team course if you haven't watched lesson number one I suggest that you

pause this video right now and click on the link in the description below

because if you want to get the most out of this course you're gonna have to

watch all of the videos in today's lesson we're gonna talk about how habits

work or more specifically how they are structured because remember our strategy

for the next couple of months is to focus all of our energy on creating good

new habits and in order for us to do so we're gonna have to understand how they

work psychologists know that there's a

certain structure that all habits follow there's dozens of models out there

depicting this but for the purposes of this video to make things easier for all

of us to understand I'm gonna use my favorite model the habit loop model

which was introduced by Charles Duhigg in his book the power of habit the habit

loop model contains three steps the first step is the Q the Q can come in

many shapes and forms it can be something in your environment like an

object a sound or a smell it could also be a certain time of day a location or

even an emotion whatever it is the Q serves one purpose it tells your brain

that it should start the habit and that's where the next step of the habit

loop comes in the second step of the habit loop is called the routine the

routine is the actual habit itself it's the behavior that you perform so if you

have a bad habit of smoking cigarettes it's the act of taking out your pack

lighting your cigarette and taking a poll this entire process is the routine

the third and final step of the habit loop is the reward the reward can come

in many shapes and forms and it varies from person to person it can even be a

combination of different things for our example of smoking cigarettes it could

be a quick spike in our dopamine levels which nicotine provides it could be a

break from work or it could even be the good feeling that comes from socializing

for people that like to smoke in groups the reason the habit loop is called a

loop is because of the reward if the reward for the habit is satisfying

enough your brain says okay if this cue appears and we do this routine then we

get a good reward and it keeps this information tucked away for next time so

the next time the cue appears your brain says oh look it's that cue again if we

do the same routine as last time we'll get a good reward just like last time

and each and every time you reach the reward this specific loop becomes

stronger and stronger to the point where you no longer even have to think about

the action you just do it when you reach this point where you no longer even have

to think about doing the routine that's when a habit is officially formed and

that's the habit loop now you're probably wondering well this is good

information and all but how exactly can I use this to overcome my own addiction

well this is important because it allows you to discover the cue routine reward

of your current addiction it's important to find out the cues for your addiction

because these are the cues that seem to appear in your life all of the time you

can take these cues and attach them to more positive routines like exercise or

meditation and if we can train our brain to associate these cues with those

routines we will have successfully replaced a bad habit with a good one

we'll dive deeper into this concept throughout the course now it's important

to become aware of what your rewards are because by doing so you'll discover the

driving force behind your addiction let's say for example you realize that

the reward for your pornography habit is that it helps you relieve stress maybe

you have a tough day at work work maybe you had a bad interaction with a girl

you like some of us turn to porn to relieve this sort of stress if that's

the case then we need to address this problem

you're not going to suddenly stop having stress in your life so we need to pick a

habit that can relieve stress a good example of this is the habit of lifting

heavy weights remember habits cannot truly be erased

the cue and reward can't really be changed but we can alter the routine and

that's the idea behind this entire course replace not a race so what I want

you to do right now is to grab a pen and paper and start sketching out the habit

loop for your own addiction the routine is pretty obvious it's the bad habit

itself but the cue can be a little tricky most of the time there's more

than one cue there's a variety of different situations that prompts us to

indulge in our addiction so think of as many as possible and write them down for

example here's a list of the cues that I wrote back in the day when I was in the

process of overcoming my own pornography addiction if I was drunk

if felt rejected if I had my phone or

laptop on my bed before going to sleep now when it comes to identifying the

rewards it can be a bit tricky as well for one every single bad habit that is

addictive involves an increase in dopamine levels but we have to dig

deeper than that and uncover the main rewards that we crave in the book the

power of habit Charles Duhigg looked at his bad habit of eating cookies every

single day at first glance you might think well the reward is probably the

sugar rush or the satisfaction of hunger but Duhigg soon discovered that it was

actually the reward of socializing because he would get up from his desk

walk to the cafeteria buy the cookie and talk to his co-workers he discovered

this by noticing that just eating the cookie wasn't enough to keep him

satisfied he would always want more we need to think about our own addiction

with this attention to detail a bad habit like pornography might provide you

with a sense of validation because to your brain there's hundreds of girls

that want to sleep with you another reward could be the fact that it helps

you fall asleep it could also be something that relieves stress or maybe

it could be something that makes you feel like you accomplished something

there's many many possibilities and the only way to really determine what the

rewards are is by analyzing your own life if you're someone who doesn't feel

the urges to masturbate after spending the entire day having a great time with

your friends then the reward for your addiction might be that it satisfies

your social needs if you don't feel the urges to masturbate when you get a

massage one day after feeling stressed at work your reward for your pornography

addiction might be the fact that it relieves stress so it's really up to you

to think about this part carefully and hypothesize what the rewards are for

your addiction chances are you're not going to finish this diagram in one

sitting you're probably going to think of some cues and come to the realization

about the rewards throughout the next week or so so make sure you add those to

your diagram because it's gonna play an extremely important role throughout this

course in our next lesson we're gonna talk about how long it takes to form a

habit there's a huge misconception going around about this some people say it

takes 21 days some say it takes 90 for the most part they're all wrong the team

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