有哪裡不對勁。

You will have grown as a person from your last relationship, able to handle different things.

你會因為你的上一段感情而有所成長、能夠承擔更多。

You will be able to lead a new life and a new relationship, staying on safe and healthy waters.

你也能夠更妥善的經營一段新的人生和感情。

Don't give up on love. It's out there, and you'll find it when you're ready.

別放棄愛情。它是存在的，當你準備好時就會找到。

Remember that it's healthier to let go than to hold on to a love that isn't there anymore.

記得，放手比緊緊抱住不再存在的愛更好。

That's all from us, it's Psych2Go. What do you think of these reasons? Be sure to subscribe for more tips on living a healthy life!

以上就是來自我們 Psych2Go 的建議。你對這些理由有什麼想法？記得訂閱，以獲得更多使人生圓滿的秘訣！