and in today's video

今天的影片

We are going to look at, five ways to improve academic essay writing

我們要來學習五個增進英文學術寫作的技巧

Okay? Or TOEFL writing, IELTS writing.

或是托福寫作、雅思寫作

This doesn't have to do with when you write a letter to your friends.

這樣的寫作方式不是像你們寫信給朋友那樣

Okay? We're talking specifically about formal writing, maybe business writing, or academic writing.

我們主要會講的是正式的寫作方式，可能像是商業寫作、或是學術方面的寫作

Okay, so let's get started.

好了，我們開始吧

My first tip on how to improve writing is do not use contractions.

我的第一個讓寫作進步的技巧是不用縮寫

Okay? And again this is for academic writing.

再提醒你們一次，這是給學術寫作上的建議

So what is the contraction?

所以縮寫指的是哪些呢？

"don't," "can't," "shouldn't," "couldn't,"

像是「don't」、「can't」、「shouldn't」、「couldn't」

"wouldn't," "isn't," "haven't," "hasn't."

「wouldn't」、「isn't」、「haven't」、和「hasn't」

Okay, so it's the short form of,

所以這指的就是縮寫

for example, "don't" is the contraction of "do not." Okay?

例如「don't」是「do not」的縮寫

So, it's better to actually write out the word in full in academic and formal business writing.

所以要在專業和正式的商業寫作中寫出完整的單字是比較好的

So, instead of "don't," use "do not." Instead of "can't," use "cannot."

所以寫「do not」，而不是寫「don't」。寫「cannot」，而不是寫「can't」

And notice how with "do not," it's actually two words.

有注意到「do not」嗎，實際上就是兩個單字

"Cannot" is just one word.

「Cannot」就是一個字而已

"Shouldn't" becomes "should not."

「Shouldn't」要寫成「should not」才對

"Couldn't" becomes "could not."

「Couldn't」要寫成「could not」才對

"Wouldn't" — "would not."

「Wouldn't」要寫成「would not」才對

"Isn't" — "is not."

「Isn't」要寫成「is not」才對

"Haven't" — "have not"

「haven‘t」要寫成「have not」才對

"Hasn't" — "has not." Okay.

「Hasn't」要寫成「has not」才對

So, don't use these, use these.

不要用這些縮寫，用這些才對

Okay. So now let's look at Tip #2.

所以現在我們來看第二個技巧

So Tip #2 is avoid "there is" or "there are." Okay?

第二個技巧是避免用到「there is」和「there are」

So why do we avoid "there is" or "there are"?

為什麼我們要避免用到「there is」和「there are」呢？

Well one of the reasons is

恩，其中一個原因是

when we write, we want to write our ideas clear and concise, meaning we don't want these long sentences,

我們寫作時，不會想要寫出冗長的句子，而是能清楚又準確地寫出我們的想法和意思

We want our sentences to be to the point.

我們想要我們的句子能簡而有力

"There are" adds extra words that are not needed.

使用「There are」只是加入了贅詞

So, let's look at some examples.

所以我們來看看幾個例句

a) There are many issues that students face at university.

a) 學生在大學中會面對到很多的問題

So, that's an okay sentence, but if I wanted to make it a better sentence,

所以這是個好的句子，但如果我想要把這句子變得更好的話

that is more appropriate for academic writing,

更適合學術寫作的話

I would change it. I'd get rid of "there are"

如果是我，我會刪掉「there are」

and I would say instead "Students face many issues at university."

我只會寫「Students face many issues at university.」就好

So, you don't need "there is" or "there are."

所以你們不需要用到「there is」或是「there are」

A second example

第二個例子是

"There are many development projects that the UN supports." Okay?

「聯合國支持了很多開發計畫」

Again, we don't need "there are."

再說一次，我們不需要用到「there are」

We can just change it to "The UN supports many development projects."

我們可以寫「The UN supports many development projects.」就好

By getting rid of "there is" and "there are"

刪掉「there is」和「there are」

your sentences become stronger, and to the point.

你們的句子會變得更簡短有力

So, tip number three, is

所以第三個技巧是

Avoid words

避免用到幾個字

So don't use words in academic writing such as "really, very, a lot,"

不要在專業寫作中用到幾個字，像是「really、very、a lot」

I'm gunna add another one, "so." Okay?

我還要再加一個，就是「so」

This weakens your writing.

這些字會弱化你們的寫作

Your writing isn't as strong if you use these types of words.

如果在你們的寫作用到這類的單字，力道就不那麼強了

So let's look at some examples.

我們來看看一些例句

"Many students think university is very hard."

「很多學生認為讀大學很難」

Ok, so now, we have "very."

所以這邊我們有「very」這個單字

How could I improve the sentence?

我要怎麼來改善這個句子呢？

Well, instead of using "very hard,"

恩，不要用「very hard」

Just use a stronger word in the first place. say, "Many students think university is difficult." Okay

就用一個較強的字眼就好，像是「Many students think university is difficult.」就好

Um...There are many cars...

這裡有很多車子...

Well, there, I just broke a rule. Sorry

恩，在這邊我犯了個錯誤（there are）

Many cars speed very fast, you get rid of the "very" in that sentence,

很多車子開得很快，你們省略掉句中的 very

Come up with a stronger word for it.

想一個比較強的單字

So, let's look at number B sentence B.

所以我們來看看 B 這個句子

Bill 399 is very...oh sorry is really controversial.

法案399是非常（very）...哦，不好意思，是非常（really）有爭議性的

So, again an academic writing avoid the usage of "really".

所以再提醒一次，在學術的寫作中，避免用到 really 「真的」這個單字

We get to say bill 399 is controversial.

我們可以說法案399是有爭議性的

The sentence sounds better it sounds more formal.

這句子聽起來更好了，更加正式的感覺

Here, C. a lot of the students...

再看看這個例句，有很多的學生...

I didn't finish the sentence, I could say "a lot of the students live on campus."

我沒有完整寫出一個句子，不過我可以說有很多的學生住在校園中

Instead of using "a lot,"

不用「a lot」這字

we could use the word "many students" so we use "many" if we can count the noun,

我們可以用「many」很多學生，所以我們可以用 many 來形容這個名詞

if it's countable.

只要它是可數名詞

Instead of using "a lot" use "many" or if our noun is not countable if it's a non-count noun.

不用「a lot」用「many」，或是如果是不可數名詞

We can use "much," get rid of "a lot." So instead of "a lot" of the students now we have "many" students.

我們可以「much」，不用「a lot」。所以不用「a lot of」學生，我們現在用的是「many」學生

Many students face problems in their first year of University.

很多學生在大學的第一年要面對很多問題

Much time is wasted because of procrastination. OK

因為拖延，所以很多時間都被浪費掉了

So, many and much are both words that are better to use than a lot and

所以「many」和「much」這兩個字會比「a lot」好，再來

again the rule is avoid the usage of really, very, a lot, and so.

要記得的規則是避免用到「really」、「very」、「a lot」、和「so 」

So, our fourth tip when it comes to academic writing is unless, so, if you are in the sciences

所以我們的第四個學術寫作技巧是，除非你們是科學方面的

It's ok to use the passive don't use it too much but it's it's okay and normal to use the passive voice and

可以用到被動式，但不要用太多，不過用到被動語氣沒關係

I'll explain what that is in a second.

我待會會解釋為什麼我會那樣說

But, if you are studying the humanities, social science, history, psychology,

但如果你們是念人文科、社會科學科、歷史、心理學

these types of subjects do not use the passive voice, use the active voice,

這幾類的學科不要用到被動語氣，用主動語氣

So for most university writing, we use the active voice,

所以在許多大學的寫作中，我們都用主動語氣

So, what is the passive voice and what is the active voice,

什麼是被動語氣以及什麼是主動語氣呢？

So, here is an example of the passive voice.

這邊有一個被動語氣的例句

Ｈealth care reforms were implemented by Obama.

醫療改革被歐巴馬總統執行了

Ok, so notice first we have a form of the verb "to be," and then we have the past participle of implement

看看這邊我們有一個動詞「to be」，然後在這裡我們有「implement」這個過去分詞

in this case implemented so you see an ed

「implement」後面加上一個 ed

and then oftentimes we have the word by someone. So, this is

我們常常會在後面接上「by」某人，所以這就是

an example of a passive voice sentence.

一個被動語氣的句子

Health care reforms were implemented by Obama.

醫療改革被歐巴馬總統執行了

So, what is the problem with using the passive voice.

所以用被動語氣會有什麼問題？

Well, it takes away the fact that Obama is the one who implemented the reforms.

恩，這樣的被動語氣會忽略掉歐巴馬就是那一位執行健康改革的人

the sentence is sort of weak a little bit awkward.

這樣的句子也會比較弱，會有點怪的

It would be much better if we had the actor who is Obama's, so the person, the verb, and the object.

我們能寫執行者歐巴馬、動詞、以及受詞這樣的排序會更好

Obama implemented health care reforms.

歐巴馬執行了健康改革

So, this is the active voice. OK

這個是主動語氣

So, if you can have the subject and the verb, then the object instead of the passive voice.

不用到被動語氣，是當你們有主詞、動詞、然後受詞

So, here is another example of this. If I wrote in the passive voice.

這邊我還有寫一個被動語氣的例句

I would write, the war was over, here we have the form of the be verb.

我這邊寫了這場戰爭結束了，這個句型是有 be 動詞

Won, here's the past participle of win, by another keyword, the French.

「Won」是過去分詞，「by」是另一個重點，然後是法國

The war was won by the French.

這場戰爭是被法國人贏了

So, this is again a passive voice sentence. It's a passive sentence

再一次的，這是一個被動語氣的句子

But, it's still a little bit weak. In academic writing, we want strong sentences and

這樣的句子是有點弱的。在學術寫作之中，我們想要強而有力的句子

a strong sentence has the actor or the person performing the action at the beginning of the sentence.

而一個強而有力的句子開頭會有一個執行者/一個人物執行一個動作

So, instead a better sentence would be the French won the war

所以一個更好的句子會是法國人贏了這場戰爭（the French+won+the war）

So, the final tip in this video is when you write academically use strong verbs.

在這影片的最後一個技巧是，當你們想要寫得有學術性時，使用有力的動詞

OK, so what is the strong verb and what is a weak verb?

所以什麼是有力的動詞、什麼又是弱的動詞？

So, I'm going to give you an example I could say he gave assistance to my friend.

這邊我會給你們一個例句，我會說他幫忙（gave assistance to）了我的朋友

Ok, this is a very weak way of saying he gave assistance to my friend, and a

這是一個非常弱的說法，他幫忙了我的朋友。而一個

stronger way I could instead just say he assisted my friend

較強的說法是，我就只要說他幫忙（assist）了我的朋友

So, what is the difference between these two sentences.

所以這兩個句子有什麼不同的地方呢？

Well, in this sentence assistance is a noun.

恩，在這個句子中，assistance 是名詞

So, a better way to write this sentence.

寫這個句子最好要記住一的方式

Anytime you have a verb a noun and you look at the noun and

每次你們都要有一個動詞、一個名詞，你們看看這個名詞

it could be its own verb. Use this in a verbal form instead.

這個名詞也有它的動詞型態，所以要用這一個動詞型態

So, for example he gave assistance should become he assisted

例如他幫助（gave assistance）應該要改成他幫助（assist）

Ok, so this is stronger.

所以這樣的句子會比較強而有力

Let's look at another example.

我們再來看看另一個例子

So, here I have a weak verb made an objection.

我用了一個較弱的動詞「異議 made an objection」

He made an objection. OK, so again we have a verb and then

他表示反對。再看一次，我們這邊有一個動詞和

a noun objection, but objection can be its own verb.

一個名詞「objection」，但這個「objection」也有自己的動詞型態

So, to make it stronger we get rid of made and

要讓這句子更有力，我們要刪掉「made」，並且

we turn objection into its verbal form objected. He objected.

把這個「objection」改成動詞型態「objected」。他反對

So, he objected is better than he made an objection.

所以「he objected」比「made an objection」好很多

Hey, another example here we have our example of the weak verb.

嘿！我們這裡還有另外一個弱動詞的例子

She conducted an investigation.

她執行一個調查（conduct an investigation）

She conducted an investigation. But, when I look here I see the word investigation.

她執行一個調查。但是我看到這個字「investigation」

And, I think does investigation does this noun have a verb form.

我想到「investigation」這個名詞有動詞形態

Well, yes it does, investigate.

對，這個字可以是「investiage」

So, instead of saying conduct an investigation.

所以不說執行一個調查（conduct an investigation）

She investigated something, a lot better, it's stronger

她執行（investigate）了某件事情，這句好很多，也比較強而有力

OK, finally, for the fourth example the weak verb, is did an audit.

最後，第四個弱的動詞做審核（do an audit）

They did an audit on Wesley Snipes. I don't know, for a joke maybe

他們在審核衛斯里·史奈普。我不知道，可能是在審核個笑話

They did an audit on someone.

他們在審核某個人

So, again, I see the word audit

我看到這個字「audit」

So, here's a verb and here's a noun.

這裡有一個動詞以及一個名詞

but look at this noun, and I think audit, is there a verb form of the word audit?

我現在看到這個，我想「audit」有動詞型態嗎？

Yes, there is Wesley Snipes was audited.

對，衛斯里·史奈普被審核

But again, I told you not to use the passive, so i could say

再提醒你們一次，我要你們不要用被動語氣，所以我可以說

the government audited Wesley Snipes

政府稽查了衛斯里·史奈普

Ok, so there you have it, five tips that will quickly improve your academic writing

好了，這邊你們有五個技巧，可以快速地幫助你們的學術寫作

So, if you would like to practice some of these tips

如果你們有想要練習這幾個技巧

come visit us at our website at www.engvid.com. Until next time.

來拜訪我們的網站 www.engvid.com。下次再見