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  • Technology.

    科技

  • Love.

  • Marriage.

    婚姻

  • Side chicks.

    小三

  • Skinny people.

    骨瘦如材的人

  • Fat people.

    胖子

  • Scientists.

    科學家

  • Who... who pretend they're doing stuff for the camera.

    為了上鏡頭而假裝做事情

  • The world is ready for the next really expensive product.

    這個世界已經準備好迎接下一個非常貴的產品

  • Hi, my name is Steve Trabajo, founder and CEO of Pineapple.

    HI 我是鳳梨的創辦人和CEO,Steve Trabajo

  • Pineapple is like Apple,

    鳳梨就像蘋果

  • It's just a, it's a little crappier, or it's a lot, it's a lot crappier you know, thank you very much.

    只是有一點糟糕,或是更糟,謝謝

  • It's a lot crappier, you know? It's

    非常糟糕,你知道的,這...

  • Ooh.

    Oh

  • We're very excited to announce our new product that you definitely don't need,

    我們非常高興能夠宣布一個你絕對用不到的新產品

  • But we're gonna push it anyway,

    但我們必須推行他

  • Because we like money.

    因為我們愛錢

  • Introducing, for the first time ever,

    這是由史以來第一次的介紹

  • The Pineapple iPhone X.

    鳳梨 iphone X

  • It's amazing ... it's... it's ... I'm about to blow your mind of how crazy

    它非常棒.....我將要讓你知道它有多瘋狂

  • ... great ... it's gonna ... everybody's gonna have good time.

    ...太棒了..這將.....每個人將會有很好的時光

  • Let's talk about the new features. Thank you very much.

    讓我們討論一下它的特色,謝謝

  • Last one, huh?

    最後一杯,嗄?

  • Ah ahh

  • Let's...

    讓我們...

  • [burp]

    [打嗝]

  • Let's talk about the new features. Pineapple wireless headphones. Our scientists are working extremely hard

    讓我們來討論新的特色,鳳梨無線耳機,我們的科學家非常努力研究

  • Using state-of-the-art technology to develop wireless headphones.

    使用尖端科去去發展無線耳機

  • They're like the Apple wireless headphones,

    它們就像蘋果的無線耳機

  • But, they don't really they don't really work.

    但,他們並不... 並不真的可以用

  • Maria.

    Maria

  • Apple has Siri. Pineapple has Maria. Maria is like Siri, or she, except

    蘋果有 Siri 鳳梨有 Maria。 Maria 就像 Siri ,除了...

  • She's a little, she's a little crappier. She's got a little bit more attitude. Whatever you need, Maria will do it.

    它有點... 有點爛... 也有點個人主義,每當你需要幫助,Maria 會做到

  • If she's in the mood.

    假如她心情好

  • Hey, Maria.

    嘿, Maria

  • What do you want, Steve?

    你需要什麼,Steve?

  • Can you give me directions to the nearest Starbucks?

    可以跟我說最近的星巴克方向在哪嗎?

  • Just look it up on Google.

    去查詢 Google

  • Are you kidding, like, are you kidding me right now? What do I look like to you?

    你在開我玩笑嗎? 你把我當甚麼?

  • Relax, calm, calm down, calm down, I'm just asking. I'm asking, can you please help me out?

    放鬆,冷靜,冷靜,我只是問問,我問你可以幫我忙嗎?

  • No way, Jose, you can Google it.

    別想,Jose,你可以去 Google

  • Yo, what's with the attitude, bro?

    yo,這什麼態度,老兄?

  • I don't have attitude... already had coffee today, okay?

    我沒有態度,我今天已經喝咖啡了好嗎?

  • That's not true, that's not, that's not at all true, you're making stuff up, oh shut up!

    不對,這完全不對,你根本在瞎掰,給我閉嘴!

  • Racist Pineapple music.

    鳳梨的歧視音樂

  • Are you ever scrolling through your library...

    你曾經瀏覽資料庫...

  • like, trying to find that perfect song?

    想要找個完美個歌曲嗎?

  • Your problems are over.

    你的問題解決了

  • Introducing our new music detection feature,

    我來介紹我們新的音樂偵測功能

  • Where, as soon as you put the headphones in, it automatically plays the song that's perfect for you based on how you look.

    只要你戴上耳機,她會自動播放和你的長相完美匹配的歌曲

  • [urban music]

    [都市音樂]

  • [pop music]

    [流行音樂]

  • [Latin music]

    [拉丁音樂]

  • Some people call it racist. We call it the future. El futuro.

    有些人稱它種族歧視,我們稱它掌握未來的特色

  • Waterproof case.

    防水功能

  • We've developed insanely advanced technology to make sure that if you have an accident with liquid and your phone,

    我們極力的發展先進的技術,以避免你的手機與液體發生問題

  • Your phone is safe.

    你的手機很安全

  • Baby.

    怎麼樣阿

  • If you purchase the Pineapple iPhone X right now, we will throw in an external battery for free.

    假如你現在購買鳳梨 iPhone X,我們會免費附贈外部電池

  • Blood-lock.

    血液鎖

  • Our newest feature makes it very hard for somebody to unlock your phone.

    我們最新的功能讓手機非常難被解鎖

  • With Blood-lock, you can only unlock your phone using your own blood. All you need is something

    只要有血液鎖,你就可以用你的血液解鎖,你只需一樣東西

  • Just very sharp, like a knife, like this, and then you just, you know, you cut your...

    就是非常銳利,像刀,就像這樣,然後就,你知道的... 你割下你的...

  • Okay, then you take your phone, and you, just...

    OK,你拿起你的手機,然後你只要

  • And it unlocks.

    它就解鎖了

  • I want a safe... I have a vision of making the world a safer place.

    我想要個安全..我有個讓世界變得更安全的想法

  • I hope you rush to stores immediately to buy the new Pineapple iPhone X, because it is

    我希望你立即衝去商店買新的鳳梨iPhone X,因為它

  • Definitely a rip-off.

    絕對是個敲詐品

  • Pineapple.

    鳳梨

  • Think a little crappier.

    思考的更糟糕些

  • But it's er, it's cheaper than Apple, but it is definitely a little crappier. I'm not gonna lie.

    它... 比Apple便宜,不過我老實說,它比較垃圾

Technology.

科技

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酸度爆表!PineApple iPhone X 發布會 (iPhone X by Pineapple | Rudy Mancuso)

  • 7452 397
    董得恩 發佈於 2018 年 02 月 25 日
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