Name: 跟憂鬱症的朋友，到底該怎麼相處比較好呢？ (How to talk to someone with depression)
Uploaded: 2018-05-05T21:01:00.000Z
Duration: 3 min 18 s
Description: 人人都會有低潮的時候，對於那些特別憂鬱的朋友，應該怎麼與他們溝通呢？ 1qualification0:03 qualification 的意思為「資格」及「資格證書」，在找工作或申請學校時的 qualification 即表示「條件」，若都有符合對方列出來的條件，代表你具有申請的資格！ He had all of the...

Depression is the only illness where people want to know your qualifications. I'm asked all the time:

憂鬱症是唯一一種大家會想知道你有什麼資格可以得到的病，我老是被問到：

Like… what do you have to be depressed about?

- Well, I... - You're like, I don't know, in a loving relationship?

- 這個嘛，我... - 你不是還在熱戀期嗎？

- Yeah, but... - …and your career is going well. So like, why then?

- 對，但... - 而且你事業順利，所以，到底為什麼？

Well, I mean, there's no good like reason for it. That's why it's called clinical depression,

我的意思是，會這樣根本沒有理由，所以才叫憂鬱症啊

because if there was the reason I would just be justifiably sad.

因為如果找得到原因，我就只是理所當然的難過而已

And people are always offering me unsolicited advice like:

Meditation is the answer because depression can't exist in the zen zone.

冥想就是解藥，因為在禪的世界中憂鬱並不存在

Mental illness is its own unique conundrum because if you have a physical ailment people are immediately sympathetic

心理疾病本身就難以理解，因為如果你有身體上的病痛，人們立刻能夠感同身受

Hey, let me know if there's anything that I could do for you.

Oh, you poor baby. Do you want me to bring  you some healing crystals?

噢，可憐的孩子，要不要我帶一些治療水晶給你？

But if that illness is mental? Yeah, they kind of have a different attitude about it.

但如果病痛是心理上的呢？這個嘛，他們的態度就不同了

I think that the best way to talk to someone with depression is actually not talking at all

我認為和有憂鬱症的人交談的最佳方式其實是不要講話，

but listening with compassion and not trying to provide solutions.

而是同情地傾聽，也不要提供解決方法

I mean unless that solution is encouraging someone to go to therapy

我是說，除非這個解決方法是鼓勵他接受治療

which is great. Because therapy is awesome. Everyone should do it.

這樣就很好，因為治療很棒，大家都該去接受一下治療

But not necessarily trying to fix somebody's illness.

And I know that our instinct when someone is sad is to try to cheer them up or try to help them

我知道我們的本性就是會在有人傷心的時候試著為他們打氣或幫助他們

But depression isn't personal and it's not going to go away with a pep talk.

但是憂鬱症不是個人問題，也不會因為加油打氣而消失

Is there anything that I can do right now?

Look, you may not believe it right now, but the way that you're feeling is totally going to change.

聽著，你現在可能不會相信，但是你現在的感覺將來一定會變的

Like depression is just all in your head. You can totally overcome it, it's just mind over matter.

憂鬱症都是你想出來的，你絕對可以克服，只要換個想法就沒事了

And I think it's also really important to note that you should try to protect yourself too when dealing with a depressed person

和憂鬱的人相處的同時，也要記得保護自己，這點很重要

If you're naturally an empath or susceptible to other people's emotions,

如果你天生是個有同理心的人，或是很容易受別人情緒影響

it can be really difficult to separate yourself from it.

I mean, I've definitely been guilty of trying to be there for a depressed person,

在這事上我有經驗，想要陪伴憂鬱的人

and letting their illness affect my mental state which isn't good for either of us.

卻讓他們的疾病影響到我的心理狀態，這對雙方都不好

So setting your own boundaries to protect your emotions is so important.

所以設定界限來保護自己的情緒非常重要

And if you're talking to a depressed person or depressed yourself

假如你在和憂鬱的人交談，或你自己變得憂鬱了

I think a good rule of thumb, for that and for life in general, is just that:

我認為最重要的原則，不論是在這件事或是生活中大大小小的事情上，就是：

So listening with compassion can make a huge difference in somebody's life

帶著同情心傾聽可以大大的改變那個人的生活

I know it sounds like so simple and obvious, but you would be surprised at how rarely it actually happens.

我知道聽起來簡單明瞭，但你會很驚訝，真正做到的人其實很少

Thank you so much to audible for sponsoring today's episode .

非常感謝 audible 贊助今天的節目

You can listen when you're driving, when you're doing the dishes,

你可以在開車的時候、洗碗的時候聽

or if you and a friend just wanna like sit in silence, and listen to a story.

或者你和朋友只想靜靜坐著聽故事

So I'm currently listening to Sabriel which I love because it's this three-part trilogy starring a kick-ass lady necromancer.

我最近在聽【莎貝兒：冥界之鑰】，我很喜歡，因為這三部曲的主角是位超酷的年輕女巫師

Audible is offering a free 30 day trial to give you a chance to try out their service.

audible 提供 30 天免費試用，讓你有機會試用他們的服務

You can go to audible.com/anna to download Sabriel for free or another book of your choice.

搜尋 audible.com/anna，免費下載【莎貝兒：冥界之鑰】或其他書籍

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跟憂鬱症的朋友，到底該怎麼相處比較好呢？ (How to talk to someone with depression)

episode

meditation

awesome

obvious