So the other day, I got really offended because some people told me that I wasn't manly enough.

有一天，一些人說我不夠男人，讓我真的有點惱怒。

I'm not gonna lie, that hurt me a little, because honestly, I totally don't see it.

坦白講，這真的讓我很難過，因為我不了解為何他們這麼說。

Me? Not manly? Psh, you're joking, right?

我不夠男人?你一定是在開玩笑，對吧?

"Jeffrey, do you know where's the...?"

「Jeffrey，你知道...?」

"What?"

「怎麼了?」

Okay look, we're in the middle of winter and my skin's been needing some moisturizing lately.

好，聽著!現在正值冬天，我很需要做皮膚保濕。

As a matter of fact, I just bought some new lotion, for, for my hands obviously.

事實上，我才剛買了新的乳液。當然是為了我寶貴的手。

Mm... What? Don't judge me.

幹嘛?不要對我指指點點。

Besides, in part, I'm trynna have smooth skin for the ladies 'cause you know, I've never heard them say they like the opposite.

此外，一部分原因我是為了有女朋友而保養手，因為我從沒聽過有女生喜歡手粗的男生。

"Wow, you have really dry skin. That's so hot."

「哇，你的手好粗糙，好性感~」

"Yeah? You like that?"

「歐，你喜歡?」

"Yeah, can I peel it off for you?"

「非常喜歡，我可以幫你把他們剝掉嗎?」

"Sure."

「樂意之致!」

No, that never happens.

這永遠不會發生。

Okay, fine, you know what, I admit it.

好吧，我承認，

Not all the things that I do would be considered really "manly", but screw it.

不是所有我做的大家認為是男人會做的事，但誰管他!

I'm not getting hurt from it anymore.

我不會再因此受傷了。

So what if sometimes at home as a man, I decide to pee sitting down.

身為男人，如果有時在家，我想坐下來上小號呢?

Truth is, it saves a lot of trouble if you ask me.

事實是，這省去了很多麻煩。

Yeah, my mom doesn't really like that.

我媽肯定不喜歡這樣。

Also, peeing sitting down has a big advantage.

坐著上廁所還有一個很棒的優點。

Like, it's the only time for me to finally say that I can truly, multitask.

這是唯一我可以同時處理多項事務的時間。

"Nah, I'm just ironing my clothes for tonight."

「沒啦，我在燙今晚的襯衫。」

I think I can send this file right now. Don't worry about it."

「我可以現在寄這個檔案，別擔心。」

"sending in 3, 2, send."

「在三、二，寄出!」

"You're welcome."

「不客氣!」

"So how's your life?"

「你過得如何?」

You see?

看到沒?

Trust me guys, I'm pretty sure that's how girls develop these multitasking abilities, for all these centuries.

相信我，這就是幾世紀來女生們怎麼培養出多任務能力。

We, we have some catching up to do.

我們男生可差得遠了！。

Also, as a man, I don't really shave.

但我其實不太刮鬍子。

And it's not like I don't want to.

這並非我不想要，

I just don't really have facial hair.

而是我臉上根本沒有什麼毛。

Now that I think about it, the closest that I've ever gotten to that, is tweezing my eyebrows.

現在想想，唯一有關的是修眉毛。

A few months ago, a friend of mine told me that my eyebrows wasn't on, wasn't on "fleek", so she decided to tweeze them.

幾個月前，我朋友說我的眉毛不夠完美，然後她決定幫我修一修。

And since then, the hair just grows thicker and faster, every single day.

之後，我的眉毛更粗且越長越快。

"Bro, we gotta go, what's taking you so long?"

「兄弟，要出門了。你在做什麼，需要這麼久的時間?」

"I'm tweezing my eyebrows."

「我在修眉毛。」

"Are you serious?"

「你不是在開玩笑吧?」

"You already tweezed them yesterday, who cares..."

「你不是昨天才修過，誰會在乎?」

"Look, I'm almost done."

「你看，我快完成了......

"...I think."

「可能吧...」

"Yeah, I'll wait."

「好啦，我等就是了。」

Dang, I knew it was a trap.

真是，我就知道這是條不歸路。

But you know what... It's cool. Imma just do me.

但你也知道，這很酷!我就是要做自己。

I'm not gonna let gender stereotypes change me.

我不會讓性別刻板印象框住我。

And, and you shouldn't either.

還有，你也不應該如此。

Anyways, I actually gotta go moisturize my skin again, so uh...

然後，我要來保濕我的皮膚了，所以...

Thank you guys so much for watching, I'll see you guys very soon, this is JeffreyFever and I'm pressing the record button, now, peace!

謝謝你的收看，這是JeffreyFever。我們下次再見，我要按下停止鍵了，拜!

Agh, now my hands are all wet.

歐，我的手都濕了!

Oh my arms are a little dry too.

我的手臂也有一點乾。

GUGH

*outro music*

(片尾音樂)