So today, I'm gonna be talking about the most annoying types of friends.

今天要討論的是幾個讓人崩潰的朋友類型

And I know that sounds really bad, because you are calling your friends annoying.

我知道說自己的朋友很煩不太好

But let's be real for a second.

但現在來坦白說吧

Every single friend of yours probably does at least one thing that annoys you, but,

你每個朋友都可能做出讓你覺得很崩潰的舉動，但是

You just look past it because, well, they're your friend.

你可能會忽略它，因為嘛，你們是朋友

Either that, or you haven't been friends long enough to see those traits come out,

要不然，就是你們不夠熟所以還沒看到他們的本性顯露

Or, well, you don't have any friends.

或者是你根本沒有朋友

Annoying Ryan: You would know a lot about that, huh?

煩人的萊恩：這你很清楚齁

Ryan : What?

萊恩：你是啥意思

You act like you have friends.

你假裝有朋友啊

What are you talking about? I have friends.

你在說什麼阿，我有好不好

Yeah, that's why you are talking to me right now.

噢是嗎，但你在跟我講話啊（註：暗諷萊恩沒朋友，只能跟自己的分身說話）

You talked to me first. That's why I'm talking to you.

是你先找我講話的，所以我才回應你

Yeah, but technically I am you, so you talked to you first.

但技術上來說，我是你的分身阿，所以我先跟你說話也不奇怪

Why are you here?

你到底在這幹嘛？（還不快滾）

I'm annoying Ryan. I'm here to help with this video since you have no friends.

我是煩人的萊恩啊，我是來幫你的誰叫你沒朋友

I have friends!

我有朋友啦

Yeah, but you only have Season 2.

但是你只有第二季（註：本尊說自己有很多朋友，但煩人的萊恩用雙關說他只有六人行《Friends》的第二季一片，沒有很多片）

Look. If you're gonna help, can you at least wait until we get to the examples?

聽我說，你想要幫忙的話也至少等我等一下舉例時再出現

I'm sorry, I thought we already started. Is this not the first example?

抱歉喔，我以為已經開始了。這不是第一種煩人的朋友嗎

Is this not not the whiny, annoying vlogger friend?

這不是愛抱怨、惱人的 vlogger 朋友嗎

Anyway,

反正呢

As I was saying until I so rudely interrupted myself...

直到我被我自己粗魯地打斷，我剛剛說

I love my friends and I'm sure you guys love all of yours.

我愛我的好友們，我相信你們也是

That's why we call them "friends,"

這也是我們為甚麼將他們稱作朋友

But there's no such thing as a friend that's never annoying.

但要一個朋友從不會讓你崩潰也不可能

There's just friends that are significantly less annoying than others.

只有那種跟其他人比較起來不太煩的朋友

And today, we're going to be talking about those others.

而今天，我們就要來好好說說那些好煩的朋友

Here are the most annoying types of friends.

以下是最常讓人崩潰的幾種朋友

Take a look.

看看吧

This is one of the most relatable, common ones there is. The bailor.

這是大家都能體會、最常見的。最後關頭喊停退出者

We all have that one friend who says they're always down to do stuff, and then they make plans with you,

我們都有那種朋友，宣稱自己很想做某件事，還和你一起計畫

And at the very last second, they tell you that they can't go, or they bail.

然後在最後一刻，他們跟你說：我沒辦法去了或老子不幹了

Hence, the bailer.

也就是，最後關頭喊停退出者

Oh, hey Greg. You want to go to the gym in a little bit?

嘿葛雷格，想去下健身房嗎

Yeah, let me just get ready.

好喔，等我準備一下

Alright, I'm good. You ready?

哥好啦，你呢

Oh, my bad, dude. I-I can't go anymore- I can't make it.

老兄，抱歉。我不能去啦，我有事

I have a- doctor's thing- appointment- conference.

我要去看醫生，呃，開會

The judger. Just like it says in the title,

愛亂下評斷者。就像標題說的

This is the friend that literally judges you for everything that you do.

這就是那種你做什麼他都要評論的那種朋友

Alright, see you later, man.

好的，等下見

Woo- Seriously? You're gonna wear that on a date?

喔喔，你認真？你去約會穿這樣？

What's wrong with it?

怎麼了嗎

I mean, it's cool- I mean, it looks a little polka-dotty, though.

我是說，那衣服不錯，只是看起來好多點點喔

Dude, you should not be eating those. Those are so bad for you.

老兄，你不該吃那個，對你身體不好

Wait? Are you liking her photo? You just met her. That's so desperate.

等等，你在按他照片讚嗎？你才剛認識他耶，這樣讓人覺得你很飢渴

The passive aggressive friend. This is one of the most annoying types of friends in my opinion.

假後退真進攻者。我個人覺得這種最煩

They never, ever tell you exactly what they want to say or what they want to do.

他們就是從來不會告訴你他們其實想說什麼或做甚麼

They just hint at it so that you don't look like the bad guy, and they put it on you.

他們會稍微暗示你，不把你直接當作壞人但是其實默默貼標籤

Alright so who's driving?

好喔，現在誰要開車

I can't cause my car's in the shop, so...

我不能，因為我的車在店裡

I can, I can. I did drink a little.

我可以啦，但我有喝點酒

So I mean, like, if you don't mind driving a little bit drunk. It's fine.

所以我的意思是，如果你們不介意我有點酒駕的話，沒關係的

Oh, I do have shoe boxes in the back

我後座還有放鞋盒

That's kinda taking up some space

可能佔不少空間

So it's probably gonna be really uncomfortable for three people

所以我們三人坐進去可能會很擠

But it's cool because I could just throw my shoes out in the trash. I don't need them.

但沒差啦，我可以就把我的鞋們丟到垃圾桶讓你們坐，我不需要那些鞋子

I don't need shoes. I have slippers.

我不需要那些鞋子，我有拖鞋

Even though that's really not safe for my workplace.

即使穿拖鞋上班可能很危險就是

You know as long as you guys don't block my rearview mirror cause, you know, I can't see at night.

只要你們不會擋住我的後照鏡，你們知道，我晚上看不太清楚

And I can't drive-oh it's day.

我晚上開不了，噢，是白天阿

I can't see during the day very well.

我白天也看不是很清楚

Ok, fine. I'll drive.

好啦，我來開

No it's cool. I can drive

不沒關係，我可以開

No, It's fine.

沒關係

I mean I can drive. As long as you guys-

我說我可以開阿，只要你們

I'll drive! Ok?

我來開啦！好不好！

Let's just go

走啦

Sure if that's what you want to do.

好喔，這可是你說的

The lagger. Again, another common one.

拖拉大王。同樣超常見。

I mean these friends pretty much speak a different language when it comes to time.

這些朋友在時間問題上，好像都在說別的星球語言

You just have to translate it.

你需要去解讀它的含意

For example:

像是

When a Lagger says that they're 'leaving soon'

當他說，他們準備離開

It means they haven't even started to get ready yet.

其實他們根本還沒準備離開

When they say they're on my way

當他們說他們在路上

That means I'm on my way to get ready but I'm still 30 minutes from leaving

其實是他們有要準備出門，但是是三十分鐘後

When they say 'I'm here!'

當他們說到囉

That means they're 5-10 minutes away.

其實明明還差五到十分鐘才到

And then when the Lagger says 'I can't seem to find you. Where are you?'

當他們說，都找不到你，問你在哪

That means they literally just showed up at that second.

其實他們才剛出現

The overly sensitive friend. This is the friend that takes every little thing so personally that-

過度纖細敏感者。這是那種總是把小事往心裡想的朋友

it get's to the point where you have to be careful what you say around them-

敏感到你跟他們說話時都要超級謹慎

and what you do around them since you don't want to offend them.

還有你的舉動，因為你不想觸犯他們幼小心靈

Oh, wow.

哇嗚~

What?

怎了

TFTI.

TFTI

TFTI?

TFTI啥？

Thanks for the invite.

謝謝你們邀請我的縮寫（你們沒問我要不要去）

Oh, I mean, I was already with Derrick and we just passed by this Greek food place

喔，我剛剛已經跟德雷克在一塊，我們經過這希臘美食餐廳

Oh, so you guys were already hanging out without me. That's cool.

喔，所以你們剛剛早就出去，沒有揪我。好啊沒關係

I thought you don't even like Greek?

我記得你根本不喜歡希臘菜

Why? Because I'm Asian? So I only eat Asian food?

為何？因為我是亞洲人所以我只能吃亞洲食物？

What? I'm Asian too!

蛤？我也是亞洲人阿

Wow. So you're saying I'm unoriginal

齁，所以你意思是我不是純亞洲人

I didn't say that.

我哪有說

And now you're calling me a liar.

現在又說我是騙人精

Look, Ok. It's not a big deal. We'll just drive back to the same Greek food place,

聽好，這只是小事。我們現在就開去剛剛那間希臘餐廳

Get the same exact meal so you don't feel left out. Is that OK?

買一樣的食物，讓你不會覺得被排擠。好嗎

Naw, I'm good.

唉唷，沒關係

What? What else do you want then?

蛤？不然你想吃什麼

I just don't wanna go.

我就是不想去而已

Why?

為何

I already ate.

我已經吃飽了

The ditcher. When a hot girl or guy comes along, this is the friend that just chases after them.

拋棄隊友者。當有辣妹或猛男在旁，這種朋友馬上追過去

They disappear. And completely seem to forget about you and your friends.

他們消失，然後完全忘記你和其他好友的存在

*singing* Happy birthday to you-

唱生日快樂歌

Wait. Where'd Ryan go?

等下，萊恩人呢

Yeah, it's my birthday today

恩亨，今天是我生日

Oh! Happy birthday!

噢，生日快樂

The photographer. I guess this one isn't really annoying to a lot of you guys but this is really annoying to me

到哪裡就拍拍拍者。也許這不是每個人都覺得崩潰的，但對我來說是我的地雷

This is the person that has to take a picture of every single little thing that you and your friends do.

這種人就是大夥做的小事都要拍下來

To them, it needs to be broadcasted or it didn't happen.

對他們來說，沒有紀錄宣揚放送就等於事情沒發生

*camera sound*

快門聲

*camera sound*

快門聲

*camera sound*

快門聲

*camera sound*

快門聲

The cheap friend. This is the one friend in the group that never pays for anything.

不付錢的賤友。這種朋友在小圈圈裡從不付錢

Hey, I'll be right back. I gotta- I gotta go to the bathroom real quick.

嘿，我等等回來。我要去上一下廁所很快

Alright, and your friend over there said that you guys are paying together?

好喔，剛剛你們的朋友說你們其他人要付錢

The overly competitive friend. This is the friend the you never wanna play games with because they always get way too competitive.

好勝心強者。你不會想跟他們玩遊戲因為他們只想贏

Oh, that's- that's a scratch, right there.

喔，被我抓到了吧，你擦到球了，那邊

My bad, dude.

兄弟，只是我的失誤

You just hit it. You just hit the ball.

你剛剛碰到球了

Like, are you serious?

蛤，你是認真的？

No it's cool. Like, if you want a handicap, I'll give you a handicap.

沒關係，如果你想要（初學者用的）輔助器，我給你就是了

Look, take it easy man. It's cool. It's your turn, go for it.

嘿，放鬆點。沒事，換你了，上吧

No, no. Go ahead. Just go ahead. You need the help so, we don't need to play by the real rules

不不，你繼續，你需要我放水幫你嘛，我們不需要專業的玩

We can play by your rules. We can play by your dumbass rules. It's fine.

我們可以照你的規則來，你的白痴規則，沒差

The checkout this video friend. I need a better title for that one.

總是叫你看影片者。我可能需要下好點的稱呼

This is the one friend that always wants to show you a video that he or she thinks is so funny

這是那種朋友，老愛秀給你看他覺得好笑的影片

or cool or awesome. Even though they're not that funny or cool or awesome

或者很酷或超棒的影片。即使它們上述都不符合

You see that twist?

你看這轉折

So good right?

讚吧

Right?

讚吧

Right?

讚吧

Right?

讚吧

The overly honest friend. And last but not least you never want a lying friend.

太過老實者。最後最後，任誰都不想要一個總是說謊的朋友吧

That's like one of the top things you don't want in a friend.

那是你最最不想要的好友類型

But sometimes the 'Overly-Honest Friend' can actually be a lot more annoying.

但事實上，有時候太過老實的好友反而也很討人厭

For example:

像是

You see that twist? So good, right?

看到那轉折了嘛？很棒對吧

Right?

對吧

Right?

對吧

Right?

對吧

This video sucked.

這超爛

Oh.

喔

Because sometimes it's better to lie to a friend then to actually hurt them.

有時候撒點小謊，比起傷害朋友好多了

This video sucked.

這影片超爛

Oh.

喔

But I guess there's a good ending to it.

但我覺得阿，它至少有個好的結局

And it doesn't end awkwardly.

而且不會收得很尷尬

And, again, I didn't make this video to call out friends of mine.

再次聲明，我沒有說我的朋友都是以上這些人

Nor do I think you should send this to your annoying friends

我也不建議你們把這影片貼給你的好友讓他們對號入座

Because that will probably result in you having less friends.

因為這可能會讓你落到沒朋友的下場

It's actually the opposite.

但其實是相反

When I made this list, I actually realized that I do a lot of these annoying traits (things)

我在列這些清單下來時，我發現我其實也會做這些事或有這些特質

I mean, when you watch this video I'm sure you guys pin pointed which one of your friends is this.

當你在看這部，我敢說你們一定也替朋友們貼上這些標籤

And which one of your friends is that.

還有哪些是哪種

But, sometimes we forget to look at ourselves

只是有時候我們忘了反省自己

If you haven't already, you should rewatch this video and instead of thinking about all your different friends

如果你還沒，重看一次，開始想想你的各種好友

that these apply to, think about yourself.

是哪種類型，也想想自己

Cause if there's something a friend does that really annoys you, chances are,

因為如果有朋友做出讓你崩潰的事，很有可能

you do something that really annoys that friend as well.

你也有做出同樣舉動

Because there is no such thing as a perfect friend.

世界上沒有十全十美的朋友

Which also means that your not the perfect friend either.

也就是說，你也不是

And in order to preserve that friendship we have to learn to just accept these annoying traits

為了珍藏友誼，我們該學著包容這些惹人煩的特質

And realize that no friend is really-

然後認清，沒有一個朋友是真的

Again, how would you know? You have no friends.

我再說一次，你沒朋友又怎知道這些大道理

I have friends! Ok? Just because I'm talking to an annoying, imaginary one it doesn't mean-

我有好不好？就因為我在跟討人厭、想像的分身說話不代表

Oh, I'm not imaginary.

喔，我可不是想像的喔

What?

蛤？

You still don't get it, huh?

你還不明白對吧

Get what?

明白啥？

You see how annoying I am to you?

你發現我有多討人厭了吧

Yes! You are incredibly annoying.

對！你超讓我崩潰

Which is why you named me Annoying Ryan.

這也是為何你稱我作討人厭萊恩

I didn't call you that. You called yourself that.

我沒這麼說你。是你自己說的

Exactly.

確實

I called myself that.

我自己說的

And I...

而我

am you.

是你

I've been annoying all along.

原來我一直都很煩

NOOOOOO!

不

You see that twist?

你看這轉折

So good right?

讚吧

Right?

對吧

Right?

對吧

Right?

對吧

This video sucked.

這影片好鳥

Oh.

喔

But I guess there's a good ending to it and it doesn't end awkwardly.

但我想，它至少有個好結局所以不會有尷尬結尾

*chewing noises*

嚼東西聲

You know that really bad for you, right?

你知道那真的對你身體不好吧

*end slide music*

片尾音樂