- No, it's just a lot of cocaine.

– 沒啦，不就是些古柯鹼嘛

- So when Katie gets here, I'll start the intervention.

– 等凱蒂來，我就開始這場戒毒會

- You're going to lead it?

– 是你主持喔？

Not a professional ? That's a little ghetto.

不是專業的來嗎？ 真寒酸阿 （註：ghetto 泛指貧民窟，具種族歧視意味）

(groans)

（嫌惡聲）

What?

怎樣啦？

- Ghetto?

– Ghetto？

- Oh, I can't say, "ghetto," any more?

– 噢，是不可以說 ghetto 了嗎？

Everything is so P.C. these days.

現在什麼要「政確」就是了

It's annoying how uptight you are.

你們這麼玻璃心，真的很煩欸

- I know it's easy to think that we're being uptight

– 我知道我們很容易被認為是玻璃心

but language evolves and it's fine to adapt to that.

但是語言會演變，你要去適應它

You know, we know you're not a bad person

我們知道你不是壞人

so just apologize and move on.

所以就道個歉，讓它過去吧

Stop being such a girl.

別像個女生

- Woah. - [Blonde Woman] Hang on,

–沃嗚 –〔金髮女〕給我等等

what?

你說什麼？

- No, no, no, I mean like he's being a little bitch. Like a girl.

– 喔不不不，我意思是他剛剛就像個婊子、跟女生一樣

- Okay, that's not cool.

– 夠了，真沒水準

- Like the way bitches are girls.

– 但婊子就是女的阿

Oh, okay, fine.

歐，好吧，隨便

Now this is effecting me, I think I'm with Grant.

火燒到我這邊來了！我看我跟格蘭特同一國好了

Things are getting a little out of hand in the P.C. department

政確部門有點失控了

and where do you draw the line ?

你家住海邊喔？（管太多）

- Thank you.

– 謝謝

- Thank you.

– 自己人

- We're not being too P.C., you guys are just being dicks.

– 我們才沒有政確過頭，是你們剛剛太超過

Take responsibility for the hurtful things you're saying.

要對自己說的壞話負責阿

I mean, you're obviously using girl as an insult

你剛剛很顯然把女性當作是種羞辱

and that's retarded.

那樣做很蠢

- Woah! - [All] Woah! - Hey.

– 沃嗚！ –〔全體〕沃嗚！ – 欸

- Wow, it's like no one can say anything any more.

– 哇，是不准大家發表任何意見了嗎

You guys are just trying to find stuff

你們根本是在雞蛋裡挑骨頭

that's not even there.

火侯還不夠啦！

You're searching for ghosts, man.

你們做新聞業的喔！（無中生有）

It's like no one can say anything without offending someone else these days.

現在不管說什麼，都會得罪到人

- Look, culture is just constantly shifting

– 你聽著，文化一直在改變

and it's our job as socially responsible human beings to adapt to that.

身為對社會負責的人，適應它，是我們責無旁貸的義務

Honestly, I kind of thought that you Orientals would understand.

老實說，我還以為你們東方人應該會懂（註：以oriental 稱呼亞洲人，會被視為種族歧視）

- Hey.

– 欸

- [All] Woah.

– 〔全體〕沃嗚

- What?

– 怎樣啦？

I mean, okay, well, maybe P.C. culture

我是說，對啦，好吧，或許政確文化

is getting a little bit too sensitive.

真的有點太緊迫盯人了

Everybody's always policing each other's language.

大家都在矯正彼此的用字遣詞

What happened to my first amendment rights?

奇怪，我第一修正案的權利是跑去哪了？ （註：美國第一修正案保障人們言論自由）

- It's not P.C. culture's fault, Siobhan.

– 錯不在政確文化阿，西沃恩

It's just gay to call someone Oriental.

– 錯在你稱呼他東方人，這樣很 gay （註：此處為很遜、很蠢之貶義）

- Oh !

– 歐！

- What ?

– 怎樣？

- I meant gay as in lame, not gay as in the people.

– 我說的 gay 是遜咖的意思，不是同性戀啦

Man up, pussies.

是男人就成熟點阿，娘們

- It's hurtful to use gay like that.

– 像你那樣用 gay，很傷人欸

- And it's ableist to say, " lame."

– 而且說 lame 是在歧視殘障人士欸 （註： lame 具跛腳／遜咖雙重義）

- Yeah, and man up is kind of sexist.

– 對阿，而且說男人就該成熟，有點性別歧視喔

- Also, don't use the p word.

– 還有，可以不要用娘們這個詞嗎

It's gross.

很難聽欸

- Oh my God !

– 我 的 天 ！

I'm so sick of this P.C. social justice warrior atmosphere,

我真是受夠這場烏煙瘴氣的政確正義戰

to live in a world where every word is a landmine

這種字字都在玩踩地雷的社會

is not the kind of world I want to live in.

才不是我想待的社會

- It's not the world's fault, okay.

– 不是這個社會的錯，好嗎

You're being a dick for clinging to hurtful phrases.

你自己白目，成天把那些字眼掛嘴邊

You can still use them if you want,

你當然還是可以說那些字阿

just know that everyone's going to think you're an asshole.

只是要有被大家當混帳的覺悟

Don't blame the world for being politically correct.

不要怪這個政治正確的社會

- You know, actually, politically correct is not really politically correct any more.

– 其實連政治正確，都不政確了

(everyone groaning)

（眾人不耐聲）

It's a micro-aggression.

那是微侵略 （註：一種更精巧的霸凌、歧視）

- That's crazy.

– 到底有完沒完阿

- Crazy ?!

– 有完沒完？！

That has not been okay for awhile now.

從剛剛到現在就沒有片刻安寧過

- Then I guess I won't say anything at all.

– 那我乾脆都不要說話就好了啊

I guess you're always right and I'm always wrong.

反正你都真理，我都歪理

- Oh, come on, just admit for one goddamn second

– 歐，少來這套，打開天窗說亮話吧！

that we're all the assholes here.

在場的各位都是混帳阿！

- [Everyone] I'm not an asshole.

– 〔眾人〕我才不是

(yelling, fighting)

（吼叫、爭執）

- This is why I do this.

– 知道為什麼我需要這個了吧

- Hi, I'm Cynthia from College Humor.

– 嗨，我是《 College Humor 》頻道的辛西雅

Click here to subscribe.

請點這裡訂閱

Click here for more fun stuff.

點這裡看更多有趣的東西

And now for a wipe breakdown.

現在來段背景舞蹈吧

Star wipe.

星星

Diamond wipe.

鑽石

Venetian wipe.

威尼斯

Iris.

虹膜