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  • Today, we're working with fellow prankster, Vitaly.

    今天,我們要跟惡作劇專家維塔利合作

  • We've got crutches, a mangled van,

    我們有一根拐杖和一台舊貨車

  • and a big-ass cat.

    還有一隻大「貓咪」

  • We're gonna make people think

    我們要讓人以為

  • they're taking an injured person's groceries to their car.

    他們是在幫一個受傷的人拿食物到車上

  • But when they get to the car, they're gonna find a tiger.

    但當他們走到車子前,會發現有一隻老虎

  • Rah! Grr!

    嗷— —, 吼— —

  • Jeana: All right, game on.

    吉娜:好了,惡作劇開始

  • Jesse's up first.

    傑西先上

  • Jesse: Could you maybe, like, help me bring it to my vehicle?

    傑西:麻煩你幫忙把這個拿到我的車上好嗎?

  • I rolled my ankle 'cause

    我的腳扭傷了是為了

  • I was trying to bring this cat home from the zoo.

    把這隻貓咪從動物園帶回家裡

  • All right, it's right over here.

    好了,就在那裡

  • Right here.

    這裡

  • Look at the guy, look at -- he's like,

    看那傢伙,你看--他一臉

  • "Why is" -- his mouth is wide open.

    「怎麼回事?」嘴張的超大

  • We gotta do this quick.

    我們動作要快一點

  • Hang on. Are you kidding me?

    等一下,你在跟我開玩笑嗎?

  • No, no, this -- is this a bad thing?

    不,這個--這樣不對嗎?

  • [ Laughs ] Look at this guy.

    看這傢伙

  • Can you maybe open the door as I throw it in there?

    你可以幫我開門,好讓我把東西放進去嗎?

  • Hi, can you help me with this meat right here?

    嗨,可以幫我把拿一下這袋肉嗎?

  • I just need to put it in my vehicle.

    我需要把它放進車裡

  • You mean put it in the car? Yeah, yeah.

    你是說把這放進車裡嗎?是的

  • I have my cat in there.

    我的貓在車子裡

  • She's pretty nice. See her in there?

    她很乖的,有看到她在裡面嗎?

  • Oh, wait a minute.

    噢,等一下

  • I'm not going in there.

    我才不要過去

  • What?

    什麼?

  • I think you better take him to the zoo.

    我覺得你應該要帶他去動物園

  • I mean, that's where I took him from.

    可是,我就是從動物園帶他出來的

  • Hi, yeah, yeah, could you maybe give me a hand?

    嗨,可以幫個忙嗎?

  • I rolled my ankle the other day.

    我前幾天拐到我的腳踝了

  • I was playing with my cat.

    那時候,我在跟我的貓玩

  • Oh, here she is.

    啊,她就在那裏

  • -No freakin' way! -What?!

    絕對不要!-什麼?!

  • Could you open the door for me?

    你可以幫我開門嗎?

  • -Well, why not? -No, no, no, no.

    啊,為什麼不行? -不,不,不,不

  • I'm not going that way,

    我不要往那邊去

  • She's hungry, come on.

    她餓了,快來嘛

  • She's hungry, please.

    拜託,她餓了

  • No, plea --

    別走,拜託--

  • Do you cat-sit?

    你照顧貓咪嗎?

  • Jesse: All right, Jeana, let's see what you've got.

    傑西:好了,吉娜,接下來就看你了

  • All right, here we go, here we go.

    好了,我們來了,我們來了

  • Can you help me to my car?

    可以幫我拿到車上嗎?

  • Thank you.

    謝謝

  • Say you hurt yourself trying to save a stray today.

    跟他說你為了救一個流浪兒在今天受傷

  • I was trying to save a stray cat near the zoo.

    我在動物園附近試著救一隻流浪貓

  • I have it here in the car right now.

    那隻貓現在就在車裡

  • She's here with me in the car.

    她跟我在一起

  • What should we do with it?

    我們要怎麼做

  • What should we do with it?

    我們要怎麼做

  • I don't know.

    我不知道

  • I'm gonna open the door, and you grab her.

    等下我會開門,你就抓住他

  • I'll open the door, and you could grab her.

    等下我會開門,你就抓住他

  • Yeah, yeah, yeah, look.

    看這個

  • You don't want to touch her?

    你不想碰她嗎?

  • Do you think I'm crazy?

    你以為我瘋了?

  • No. Hell no.-Hell no?

    不,當然不要-不要?

  • Okay.

    好吧

  • Thank you.

    謝謝你

  • -Give him a hug. -Thank you.

    給他一個抱抱-謝謝你

  • Thank you so much.

    真的非常感謝你

  • Oh, no, no, no.

    喔,不,不,不

  • Oh, he tried to get her number!

    哦,他在跟他要電話!

  • Ew!

    唉呦

  • I have a cat, and I tripped over her.

    我有隻貓,我不小心被她絆倒了

  • She's really big.

    她真的超級大隻

  • Yeah, that's my cat.

    是的,那就是我的貓

  • Good lord! Stop it.

    我的媽呀! 別鬧了

  • Why do you think I have all that meat?

    不然你覺得我怎麼會買那些肉?

  • Who's the wrangler? I am.

    誰是馴獸師?-就是我

  • You are -- stop it.

    你是--不可能

  • I mean, I'm trying to be.

    我是說,我正在努力中

  • Here we go. Prank time, you ready?

    我們開始吧。你準備好惡作劇了嗎?

  • Now let's see what Vitaly can do.

    現在,來看維塔利怎麼做

  • All right, V, you hear me?

    行了,維,你聽得到我嗎?

  • Yeah, we ready?

    有,我們好了嗎?

  • Yeah, yeah, we're ready.

    好,我們準備好了

  • Excuse me, mamacita, can you help me with my bags, please?

    不好意思,美女,請問你可以幫我拿這袋東西嗎?

  • -Where are you going? -Right here, this car.

    你要去哪裡?-就在這邊,那輛車

  • I'm around the corner.

    就在附近

  • Huh?

    蛤?

  • No, you don't... You don't have to open it.

    不,你不用...你不需要開門

  • No, no, no, no, no, no!

    不,不— —

  • Where is your automobile?

    你的車在哪?

  • This is my car.

    這台是我的車

  • No, no, no!

    不,不要啊!

  • Don't open the door.

    不要開門

  • [ Gasps ] Vitaly, you cannot let her open the door!

    維塔莉,快阻止她開門

  • Don't open the door!

    不要打開門!

  • Thank you. That's it, that's it.

    謝謝你,這樣就行了

  • You can't open it. Open it, bite you.

    你不能打開。你開了,會被咬的

  • What the hell, man?

    搞什麼鬼?

  • I like this. Let's keep going.

    我喜歡,繼續看下去

  • Excuse me.

    不好意思

  • Ma'am, could you help me, please?

    女士,請問你可以幫我嗎?

  • Do you lift or what?

    你有在健身嗎?

  • "Do you lift or what?"

    你健身嗎?

  • Thank you so much.

    非常謝謝

  • Talk about how you have to feed your animal.

    談談你怎麼餵你的寵物

  • I gotta feed my dog.

    我得餵我的狗

  • Yeah, dog is very big.

    是啊,很大隻的狗

  • Here's my car.

    這就是我的車了

  • Big dog.

    大狗

  • Here.

    給你

  • Can you please put it in?

    請你幫我放進去好嗎?

  • What?

    什麼?

  • No, I don't want to.

    不,我不要

  • Please.

    拜託

  • Please, please, please!

    拜託,求求你了!

  • Please!

    拜託

  • She's still running. She ran into the store!

    她還在跑,跑進店裡了!

  • Yo, Vitaly, I [bleep] love you!

    維塔利,我[嗶]愛死你了

  • There's no way to beat that reaction.

    沒有比這更好笑的反應了

Today, we're working with fellow prankster, Vitaly.

今天,我們要跟惡作劇專家維塔利合作

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