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>> Professor, do you have a minute?
>> Sure thing, what can I do for you?
>> I wanted to talk to you about my grade.
I don't understand why you gave me an F.
>> That would probably be because you earned an F.
>> What do you mean?
>> What is your name again?
>> It's Sandy.
You really don't know my name after four months of class?
>> Well, you haven't exactly been in class for four months,
and you were sleeping or sending text messages when you were here.
I have just thought of you as the girl who doesn't care.
>> But why did I fail the course?
[MUSIC].
>> Because you literally managed to fail
every single aspect of this ridiculously simplified course.
>> What does that mean?
What did I fail?
>> Everything.
You failed the first exam and never even took the second test.
>> I was sick.
>> When?
>> When I missed the test.
>> That was two months ago.
>> Can I make it up?
>> Not anymore.
You also failed the third test and never handed
in your final research paper worth 30% of your grade.
>> I didn't know that was due.
Did you announce it in class?
>> Yes, about ten times.
You were probably not here because you hate school
and may be the worst student I have ever seen.
>> But I was sick.
>> I know the feeling.
Hey, do you have a safety pin?
>> No, why?
>> Because I would like to stab myself until I pass
out from blood loss so I don't have to continue this conversation.
>> Whatever.
Can I do extra credit?
>> No.
I already turned in final grades.
Why didn't you ask me about extra credit
at some point during the last three months?
>> My grandmother died.
>> I'm sorry to hear that.
>> So, can I do extra credit?
>> No.
>> I can bring you the obituary.
>> I don't want to see your grandmother's obituary.
I want to go home because I've been reading research papers for 27 hours.
>> But my boyfriend and I broke up.
>> What does that have to do with it?
>> I dumped him because he was cheating on me with my best friend.
The only person I could talk to about
these things was my grandfather and now he's dead.
>> I thought you said your grandmother died.
>> They both died in the same accident.
They were driving to see me because I was sad about cheating on my boyfriend.
>> I thought your boyfriend cheated on you.
>> He did.
So, can I do extra credit?
>> Even if you could invent a time machine
and travel back in time to personally interview Abraham Lincoln,
and I gave you 100 points of extra credit,
you would still only have a D for the course.
>> Okay, who is Abraham Lincoln?
>> Why are you here?
>> If I don't get a C in this course, I will
lose my financial aid and I will have to drop out of school.
It's terrible.
>> Why didn't you care about that before?
This is the first time you have ever spoken to me.
>> I was sick.
>> Okay, this conversation is over.
>> Are you calling me a liar?
>> I'm not calling you anything except a failure in this class.
Although, now that I think of it, you will probably fail in life as well.
>> How could you say that?
>> Because you scored 33 out of 200 total points and
you get 20 points for just having your name on the roster.
>> What if I do the research now?
>> No.
>> But can I?
>> No.
>> But.
Why are you being so mean?
>> Why won't you go away?
>> Because you won't help me.
>> I would have helped you two months ago while you were cheating on
your boyfriend and killing your grandparents, but
right now I just want to go home.
>> I'm going to appeal to the dean.
>> You could appeal to the Lord Almighty, but
no one could save your grade in this course.
>> This is the worst ever.
I'm going to tell my boyfriend.
>> Great.
You will probably find him at your best friend's apartment.
>> Good day to you, Candy.
>> My name's Sandy.
>> I said good day.
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