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  • ON LAST NIGHT'S SHOW WE TALKED ABOUT THE CLIMATE SUMMIT IN

  • PARIS AND HOW IMPORTANT IT IS TO THE FUTURE OF MAN KIND.

  • BUT NOW I KNOW WE SHOULD HAVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT SOMETHING

  • MUCH MORE DANGEROUS.

  • >> WE ARE TALKING ABOUT THE EXISTENTIAL THREAT TO MAN KIND

  • FROM GLOBAL WARMING.

  • YOU KNOW, GRADUALLY IN THE FUTURE, WHAT ABOUT WHAT IS

  • HAPPENING RIGHT NOW.

  • WHAT ABOUT WHEN YOU SAW THOSE AMAZON DRONES DELIVERING THE

  • PROTOTYPES, DELIVERING GOODS TO PEOPLE'S HOMES.

  • WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ISIS GETS A DRONE AND PUTS A BOMB ON IT AND

  • FLIES IT SOME PLACE.

  • >> Trevor: YEAH, YEAH. WHY TALK ABOUT THE REAL THING THAT

  • COULD GRADUALLY DESTROY CIVILIZATION OVER TIME WHEN WE

  • COULD BE TALKING ABOUT THE MORE IMMEDIATE THING THAT I'M MAKING

  • UP RIGHT NOW.

  • I'M SORRY, ISIS BOMBS ON AMAZON DRONES?

  • OH, AND EVEN WORSE WHAT IF ISIS GETS THEIR HANDS ON AN AMAZON

  • PRIME ACCOUNT. OH, IT WILL BE FREE-TWO-DAY SHIPPING ON BOMBS

  • IN NEW YORK, SAME DAY.

  • ADD TO CART.

  • PEOPLE ARE RIGHT, WE SHOULD BE WORRIED ABOUT ISIS.

  • THEY'RE THE WORLD'S MOST FEARED TERRORISTS AND EVEN WORSE THEY

  • HAVE RUINED THE REPUTATION OF LEMON ISIS WHOSE ONLY GOAL IS TO

  • SPREAD FROSTY TART DESSERTS ACROSS THE MIDDLE EASTED.

  • AND FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH, ISIS IS GETTING PLENTY OF NEW ATTENTION.

  • >> MORE U.S. SPECIAL OPERATIONS FORCES ARE NOW HEADING TO IRAQ

  • AND TO SYRIA.

  • >> IN FULL COORDINATION IN THE GOVERNMENT OF IRAQ WE'RE

  • DEPLOYING AN SPECIALIZED EXPEDITIONARY TARGETING FORCE TO

  • ASSIST IRAQI AND KURDISH PESHMERGA FORCES AND PUT EVEN

  • MORE PRESSURE ON ISIL.

  • >> Trevor: YES, THE U.S. IS GOING AFTER ISIS IN FULL

  • COORDINATION WITH THE GOVERNMENT OF IRAQ.

  • THAT'S KIND OF KEY HERE.

  • YOU CAN'T REMOVE A TOXIC ELEMENT WITHOUT THE FULL COOPERATION OF

  • THE BODY IT'S INFECTING.

  • ISN'T THAT RIGHT, MY APPENDIX!

  • YOU WERE THE ISIS OF MY DIE GUESS TIFF SYSTEM.

  • I WILL TELL YOU WHAT I LIKE ABOUT THIS PLAN.

  • FULL COORDINATION WITH THE GOVERNMENT OF IRAQ.

  • THAT SEEMS LIKE THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THE WHOLE

  • OPERATION BECAUSE WITHOUT THAT, I DON'T THINK I'D DO THIS.

  • >> IRAQ PRIME MINISTER HAIDER AL ABADI SAID HIS FORCES WERE

  • CAPABLE OF DEFEATING ISIS WITHOUT THE HELP OF FOREIGN

  • COMBAT TROOPS.

  • >> ANY FOREIGN FORCE WHICH ENTERS IRAQ WILL BE VIEWED AS AN

  • INVADING FORCE.

  • >> Trevor: AH!

  • SEE, I ALWAYS KNEW THE INVASION OF IRAQ WOULD ONE DAY COME BACK

  • TO BITE THE U.S.

  • I KNEW IT, I KNEW IT.

  • SO IRAQ HAS DECIDED THAT THEY CAN TAKE ON ISIS BY THEMSELVES.

  • AND THEY'RE NOT GOING TO BE THE ONLY ONES TRYING TO BE THE ONLY

  • ONES.

  • >> ANONYMOUS, THE HACKTIVIST GROUP SHROUDED IN SECRECY,

  • HAS DECLARED WAR ON ISIS FOLLOWING THE ATTACKS IN PARIS.

  • >> THIS IS A MESSAGE TO ISIS.

  • YOU HAVE REACHED A LIMIT.

  • >> Trevor: OH, SNAP.

  • YOU HAVE REACHED YOUR LIMIT, ISIS.

  • YOUR FREE VERSION OF TERRORISM HAS EXPIRED.

  • IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO PAY FOR THE PRO VERSION.

  • COME ON, WE'RE TALKING ABOUT ISIS HERE.

  • HOW EFFECTIVE CAN ANONYMOUS BE.

  • >> MORE THAN 20,000 TWITTER ACCOUNTS BELONGING TO ISIS WERE

  • JUST TAKEN DOWN BY ANONYMOUS.

  • ISIS, WE WILL HUNT YOU, TAKE DOWN YOUR SITES, ACCOUNTS, AN

  • E-MAILS AND EXPOSE YOU.

  • >> Trevor: I HAVE A PARTICULAR SET OF SKILLS.

  • WE WILL HUNT YOU DOWN.

  • WE WILL FIND YOU.

  • AND WE WILL MAKE YOU-- MOM!

  • I'M RECORDING A MESSAGE FOR ISIS!

  • BRING THE POP TARTS DOWN HERE!

  • COME ON!

  • HEY, ANONYMOUS, I WAS JUST JOKE BEING THE POP TART THING.

  • YOU GUYS SEEM LIKE VERY NICE HACKERS, PLEASE DON'T HACK ME

  • AND DESTROY MY LIFE.

  • (LAUGHTER)

  • BY THE WAY, IF YOU ARE A CELEBRITY, NOW SAY GREAT TIME

  • TO TAKE SOME BATHROOM NUDES BECAUSE IT SEEMS LIKE ALL THE

  • TOP HACKERS ARE BUSY WITH THIS ISIS THING.

  • >> THERE'S ANOTHER TECHICALLY SOPHISTICATED GROUP FIGHTING AN

  • ONLINE WAR WITH ISIS.

  • THEY CALL THEMSELVES GHOST SECURITY GROUP.

  • IT'S LEADERS AN EX-ANONYMOUS MEMBER, A MAN WHO CALLS HIMSELF

  • DIGITA SHADOW.

  • >> MY ONLINE NAME IS DIGITA SHADOW.

  • >> Trevor: LOOK, DIGITA SHADOW. IF YOU WANT TO SCARE

  • ISIS, MAYBE DON'T PICK A NAME THAT LOOSELY TRANSLATES TO

  • SHADOW FINGERS.

  • >> 'TIS I, SHADOW FINGERS.

  • I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN LIKE A DOG AND DESTROY YOU, BONNY ISIS.

  • OH NO, HE'S GETTING AWAY!

  • JUST A LIGHTHEARTED JOKE, MR. SHADOW, SIR, I'M A HUGE FAN

  • OF YOUR HACKING.

  • YOU HOLD ALL THE POWER IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.

  • PLEASE DON'T DOXX ME AND DESTROY MY LIFE.

  • NOW UNFORTUNATELY WE CAN'T ONLY DEAL WITH ISIS ONLINE.

  • IT'S NOT LIKE EVERY OTHER ASPECT OF OUR LIVES.

  • AND THANKFULLY THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE OFFERING PRACTICAL

  • SOLUTIONS.

  • >> THE NATION'S LARGEST POLICE UNION IS PUSHING FOR SOME NFL

  • FANS TO BE ALLOWED TO CARRY CONCEALED WEAPONS IN STADIUMS.

  • >> THE LETTER CITED THE RECENT ATTACKS IN A SOCCER STADIUM IN

  • PARIS SAYING ON DUTY POLICE OFFICERS MAY NOT BE ABLE TO FIND

  • AND NEUTRALIZE EVERY POTENTIAL THREAT.

  • >> Trevor: OH, YEAH, ARMING FOOTBALL FANS.

  • WHO LOOKED AT A STADIUM FILLED WITH DRUNK DUDES SCREAMING AT

  • ATHLETES AND THINKS, YOU KNOW WHAT THESE GUYS NEED?

  • GUNS.

  • YEAH, YEAH.

  • YOU REALLY WANT GUNS FOR THESE EAGLE FANS WHO USE SNOW AS A

  • WEAPON, REALLY?

  • THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT?

  • YOU WANT THEM TO GET SNOW.

  • THEY USE SNOW, YOU KNOW THAT PEACEFUL SUBSTANCE, THAT ALMOST

  • WATER, YEAH, YEAH.

  • AND YOU WANT THEM TO HAVE GUNS AT GAMES NOW, THAT IS WHAT YOU

  • ARE SAYING?

  • SORRY, EAGLES FANS, THAT YOU ARE EAGLES FANS.

  • (LAUGHTER) (APPLAUSE)

  • POLICE, I GET THE SENTIMENTS.

  • BUT SOMETIMES THE COPS CAN'T HELP.

  • AN WHEN THAT HAPPENS, YOU HAVE TO TURN TO SOMEBODY ELSE FOR A

  • LITTLE PROTECTION.

  • >> ISIS HAS A BRAND NEW OPPONENT, THE NEW YORK MAFIA.

  • >> THE SON OF NOTORIOUS MOB FRANCESCO GAMBINO SAYS THEY

  • CAN PROTECT AMERICA BETTER THAN THE COPS.

  • >> Trevor: I LOVE THE IDEA THAT THE MOB IS GOING TO PROTECT

  • AMERICA FROM ISIS.

  • YOU CAN IMAGINE THOSE GUYS? "HEY, ISIS, YOU GOT A NICE

  • BURGEOING CALIPHATE HERE. WOULDN'T IT BE ASHAME IF

  • SOMETHING WOULD HAPPEN TO IT, CAPISCE?"

  • APPARENTLY THERE WAS AN ARTICLE IN "THE NEW YORK POST"

  • THAT CLAIMED THAT THE MAFIA CLAIMED WAR ON ISIS AND GAMBINO

  • WENT ON FOX TO DISCUSS IT.

  • >> THERE WAS AN ARTICLE ON "THE NEW YORK POST," MOST OF IT IS

  • BULLSHIT.

  • >> JUST AS A REMINDER, WE HAVE KIDS WATCHING, PLEASE WATCH THE

  • LANGUAGE THIS MORNING.

  • >> OH, YEAH, YEAH, NO PROBLEM.

  • >> Trevor: OH, YEAH, YEAH, THE KIDS. I CAN'T BELIEVE I [BLEEP]

  • OH, I'M SUCH A [BLEEP] OH, SHIT I KEEP --

  • HEY, MR. GAMBINO, I'M SO [BLEEP] SORRY.

  • OKAY, MR. GAMBINO, SO THE BIG QUESTION IS WHAT DOES THE MAFIA

  • HAVE TO DO WITH ISIS?

  • AND PLEASE MAKE IT BULLSHIT.

  • >> THE BIRTH OF THE MAFIA WAS THE LATE 1200.

  • AND TO PROTECT ITS CITIZENS AND THERE WAS AN EVIL EMPIRE JUST

  • LIKE ISIS, JUST LIKE ISIS.

  • >> Trevor: I SEE, HE'S DESCRIBING ANOTHER SPLINTER

  • GROUP, ITALIAN ISIS.

  • (LAUGHTER)

  • YOU SEE, THE GREAT THING IN THIS SITUATION IS THAT YOU DON'T

  • EVEN HAVE TO BE A PART OF AN ORGANIZATION TO MAKE A

  • DIFFERENCE.

  • ANYONE CAN STEP UP TO FIGHT ISIS NO MATTER HOW LITTLE YOU KNOW

  • ABOUT THEM OR HOW RACIST YOU ARE.

  • >> IN TEXAS OVER THE WEEKEND A GROUP OF PROTESTORS, SOME OF

  • THEM ARMED, LINED UP OUTSIDE A MOSQUE IN IRVING.

  • SOME OF THE DEMONSTRATORS HELD SIGNS READING STOP THE

  • ISLAMIZATION OF AMERICA.

  • WORSHIPERS WERE URGED TO STEER CLEAR OF THE GROUP.

  • >> WE ARE HERE PROTESTING SYRIAN REFUGEES COMING TO AMERICA.

  • PROTESTING THE ISLAMIZATION OF AMERICA.

  • >> Trevor: WOW.

  • I FEEL SO BAD FOR THESE SYRIAN REFUGEES, CAN YOU IMAGINE

  • FLEEING OVER 7,000 MILES TO GET AWAY FROM THIS GUY AND YOU

  • FINALLY MAKE IT TO AMERICA AND THE FIRST THING YOU SEE WHEN YOU

  • ARRIVE AT YOUR NEW MOSQUE IS THIS GUY.

  • THEY MUST BE A LITTLE BIT LIKE BUGS BUNNY, NO MATTER HOW FAR

  • THEY TRAVEL THERE IS ALWAYS AN IDIOT WITH A BIG GUN TRYING TO

  • HUNT THEM DOWN.

ON LAST NIGHT'S SHOW WE TALKED ABOUT THE CLIMATE SUMMIT IN

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每日秀--打擊ISIS的鬥爭 (The Daily Show - The Fight Against ISIS)

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    VoiceTube 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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