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  • I was born and raised in North Korea.

    我在北韓出生長大。

  • Although my family constantly struggled against poverty,

    雖然我的家庭離不開貧窮

  • I was always loved and cared for first,

    但我仍然備受關愛,

  • because I was the only son

    因為我是家中的獨子

  • and the youngest of two in the family.

    也是兩個孩子中最小的。

  • But then the great famine began in 1994.

    但在94年,大飢荒開始了。

  • I was four years old.

    當時我四歲。

  • My sister and I would go searching for firewood

    我姊姊和我四處尋找柴火

  • starting at 5 in the morning

    從凌晨五點開始

  • and come back after midnight.

    一直到午夜才回家。

  • I would wander the streets searching for food,

    我為了尋找食物在路上遊蕩,

  • and I remember seeing a small child

    我曾看見一個綁在母親背上的嬰兒

  • tied to a mother's back eating chips,

    手上拿著洋芋片吃,

  • and wanting to steal them from him.

    當時我動了偷竊的念頭。

  • Hunger is humiliation. Hunger is hopelessness.

    飢餓讓人感到羞恥、感到絕望,

  • For a hungry child, politics and freedom

    對一個飢餓的孩子來說

  • are not even thought of.

    政治和自由是他想也沒想過的事。

  • On my ninth birthday, my parents

    在我九歲生日時,

  • couldn't give me any food to eat.

    我的雙親不能給我任何食物。

  • But even as a child, I could feel the heaviness

    但就算我還小,

  • in their hearts.

    我也能感受到他們內心的沈重。

  • Over a million North Koreans died of starvation in that time,

    當時北韓有上百萬人死於飢餓,

  • and in 2003, when I was 13 years old,

    2003年,我13歲,

  • my father became one of them.

    我的父親成為了他們之一。

  • I saw my father wither away and die.

    我親眼見到父親日漸衰弱,步向死亡。

  • In the same year, my mother disappeared one day,

    同年,我的母親離開了我們,

  • and then my sister told me

    我姊姊告訴我

  • that she was going to China to earn money,

    她去了中國賺錢,

  • but that she would return with money and food soon.

    她很快會帶著錢和食物回來。

  • Since we had never been separated,

    但我們從未試過分開,

  • and I thought we would be together forever,

    我一直以為我們會永遠在一起,

  • I didn't even give her a hug when she left.

    她離開時我甚至沒給她一個擁抱。

  • It was the biggest mistake I have ever made in my life.

    這是我此生犯下最大的錯誤。

  • But again, I didn't know

    然而,我又怎麼會知道

  • it was going to be a long goodbye.

    這會是個如此漫長的分別。

  • I have not seen my mom or my sister since then.

    從此以後我再也沒見過母親和姊姊。

  • Suddenly, I became an orphan and homeless.

    突然間,我成了無家可歸的孤兒。

  • My daily life became very hard,

    日常生活變得異常艱難。

  • but very simple.

    但也非常簡單。

  • My goal was to find a dusty piece of bread in the trash.

    目標是從垃圾中找出一片佈滿灰塵的麵包。

  • But that is no way to survive.

    但這仍難以維生。

  • I started to realize, begging would not be the solution.

    我逐漸明白,乞討也不能解決問題。

  • So I started to steal from food carts in illegal markets.

    我開始從黑市食物攤上偷竊。

  • Sometimes, I found small jobs

    有時我能靠著做一些小工

  • in exchange for food.

    換取食物。

  • Once, I even spent two months in the winter

    一次, 我在冬日的礦坑裡

  • working in a coal mine,

    連續工作了兩個月。

  • 33 meters underground without any protection

    在三十三公尺的地底,

  • for up to 16 hours a day.

    毫無遮蓋保護地連續工作十六個小時。

  • I was not uncommon.

    像我這樣的孩子很尋常。

  • Many other orphans survived this way, or worse.

    許多其他孤兒都和我一樣,甚至更差。

  • When I could not fall asleep from bitter cold

    當我在沁骨的寒冷或飢餓的痛楚中

  • or hunger pains,

    輾轉難眠時,

  • I hoped that, the next morning,

    我只希望,明日早晨,

  • my sister would come back to wake me up

    姊姊會帶著我最喜歡的食物

  • with my favorite food.

    出現在我面前叫醒我。

  • That hope kept me alive.

    這樣的希望,讓我活了下來。

  • I don't mean big, grand hope.

    這不是什麼弘遠偉大的希望。

  • I mean the kind of hope that made me believe

    而是那些相信下一個垃圾桶裡

  • that the next trash can had bread,

    我能找到一片麵包的希望,

  • even though it usually didn't.

    就算這希望如此渺茫。

  • But if I didn't believe it, I wouldn't even try,

    但若我不去相信,連嘗試也不嘗試,

  • and then I would die.

    那麼我面臨的就只有死亡。

  • Hope kept me alive.

    希望讓我得以存活。

  • Every day, I told myself,

    每天我都告訴自己,

  • no matter how hard things got,

    無論狀況如何艱困,

  • still I must live.

    我仍然要活著。

  • After three years of waiting for my sister's return,

    我這樣等待姊姊歸來,等了三年,

  • I decided to go to China to look for her myself.

    我決定親身去中國尋找她。

  • I realized

    我發現,

  • I couldn't survive much longer this way.

    我不能繼續這樣生存下去。

  • I knew the journey would be risky,

    我知道逃亡的路極其險惡,

  • but I would be risking my life either way.

    但不逃亡的下場也相差不遠。

  • I could die of starvation like my father in North Korea,

    我可以留在北韓像父親一樣死於飢餓,

  • or at least I could try for a better life

    或是我可以試著逃到中國

  • by escaping to China.

    為自己爭取更好的生活。

  • I had learned that many people tried to cross

    我聽說有很多人為了避免被發現而選擇在夜晚逃亡到中國。

  • the border to China in the nighttime to avoid being seen.

    我聽說有很多人為了避免被發現而選擇在夜晚逃亡到中國。

  • North Korean border guards often shoot and kill people

    駐守邊防的北韓士兵毋需批准

  • trying to cross the border without permission.

    就能隨意射殺那些嘗試跨越國界的逃亡者。

  • Chinese soldiers will catch

    中國士兵則會追捕

  • and send back North Koreans,

    並遣返逃亡的北韓人,

  • where they face severe punishment.

    讓他們面臨嚴峻的制裁。

  • I decided to cross during the day,

    我決定在光天化日下穿越邊境,

  • first because I was still a kid and scared of the dark,

    第一因為我還是個孩子,我怕黑,

  • second because I knew I was already taking a risk,

    第二因為我知道我反正是冒險,

  • and since not many people tried to cross during the day,

    既然在白天逃亡的人少,

  • I thought I might be able to cross

    我想或許我可以不被人發現

  • without being seen by anyone.

    成功逃亡。

  • I made it to China on February 15, 2006.

    我是在06年的二月十五日抵達中國的。

  • I was 16 years old.

    當時我十六歲。

  • I thought things in China would be easier,

    我以為在中國的生活會輕鬆些,

  • since there was more food.

    因為那裡有食物。

  • I thought more people would help me.

    我以為會有更多人幫助我。

  • But it was harder than living in North Korea,

    但結果是,我的生活比在北韓時更艱難,

  • because I was not free.

    因為我失去了人身自由。

  • I was always worried about being caught

    我總是擔心著我是否會被捉到

  • and sent back.

    然後被遣返。

  • By a miracle, some months later,

    幾個月後,奇蹟出現了,

  • I met someone who was running

    我遇見一個為北韓人

  • an underground shelter for North Koreans,

    準備了地下庇護所的人,

  • and was allowed to live there

    他收留了我

  • and eat regular meals for the first time in many years.

    在那裡,我吃到多年來的第一頓正餐。

  • Later that year, an activist helped me escape China

    同年,一位工作者幫助我離開中國,

  • and go to the United States as a refugee.

    以難民身份到了美國。

  • I went to America without knowing a word of English,

    抵達時,我一個英文字也不懂,

  • yet my social worker told me that I had to go to high school.

    負責我的社會工作者卻告訴我我必須上高中。

  • Even in North Korea, I was an F student.

    就算在北韓,我也時常不及格。

  • (Laughter)

    (笑聲‭)

  • And I barely finished elementary school.

    ‬連小學都畢業的很勉強。

  • And I remember I fought in school more than once a day.

    我記得我在學校時常打架。

  • Textbooks and the library were not my playground.

    課本和圖書館不是我的地盤。

  • My father tried very hard to motivate me into studying,

    父親曾努力地激勵我用功唸書,

  • but it didn't work.

    卻徒勞無功。

  • At one point, my father gave up on me.

    到了一個地步,我的父親終於放棄了。

  • He said, "You're not my son anymore."

    他說:“我再也不把你當兒子了。”

  • I was only 11 or 12, but it hurt me deeply.

    當時我不過十一二歲,這話卻深深刺傷了我

  • But nevertheless, my level of motivation

    始終,到他死前,

  • still didn't change before he died.

    我都沒有改變。

  • So in America, it was kind of ridiculous

    我連中學都沒有畢業

  • that they said I should go to high school.

    他們卻要我在美國上高中,

  • I didn't even go to middle school.

    這不是莫名其妙嗎?

  • I decided to go, just because they told me to,

    我還是去了,但只是因為他們要我這樣做,

  • without trying much.

    我沒怎麼放在心上。

  • But one day, I came home and my foster mother

    有一天,我回家

  • had made chicken wings for dinner.

    發現養母做了雞翅。

  • And during dinner, I wanted to have one more wing,

    晚餐時,我很想再多吃一隻雞翅

  • but I realized there were not enough for everyone,

    但卻發現不夠每個人吃,

  • so I decided against it.

    於是我就沒有要求。

  • When I looked down at my plate,

    但我的盤子裡卻出現了一隻雞翅,

  • I saw the last chicken wing, that my foster father had given me his.

    我養父把自己的份給了我。

  • I was so happy.

    我欣喜若狂。

  • I looked at him sitting next to me.

    我看著坐在我旁邊的他,

  • He just looked back at me very warmly,

    他只是默默地看著我,

  • but said no words.

    眼神中的溫暖不言而喻。

  • Suddenly I remembered my biological father.

    我突然想起我的生父。

  • My foster father's small act of love

    養父的簡單的愛的舉止

  • reminded me of my father,

    讓我想到了我自己的父親,

  • who would love to share his food with me

    那就算在極端的飢餓中,

  • when he was hungry, even if he was starving.

    也仍然把食物給我的父親。

  • I felt so suffocated that I had so much food in America,

    我突然為我在美國的飽足感到窒息,

  • yet my father died of starvation.

    我的父親死於飢餓啊。

  • My only wish that night was to cook a meal for him,

    當晚我只有一個心願,

  • and that night I also thought of what else I could do

    就是能為他煮一餐好吃的方法

  • to honor him.

    同時想著其他能榮耀他的。

  • And my answer was to promise to myself

    我想出的答案是

  • that I would study hard and get the best education

    要自己努力讀書,在美國力爭上游

  • in America to honor his sacrifice.

    以榮耀他的為我所作的犧牲。

  • I took school seriously,

    我努力用功,

  • and for the first time ever in my life,

    人生中第一次,

  • I received an academic award for excellence,

    得到了學業優異的獎勵,

  • and made dean's list from the first semester in high school.

    第一學期末,我拿到了院長獎。

  • (Applause)

    (掌聲)

  • That chicken wing changed my life.

    一隻雞翅改變了我的生命。

  • (Laughter)

    (笑聲)

  • Hope is personal. Hope is something

    希望是獨有的。希望是一種

  • that no one can give to you.

    別人不能給你的東西。

  • You have to choose to believe in hope.

    想要懷有希望,

  • You have to make it yourself.

    你必須自己做出決定。

  • In North Korea, I made it myself.

    在北韓,我自己做了決定。

  • Hope brought me to America.

    是希望帶我來到美國。

  • But in America, I didn't know what to do,

    但我不知道我在美國能做什麼,

  • because I had this overwhelming freedom.

    因為自由無邊無際。

  • My foster father at that dinner gave me a direction,

    我的養父那夜在餐桌上,為我指引方向,

  • and he motivated me and gave me a purpose

    我有了活在美國的

  • to live in America.

    動力和目標。

  • I did not come here by myself.

    我不是靠自己來到這裡的。

  • I had hope, but hope by itself is not enough.

    我有希望,但單有希望是不夠的。

  • Many people helped me along the way to get here.

    靠著許多人的幫助,我才能來到這裡。

  • North Koreans are fighting hard to survive.

    北韓人正努力地求生。

  • They have to force themselves to survive,

    他們必須逼著自己活下來,

  • have hope to survive,

    懷抱存活的希望,

  • but they cannot make it without help.

    但他們不能只靠自己,孤身無援。

  • This is my message to you.

    這就是我今天想告訴你們的。

  • Have hope for yourself,

    懷抱希望,

  • but also help each other.

    彼此幫助。

  • Life can be hard for everyone, wherever you live.

    生活對每個人來說都有其艱難,無論你身在何方。

  • My foster father didn't intend to change my life.

    養父沒有刻意要改變我的生命。

  • In the same way, you may also change someone's life

    相同的,你一個極微小的愛的舉止

  • with even the smallest act of love.

    也可能改變他人的一生。

  • A piece of bread can satisfy your hunger,

    一片麵包能充飢,

  • and having the hope will bring you bread

    懷抱希望

  • to keep you alive.

    則能救命。

  • But I confidently believe that

    我真心相信

  • your act of love and caring

    你的愛與關懷

  • can also save another Joseph's life

    可以拯救另一個約瑟的生命

  • and change thousands of other Josephs

    讓無數個仍然懷抱希望的約瑟

  • who are still having hope to survive.

    有機會生存下來。

  • Thank you.

    感謝各位。

  • (Applause)

    (掌聲)

  • Adrian Hong: Joseph, thank you for sharing

    Adrian Hong: 約瑟,謝謝你分享

  • that very personal and special story with us.

    這段屬於你個人的特別旅程。

  • I know you haven't seen your sister for, you said,

    我知道你已經有十年,

  • it was almost exactly a decade,

    不曾見到姊姊。

  • and in the off chance that she may be able to see this,

    我們想你藉著這個機會,

  • we wanted to give you an opportunity

    對她說話,

  • to send her a message.

    或許她有天會看見。

  • Joseph Kim: In Korean?

    Joseph Kim:用韓文嗎?

  • AH: You can do English, then Korean as well.

    AH: 先用英文,再用韓文也行。

  • (Laughter)

    (笑聲)

  • JK: Okay, I'm not going to make it any longer in Korean

    JK: 我就不用韓文了

  • because I don't think I can make it

    我想那樣我無法阻止自己

  • without tearing up.

    想哭的衝動。

  • Nuna, it has been already 10 years

    姊,已經十年了

  • that I haven’t seen you.

    我們十年沒見面了。

  • I just wanted to say

    我只想說,

  • that I miss you, and I love you,

    我想你,我愛你。

  • and please come back to me and stay alive.

    請你回到我身邊,好好活著。

  • And I -- oh, gosh.

    我‭ ‬–‭ ‬天啊。

  • I still haven't given up my hope to see you.

    我還沒有放棄有天能見到你的希望。

  • I will live my life happily

    我會快樂的活著,

  • and study hard

    努力唸書,

  • until I see you,

    直到我們再見的那天。

  • and I promise I will not cry again.

    我也保證我不會再哭了。

  • (Laughter)

    (笑聲)

  • Yes, I'm just looking forward to seeing you,

    是的,我期待見到你,

  • and if you can't find me,

    如果你找不到我,

  • I will also look for you,

    我也會努力找你,

  • and I hope to see you one day.

    我希望有天能再見你。

  • And can I also make a small message to my mom?

    我可以和我媽說句話嗎?

  • AH: Sure, please.

    AH: 當然,請。

  • JK: I haven't spent much time with you,

    JK:‭ ‬我們相處的機會不多,

  • but I know that you still love me,

    但我知道你還愛我,

  • and you probably still pray for me

    為我禱告,

  • and think about me.

    和思念我。

  • I just wanted to say thank you

    我只想說聲謝謝

  • for letting me be in this world.

    帶我來到這個世界。

  • Thank you.

    謝謝你。

  • (Applause)

    (掌聲)

I was born and raised in North Korea.

我在北韓出生長大。

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A2 初級 中文 TED 北韓 中國 姊姊 父親 雞翅

【TED】Joseph Kim:我在北韓失去的家庭。和我得到的另一個家庭。The family I lost in North Korea. And the family I gained.

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    VoiceTube 發佈於 2013 年 06 月 21 日
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