Placeholder Image

字幕列表 影片播放

  • Hey, guys! So I watch a lot of scary movies now,

  • and, honestly, I used to hate them when I was younger.

  • But now then I started making videos and realized how fake they are.

  • Now I actually enjoy them, but I'm not gonna lie.

  • In the back of my mind, whenever I'm watching horror movies,

  • I want to get scared, but I'm thinking of all these other random scenarios

  • of how the movie could've went instead.

  • Just like every single October, I go on a horror movie watching spree.

  • Horror, not whore. HOR-ROR.

  • Hodor. (deep voice) Hodor.

  • But the majority of the time, I kinda just ruin the movie for myself

  • 'cause instead of just sitting there and falling into the story

  • of the movie, I'm always looking for other things.

  • How did they make that? How did they do that effect?

  • Who made those costumes? I wonder how long that person

  • had to sit in makeup. I bet this was going to happen.

  • I still don't know what the fox says!

  • But the thing that ruins it the most for me is that when I'm watching

  • these movies, I'm always thinking of other scenarios

  • of how the movie could've went. And because I've been watching

  • so many horror movies lately, I've been jotting all these ideas down

  • on my phone, and that's why this video was created.

  • So for all of you who watch horror movies, I'm sorry, I don't mean to ruin

  • the movie for you guys.

  • But on the bright side, for all of you people who hate

  • scary movies and can't watch them, hopefully you can watch this video

  • and it'll ruin the horror movies for you the same way it does for me.

  • So with that being said, this is what horror movies would be like

  • if they weren't scary.

  • Mwahahahaha!

  • (high-pitched laugh)

  • ♪ (scary music) ♪

  • ♪ (upbeat reggae) ♪

  • (thunder rumbles)

  • (screaming)

  • You'll never stop me!

  • - Begone, demon! - Give me back my daughter!

  • Your daughter's already gone!

  • You are not welcome in this realm!

  • Begone, demon! Leave this girl alone!

  • You'll never get rid of me, you filthy priest!

  • (growling)

  • By the name of God, and/or any other religion that you believe in,

  • because we respect other people's religion and do not judge...

  • By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you

  • husband and wiiiiiiiife!

  • (room grows quiet)

  • Sorry, I kinda spilled a little bit on the bed.

  • Wait, do that again.

  • (shrieking)

  • I think she's weakened by water.

  • Huh. Well, whaddya know!

  • All those deaths could've been avoided if we just used water.

  • (demon continues shrieking)

  • ♪ (cheerful music) ♪

  • (laughter)

  • (shrieking)

  • Hold on, this is taking too long. I have a really good idea.

  • - What? - Remember that one trend we were gonna do?

  • (gasping)

  • (groaning)

  • Hey, whazzup? It's your boy, the priest,

  • and we got the demon right here, who volunteered to do the ALS

  • Ice Bucket Challenge. So here we go.

  • ♪ (upbeat reggae) ♪

  • (saw buzzes)

  • (gun shot)

  • Ow! What was that?

  • - See? - Oooh!

  • It hurts, huh?

  • This is Texas. Everybody has a gun.

  • It's time to upgrade, man.

  • (groaning)

  • ♪ (upbeat reggae) ♪

  • They say after you watch this tape, someone calls your house and says,

  • "Seven days."

  • Then a little girl crawls out of your TV and kills you seven days later.

  • ♪ (ominous music) ♪

  • Gotta be really honest with you...

  • this entire legend sounds really outdated.

  • You said I have to watch this tape. How am I gonna do that?

  • I don't have a VCR. Nobody watches tapes anymore.

  • This little girl needs to upgrade to a DVD, or at least a Blu-ray.

  • And you said somebody's gonna call my house?

  • Nobody can call my house. I don't have a landline.

  • If anything, she would have to call my cellphone, and I'm not gonna

  • answer some random phone number! And then you said she's gonna

  • crawl out of my TV. Nobody watches TV anymore!

  • Maybe if she crawled out of my laptop. And that's a 15 inch screen

  • she would have to crawl through. She would have to be really small.

  • If a girl that small were to kill me--

  • Ow! What the hell, dude?!

  • There. Ebola. Now you really have seven days.

  • I don't know why I even told you.

  • (mutters angrily)

  • ♪ (upbeat reggae) ♪

  • (panting)

  • ♪ (ominous music) ♪

  • (gasps)

  • Hmm.

  • Hmm.

  • - (snaps camera) - Hmm.

  • (shutter clicks repeatedly)

  • ♪ (whimsical music) ♪

  • ♪ (upbeat reggae) ♪

  • (whimpering)

  • (monster groans)

  • Oh...my...god!

  • You're aca-perfect!

  • Guys, I am telling you. She's gonna be perfect for the bass.

  • But is she pitch perfect material?

  • Show 'em.

  • (low pitched groan)

  • Whoa!

  • That is deep!

  • - What'd I tell you? - Impressive.

  • - Nice. - Dubstep routine on one.

  • Five, six, seven, eight.

  • ♪ (dubstepping) ♪

  • ♪ (upbeat reggae) ♪

  • (birds chirp)

  • - (baaing) - Shut up! Shhh. Shh. Shhh. Shhhh.

  • ♪ (upbeat reggae) ♪

  • I don't know how to put this.

  • I don't believe your son is actually in a coma.

  • I don't understand. We moved,

  • and these things keep happening! Why do they keep following us?

  • Because it's not the house that's haunted.

  • It's your son.

  • ♪ (ominous music) ♪

  • (snoring)

  • There we go.

  • What? You heard him. There's nothing we could've done.

  • He was insidious.

  • But now he's outsidious.

  • (panned laughter)

  • ♪ (upbeat reggae) ♪

  • Spirit of the realm...

  • are there any of you with us right now?

  • It says, "Ye."

  • Can you show us a sign that you're here?

  • (gasping)

  • ♪ (mystic chanting) ♪

  • Maybe it was...maybe it was the wind.

  • Can you show us another sign that you're here?

  • ♪ (mystic chanting) ♪

  • I told you.

  • Why do they keep coming to me?

  • I think it...I think it likes you!

  • - Heh. - What? No, you guys don't know that for sure.

  • Come on, man. The chocolate and the roses?

  • - It does like you. - You think so?

  • Aw, look, he's blushing. (chuckles)

  • I mean...I...

  • ♪ (romantic music) ♪

  • And that was the first time we met.

  • I couldn't take my eyes off her because, well,

  • they were never on her.

  • But even though I couldn't see her, I knew...I had to see her again.

  • Ugh.

  • (Nigahiga sighs heavily)

  • You're...

  • even more beautiful than I could've ever imagined.

  • (gasps)

  • ♪ (romantic music) ♪

  • (gasps)

  • (panting)

  • (groans) What a crazy nightmare.

  • Thank god it's over, though.

  • (raspy voice) Or is it?

  • (gasps)

  • (frantic breathing)

  • Oh man.

  • This is really starting to get craz--

  • (low pitched groaning)

  • (gasps)

  • (gasping continues)

  • - Eee! - (gasps)

  • - (gasping) - ♪ (dubstep beat) ♪

  • (bleating)

  • Are you sure she's pitch-perfect material?

  • - ♪ (dubstep) ♪ - Oh, that is deep.

  • Yeah, that got weird fast.

  • And that last one about the Ouija board, that was just based off the trailer

  • that they're playing on the TV all the time now.

  • On the--I said on the TV. I sound like a 60 year old man.

  • They play that on the TV, right?

  • It's getting even weirder! I'm just gonna stop while I'm ahead.

  • I'm not ahead. I'm behind!

  • But thank you guys, again, so much for watching.

  • I hope you guys have a very happy and safe Halloween.

  • And for once, in my YouTube life, on a Halloween related video,

  • I'm not gonna put up one of those scary, loud images.

  • You know, that scares the crap out of you guys in three, two, one.

  • Like I said, I'm not gonna do it.

  • For once.

  • Which is weird.

  • (dead air)

  • It's actually even more scary, I think, that I'm not doing that,

  • 'cause it's like, "What is he gonna do?"

  • You know?

  • (sighs)

  • Teehee!

  • So thank you guys so much for watching. If you wanna see...

  • (shrieking)

  • ..bloopers and behind-the-scenes, click the one on the left.

  • If you want to see last week's video, click the one on the right.

  • And if you want to see anything that's Halloween related,

  • there's no place else to click, so just click one of those.

  • - Ha ha. - (low pitched groan)

  • - And remember-- - (low pitch groan)

  • Shut up, Derek!

Hey, guys! So I watch a lot of scary movies now,

字幕與單字

影片操作 你可以在這邊進行「影片」的調整,以及「字幕」的顯示

B1 中級

如果恐怖電影不可怕! (If Horror Movies Weren't Scary!)

  • 94 7
    丁言 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
影片單字