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  • Hello, this is Mr Sato and I'm gonna help you with your college application essay, no pressure or anything.

    您好,我是佐藤先生,我將幫助您完成大學申請論文,沒有任何壓力。

  • But along with your last Will and Testament, the college application is probably one of the most important compositions you will ever write.

    但是,與你的遺願和遺囑一樣,大學申請可能是你所寫過的最重要的作文之一。

  • How important is the essay?

    作文有多重要?

  • Well, that depends on what kind of student you are.

    這取決於你是什麼樣的學生。

  • You probably fall into one of the following three categories.

    您可能屬於以下三類人之一。

  • If you're the kind of student who's in the 95th percentile on the sat your grade point average is a 4.0 and you have an impressive list of activities and leadership positions, then the essay might be a little less important for you.

    如果你是那種考試成績在 95% 以上、平均分達到 4.0、有一系列令人印象深刻的活動和上司職位的學生,那麼作文對你來說可能就不那麼重要了。

  • The college may have already decided that they want you and all you can do in your essay is to blow it by coming off like a personality free grades seeking robot.

    大學可能已經決定要你了,而你在論文中的表現卻像一個追求自由成績的機器人,這隻會讓大學失望。

  • You can now stop watching this video and go back to annotating the complete works of William Thackeray.

    現在您可以停止觀看這段視頻,繼續為《威廉-薩克雷全集》做註釋了。

  • But most students fall into that gray area in the middle.

    但大多數學生屬於中間的灰色地帶。

  • And if this is you, I want you to imagine that the person reading your essay will be comparing you to 99 other applicants who on paper have all the same qualifications as you.

    如果這就是你,我希望你想象一下,閱讀你論文的人將把你與其他 99 位申請者進行比較,而這些申請者在論文上與你具有相同的資質。

  • The same test scores, the same GPA, the same favorable teacher recommendations, maybe one or two extracurricular activities.

    同樣的考試成績、同樣的 GPA、同樣優秀的教師推薦信,也許還有一兩項課外活動。

  • Your essay is what will set you apart from the other 99.

    你的論文將使你從其他 99 人中脫穎而出。

  • Let's call the student Doris.

    我們就叫她多麗絲吧。

  • Her college essay is absolutely crucial to Doris.

    她的大學論文對多麗絲來說絕對至關重要。

  • It could very well determine whether or not she gets accepted or maybe you're a lackluster student with poor grades and no extracurricular activities.

    這很可能決定她是否被錄取,或者你是一個成績差、沒有課外活動的乏善可陳的學生。

  • Let's call this student, Jane, the college or university usually admits a few students with weaker qualifications to give a break to students who stand out in some non-academic way who look like they might really do something special if given the chance, Jane might bring something interesting and valuable to the school, she might be a deep thinker who has made some mistakes or has had some bad luck like family problems or maybe nearly all of the students at the university are the same homogeneous in some way culturally, racially, economically and Jane would bring a perspective to class discussions and study groups that others won't have.

    學院或大學通常會招收一些資質較弱的學生,讓那些在非學術方面表現突出的學生脫穎而出,如果有機會,這些學生看起來可能真的會做出一些特別的事情、她可能是一個思想深刻的人,犯過一些錯誤,或者運氣不好,比如家庭問題,也可能大學裡幾乎所有的學生在文化、種族、經濟等方面都是一樣的,簡會給課堂討論和學習小組帶來別人沒有的觀點。

  • The university wants that not out of generosity, but to create a lively intellectual environment where not everyone sees through the same cultural lens.

    大學希望這樣做並不是出於慷慨,而是為了創造一個生動活潑的知識環境,在這樣的環境中,並不是每個人都能用同樣的文化視角來看待問題。

  • So that could be Jane's chance.

    所以這可能是簡的機會。

  • You already know most of what you need to know things you've already learned in your English classes about essay writing, apply to your college application, essay as well, organize effectively write with personality and emotional commitment.

    你已經知道了大部分你需要知道的東西,你已經在英語課上學到了關於論文寫作的知識,應用到你的大學申請中,論文也是如此,有效地組織寫作要有個性和情感投入。

  • What we call voice, use, vivid word choices and proofread your work for conventions.

    我們稱之為語音、用法、生動的選詞,並校對您的作品是否符合慣例。

  • Errors sound familiar.

    錯誤聽起來很熟悉。

  • And here's the best single piece of advice I can give you start early so that you can revise thoroughly and meaningfully.

    我能給你的最好的建議就是儘早開始,這樣你就能進行全面而有意義的修改。

  • If you're a chronic procrastinator, make yourself start early so that you can write more than a single draft.

    如果你是一個長期拖延症患者,那麼讓自己儘早開始寫作,這樣你就能寫出不止一個草稿。

  • If you think you write best under pressure.

    如果你認為自己在壓力下寫作能力最強。

  • Don't kid yourself, give yourself the time to do your best work.

    別自欺欺人了,給自己一點時間去做最好的工作吧。

  • So let's talk about organization.

    那麼,讓我們來談談組織工作。

  • You've probably written several essays for school and your teacher, I would hope will have talked to you about how to organize an essay.

    你可能在學校寫過幾篇作文,我希望你的老師會跟你講過如何組織作文。

  • But if you like Jane were busy watching funny cat videos that day, let me refresh your memory, begin with an attention getting intro or hook.

    但如果你和簡一樣,那天正忙著看有趣的貓咪視頻,讓我來提醒你一下,開頭要有吸引眼球的引子或鉤子。

  • You can look at my video on hooks as well, then include or imply your thesis.

    您也可以看看我關於鉤子的視頻,然後加入或暗示您的論點。

  • The main point of your essay, which in this case is you should admit me to your school.

    你的文章的重點,在本例中就是你應該讓我進入你的學校。

  • The body of your essay will show the reader why you should be admitted.

    文章的正文將向讀者說明您應該被錄取的原因。

  • Don't talk a lot about things already in your application.

    不要大談申請材料中已有的內容。

  • They already know those things and they need a human face now to put on your GPA, your sat or AC T scores your school activities, et cetera.

    他們已經知道了這些事情,現在他們需要一個人的面孔,把你的 GPA、你的 sat 或 AC T 分數、你的學校活動,等等。

  • Instead, the body of your essay should make clear that you are a real human being, not just some phony trying to tell them what they want to hear and that if they give you the opportunity to get an education at their college or university, you'll go out into the world after graduation and do meaningful things with it.

    相反,你的論文正文應該清楚地表明,你是一個真正的人,而不是一個試圖告訴他們想聽什麼的金光黨,如果他們給你機會在他們的學院或大學接受教育,你畢業後就會去外面的世界做有意義的事情。

  • Your conclusion should be concise.

    結論應簡明扼要。

  • Don't ramble on after you've made your point.

    闡述完觀點後,不要喋喋不休。

  • It wouldn't be a bad idea to directly say that you hope they'll give you the opportunity to show them what you can do or something like that.

    直接說 "希望他們給你機會,讓他們看看你的能力 "之類的話也不錯。

  • I made a whole other video on essay organizations so consider watching that for more detailed information.

    我還製作了一個關於論文組織的完整視頻,請考慮觀看以瞭解更多詳細信息。

  • Next voice, what we call voice is basically two things, a sense of your personality and emotional commitment in your college essay.

    其次是聲音,我們所說的聲音基本上有兩點,一是你的個性,二是你在大學論文中的情感投入。

  • It's hugely important to convey a sense of who you are through your words.

    通過文字表達自己的身份是非常重要的。

  • Your essay, as I've said is the human face on your application.

    正如我所說的那樣,你的論文是你申請材料的人性化體現。

  • The reader wants to get to know you so convey personality and an awareness that you are communicating with another human being.

    讀者希望瞭解你,是以你要傳遞個性,讓讀者意識到你是在與他人交流。

  • One way to do this is to anticipate your readers questions and answer them.

    方法之一就是預測讀者的問題並回答他們。

  • Let's say you were writing about your hobby, chainsaw, juggling, anticipate your readers' questions with something like this.

    比方說,你在寫自己的愛好--電鋸、雜耍時,可以這樣預測讀者的問題。

  • Now, you're probably wondering what kind of bonehead would juggle chainsaws.

    現在,你可能會想,什麼樣的傻瓜會玩電鋸雜耍呢?

  • But like anything else in life, the risks are minimal if you know what you're doing, use of personal pronouns, like I me, my, you and your are perfectly appropriate in this kind of essay.

    但是,就像生活中的其他事情一樣,如果你知道自己在做什麼,風險是微乎其微的。在這類文章中,使用人稱代詞,如我、我的、你和你的,是完全合適的。

  • Also, it's OK to use informal words and colloquial phrases so that you convey a sense of your personality, but just remember a little goes a long way.

    此外,使用非正式的詞語和口語化的短語也是可以的,這樣可以讓人感覺到你的個性,但請記住,少說為佳。

  • The second aspect of voice, emotional commitment simply means that you are interested in what you're saying, that you're saying something you actually care about.

    語音的第二個方面是情感承諾,簡單地說,就是你對自己所說的話感興趣,你在說你真正關心的事情。

  • Don't be afraid to write with passion or intensity.

    不要害怕寫出激情或力度。

  • Writing on autopilot is the quickest way to sound generic and boring.

    自動寫作是讓文章聽起來平庸乏味的最快方法。

  • What other than yourself do you really care about?

    除了你自己,你還真正關心什麼?

  • Think about what you really wanna say and then say it like you mean it, a former Vice Chancellor of admissions at the University of Denver said in a Denver post article that applicants shouldn't exaggerate either.

    丹佛大學前招生副校長在丹佛郵報的一篇文章中說,申請者也不應該誇大其詞。

  • Most readers can tell if you're stretching the truth when you say that the death of your second cousin's stepfather's uncle caused you to fail geometry.

    當你說你二表哥的繼父的叔叔的死導致你幾何不及格時,大多數讀者都能看出你是否在誇大事實。

  • Part of voice is authenticity.

    聲音的一部分就是真實性。

  • So keep it real, be sincere.

    所以,要真實,要真誠。

  • Think about what kind of person you are an admissions director at Texas Christian University said in the Arizona Daily star that if you're a serious person, you should write a serious essay if you're funny, write a funny essay.

    德克薩斯基督教大學的一位招生主任在《亞利桑那州日報》(Arizona Daily star)上說,如果你是一個嚴肅的人,你就應該寫一篇嚴肅的文章;如果你很幽默,那就寫一篇幽默的文章。

  • And I think if you're laid back, you could be a little laid back.

    我想,如果你很悠閒,你可以悠閒一點。

  • But also let it peak out that there's something other than your high score in a video game that you really care about be yourself.

    但也要讓它峰迴路轉,除了你在電子遊戲中的高分之外,你還真正在乎的是你自己。

  • But be your best self.

    但要做最好的自己。

  • Word choice means using interesting striking phrases that sound good when read out loud, be specific.

    選詞是指使用有趣的、引人注目的、讀起來朗朗上口的短語,要有針對性。

  • Don't say my friend and I grew apart and that made me really sad.

    別說,我和我的朋友漸漸疏遠了,這讓我非常難過。

  • Say when I finished talking, my friend looked at me blankly waiting for the punch line and I realized that she didn't understand me that despite our many years together, we were still strangers that all of us are essentially castaways on separate deserted islands.

    當我說完後,我的朋友茫然地看著我,等待著我的答案,我意識到她不理解我,儘管我們在一起多年,但我們仍然是陌生人,我們基本上都是各自荒島上的棄兒。

  • Use of metaphors and similes can really add flavor to a bland piece of writing.

    使用比喻和隱喻確實能為平淡的文章增色不少。

  • On the other hand, don't use words.

    另一方面,不要使用文字。

  • You don't understand.

    你不明白。

  • I call this thesaurus itis.

    我稱這個詞庫為 itis。

  • It means over using a thesaurus to replace small words with big ones.

    這意味著過度使用詞庫,以大字代替小字。

  • Don't do this.

    不要這樣做

  • It makes you sound dumber, not smarter because you probably aren't using all those words correctly and it makes you sound ridiculous.

    這讓你聽起來更笨,而不是更聰明,因為你可能沒有正確使用所有這些詞,這讓你聽起來很可笑。

  • It should go without saying though.

    這一點不言而喻。

  • I know from experience that it doesn't, that you should thoroughly check and recheck your writing for conventions, errors, spelling, punctuation, capitalization, any format requirements the university may have specified after you've checked your essay.

    我的經驗告訴我,並不是這樣的,你應該在檢查完你的論文後,徹底檢查並重新檢查你的寫作是否存在常規、錯誤、拼寫、標點符號、大小寫以及大學可能規定的任何格式要求。

  • Have someone else check it by someone else.

    讓其他人來檢查。

  • I don't mean your computer's spell check while you're at it.

    我指的不是你電腦的拼寫檢查。

  • Why not confer with a skilled essay writer?

    為什麼不與技術嫻熟的論文作者商議呢?

  • You can just find some well written essays and read them.

    你可以找一些寫得好的文章讀一讀。

  • Get some ideas for different ways.

    為不同的方式出謀劃策。

  • You can sound different tones and different techniques for achieving certain effects.

    您可以用不同的音調和不同的技巧來實現某些效果。

  • They don't have to be college application essays.

    不一定非要寫大學申請論文。

  • I recommend the best American essays series, ask your librarian about those and when you read them, notice how each writer has his or her own personality.

    我向您推薦 "最佳美國散文叢書",您可以向您的圖書館員詢問這些叢書,在閱讀這些叢書時,請注意每位作家都有自己的個性。

  • Notice how good writers show rather than tell.

    注意優秀作家是如何展示而不是講述的。

  • That means if Doris remember Doris is telling a story about how her family's car broke down in the middle of the desert.

    也就是說,如果多麗絲還記得多麗絲正在講述她家的汽車在沙漠中央拋錨的故事。

  • She shouldn't just tell us that and stop there.

    她不應該只告訴我們這些,而就此打住。

  • She should also make us see the desert, make us see what she sees and feel what she feels.

    她還應該讓我們看到沙漠,讓我們看到她所看到的,感受到她所感受到的。

  • She might describe the surrounding desert, put in some details about the physical process of getting help or helping her parent fix the car as well as importantly, her thoughts and feelings, while all of this is going on, all of which will be revealing to the reader that Doris has qualities that make her more interesting than those other 99 applicants.

    她可能會描寫周圍的沙漠,寫一些關於求助或幫助父母修車的物理過程的細節,更重要的是,寫她在這一切發生時的想法和感受,所有這些都將向讀者揭示多麗絲的特質,使她比其他 99 位應聘者更有趣。

  • Now, most application essay prompts are pretty standard and open ended, like write a personal statement that gives us a sense of you as an individual, that sort of thing.

    現在,大多數申請論文的提示都是非常標準和開放式的,比如寫一份個人陳述,讓我們瞭解你是一個什麼樣的人,諸如此類。

  • But some colleges ask really strange questions like, how do you feel about Wednesday or how about this one?

    但有些大學會問一些非常奇怪的問題,比如 "你覺得週三怎麼樣?

  • Don't let these kinds of questions throw you off.

    不要被這些問題嚇倒。

  • They're still just trying to get a sense of who you are and how you think answer the question in the spirit in which it was asked in a creative and original way.

    他們只是想了解你是什麼樣的人,以及你是如何按照提問的精神,以創造性和獨創性的方式回答問題的。

  • And along the way, make them conclude without you actually saying it that you are a student, they really, really want attending their school when it comes down to it, those wacky application prompts are really not that different from the more ordinary ones.

    同時,讓他們在不經意間就得出結論:你是一個學生,他們真的非常希望你能到他們的學校就讀,歸根結底,那些古怪的申請提示其實和普通的申請提示並沒有什麼不同。

  • Finally, don't be afraid to ask for help, talk to your school counselor and visit your local public library.

    最後,不要害怕尋求幫助,多與學校輔導員交流,多去當地的公共圖書館。

  • Look up articles about college application, essays and newspapers and magazines.

    查找有關大學申請、論文和報紙雜誌的文章。

  • See if your local library has a database of news articles like Proquest.

    看看當地圖書館是否有 Proquest 等新聞文章數據庫。

  • And when you have a draft, don't be afraid to ask parents and teachers to read your essay and give you constructive feedback.

    打好草稿後,不要害怕請家長和老師閱讀你的作文,並給你建設性的意見。

  • But remember no article, book, video or school counselor can write your essay for you.

    但請記住,任何文章、書籍、視頻或學校輔導員都無法為你撰寫論文。

  • It's something that only you could create from your life, history, your personality and your imagination.

    這是隻有你才能從你的生活、歷史、個性和想象力中創造出來的東西。

  • So I've given you eight tips.

    所以,我給了你八條建議。

  • One, start early.

    第一,儘早開始。

  • Don't wait until the last minute.

    不要等到最後一刻。

  • Two, organize effectively.

    第二,有效組織。

  • You can check out my video on how to organize an essay.

    您可以查看我關於如何組織文章的視頻。

  • Three, write with personality and emotional commitment.

    三,寫作要有個性和情感投入。

  • Four use specific interesting word choices.

    四是使用具體有趣的詞語。

  • Five check for conventions, errors.

    五是檢查慣例和錯誤。

  • Six also read some good essays, seven read articles about college application, essays and eight get some constructive criticism.

    六是閱讀一些好的論文,七是閱讀有關大學申請、論文的文章,八是獲得一些建設性的責備意見。

  • Follow those eight tips and you'll improve your odds of getting that acceptance letter.

    遵循這八條建議,你就能提高收到錄取通知書的機率。

  • Good luck.

    祝你好運

Hello, this is Mr Sato and I'm gonna help you with your college application essay, no pressure or anything.

您好,我是佐藤先生,我將幫助您完成大學申請論文,沒有任何壓力。

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A1 初級 中文 美國腔

大學申請論文怎麼寫 (How to write your college application essay)

  • 53 6
    Mayskyey 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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