Guys, you have to be patient.

有人要跳樓，誰的話他都不聽

It’s... Aaaah!

不要跳

Aww, Barry! Why?

想想愛你的人

Sorry, I like it well done, yeah.

想想愛你的這顆炸彈

I think that’s about it, and, uh...

是Sparky嗎？

Congratulations. You’re now Golem and wife.

對，沒錯，就是Sparky

Whoa, this just got weird.

他愛你

So... Do I get the building permit?

從他這根導火線就看得出來

You can’t remodel a level 2 Laboratory into a level 7 Wizard Tower.

Sparky，我下來了

How about a level 6 one?

這樣就對了

Why must two be followed by three? This town could think outside the box!

還有很多城牆等著你去炸呢

How about Archer Towers with a room to elevate you up it instead of stairs?

別過來！

How about Freeze Spell lockers, so that I don’t hold them in my hands?

停！停！

Let’s strike for a better Town Hall!

我剛在訓練營那，他們在造新兵種

Who’s with me?

全新的兵種哦！

OK, I hear you loud and clear.

你怎麼不早說

I’m gonna upgrade this whole darn place immediately!

這可是件大事

What the...?

不中用的蠢陷阱！

That’s as close as we get to immediately.

你倒是彈出來啊

Yeah! We are awesome!

大多數人眺望大海

Amazing battle! Three stars! Put 'em up, boys!

看到的只是海水

My sword! I lost my sword! Oh no, it’s my best friend...

但我不同

I can’t live without my sword! What am I gonna do?

我看到的是無盡的財富

Calm down, buddy. You probably left it on the battlefield.

用不完的金幣和聖水

Ooh... I’m gonna go look.

很久以後人們聽到「Christo」這個名字

I gotta find... my sword!

他們會想……

Excuse me, I've lost my sword. Any chance you’ve seen it lying around?

海那邊什麼都沒有

‘Bout yay big, the most beautiful metal a Barbarian’s ever seen?

有人信你才怪！

All I’ve seen here is stuff that makes great soup.

就是這樣，Chet我是不會錯的

Would some great soup interest you?

我相信他

Check out that rubble. There’s all kinds of sharp stuff there.

Christo，我們部落急需資源

Nothing good for soup though.

我願意在你這個夢想家身上賭一把

Ah, a replacement sword. Interesting...

尊貴的女皇，夢想家聽候吩咐

Ooh, sharp piece of wood!

村莊的未來就靠你了！

- En Garde! - Speak English!

乘著你的戰車出發吧！

Ah, who am I kidding? My sword is gone forever!

- 耶！一路平安！ - 玩得開心！

A Barbarian without a sword is just a...

哇，廣闊的海洋

Just a... I don’t even know!

等著我的是怎樣的冒險？

I was a proud Barbarian

啊，廣闊的海洋

Now I don’t know what I am

糟透了的冒險

A trusty sword my identity made

第1天

Is life worth living without a blade?

第27天

I’m like a Minion who’s lost his horde

我要是知道怎麼控制這鬼東西，我早就掉頭往回走了

What’s a Barbarian without a...

啊

That’s enough of that.

那是陸地嗎？

Doc, how do you cure a Barbarian who’s lost his sword?

怎麼突然飛得這麼快，而且……

As simple as changing you into someone who doesn't need a sword.

海鷗？

Hold still… Heeeyahh!

你想加入我的尋寶之旅，一起揚名致富嗎？

Ah, I don't know. Something feels off.

不好意思，這場冒險註定是孤獨者的遊戲

Not a deciduous type of guy. Got it... Heeeyahh!

再見

Much better, no?

當我剛剛沒說，我不想一個人啊

Now I see you, and I don't think "Hey, where's that Builder's Hut sword?"

是陸地！

Oh, geez, I don’t know.

沒有金幣

You got anything with two feet, and a place to wear a belt?

沒有聖水

Okeydoke… Heeeyahh!

只有一些農作物和……

- What is this? - I warned you there were risks.

呃，是肥料的氣味嗎？

This is horrible. I’ll be the tree.

我們還是走吧，你覺得呢？

Take me back to being a tree. I look like an idiot.

走吧

Can’t do that. I’m a Wizard, not a magician.

快看！

Ahhh…

好多我們沒見過的東西

That flat Barbarian should have been me.

如果我們能拿下這些原住民海島， 想像一下我們能得到的資源……

What the heck are you?

還是再看看下一個島嶼吧

I don’t know what I am anymore.

好

So, you’re taking suggestions? You got a staff...

是的，是的，我完全同意！

You’re a Witch!

多麼富饒的村莊

- Summon something! - Huh?

我們的等待總算沒白費啊

You know, bring the bones out!

我代表弓箭女皇，宣佈佔領這個村莊

I have children? I’ve always wanted to have kids!

佔領者：瘋狂部落軍隊11273！

Thank you. I feel much better.

Christo？

Kids, attack the nice gentleman.

你在幹嘛？

Found your sword.

這本來就是我們的村莊啊

My sword! Thank you!

但是……怎麼會這樣？

But now I am a Witch with a Barbarian sword.

你離開後，Chet把村莊裡的所有建築都升級了

I’ve got a soup for that.

別難過，這一趟你也有功勞啊

Once again a Barbarian

你不是帶回來一隻海鷗嘛！

I love being what I am

我畢生的事業沒有意義

That’s enough of that.

完全沒有意義

Stop! It is normal to wait for upgrades.

（我都吃了些什麼？）

Don't get angry. That just hurts you.

就是這樣，Chet我是不會錯的

She's right! I hate anger so much!

那……

Occupied!

這個新兵種，他是誰啊？

I was reading that.

也有可能是「她」啊

Everyone, instead of lashing out, embrace the wonders around you.

還是什麼都看不到

Builder, rather than pounding on that tree,

新兵種出來很酷的話，告訴我一聲好嗎？

give it a big hug.

(女士之夜) (女巫和瓦基麗武神可免費暢飲！)

I feel better.

看看這個村莊

I wanna feel better. Gimme some of that.

完全被人遺忘了

I can’t believe I’m finally here.

Slayer32已經好幾周沒照料這個村莊

Today’s the day my son becomes a Hooooog Riiiider!

真為他感到羞愧

And to think this used to be my happy place.

別的村莊都不想來掠奪這裡

This is a big moment, like when your mohawk grew in.

這裡挖不到金幣 （什麼都願意挖！）

Dad, stop, you’re embarrassing me!

採不到聖水

Sorry, son. I’m just so excited about teaching you to drive!

這個炸彈人既沒有炸彈可點，也沒有城牆可炸

Ready to take the wheel?

什麼炸彈人

It’s not a wheel, dad! It’s a rope! I know what I’m doing.

我是野蠻人！

Great, now I got to reset those!

我只是一年沒吃過東西了才變成這樣

Slow down now.

這個村莊就只剩一面無望的白旗了

Oh! Watch out!

Slayer32，你就不能振作一點嗎？

- Sorry! - You’re making me nervous!

到底要我們怎麼做，你才會重新照料這個村莊？

I’m calm, I’m calm, I’m... No, no, no! You’re about to make us dead!

（古人云）

- Dad, stop! - Stop what? Saving our lives?

（村莊之業需全村之力）

- Get off my back! - OK, fine! Show me how it’s done, son!

（我們被洗劫一空）

Let’s fire up this pig!

（復興大業難上加難）

No, no! Not arrows! Not arrows!

（我們被拋棄遺忘）

We won't make it!

（也許古語並不可信）

Yes, we are!

（但我們拾起破碎的心）

Okay, let’s get this gold mine out of here.

（唱出我們心中的悲涼）

Oh, no! Don’t get up! I can get it myself!

（我們沒有金幣）

Good. Good. We’ve banished all anger and violence.

（我們沒有聖水）

Breathe in peace and tranquility and love.

（村莊已毀）

You’re all doing beautifully, enlightened ones.

（無人來救）

Be proud of yourselves. You’re bringing peace to this village forever!

（無人來修）

Attack! We’re being attacked!

等等！別唱了！

Come on, grab your weapons! This is real! We’ll be wiped out! Wake up!

有人注意到這村莊了

There’s time for peace and time for violence.

資源車收集了

I guess most of the time it should be violence.

炸彈重置了

Don’t worry. I’ve got a soup for this.

哥布林也洗乾淨了

Thank you!

感謝Slayer32

Why aren’t they fighting?

村莊的情況變好了

It’s a thin broth. It takes three hours to kick in.

村莊不再被人忽視

It’s yours, son. The keys don’t do anything.

這裡有了希望，也有了加農炮

Thanks, dad.

（摧毀程度100%）

Sure, son. Ready for your brand new hog?

現在情況比以前更差

Now, at sunset, your hog is gonna think it’s bedtime...

（被遺忘的村莊 一片悲涼） （被摧毀的村莊 更生絕望）

- I know. - ...so wake him up often with a shout!

（Raymond & Julia）

Well, you didn’t know, or you would have done it!

很久很久以前

How’s the handle?

真好

Well, like a... dream!

她們能上戰場